Learning to Dance Again (21 page)

‘That would be awful.’

‘Yeah, it really would. I couldn’t stay here without Amy.’

‘She wouldn’t really leave Shetland though
would she? I mean, her family’s here, and she would have to get a job then wouldn’t she?’

‘Maybe not, but I wouldn’t
want to take the chance. She’s been acting so strangely since John dumped her.’

There was a loud clatter from the kitchen and Cameron jumped up to investigate. Julia followed him and saw the girls had allowed the cat to jump up onto the table and it had knocked over one
of the plastic beakers of juice; and a plate of half eaten pizza was lying on the floor.

‘Have you two finished eating?’ Cameron said, as the girls got up to leave the room.

There was no reply, just the sound of footsteps charging upstairs.

‘I’ll take that as a yes then.’

Julia helped Cameron clear the mess from the table while he put their pizza in the oven.

‘Would you like a glass of wine? I haven’t even offered you a drink yet?’

‘Tea would be better. I have to drive down to the airport soon.’

‘Of course. I don’t suppose your house will look like it’s had a wrecking ball hit it just an hour after the boys get home,’ Cameron said
, as he swept up pizza and pieces of cucumber from the floor.

‘Don’t you believe it!’

Cameron put the kettle on and made two mugs of tea. He carried it over to the table where Julia was sitting.

‘I would invite you round for Christmas Day, but it might be a bit tense this year,’ Julia said quietly.

‘Don’t be silly. I’ll be fine. If John is at Heather’s I might go over to Dawn’s house instead. I shan’t be on my own. I’m hoping Laura will let me come over in the morning to see Amy open her presents. She might even be civilised enough to let me stay for dinner. Who knows?’

‘Why don’t you come over on Boxing Day then? We don’t have anything planned, although I expect the boys will
want to go and catch up with their friends at some stage. We might even have a bit of an open-house that night.’

‘I might do that, thanks!’

When the pizza was ready Cameron took it out of the oven and put it on a plate in the middle of the table. Julia helped herself to a slice and some salad.

‘Yum, this is nice.’

‘Thanks; I bought myself a new Italian cookbook. This is a Sicilian recipe.’

Julia smiled at him. He reached across the table for the pepper. For a split second she thought he was reaching for her hand. She realised she had flinched, and she put down her fork and picked up her glass as if that had been her intention. Cameron did not seem to notice.

While he was occupied with the pepper mill she watched him. She had never been alone with him in his house before. He seemed different; quieter but more relaxed. She looked around the kitchen and observed he kept it spotlessly clean, at least when Amy was not around to untidy it. In this respect he was different to Duncan who simply did not notice untidiness. She wondered whether Cameron looked after the house on his own. She couldn’t resist asking.

‘Do you employ a cleaner?’

Cameron looked around the kitchen guiltily.

‘Um no, why? Do you think I should get one?’

‘No, of course not. It’s just that apart from the obvious Amy related mess this house is immaculate, and what with you being so busy at work, I wondered how you managed.’

‘Well, I do get someone to do the ironing. But only because I hate ironing. But other than that I do everything myself.
I always have been rather domesticated. It surprises people.’

Julia nodded and laughed.

‘Yes, I suppose it doesn’t go with your playboy image.’

‘Oh please;
I hope I’ve shaken off that idea by now. I’m not that kind of man at all. Especially not now.’

He pointed upstairs to where Amy could be heard singing along to a Jessie J
song with Lucy. They listened for a moment to the strains of the two five year old girls singing “it’s not about the money, money, money…”

‘Point taken.’ Julia said.

‘So anyway; did you enjoy the rest of your holiday? I haven’t seen you since to ask.’

Julia detected a
hint of hurt in his voice, but his face looked untroubled as he bit into another piece of the potato and rosemary pizza.

‘Yeah, it was great thanks.
Although, Bryden split up with his girlfriend the day before he arrived, so that was a bit sad for him. But he perked up a bit by the end of his week. Then I had a week or so on my own again, and I managed to make some decisions about my future. So yeah, the holiday was a success.’

Cameron reached for his glass of water a
nd looked enquiringly at her.

‘What kind of decision?’

‘About work; what I’m going to do with my life; how I’m going to move on.’

‘That’
s good; what did you decide?’

Julia was busy chewing pizza so she didn’t answer fo
r a moment. Cameron watched her; a serious expression on his face.

‘I’
ve applied to become a foster carer. It takes a few months to get approved, but if I am, then I shall be looking after children at my home.’

‘Wow, fostering; t
hat’s brave.’

Julia shook her head. It didn’t feel like a brave thing to do. It felt a little bit like hiding
away from the world, but perhaps she was being naive.

‘I don’t really have any other skills to offer, so I don’
t have that many options.’

Cameron nodded thoughtfully, but before he could reply they were interrupted by the sound of vigorous bouncing on a bed above their heads.

Cameron stood up and walked to the foot of the stairs and shouted up to the girls.

‘Amy! What have I told you about jumping on the bed?’

The bouncing stopped instantly, to be replaced by giggling, which morphed into cackling as the girls realised there wouldn’t be any further repercussions.

Cameron sat down at the table again.

‘Seriously? Fostering? You want to do all this again with young kids?’

‘Yeah! Can’t wait. I would much rather be chasing after a couple of hooligans like those two than sitting around on my own. What’s the point of having such a lovely
big home when I have nobody to share it with? Jamie and Bryden don’t come back very often now. They have their own lives.’

‘When you put it like that.’

‘Speaking of which. I really ought to be going soon. I have to pick them up.’

Cameron looked at his watch in surprise.

‘Where did the time go? We never really got a chance to talk. Maybe when I don’t have Amy?’

Julia stood up and picked up her handbag.

‘Thanks for lunch; it was great. Have a lovely Christmas won’t you!’

‘And you!’

Cameron followed her out to her car. As she fiddled in her pocket for the keys he put his arm around her shoulder and kissed her cheek. It felt like old times when they were just friends. Julia put her arm around him and hugged him back.

‘We’ll always be friends,
’ Cameron said. ‘I don’t expect anything from you. You don’t need to worry about what happened.’

‘Thanks. I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch. I wasn’t sure how things would be once we got home again.’

‘Well, if I can paraphrase Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca – we will always have Palermo.’

Julia laughed. She got into her car and drove away, feeling a huge sense of relief, and then a moment later, a rush of excitement at the idea of picking up her boys. Christmas would start in less than an hour.

17

Julia leaned against the window sill and watched the plane taxi back to the terminal. A couple of minutes later the ground crew had put the steps in place and were busy unloading baggage from the hold. She watched the first passengers descend onto the tarmac and make their way across to the building. It was only just after three in the afternoon but the sky was darkening quickly. It wasn’t raining, but it was cold and breezy. Julia recognised Bryden in the gloom but saw he was on his own. He walked quickly away from the plane to get out of the cold and Julia stared at the steps of the aircraft wondering what had happened to Jamie.

Bryden stopped and looked back at the plane, and Julia realised he too was waiting for Jamie. She sighed with relief, and then saw the man himself walking slowly towards her. He carried a duty free bag and a book
, and his head was lowered as if he was not interested in any of his surroundings. He did not look happy to be home.

Julia headed towards the door where the passengers would appear just as Bryden walked through. He grinned at Julia and held his arms out to her. He hugged her and then picked her up and swung her around.

‘I’m back!’

‘Yeah, I can see that. Did you have a good flight?’ Julia said
, as he put her down again.

‘Yes, but w
ord to the wise, our boy Jamie’s in a foul mood. Approach with caution!’

At that moment Jamie appeared and Julia smiled at him. She went to hug him, but he moved out of her grasp. He headed straight towards the luggage carousel, even though there were no cases on it yet.

Bryden pulled a face at Julia, and then wrapped his arms around her again. He let go abruptly when he noticed one of his friends and went over to speak to them. Julia was left standing on her own for a moment. She watched Jamie who was standing with his back to her. She looked at the duty-free carrier bag containing a bottle of Russian vodka. It was a strange thing for Jamie to buy; she imagined it must be a present for someone.

The carou
sel started up and Bryden came back to retrieve his bag. Jamie’s was the last bag to appear, which did nothing to shake off the dark cloud of annoyance surrounding him.

Julia and Bryden led the way out to her car. Jamie lagged behind, making no attempt to catch up or
to join in with their conversation. Bryden jumped into the front passenger seat, earning a scowl from Jamie who climbed into the back seat and then leaned back and shut his eyes as if to cover his mood behind a shield of exhaustion.

Julia drove home trying to fight off the urge to tackle Jamie on h
is rudeness and sullen manner, but she knew it would inflame the situation. It could not be connected to anything she had said or done, so she shouldn’t take it personally. But it was hard not to be hurt, particularly as she had been looking forward to their arrival for weeks.

When they arrive
d home, Jamie and Bryden took their bags up to their rooms. Bryden came downstairs straight away and headed for the fridge. He opened the door and peered in at the contents and grinned appreciatively. He then inspected the contents of the slow cooker, which was bubbling away contentedly in the corner. Next he lifted the cover from the cakes Julia had made early that morning and smiled.

‘Someone’s been busy!’

‘Thought you two might need feeding up over the holiday.’

Bryden opened a drawer and took out a packet
of crisps and stood by the sink munching them cheerfully. Julia was relieved at least one of her sons seemed happy.

‘What’s happening tonight?’

‘Nothing really. I made dinner already as you can see. I was hoping we could all catch up this evening. But I’m not sure now…’ Julia tilted her head in the direction of Jamie’s bedroom.

Bryden pulled a face and shook his head. He screwed up the empty crisp packet and chucked it into the bin and walked back to the sink to wash his hands.

‘I was hoping we could go round to Granny Alice’s house. You can show me what you’ve been doing to it.’

‘It’s dark now.’ Julia said, surprised at his interest.

‘So? It still has electricity and light bulbs doesn’t it?’

‘Of course.’

‘Come on then; let’s go out for a drive. There’s something I wanted to tell you and I can do without Mr Happy butting in.’

‘OK, but we’d better tell him we’
re going out.’

Just as Julia spoke,
they heard footsteps above them and a moment later Jamie came downstairs. He scowled at Bryden who ignored him and reached for a glass and went to the fridge to get some juice.

‘Can I borrow your car please?’
Jamie said.

‘Um, well we were just about to go out actually. We won’t be long though.’

‘That figures!’ Jamie replied, glaring at Bryden.

‘Where were you going anyway?’ Julia said, looking from one son to the other, wondering what was going on between them.

‘I was going to meet Liam in town for a drink. I’ll probably stay over at his tonight.’

‘Oh, well in that case you
definitely can’t take the car. I need to go out first thing in the morning. I have to go and collect the turkey from the butchers. But I’m sure we could drop you off.’

‘It’s OK
.’ Jamie strode off towards the lounge and seconds later they heard him talking to someone on his mobile.

Julia was impatient to find out what was going on so she picked up her handbag and keys and unhooked her coat from the rack in the hall.

‘Come on then,’ she said to Bryden, who instantly put down his glass and followed her out to the car, not bothering to put a coat on.

Bryden fastened the seat belt and then sighed dramatically.

Julia started the car and set off up the hill back towards the main road. ‘So tell me; what is going on with you two?’

‘It’s kind of complicated. Can I tell you when we get to the house?’

Julia drove on in silence; Alice’s house was less than two miles away and a few minutes later they pulled up outside.

She opened the
front door and turned the lights on and Bryden followed her inside.

‘What a difference! I can’t believe it’s th
e same house. The new kitchen is brilliant,’ Bryden said, as he walked around the downstairs of the property. He seemed genuinely impressed and Julia smiled gratefully. Nobody else had visited the house yet, so this was the first reaction from someone who knew what it had been like when Alice lived in it. They went upstairs and Bryden admired the new bathroom and the paint colours in the two bedrooms.

They went downstairs again and Bryden went back to the kitchen. He leaned against one of the cupboards and looked at Julia.

‘I have some news; at least I might have some news. It isn’t certain yet.’

‘Good news I hope,’ Julia replied.

‘That depends; Jamie doesn’t think so.’ Bryden took a deep breath before continuing. ‘I’ve just applied for Dad’s old job. It was re-advertised a few weeks ago as they didn’t manage to fill it earlier in the year. I found out yesterday they want to interview me.’

‘Oh, wow,’ Julia said, ‘I wasn’t expecting that.’

She stared at Bryden who seemed to be expecting disappointment. He chewed his thumb, a gesture that reminded Julia of when he was a child.

‘Do you mind?’

‘What? Why would I mind? You would be coming back to Shetland. I would be delighted.’

‘I just thought you might think it was a bit strange. Jamie was horrified.
It’s one of the reasons why he’s so pissed off with me.’

‘Well I suppose it is a little unexpected. I thought you would stay in Edinburgh for a few more years. I never expected eith
er of you to come back so soon, if ever. But are you sure? You’re not just doing this because of me, are you?’

‘Because of you? No; I miss Shetland
, and I thought about applying for the job the first time it was advertised but I was only half way through my probation, so I didn’t think I would stand a chance. But when they re-advertised I rang the Head and asked whether she thought she would consider an application from me. She said yes. She seemed really pleased actually. I mean, I know I might not get it, but I feel like I have a good chance.’

Julia smiled and put her arms around him and hugged him.

‘Your dad would have been so proud of you. He said you’d be after his job one day.’

Julia let go of him and stood back and thought for a second.

‘So what’s wrong with Jamie?’

‘Where do I start?’ Bryden stuffed his hands into his jeans pocket and looked down at the floor. ‘He has been a bit off since I went over to Sicily. He made some comment about me sponging off you and getting a free holiday.
Which was stupid, because he was invited too, wasn’t he?’

Julia nodded.

‘He’s still fed up because I’ve got Dad’s car, and his golf clubs. And now I’ve applied for Dad’s old job he’s really mad at me. He said I won’t stop until I’ve got everything. I think he’s jealous for some reason.’

‘Jealous? I would have thought his career
prospects would have meant you would have envied him.’

Bryden shrugged, as if to acknowledge this might have been the case at one time.

‘The thing is I don’t think he’s enjoying his work. I met him a few weeks ago after he had been working in A&E. He’d been dealing with a horrible car accident. Some little kid died and Jamie just couldn’t cope with it.’

Julia nodded; she understood exactly how Jamie would have felt. She had experienced similar incidences when she had been a nurse. She felt sick for her
son and wished he had shared this with her. She might have been able to help him.

‘It takes a lot of getting used to,’ she said.

‘Anyway, the reason he’s not speaking to me now is because when we were waiting at Edinburgh airport I mentioned to him I was going to ask you if I could move into this house if I got the job in Shetland.’

‘Oh!
So that’s why you were in such a hurry to see it.’

‘Well that, and I wanted to talk to you about everything without Jamie being around.’

‘OK, well in theory, yes you could live here. It makes sense; after all you’re an adult now and you don’t need me ironing your shirts and cooking your dinner anymore.’

‘Hey, steady on, I never said you couldn’t cook my dinner!’ B
ryden said, lightening the mood a little.

‘But
I don’t want to upset Jamie. He’s having a tough time at the moment and I can see how everything looks from his point of view. We need to make sure he feels you’re both being treated equally.’

‘I could give him Dad’s car.’

‘No, I don’t think that would work. He won’t be impressed with getting it back just because you don’t want it anymore.’

‘But I do want it.’

Julia shook her head.

‘It’s going to take more than a car. Let me think about this. Anyway, it’s cold in here, let’s go back to the house and have
dinner. Don’t say anything to Jamie about what we talked about.’

When they got back home Liam’s car was parked outside. They found him talking to Jamie in the kitchen. Jamie had his coat on and they looked like they were just leaving.

‘Hello Liam, I haven’t seen you for ages. How are you?’ Julia asked, giving him a little hug as she entered the kitchen.

‘I’m great, thanks
. I’m working most of Christmas, so we’re going out tonight. Hope you don’t mind me taking Jamie out when he’s only just got home.’

‘Don’t be silly. We’ve got plenty of time to catch up later, haven’t we?’ Julia replied, looking pointedly at Jamie, who had the gr
ace to smile at her. ‘Aren’t your parents going away for Christmas this year?’ Julia said to Liam.

‘They’ve gone to Tenerife for two weeks. I couldn’t get the time off to go with them.’

‘Oh that’s a shame. Where are you going to have your Christmas dinner then?’

‘It’ll be a turkey sandwich in the stat
ion if I’m lucky,’ Liam replied, smiling grimly.

‘What time will you finish that day?’

‘Not until six. But it’s no big deal; I don’t mind.’

‘Nonsense. Come round here after
work. We’ll have our dinner in the evening this year.’

‘Really?’ Liam said, looking at Jamie to see his reaction.

‘Of course. I never like eating a big meal in the middle of the day anyway; you just want to fall asleep in the afternoon. And it will be great to see you,’ Julia said.

‘Well if you’re sure.’

‘Yeah, and you should stay over; then you can have a dram.’

After Jamie and Liam had left, Bryden talked some more about why he wanted to move back to Shetland and about how much he was enjoying teaching. He also divulged more information about Jamie’s experiences of working in the hospital, which did not fill Julia with ease.

Bryden
was tired and wanted to have an early night. After he said goodnight, Julia decided she would go upstairs and read in bed. She walked past Jamie’s room and noticed there was a light flashing on the bed. She switched on his bedroom light and saw he had left his laptop plugged in. She switched it off at the wall, as she hated to leave electrical devices on unnecessarily. She noticed Jamie had not unpacked his bag; it looked like all he had done in his room was lie down on the bed, as the duvet was crumpled in the middle. She turned to leave and then noticed the duty free bag was in the bin and the box holding the vodka had been opened. She picked it up and saw the box had been ripped open in such a way it would not make much of a present. She took out the bottle and was shocked to see it had been opened and quite a lot of vodka had been drunk already.