Les Tales (26 page)

What am I doing here?

She didn't know what else to do. She hadn't thought beyond telling Kai her feelings. She hadn't known how the other woman would react, but she had hoped for something more than this. More than her anger and the pain in those beloved eyes. Her stomach cramped, and a sob hiccuped from her lips.

Kai.

Chloe felt like she'd just killed something beautiful and precious. Nothing would ever be the same now. Kai hated her. Her mother would blame her, and rightly so, for trying to seduce her best friend, who hadn't been with anyone in damn near two years. She cursed again. Then fumbled in her pocket for her cell phone.

Zahra picked up on the first ring. “How'd it go?”

“She hates me.” Then the tears came.

They flooded down her face as she told her friend everything that had happened. The devastated look on Kai's face. Her anger. The way she hadn't even wanted Chloe to come close to her.

“She thinks that I'm some sort of conscienceless nympho who doesn't give a shit about family!” she cried. “I can't believe I kissed her.”

It had been better when she had Kai's unconditional love, when Kai saw her as just a little girl to spoil and indulge. Now she had nothing except the older woman's contempt.

“Slow your roll, honey. You don't know any of that.” Zahra made soothing noises through the phone. “Stop over-thinking these things. Maybe she just went out to get some cigarettes. You probably got her real hot and bothered when you laid that kiss on her.”

But Chloe wasn't in the mood to laugh. She wanted to just cut her losses and leave the apartment. Pretend that she hadn't said any of those things to Kai. Allow the other woman to get back to how her life was before Chloe confessed her dirty secret and tried to tongue her down in her own bed.

“I'm just going to leave,” she said finally.

“No, girl. What if she left without her key? Are you just going to leave her stranded outside her own place? That's not cool.”

“Then what am I going to do?” She felt like an uncertain teenager again.

“Face things like a woman. If she doesn't feel the same way, then clit up. Face the facts and move on. You're not going to be in Atlanta for very much longer, anyway.” The sound of traffic came through the phone, like Zahra had stepped out onto the balcony of her office to talk. “You did a bold thing. It's cool if it didn't work out. A lot of us don't bother to take those kinds of chances with our lives.”

“But I didn't want it to turn out this way!” She went to the window where Kai had stood, and looked down onto the sunlit day. The brightness and the falling leaves mocked the way she felt, the agony and fear tearing her stomach to pieces.

“We don't choose the way other people feel, girl. We can only take risks and hope they pay off.” Zahra sighed. “It'll be okay. Just come home as soon as you can. I'll make you a Hennessy and Coke, and you can cry all over my new Gucci suit.” She made another soothing sound. “It'll be okay. It's not the end of the world.”

Chloe sniffled and wiped the tears away with her fingers. “Okay.”

“Now, go wash your face and change into something more comfortable. I'm sure those fuck-me heels and that tight-ass outfit you have on aren't the best to sleep in.”

Chloe looked down at her dress, which pushed her cleavage up to her neck, and the high-heeled boots, which seemed more suited for a horizontal position. “You're probably right about that.”

“Have some ice cream, or whatever it is you need to feel better. Then just apologize to her when she gets home. Tell her you made a mistake and ask her to forget about everything you said. Okay?”

Chloe winced at the thought of talking with Kai about the things she'd confessed. She dreaded facing her but knew she had to. Her mother didn't raise a coward.

“Okay.” She pressed a palm to her hot cheek. “Thanks, Z.”

“Of course, girl. I got you. Don't ever forget that.” The sound of a sliding-glass door opening or closing came through the phone. “And when you get back, I'll hook you up with a fine-ass stud to fuck the shit out of you. After more nuts than you can count, you'll be saying, ‘Kai who?'”

Chloe did laugh at that, a weak sound. “Thanks again for talking me down from the ledge.”

“Anytime.”

Chloe hung up the phone. Then she did what her friend had suggested, taking a shower and changing into her flannel pajamas. When she came out of the room and saw that Kai still hadn't come back, she didn't feel like eating anything, not even the Ben & Jerry's ice cream in the freezer. Instead, she climbed into Kai's bed and, exhausted by the weight of her own emotions, quickly fell asleep.

Chloe woke up to the sound of quiet footsteps in the dark. Under the covers, she turned her head toward the doorway of the bedroom to see a tall feminine silhouette. She didn't move. Only watched Kai come farther into the bedroom and sit on the bed, sinking into the mattress with her scented weight. She felt the torment in the other woman, her unease. Chloe turned to her.

“Kai—”

The other woman's mouth quieted the rest of what she had to say. Chloe gasped at the feel of those warm lips and Kai's cool cheeks, which had been exposed to the brisk fall wind outside. She tasted like alcohol, like something hot and potent. Whiskey.

One night years ago, her roommate had brought some absinthe from Amsterdam for Chloe to try. The drink had been potent and hot, a surprisingly bitter burn, and Stacia had insisted that Chloe have it with a honey chaser. The drink had slid hotly into her belly, settling in it like sparks that caused a thousand forest fires. Kai was like that now. She tasted of both the bitter and the sweet. The honey and the absinthe sliding together down Chloe's throat, a heady concoction that made her open her mouth for more. More. More.

She trembled as Kai lightly brushed her lips across hers, a gentle tease, before pressing more firmly, delicate and determined. Kai licked her mouth, tasted its corners, her hands settling on Chloe's shoulders. Those hands were cool but quickly warmed as they moved gently over the flannel covering Chloe's skin.

Chloe parted her lips for Kai's tongue, and the other woman groaned, a tortured sound.

“Fuck . . .” She tugged the covers down to get more of Chloe. “I'm going to hell for this. I'm going to hell,” she moaned against Chloe's mouth. “But, God help me, I want you.”

Chloe made a glad noise, pressing herself even more into the kiss, into Kai's firm upper body, which was covered by a thick cashmere sweater. Kai pushed the sheet away completely, then unbuttoned the flannel pajamas as her kiss sweetly seduced Chloe, her tongue firm and hot, her skin soft and perfect. Chloe trembled, unable to believe that at last, she was getting to kiss the older woman the way she'd always wanted, that Kai was touching her with desire.

She gasped when Kai touched her breasts, her thumbs brushing nipples that were already painfully hard. Between her legs was a river, flooding with want and anticipation.

She whimpered as her body surged with sensation, her senses nearly on overload at the improbable that was actually happening: the dreamed-for moment of Kai making love with her.

“Oh, God . . .” She clawed at Kai's shoulders.

“Sh . . .” her lover murmured as she kissed Chloe way down her throat, her lips moving in a tingling path down to where her hands already tugged and pinched at Chloe's sensitive flesh, inciting her even more. “I'm going to make it so good for you.” Kai bit her throat. “So good.” She soothed the bite with her tongue; then her head dipped down.

Chloe cried out as Kai's mouth covered her nipple. Her tongue swept over the sensitive tip again and again while she squeezed and tugged at the other nipple. Chloe's sex felt too swollen to be contained. She shifted her thighs under the sheet, trapped in the flannel pajamas.

“Kai . . .” It was so natural to call out her lover's name after so many years of fantasizing about touching her, about feeling her mouth, her hands. Chloe threw her head back, gripping Kai's thick locks as Kai pleasured her with her mouth, teased her breasts and the sensitive nipples. Chloe quaked in the sheets, overcome by the sensations.

This
was what it meant to not have an imitation of what she craved. Ecstasy rolled through her, and she shuddered, her body reaching its completion without Kai ever touching her pussy.

Chloe panted and sagged in the bed. But Kai didn't stop. She tugged down the pajama bottoms and slid her fingers into the dampness between Chloe's thighs.

Kai groaned with pleasure as she effortlessly found the swollen clit and stroked it. Chloe's desire swiftly rose again. She groaned and arched her back, her breasts lifting into Kai's mouth, her hips circling in the bed as Kai pressed and circled her clit. First a slow and languorous dance of fingers and sensitive flesh. Then a firmer caress, a finger under Chloe's hood. Harder, then faster, until a flush rose up Chloe's chest, a prickling heat, and she cried out again, shudders of orgasm shaking the bed.

“Can I get inside you?” Kai gasped the question against Chloe's throat.

“Yes!” Chloe widened her legs, and Kai slid her fingers deep inside. They both trembled.

“You're fucking amazing,” Kai groaned. “Amazing . . .”

She settled her body over Chloe's, one hand sinking in her hair, gripping it tight, the other between her legs, sweetly fucking another orgasm into her, then another and another, building the sensation higher and higher, until she gushed her peak over Kai's hand and into the sheets. She screamed from the pleasure, her body a tight bow, all her muscles tensed and aching. Kai still fucked her, her fingers pressing, making a firm and beguiling motion against her G-spot, which stirred her hips again.

It was like Kai was making love to her for the first and last time. Giving Chloe everything at once.

Chloe panted as the sensations tripped through her.

“Wait . . .” She pressed her hands against Kai's chest. “I want to touch you,” Chloe gasped. “Let me touch you!”

“You're so beautiful. . . .” Kai buried her nose in Chloe's throat, nibbling the side of her neck, her fingers making lazy strokes between her thighs, stirring through the thick moisture, then wandering back until they slid hotly against her rear passage.

“Oh!”

Chloe's fingers clenched Kai's sweater as the other woman explored her tender orifice, sliding in a gentle finger. Another finger caressed her clitoris, circling the sensitive bud.

“Kai!”

The finger at her rear moved deeper, moving subtly to the rhythm of the first, while Chloe's breathing changed again, the pleasure building with each movement of Kai's fingers on her, inside her. She had never felt anything like it before, her bottom stretched and opening hungrily to swallow the long finger, the knowing press and caress of her clit, a quivering pleasure.

Her breath quickened. Her nails sank into Kai's sweater while her lover's hands worked magic between her thighs until she was coming apart. Coming apart and screaming.

“Stop!” Chloe gasped. “Stop, please.”

She pulled away from Kai, acutely feeling her nudity while her lover was still fully dressed. “I want to touch you. I want to make love with you.”

Kai shook her head and pulled back even more, pressing kisses to Chloe's hands. She was breathing heavily. With the orgasmic tremors falling away from her, Chloe could smell the alcohol even more on Kai's breath. The other woman drew back even farther.

“It's just this time,” Kai said. “Just this once.” Her hungry gaze swept down Chloe's body. “Ever since the night of the fair I've been thinking about you, thinking about touching you. It felt so wrong.” She groaned. “But damn, you feel so good.”

Chloe grabbed Kai's sweater in her fists. “Don't say that. Stay with me. Let me show you how much I love you.”

But Kai took her hands and pressed them together. “You don't want me, baby. Not really.”

Chloe stiffened. “Does that mean you don't really want me, either?”

“Fuck, I still want you. I want to taste and touch every part of you. I want . . .” She made a noise of frustration and need. “But this has to be it. There can't be any more.” Kai stumbled to her feet and backed away from the bed. “Go back to sleep.” Chloe could make out only the barest gleam of Kai's bright eyes in the darkness. “I'll see you in the morning.”

She stared in disbelief as Kai left the room and closed the door behind her. Her body was satisfied. Thoroughly ravaged and drenched in the aftermath. But she'd wanted an exchange of equals. Not some bullshit encounter that Kai could write off, as if it had never happened. The more she thought about it, the angrier she got. She jumped up from the bed and stumbled as her weak knees nearly buckled under her. She clung to the side of the bed for a moment, then left the bedroom, still naked, to find Kai.

She didn't have to go far. As soon as she padded into the hallway, she heard the sounds of light snoring. She followed the noises and found Kai sprawled on her back on the couch, still fully dressed, one leg dangling on the floor. She looked . . . vulnerable. Unlike herself.

Chloe felt that ache inside her again. The feeling that she had done something to Kai, something that was wicked, something that the older woman did not deserve. Chloe remembered the words Kai had moaned against her mouth as she made love to her, the agony behind them.

I'm going to hell for this,
she had moaned.
I'm going to hell.

She didn't want Kai like that. Not so torn and obviously tortured about what they had done and about what she was feeling for Chloe. Sighing, Chloe took off Kai's shoes, put her dangling leg on the couch, and draped a blanket over her sleeping body. She loved Kai, but the last thing she wanted to do was hurt her like this.