Leave it to Eva (11 page)

Chapter Seventeen

R
uby, Jenny and I stood on the doorstep like we’d been turned to cold, stone statues of ourselves.

This didn’t make any sense.

How could Patrick be married?

How could he have a wife and baby?

How could he be playing happy families here in London, while Kate, his real family, was all alone in Ireland?

Just then a door opened at the back of the house, and a man walked along the corridor towards us.

His hair and his face had both got thinner,
but even so, I was certain that I was looking at Kate’s dad.

He was smiling at us, like he was perfectly innocent, like he’d done nothing wrong in his whole life.

‘What’s going on out here, Zoe?’ he said. ‘I’ve made Simon’s tea, and it’ll be going cold.’

While he spoke, he gently stroked the baby’s hair, and the baby gazed at him adoringly.

Suddenly I felt like screaming.

How dare he love this baby, when right now, Kate was probably lying on my bed sobbing her heart out because she had to go and live with strangers?

I grabbed the photograph from Zoe’s hand and shoved it into my pocket, not caring that I was crumpling it up and ruining it.

‘There’s something I’d like to tell you,’ I said to Patrick.

I wasn’t sure what exactly I was going to say, but I knew it wasn’t going to be nice.

Jenny must have guessed that I wasn’t going to be very diplomatic. She smiled at Zoe.

‘Do you think you could excuse us for just a minute?’ she said. ‘There’s something we need to say to Patrick.’ Zoe gave us a funny look, but she didn’t move. ‘It’s about astronomy,’ said Jenny quickly. ‘My sister and her friend want to interview amateur astronomers for their school magazine. You could listen if you like, but you’d probably be totally bored, and we’d feel bad if the baby’s tea got cold.’

Zoe started to turn away, but then she turned back again. ‘So how come you’ve got a photograph of Patrick?’ she asked.

There was a long silence.

I looked at Ruby and Ruby looked at Jenny, and the baby laughed like this was all very funny.

‘It’s kind of a long story,’ I said. ‘You see …….’

I stopped and Jenny must have guessed that I had no idea what to say next.

‘You see, my third cousin, Seamus, was in
school with Patrick, years ago, in Ireland,’ she said. ‘And when we said we were coming here, Seamus found this photo in an old album, and he said it would be funny to bring it along. So we did.’

‘Seamus who?’ asked Patrick.

Jenny smiled at him, ‘Seamus Murphy. But you might not remember him. It was a long time ago, and cousin Seamus is a forgettable kind of guy.’

By now Zoe must have been tired of talking about long-lost friends called Seamus. ‘I’ll go in back and feed Simon,’ she said. ‘You guys take all the time you need.’

Then she went into a room at the back of the house, closing the door behind her.

For a minute no one said anything. Patrick stood there calmly, with his arms folded. He was probably expecting some not-very-exciting
questions about galaxies and telescopes. Clearly he had
nooooo
idea what was coming next. I’d have felt sorry for him – except that I was angrier than I had ever been in my entire life.

I was afraid to open my mouth. I felt like there was a volcano simmering inside me. I was sure that if I said a single word to Patrick, it would trigger an explosion that I could never manage to control.

Then I remembered the other photograph in the envelope. It was a really nice one that I’d taken of Kate next to her special tree the summer before. I took out the photograph and handed it to Patrick. He looked at it for a long, long time. Then he covered his face with his hands.

When at last he spoke, his voice was totally weird – all hoarse and croaky.

‘That’s Kate,’ he said. ‘My Kate.’

‘Yes,’ I said. ‘You got it in one. That’s Kate – your daughter. I’m surprised you even remember her name.’

‘But who are you?’ he asked. ‘Why are you here? Has something happened? Is Kate all right?’

Now I couldn’t hold back my anger any more. ‘How could she possibly be all right? You ran out on her! What kind of evil, horrible father does that? How could––?’

I knew I was shouting, and I didn’t care.

Jenny put her hand on my arm. ‘Being angry isn’t really going to help Kate,’ she said. ‘Why don’t you just explain to Patrick exactly why you’re here?’

I knew she was right, so I took a few deep breaths and tried to calm myself. Ruby squeezed my hand, almost like by doing so she could give me some of her strength.

Even so, I knew already that it wasn’t going to work. Patrick had moved on, and there was no room for Kate in his cosy new life.

Still, though, I owed it to Kate to try, so, in a cold voice, I told Patrick all about Martha – his
own mother – getting sick. He looked worried for a second, but relaxed when I said that all she needed was a few months’ rest. Then I went on to tell him about the social workers and the foster care and everything.

‘Poor Kate,’ he said when I was finished. ‘My poor, poor little girl.’

He spoke so gently that, for one moment, I dared to think that there might be some hope.

‘Kate doesn’t want to live with a foster family,’ I said. ‘She wants to stay in her own home, and you’re the only one who can make that happen. You need to go back to Seacove and stay there with her. It’ll only be for a few months. After that, Martha will be better, so you can leave if you want to. But you probably won’t want to, once you get to know Kate again. She’s amazing. She’s smart and funny and––’

Just then the sound of the baby’s crying drifted towards us from the back of the house. Patrick turned and looked over his shoulder nervously,
and suddenly I understood.

‘Zoe knows nothing about your life in Ireland, does she?’ I said. ‘I bet she doesn’t even know that Kate exists.’

Patrick didn’t reply, but his guilty face told me all I needed to know.

I felt like shoving past him and running in to tell Zoe the truth.

Why did she deserve to live happily ever after while poor Kate had so little?

Once again Jenny read my mind.

‘Let it go, Eva,’ she said. ‘It’s not your secret to tell. And none of this is Zoe’s fault anyway.’

I knew she was right. I forced myself to forget about Zoe and baby Simon, and I glared at Patrick.

‘Kate is your daughter. What are you going to do to help her?’

Suddenly he looked old and weary.

‘It’s not easy,’ he said. ‘I can’t just walk away from my family.’

‘Why not?’ I said, angry again. ‘You did it once before.’

He flinched, almost like I’d hit him.

‘And that’s exactly why I can’t do it again,’ he said. ‘I’m not a monster. I know how much I must have hurt Kate, so I can’t do the same to anyone else.’

‘But what about Kate? She hasn’t gone away. She needs you. You can’t just ignore that.’

‘I’m starting a new job soon,’ he said. ‘And things won’t be so tight financially. I’ll be able to send Kate some money.’

‘Money!’ I almost spat the word at him. ‘She needs more than money. She needs a father.’

‘You’re young,’ he said. ‘You don’t understand yet just how complicated things can get when you are older. You see—’

‘I can see one thing very clearly,’ I said. ‘And it’s that I’m wasting my time. We’re leaving – and don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. I won’t tell Kate about your new family. It would
hurt her too much, and she sooo doesn’t deserve that.’

As I walked down the short driveway, Ruby and Jenny walked beside me, like bodyguards.

Then when I got to the gate, I stopped and looked back. I realised that I absolutely didn’t need bodyguards. Patrick was leaning against the doorway, looking sad and old and defeated.

A kinder person than me might have felt sorry for him, but I needed all my sympathy for Kate.

‘Know what?’ I shouted back at him. ‘Kate’s much better off without you.’

He looked ashamed, but still he turned and went inside, closing the door firmly behind him.

That evening, Andrea brought us to a park near Jenny’s flat. He spread a huge rug on the grass, and Jenny, Ruby and I stretched ourselves out in the still-warm sunshine.

‘Don’t go away,’ he said. ‘I’ll be back in twenty minutes.’

Jenny turned to me. ‘I’m sorry things didn’t turn out better today, Eva,’ she said.

‘Me too,’ I said.

‘But you did your best, so don’t feel bad. And now you should try to enjoy your last evening in London.’

I knew she was right, but I wasn’t sure I could take her advice. Was it fair of me to enjoy anything, when my friend’s life was such a mess?

Then Andrea came back carrying a huge wicker basket and a guitar.

‘All my grandmother’s favourite recipes,’ he said, as he unpacked tubs of pasta and salad and warm garlic bread.

We ate until every scrap was finished, and then Andrea started to play his guitar. A young couple sat down near us, and the girl started to sing along to Andrea’s music, and I lay in the sunshine and thought that this had to be the
best place in the whole world.

Much later, when we were packing up to go home, Andrea dragged Ruby over to the couple.

‘This is Ruby Miller,’ he said. ‘You don’t know her yet, but one day she is going to be a champion swimmer. Maybe you should get her autograph now, before the rush.’

Everyone laughed and Ruby went totally red, but she was smiling too.

‘Andrea’s lovely,’ I whispered to Jenny.

‘I know,’ she said, with a dreamy look on her face.

‘What am I missing?’ asked Andrea coming over.

‘Oh, just a family secret,’ said Jenny, and she gave me a big long hug.

Chapter Eighteen

W
hen we walked through the arrivals area the next morning, Ruby covered her eyes.

‘OMG!’ she said.

I looked through the glass door to see Mum and Ruby’s mum waiting for us. Maggie was waving a beautiful hand-stitched flag.
WELL DONE, RUBY!
it said, in shiny gold letters. On her shirt she was wearing a huge badge that said
My Daughter is a Swimming Star.

‘How totally embarrassing is that?’ asked Ruby.

I giggled. ‘She’s just proud of you.’

‘Well, I wish she could be proud of me in a more subtle way,’ she said.

We walked through the doors, and spent ages hugging and kissing and talking about the swimming trials.

‘You will never know just how proud you have made me, Ruby,’ said Maggie after a while.

Ruby looked at me and I knew what she was thinking.

I shook my head – there was no need for Maggie to know the finer points of what had happened at the swimming trial. But Ruby has a stubborn, honest streak.

‘I nearly didn’t get the scholarship,’ she said. ‘I nearly threw it all away at the last minute.’

The smile faded from Maggie’s face. ‘What happened?’ she asked.

Before Ruby could answer, I spoke for her.

‘She just got a bit nervous, that’s all. It wasn’t a big deal.’

‘It
was
a big deal,’ said Ruby. ‘It was a
very
big
deal. My swimming trial was a total disaster.’

‘But you still got through, didn’t you?’ asked Maggie.

‘Yes, but only because of Eva,’ said Ruby. ‘She was totally brilliant. She talked to me and then she talked to the coach and persuaded her to give me another chance. If it weren’t for Eva, I would never, ever have got the scholarship.’

I looked at Maggie, and felt a sudden flash of pity. She was going to be so lonely when Ruby packed up and left for London. On long, dark winter nights, was she going to hate me?

Even though I’d done exactly as she asked?

But then Maggie beamed and stretched up and hugged me. It was almost like she could read my mind.

‘I’m going to miss Ruby so much,’ she said. ‘But missing her is nothing compared to how proud I am of her. I am so very happy that she’s got this wonderful opportunity. Thank you, Eva. You are quite simply amazing.’

Her words made me embarrassed at first, and then, as the embarrassment faded, I began to feel cross.

If I was so amazing, how come I couldn’t do a single thing to help Kate?

Mum dropped Maggie and Ruby home, and then we continued our journey to Seacove.

‘Kate’s going to visit a possible foster family tomorrow,’ said Mum as we drove.

‘Poor Kate,’ I said. ‘I bet it’s going to be like an
X-Factor
audition. How long does she get to impress the family? If they don’t like what they see, do they get to say mean stuff about her? Do they tell her to go home and try again next year?’

‘You’re just being silly, Eva,’ said Mum. ‘You know it’s not like that. Nicola and Tom have worked very hard to find a lovely family that will welcome Kate. I’m quite sure they’ll do
everything they can to make her happy.’

I knew Mum was right, but that didn’t stop me from feeling terribly sorry for Kate.

‘How is she?’ I asked, not sure I wanted to hear the answer.

‘Oh, you know,’ said Mum in the end. ‘Kate’s busy being Kate.’

And then, before I could stop myself, I told Mum the story of the search for Kate’s dad, and what a total waste of time the whole thing had been.

When I stopped talking, Mum was strangely quiet. I looked across and saw that her eyes were glistening with tears.

‘Eva, that’s so sweet of you,’ she said.

‘Yeah, sweet and useless,’ I said. ‘I didn’t achieve anything.’

‘But you tried,’ said Mum. ‘You did your best and that’s what counts.’

‘It doesn’t do anything to help Kate, though, does it?’

Mum sighed. ‘Sometimes problems are just too big, Eva. Sometimes there’s nothing at all you can do.’

That was a really horrible thought, so I turned up the radio, closed my eyes and tried not to dread meeting Kate again.

When we got to the house, Kate came out to meet us. She was wearing a really nice top, and new jeans that Mum had bought for her. Mum had taken her to the hairdressers too, so her hair had a really cool cut.

‘You look great,’ I said. ‘And Mum says you’re going to see a family tomorrow.

Kate smiled at me, but it was an empty, brittle smile, like the last pathetic spark in a dying fire.

‘Let’s not talk about that now,’ she said. ‘Tell me all about London instead. I want to hear every single detail.’

That immediately set up a barrier between us.

How could I tell her every single detail of my trip?

How could I tell her about my stupid, stupid search for her stupid, stupid dad?

So I told her all about Ruby and the swimming trials, and the fun we’d had with Jenny, and about how cute and nice Andrea was.

And all the time I was talking, I had the horrible, weird fear that I was somehow going to blurt out the awful truth –
I met your dad, and he rejected you all over again.