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“This could be a huge mistake.’

“It’s not.”

“How do you know?”

“There’s no one else on this earth who knows me better. I’d trust you not only with my life but that of my children. I’m not granting anyone else that privilege, ever.” We could sit here and debate this back and forth, but the proof is in her reaction to me. Liv is anything, but a push over, but she melts in my arms like butter.

“Let me show you until you’re confident that you’re mine.”

I cup her ass, and she wraps her legs around my waist to stay in position.

“This is how I know.” I nibble my way down her neck. She tilts her head, giving me access. “And this.” Her skin is salty sweet. I suck it into my mouth, marking her.

“I can’t lose you,” she croaks.

“You won’t.”

“You can’t promise me that.”

I rest my forehead against hers. “Have I ever broken a promise to you.”

“No.”

“Why would I start now?” I ask.

“Cause me and love don’t mix. As much as I want to do this with you—.”

“Shh.” I peck her lips. “You’re not ready yet. I get it. We can go as slow as you want, but this thing between us is going to happen. We already opened the door. There’s no closing it and pretending to be blind.”

She rests her head on my chest, and I allow myself a few more moments to enjoy her like this, soft and pliant. She’s a force to be reckoned with. It’s humbling to hold the hell cat in my arms like this. The back door opens, and I lower her to the ground. She steps away from me and straightens her clothing. I quickly adjust my dick. I’m getting intimately reacquainted with a constant erection. I might as well be a high school teen the way she keeps me ready to blow my load.

“Dishes are done. You coming into play a few rounds of board games before we head to our place?” Braedon asks.

“Yeah, we’re coming.” I place my hand on the small of her back and guide her toward the house the rightness of this pushes me further away from my apprehension. I’m done letting my past determine my future.

Chapter Three

Liv

“Hold still,” Efia says as she smooths down the wax strips over my eyes. There are a number of perks to having a best friend who's a makeup artist and licensed and esthetician. I close my eyes and try to force my muscles to relax. We’re doing our monthly spa day. A habit we started in college. I think it’s more to make me presentable to be seen around town with her. With her, insanely high cheek bones wide-set light brown eyes, full lips, and maple colored flawless skin, she looks like the models she often works with. The dimples in both cheeks take her beauty over the top. There was a time I envied her before I was comfortable in my own skin.

Now I admire her dedication to her craft, and herself. She rips off the strip making me wince. There’s no other person I’d trust my eyebrows to.

“You’re incredibly tense right now. Is work still running you ragged.”

“They are. We’re this close to finishing our current project, though, so I’m counting down the days.”

“So it’s not the day job?” She smooths down my eyebrows with a brush and moves on to the smalls scissors.

“It’s Houston.”

“Is everything okay with the kids?” Efia asks concerned.

“Oh, they’re fine. This issue is strictly between him and me.”

“Did you have a fight? It’s not like you two to let things go unresolved for too long.”

“That’s not it. If you ask him, nothing’s wrong. I’m the one with doubts.”

“About?” She

“Us.”

“Wait. Us as  in two become one?”

“If he has his way.” 

“Girl, you got that sexy bearded beast and you don’t want him? Please send him my way. He takes care of his business, bills, and treats you like a queen. And that was as his best friend.”

I huff. “You’re on his side?”

“I’d rather be under him.”

“Ef, I’m serious.”

“So am I. Damn. You’re not attracted to him?” She asks skeptically.

“I am. It’s not that. I feel like I’m a convenience. I’m here, and I’m safe. How long until he decides I’m not what he needs?”

“Houston never struck me as the type of man who doesn’t know his  mind.”

“No, but we’re damaged goods. What are they odds that we’d move on together?” I ask.

“Considering you’re practically married in everything but name and the swapping of bodily fluids, I’d say high.”

“Gross.”

“Hot, sweaty, smex is what you need. You haven’t been dicked down since that waste of sperm and egg. I think it’s way past time you broke your unspoken vow of chastity.”

“That’s not what being alone was about. I needed to ground myself and rediscover who I was. What happened was a wake-up call. I’d been doing everything for Tony and getting virtually nothing back. He wasn’t even that good in bed.”

“Ugh. Useless,” Ef hisses.

I smile. “He was. I can’t believe how much time I wasted waiting  for him to get his stuff together because I thought he had potential.”

“Potential doesn’t pay bills, make a good husband or a decent father,” Ef says.

“I know that now.”

“So why continue the drought? You’re good on your own. You have your swank condo, a great job, a nice car, and a sense of self that makes you one of the strongest women I know. If you’re not ready for a relationship now, then when?”

She rips off another layer of fabric, and I wince. “Never?”

“No. I refuse to let you walk away from the man I believe is your soulmate. What you did, stepping up and mothering those children is above and beyond godmother duties.”

“He’s my best friend.”

“Yes, and they make the best lovers.”

“It’s not that easy.”

She clucks her tongue and continues whipping my eyebrows into shape. “You’re making it harder than it needs to be. Sit up.”

I sit up from the table she put up for my visit and take the silver handled hand mirror from her. “Look in the mirror.” I study my reflections admiring the sharp points of my newly groomed eyebrows.

“They look awesome.”

“Of course, they do. What do you see?”

I study my reflection. My eyes are full of anxiety, and my lips are turned down. “ I see I’m stressed.”

“Houston,” I smile. “If the very thought of him does that to you. That’s all you need to know.”

“Damnit, Ef.”

“You can thank me, by making me maid of honor at your wedding.”

“NO need to move at warp speed.”

“By my account, y’all are at least two years behind. Nothing about this will be slow.”

“You’re supposed to be helping me figure things out. His birthday is tomorrow, and I have to show my face.”

“I’ll help you by taking you to the mall so you can pick out some new lingerie for you future boo.”

“Is this where you ignore my reality and insert you own?”

“No, this is where I give you the truth wither you want to hear it or not. That’s your man. Has been for a long time now. It takes more than copulation to cement a relationship.”

“Now you sound like him,” I mumble.

Ef laughs. “Knew I liked him for a reason.”

“I can’t wait until you finally get into a serious relationship.”

“Oh no, I like my life unpredictable and fancy free, babe. When someone books me. I like being able to jump on a plane, into a car, without a thought about anyone else. I don’t even own a fish. What the hell would I do with an entire person?” Ef asks looking genuinely disgusted.

Her lip and nose curl up as if she’s discovered a rancid item in the fridge.

“People aren’t pets. Ef. Unless, you’re into that type of thing. I never judge.”

“Girl, please. I have enough problems making choices for myself.” I laugh. “Do you feel better at least?” she asks.

“Yes?”

“You’re impossible, you know that?” she snatches the mirror from me and lays it on a small wooden table. “Come, let me ply you with wine, pluck you for more information, and help you decide what you’re wearing to see Houston tomorrow. Mama is going to get you laid.”

“Ugh, Ef. I need an impartial third party.”

“Whenever have I ever not had an opinion?” she asks.

“Point taken,” I say as I climb from the bench and follow her out to the kitchen. She reaches into the fridge and pulls out a bottle of Moscato. She pops the cork while I pull down two wine glasses. The hand painted stemware is a reminder of a weekend trip we took. I set them down.

“What did you get your boo for his birthday anyway?” she asks as I pour the wine.

“A man crate.”

“Come again?” The looked confusion on her face makes me laugh.

“A man crate. They’re this insanely intelligent company that makes crates for men. They have things from beer brews to witling sets, and video game boxes.”

“What kind did you get him?”

“I got him a shaving crate. It has all the essentials, beard oil, shaving cream, brush, razor, and shaving soap. I know he’s almost out of a lot of that.”

“See that right there.” She points to me. “That’s wifely duties.”

“Buying him something he’ll use?”

“Knowing that he needs refills on his grooming products.”

I open my mouth and close it. I have no rebuttal for that. She’s right. I knew because I was putting away laundry and happened to see the nearly empty bottle on his dresser.

“Pour me a full glass,” I say as the truth hits me. We crossed the line from friends to something gray and unexplored a long time ago. The time has come to start adding definition. I can’t hide the flutter of anticipation in my stomach. Firm soft, and talented enough to charm the britches off the preacher’s daughter, his lips are a lethal weapon. His calloused hands are warm, and he makes me feel small and fragile. I’m pushing six feet, and a solid one-hundred-and-sixty pounds. It’s a rare feeling.  I wonder if he’ s big all over. The bulge I felt pressed against my belly has me thinking the answer is yes.

I take a healthy gulp of my wine. Like the moon with the tides, I’m being pulled by a force greater than myself toward an inevitable event.

***

“Did you wear this for me?” Houston asks. I shift my weight from one candy red heeled foot to the other. It took Efia and me an hour to come up with the scoop neck black dress I’ve accessorized with a red belt. It’s a little fancier than I usually go, but it’s not over the top.

“A girl, can’t dress nicely?” I ask cocking my hip to the side. He’s wearing a pair of dark denim jeans that hug his firm thighs and tight ass. A white button up is covered by a gray vest with dark brown buttons that match his belt and shoes. I love the dapper style he has. The wallet change hanging out of his pocket lends a modern edge that has me pressing my thighs together to relieve the pressure building between my legs.

“Kitten, you can do whatever you want.” The pet name sends heat rushing to my cheeks.  He places his fingers under my chin and forces me to meet his gaze. “You look beautiful.”

“Thank you. You’re quite handsome.” I clear my throat.  “Where is everyone?”

“Kids are with Mom and Dad for the evening. They’ll see them off to school.”

“Why?” I asked shocked.

“The only thing I wanted for my birthday was time alone with you.”

“Hous.” His honesty floors me.

“I set up a few things.”

“It’s your birthday. I should be surprising you.”

“You in that dress and those fuck me heels are gift enough.” My jaw drops. I’m not used to this side of him. It’s masculine, frank, and keeping my panties drenched. “Let me take that from you.” He takes the box from me and sets it on the table. “Come on.” He grabs my hand and laces our fingers. His romantic gestures are water after a drought. I want to drink them down and ask for a refill. As he leads me outside, the reasons for my hesitation drift further away.

The backyard is transformed. A cream colored cushion rests against the large oak tree. A few feet from a white ply board he’s secured to run movies on with a projector. Wicker basket lights and a string of small white lights are wound around the tree adding light in the darkness. Bowls of popcorn and a bucket of beer rest beside the cushions. Green fire flies flicker, greeting us in the summer evening.

“My mom might have helped with the decorations. I wanted to do something more than take you to a movie where we couldn’t even talk.”

“You did good,” I whisper, tightening my grip to squeeze his hand.

The boyish grin he directs at me weakens my knees. I’m seeing him in a new light, and it’s addicting. I want to see more of the sweetness he lost return.

“What do you want to do first?” I ask

He raises an eyebrow. “You sure you want to ask me that.”

“Houston.” I look away unable to hold his heated gaze. His wicked chuckle makes me think of the massive espresso colored King size bed in his room. “I set up our favorite, Dracula.”

“You don’t want your present first?”

“Oh, believe me, I have it. The question is, can I open it?”

He gently tangles his fingers in my curls and massages my scalp. I purr like the cat he’s nicknamed me for. I go boneless and lean against him, soaking in the warmth and delicious scent unique to him. He places feather light kisses down the side of my face.  His lips ghost over mine. His tongue teases the corners of my mouth. I part my lips eager for more. He moves away traveling down my neck. His nibbles on my pulse point make me moan. Tease. Two can play this game. I lightly trail my nails down his neck. He shudders.

“Houston?”

“Mmhmm.”

“I’m going to need you to give me your mouth.”

He looks up. His bushy eyebrows raise, and I giggle. His lips smash against mine, and our tongues get reacquainted. I suck on his tongue, hungry for more of him. His massive hands manipulate my ass like he’s working the dough for bread. My nipples strain against the silk bra. The ache in my center spreads throughout my body. His soft beard tickles my face, adding another layer of stimulation. I’m a mass of want and arousal.

Breathing heavily, he turns the full weight of his stormy eyes on me. He must be a magician because I’m powerless to resist the pull. I frame his face with my hands and study the sincere expression of the man who makes me feel so many different things. He's my best friend. The person who knows all my secrets, comforts me when I’m at my lowest, and has my trust above all others.
I love him. But am I in love with him?
I could weigh the pros and cons all night. In the end, there’s only one way to find out. I place a gentle kiss on his lips.

My heart pumps blood faster, and my core temperature sky rockets. My eyelids drift closed of their own accord, and I incline my head seeking more.
He’s goodness personified. My savior at my darkest hour. How can this be a mistake?

He groans, and pries our lips apart. “You sure you’re ready for this, Kitten? Cause once I start, I’m not going to be able to stop.” The fact that he stopped to ask me, quiets my qualms. “I want tonight with you.” I can’t promise him anything, so I remain silent, letting my body talk for me.