Left Together (27 page)

“I
won’t be far if you change your mind.”

“Thanks,”
I say and head down the hallway to the room I haven’t entered in a few weeks.

The
dust I wiped up has returned and the way these ribs are feeling, it won’t get
cleaned again anytime soon. Without stopping, I walk through the sitting area
and push open the double doors that lead to my grandmother’s bedroom. The light
coming into the large space isn’t as bright this time of day, giving the room a
comforting atmosphere. For the first time since the night she left me, I round
the oversized bed to climb in on my side. A moment or two passes before I’m
able to relax without too much complaining from the broken bones. Facing the
spot where she should be, I ask, “What the hell, Gram?” Silence is the only
response I get. What would she think of this if she was here? There’s no way
she could have known. She never would have left without giving me some type of
clue or telling me something.

One by
one, thoughts start popping into my head. Sophia Foster is not my mother.
There’s no point in clarifying it by saying she’s not my
biological
mother. The bitch has never been any kind of maternal figure whatsoever. It’s
her fault I grew up the way I did. For the most part, I was neglected. She
obviously blames me for her husband’s screw up. Who the fuck takes out anger on
an innocent child? How could I have possibly been the one who deserved to be
treated that way? It’s because of her that I wasn’t ever given the chance to know
my real mom. Whether or not Kristen would’ve wanted anything to do with me is
irrelevant at this point.

Then
my mind decides to switch gears and targets my father. How the hell could he
sit back and watch while that fucking bitch tried to destroy his child every
damn day? Not only did he allow her to do it, but he usually joined in. Did he
ever stop and consider the fact that, just maybe, I’d be better off if he sent
me to live with the woman who actually gave birth to me, rather than have me
around the one who pretended to? I’m completely baffled at why the payoff
didn’t go the other way. Why didn’t they give Kristen the money to disappear
prior to the day I was born, signing a contract relinquishing her rights to
ever contact the family to help support me? Would she have taken that deal?
Wouldn’t that have made a hell of a lot more sense than having me around every
day as reminder of how Sam fucked up?

And
what about Kristen? I can’t even begin to fathom what the hell I would do in
her shoes. At age nineteen, I lived on my own far away from home, but the
emotional and financial support from Gram was only a phone call away. My days
were occupied with classes and homework, while my nights were filled with
friends and parties. I only had myself to worry about. Having a baby never was,
nor will be, in my plans. For my eighteenth birthday, I gave myself the gift of
an IUD. I sucked at remembering to take a pill every day, getting a shot every
few months is too much work, not to mention that needles make me sick, and I
don’t have much faith in condoms alone. There was absolutely no chance of
heading down that road.

So,
how do I feel about the fact that Kristen left me to Sam and Sophia? I don’t
really have an answer to that. Honestly, I may never have one. There’s no way
of knowing what was going on in her life at the time. It would be so easy to
judge her based solely on how she left me, but that’s not fair. She was
obviously unemployed. How could she keep a baby without income or a home? I do
have plenty of questions, though. Did she care about me, even if the only time
we had together was while she carried me? What did she think when she had me?
Would she be proud or disappointed in how I turned out? If she was older, if
she was more stable in life, would she have kept me and raised me on her own?
Has she thought about me since? What’s she like? Do we have anything in common?
Does she remember my birthday? Where is she? Did she have any more kids? What
does she do? My curiosity continues to search for things I’d like to know, but
I have to stop because I’ll never have the opportunity to get the answers.

To get
my mind off of Kristen, I close my eyes and think of Gram. The last time we
were together, she promised that whenever I needed her, she’d be here.
“You
know, even when I’m asleep, I’ll still be here for you. I won’t ever miss one
thing. Graduation. Your wedding day. When you have a family of your own and all
the days in between. I’ll still be here, cheering you on, holding you when you
need me.”
Today is definitely one of those days.

Despite
the nap we took earlier, I feel myself drifting off to sleep. Right before I
do, a soft, cool breeze brushes over my cheek. There’s no need to open my eyes.
The room is empty. There are no windows open to let in the wind. My lips form
into a small smile because I know she’s keeping her promise. I know my
grandmother is here with me.

***

I
awake to see Evan leaning against the doorway, arms folded across his chest,
watching me. He had changed his clothes and did his hair. How long was I
asleep? The grin he gives me is enough to make me ashamed, but only because I’m
still in my grandmother’s room and shouldn’t be thinking such things. How does
he do this to me?

“Hey,
sleepyhead,” he whispers.

“Hey.”

“I
wasn’t sure if you didn’t come out yet because you were still thinking or
because you couldn’t move,” he teases.

“How
long have I been in here?”

“Over
two hours.”

“Oh
shit. I didn’t mean to sleep that long. I was just…”

“Resting
your eyes?” That’s what I always tell him when I accidentally fall asleep
trying to wait up for him to come home from work.

“Exactly,”
I say, smiling.

“You
know, Port Charlotte is only about an hour-and-a-half away. If I drive, I could
have you there in less time.”

“I
know where Port Charlotte is. Why would I want to go there?” He still forgets
I’ve been in Florida a lot longer than he has.

Evan
comes into the room. Right before he gets to the edge of the bed, he realizes
why I didn’t lie down on that side. He takes his time coming around to where I
am and sits down next to me, leaning against my legs. I’m only able to turn my
head. “I thought you’d want to go there because that’s where your mom lives.”

“Kristen
lives in Florida?” I assumed she would have taken off and put a hell of a lot
more distance between the Fosters and herself.

“Yup.”
His smile is encouraging, but I’ve already made up my mind about this.

“I’m
not going to see her.”

“Why
not?”

“She’s
lived all this time without me, Evan. She doesn’t need me popping into her life
at this stage in the game.” I reach out for him to help me get up. He assists
me without a word, but doesn’t get up when I do.

Holding
onto my hand, he keeps me in front of him. “You don’t know what she needs.” I
try to look away. “Kacie, I understand why you’d be apprehensive about getting
in touch with her, but don’t you think you should at least try?”

“No.”

“You’re
scared. I get it…”

“I’m
not scared. She’s been without me for twenty-two years. It would be a bad idea
to mess with her now. She’s moved on. I won’t interfere with her life.”

“Then
why did you ask Mary to get her out of the contract with your dad?”

“Because
I don’t want him to control her or anyone else for one more second. Not because
of me anyway.”

“I
think you’re full of shit,” he says, smirking. “You’re afraid of rejection.”

“No
more, okay?” My pouty face will make him feel bad.

“Hey.”
He brushes his thumb over my cheek. “Just think about it. For me?” I place my
lips on his as my promise to consider his ridiculous request. “Jade called. She
wants to know if you want to go out to eat, or go over to her house and order
something.” And just like that, the discussion is over. Evan takes my hand and
leads me toward the door, but I stop him and turn back to allow my eyes to
sweep over the room.

“Um…
Do you think, well…when my arm gets better, could you help me pack up some of
Gram’s things?” It’s a bitch to hold back the waterworks on this one, but I
know it’s time. I don’t have to forget her and I don’t have to stop loving her,
but I do have to move on. She would want me to. She would be really pissed off
that I haven’t already.

“Whenever
you’re ready,” he whispers.

***

I’m
not sure if Evan warned them or not, but when we went out to dinner with our
friends last night, no one mentioned my mother. It was nice to be out of the
house for a change. It made me feel human again. Being stuck inside and on the
sofa is really starting to get old, regardless of who sits with me or how many
movies they let me pick. Unfortunately, I still have a lot of healing to do,
but it was nice to have the break.

We’re
up early this morning. As the sun rises, someone calls Evan and he jumps out of
bed to answer. He takes the call out of the room, but I’m already up. It was
hard to keep my eyes closed all night since I was worried about what would
happen with my dad today. If he doesn’t sign the paper releasing Kristen from
the hold he’s held over her for the last two decades, I’m going to lose it and
could possibly end up getting arrested. It’s a good thing Mary is coming with
us. She’ll be my best chance at not getting locked up.

Evan
has been pacing from the living room to the foyer for the last twenty minutes
and he’s starting to drive me nuts. “What the hell are you doing?” I finally
ask from the kitchen table. Having to wait for Mary to let me know she’s ready
to go is more than I can handle at the moment. My brother already called and
said my dad has been staying in his office at the hospital, so that’s where we’re
going to meet. I don’t give a shit as to the reason why that is, either.

Before
Evan has the chance to answer me, the doorbell rings. His face lights up and he
takes off toward the door. I’m almost afraid to find out what has him acting
like a child, but I pull myself up from the chair and follow. I hear him
speaking to someone and, out of the corner of his eye, he catches me standing
here. “You’re so fucking nosy!” he says, smiling. After I shoot him a look, he
shakes his head and reaches for my hand, pulling me out the front door.

Parked
in my driveway is a brand new, sparkling red Lexus IS convertible. “How did
you…? When did you…?” I can’t take my eyes off of it. One step at a time, I
walk toward it. Evan runs ahead and around the car to open the driver’s side
door. When I get there, he’s holding out the key. Before taking it from him, I
stretch up on the tips of my toes to kiss him. I couldn’t care less that
there’s some stranger standing by the steps. “I seriously love the shit out of
you, Evan Pierce.”

“Damn
right you do,” he gloats proudly. “Will you be okay while I sign the rest of
the paperwork?”

“Shouldn’t
I sign it?”

“We
aren’t having this discussion right now, Kacie. Enjoy your car. I’ll be back in
a few minutes.” He kisses me one more time before taking the guy into the
house.

Sliding
in behind the steering wheel is both terrifying and liberating at the same
time. It’s a reminder of the last time I sat in a leather seat exactly like
this one. The feel is the same. The smell is the same. I’m sure it will be a
while before being able to forget the sensation of losing control and ending up
under the flatbed of a truck, but having the car in front of my house gives me
back my freedom. That’s what’s most important.

I push
the button to bring her to life and relax, listening. The next thing I do is
put the top down. Having the sun shine on my face always makes me feel better.
Only because I haven’t been given clearance to actually drive yet, I program my
favorite radio stations instead of taking her for a spin around the block. Evan
would rat me out, and I can’t do that to my brother. Well, not yet. The last
thing I need to do is link my phone to it, but it’s inside and I don’t want to
get out.

“Where
did this come from?” Jade asks over the music.

I jump
because I didn’t hear her walking up. “Shit, Jade,” I reply, putting a hand
over my heart. “Evan.”

She
smiles. “Of course. I should’ve known.” She opens the door and parks her ass
next to me. “That man is a fucking god.”

“And
you haven’t even slept with him.”

“You’re
making me wish I had.”

The
man from the Lexus dealer is coming out of the house and proceeds straight for
the truck he used to deliver my car. Normally, I’d be flipping out at how much
money it probably cost, but not today. Only this once, I’m going to simply
enjoy being spoiled. The moment is ruined as Evan comes running out of the
house.

“What’s
wrong with you?” Jade questions as I turn down the music.

“Absolutely
nothing. Mary called. It’s time to roll.” Jade and I both get out of the car.
She climbs into the back of the convertible as Evan waits for me to get to the
passenger side. He senses the panic setting in. “No worries, beautiful.
Everything will be fine.”

“But
what if he doesn’t sign it?”