Larry and the Meaning of Life (7 page)

BOOK: Larry and the Meaning of Life
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“She tried to have you killed!” Beth shouted. “She set up Janine. You lost the election because of her!”
“Tell me something I don't know,” I snapped. “I thought Janine was going to shove her into the pond.”
“You are
not
going through with this operation,” Peter said.
“Obviously,” I said.
“Did Gus know about this?” Beth asked. “The guy knows everything else about your life. I bet he set this up on purpose.”
I told her Gus denied knowing anything about my past history with betagold but I didn't believe him for a second.
“Is there any good news?” Beth asked. “Besides betagold being fatally ill?”
“I hate her,” I said. “But I don't want her to die.” I took my bowl of uneaten oatmeal to the sink. “I guess the good news is that Janine is talking to me again. Betagold has taken her mind off Brady, at least for a while.”
“You should've seen betagold's face when she realized who the donor was,” Peter told Beth. “You could see her hopes for a new kidney vanishing before her eyes. I almost felt bad for her.”

That
would've been worth cutting drama class for,” Beth said.
As much as I agreed with them, I felt that all the hate bouncing across the kitchen went directly against everything I believed in. I'd spent a lot of energy trying not to take betagold's obsession with my downfall personally, and all this talk stirred up those old negative feelings. As much as I didn't want to help betagold, I didn't want to hurt her, either. Life was too short. Maybe the weeks spent with Gus instead of on the couch were paying off.
Since Janine had actually spoken to me again, I decided to surprise her at Victopia. On the ride over, I replayed yesterday afternoon in my mind. After seeing me, betagold had talked about the grandchildren she'd like to spend more time with and the mistakes she'd made. But most of all, she talked about forgiveness. She held my eyes like a laser beam. By the end, she—and everyone else—was almost crying. Everyone except Janine, Peter, and me. Gus looked at me as if to say, “Well?” I walked past betagold up the hill to the parking lot without a word.
Katie seemed surprised when she answered the door at Victopia. It appeared as if Janine had just woken up; she held the door ajar with her foot.
“Aren't you going to invite me in?” I asked. You'd think volunteering to donate a major organ would get you off the commuting list.
“The house is a mess,” Janine said. “Let me get dressed—we can go for a walk.”
I peeked my head through the small space. “What's going on? Are you with Gus?”
“Will you stop? He's the only reason I'm keeping it together since Brady died.”
Mike returned and asked me to help him stack wood; I felt as if he was babysitting me while Janine got ready. She emerged in a few minutes, and we hiked down the road to Walden.
“Can you imagine either of us giving a kidney to betagold?” Janine asked. “The organization double-checked her application—all that charitable work is true. I know it sounds sick, but I wouldn't be surprised if she planned this whole thing as some new way to mess around with your mind.”
“Not to sound egotistical, but I was thinking the same thing. Of all the kidneys, in all the towns, in all the world, she signs up for mine.”
64
“Seventeen people die every day waiting for a kidney transplant. If a living donor doesn't volunteer, they have to wait for someone to die.”
“Maybe betagold got tired of waiting for me to croak, and this is the closest she could get,” I said.
When we came to Brady's favorite cove, Janine choked up.
“I'm so sorry,” I said. “Maybe we can look on craigslist for a new puppy.”
“I don't want a new puppy,” she snapped. “I want Brady.”
65
She answered her cell on the first ring. “I was just thinking
about you,” she said. “Everywhere I turn, something reminds me of Brady. It's just so hard.”
It didn't take me long to figure out she was talking to Gus. Brady's death had given him Janine's full emotional attention on a platter.
66
From my hiding place behind the nearest tree, I couldn't help but hear her make plans to meet Gus later.
“Didn't you just see him at the house?” I asked as we set out on our hike.
“He's been amazing. He was on the phone with my father last night being so supportive.”
I felt a pang of envy for Janine, Mike, and Katie all playing utopian
Brady Bunch
in a giant Victorian with Gus. “Why was he talking to your dad?”
67
“My parents were worried about me and wanted to make sure I was okay. Plus, Gus was talking to my father about some investments.”
I stopped walking, as much to catch my breath as to find out more.
“My father's thinking of investing in some side projects with Gus. I don't know the details.”
I told her about the survey plans I'd found hidden on the other side of the pond. “The last people who tried to develop land out here got shut down. I hope he's not taking your father for a ride.”
“All I know is, I couldn't have dealt with losing Brady without him.”
Janine and I hiked the rest of the way in silence. I appreciated the fact that our relationship was wide enough to embrace such mutual solitude.
68
The setting was idyllic and the brisk pace invigorating, but I felt anxious. Was Janine getting in over her head? Was Gus working a scam on her parents? As we reached the crest and gazed down to the water below, betagold seemed the least of my worries.
When I pulled my bike into the Walden parking lot the next day, the first person I saw was betagold. She was standing next to the bike rack; I had to avoid catching the tubes of her oxygen tank as I ran the cable and lock around the frame of my bike.
“My body is falling apart,” she said. “But I have money and a specific blood type. Let me buy your kidney.”
I told her selling an organ was against the law and I wasn't interested in joining the black market, thank you very much.
“What's in the past is done,” she said.
“Because it's convenient for you? I don't think so.” She had probably lost thirty pounds since I first met her; she looked gaunt and pale. I wished her good luck in finding another donor.
She put her hands on her knees and breathed deeply. Even though she'd ruined my life several times, I couldn't leave her in such pain. When I asked if she wanted me to call 911, she told me she had these spells several times a day.
“Look, I admit what I did was wrong,” betagold said. “I apologize. Can't we leave it at that?”
“No, we can't. Now if you're feeling better, I'll be on my way.”
When she grabbed me by the arm, her grip was weak. “How about if I offer you something better than money?”
“I doubt you have anything I need.” I said goodbye and headed toward the pond.
After a moment, I turned around. She was dragging the oxygen tank behind her, trying to catch up. I waited by the cabin replica until she did.
“You know that hole in the woods you're so fond of?” she asked. “How about if I told you I know people on the zoning board who can preserve that land.”
“Are you trying to bribe me into giving you my kidney?”
“Obviously.”
“And how do you know about that hole?”
She told me she'd read my books.
69
“Don't think of it as a bribe. Think of it as an exchange.” She dragged the oxygen tank up the step and sat on the replica of Thoreau's cot. When a group of tourists came by, betagold and I leaned back against the inside wall so as not to ruin their shot.
70
“After taking care of my grandchildren, I'll leave the bulk of my estate to the charitable organization of your choice,” betagold continued. “An anticonsumerism group, a foundation for people working in sweatshops, a nature conservancy.” She took a deep breath from her oxygen mask. “You can come with me to the attorney's. She can adapt my will according to your requests.” She looked me straight in the eye; as sick as she was, her blue eyes remained clear. “My estate is worth three
million dollars now. That kind of money can sow a lot of good in the world.”
“As much as I'd love to contribute to the betterment of the planet, my internal organs are not for sale.” I watched her fight for each breath. She was just someone's grandmother, after all. “No offense, but I can't imagine part of me being part of you, no matter how much you pledge to charity.”
“How about your criminal record? Or getting you reinstated at Princeton?”
“How do you know about that?”
“I know lots of things. You should know that my brother-in-law has been on the board there for years. Your academic future can be back on track with a phone call.”
I lifted up my shirt and rubbed my back. Would I miss a kidney? Would it be worth giving up one of them to keep my favorite woods undeveloped, wipe my record clean, and get back into Princeton? Not to mention a substantial donation to a worthy charity. I leaned back in the tiny cabin and weighed the options. But even after several minutes of listening to betagold gasp for breath, I had to tell her no.
She took the news surprisingly well. “I know you hate me, but are you sure? Thoreau himself once wrote ‘It is never too late to give up your prejudices.'”
“Thanks, but no thanks,” I said.
She shook my hand and wished me well. When we got back to the parking lot, she reached into her fanny pack.
71
“You
might want to see these.” She handed me several photographs. Janine and Gus by the fire. Janine leaning her head on Gus's shoulder. Janine and Gus kissing.
I returned them to her. “You could've doctored these in Photoshop.”
She went into her pack again and took out a digital camera. She scrolled through the stored images, identical to the photographs. “He's toying with her, taking advantage of his position as a teacher. Trying to rip her off.”
The disturbing images confirmed my worst fear. The only good news was that as much as the thought of Janine and Gus infuriated me, it also meant I wasn't paranoid.
She held up the most incriminating picture.
72
“I can get him to stop seeing her tomorrow. All you have to do is agree to the operation.”
“She's not my girlfriend anymore,” I said. “She can do whatever she wants.”
“Yes, but she's your
friend.
You love her. I guarantee you, he will mop the floor with her emotions. To say nothing of her parents' bank account. He is one tough Saudi Arabian.”
I gave up trying to figure out Gus's ethnicity and instead asked betagold how she planned to get Janine away from him.
“He has his price, believe me.”
I thought about everything Janine and I had been through. Was she really in trouble? Did I owe her this after accusing her of spying during the campaign? After killing her dog? Or was beta gold up to something even more sinister this time around?
When I looked at her now, though, she only seemed sick and old.
“Saving the land, wiping my record clean, Princeton, adjusting your will, and getting Gus to stop seeing Janine in exchange for my kidney? Is that it?”
“And I pick up all medical costs. That's what I'm offering.”
I told her first I had to speak to Janine.
“But you'll consider it?” betagold asked.
“I will.”
She seemed so relieved, I thought she might collapse. As I helped her into her van, I wondered if I'd just made a deal with the devil.
Cabin site of Henry David Thoreau at Walden Pond
BOOK: Larry and the Meaning of Life
13.42Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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