Let Me Go (30 page)

Dear Sister,

Sorry, it seemed kind of weird saying “Dear
Kat,” seeing as that’s my name and all too. Writing a letter to
yourself was just too damn odd.

If you are reading this, then you know I’m
dead. That sounds so cliché, but what else can I really say, huh?
It also means Eddie got this to you. He’s a good kid. He’s had a
life similar to the one I had, but he never went the drug route.
Sometimes, I wish I had the strength to stay away like he has. But
what’s done is done.

You are probably wondering why I wrote this
letter. I guess you can call this one of my “clear moments.” I
didn’t have a great life, but it seems you didn’t either. I started
taking drugs when our mom forced me to, but it quickly became
something I wanted to do. They gave me a reprieve from my life.
Slowly, it became something I needed. I met Samantha, Eddie’s mom,
when I was younger and we bonded over our love of drugs and
partying, but she had Eddie and he was so innocent. He reminded me
of myself, of who I wished I was, at least. You’ll be surprised to
know that because of him, I actually tried to get clean and sober a
few times, but when the drugs take a hold of you, you’re in for
life, at least I was.

One of the low points in my life was around
the time I accused Mason of rape. I relied on drugs so heavily then
that I couldn’t see reason. I needed them. And he had denied me
access, so I sought revenge. Looking back, I honestly don’t know
how he was even convicted. Hell, I guess I’m a great actress.
Doesn’t hurt that I made it look like I was raped and I managed to
snag a loose hair of his from his jacket when I was in his office.
Yeah, even doped up, I was pretty smart.

I’d like to say I’m a nice person deep down
and I felt bad about him later on in life, but honestly, I forgot
about that time when I cleaned up a bit. I never really thought
about my actions, at least how they affected other people, until
you came barging into my room.

Yeah, I was shocked to see you, but I was
also jealous. I’ve been jealous of you my whole life. I imagined
you living the good life, adopted by a loving family, while our mom
hated me and used me for her own benefit. The sad part of it all
was that all I really wanted from her was love, or affection, or
something else just as corny and cliché. All I ever got from her
was indifference. So yeah, I hated you because I was sure you had
lived a charmed life and had someone that loved you.

When you said you hadn’t, I didn’t believe
you. And even so, as shitty as your life was, mine was worse. So I
went to Mason. I’m sure you already know this. How did I find him?
Easy. He’s fucking listed! Moron. Oh, and how did I find you? How
did I know where to send Eddie? I followed you. That’s also how I
figured out how to act and dress like you, and that’s how I knew
Mason was alone. I wanted money so I could get out of this shitty
place, so I could help myself, Samantha, and Eddie. I also needed
it so I could get high as shit and forget this entire mess you made
me remember. And I wanted to hurt you because it seemed like you
really did find love when I never had it.

It’s thanks to Mason that you are getting
this letter. Even being high when I saw him and trying to pump him
for cash, he loved you. He fucking loved you. He loved you so much
that he refused to see me for who I was because he only wanted to
see you. And then I broke his heart. It didn’t really hit me at the
time, but when I came home, Eddie asked me what was wrong. And
there it was, someone that actually cared for me, and I was too
high all my life to even realize it. I was fucking pissing my life
away, thinking I was alone in this world and this sweet kid
actually cared if I was all right.

That got me thinking about how not only was
I ruining my life, but I was ruining his because he had to take
care of me when I was too far gone. And then when I thought back to
how sad Mason had looked, I realized I had ruined his life, not
once, but now twice. Finally, I thought about you and how I had
been jealous all my life because I thought you had it all, but I
was wrong. And when you finally did, I was taking it all away from
you too. Call me sentimental or some shit, but you are my family
after all. And what I saw in Mason’s eyes was pure love and pure
despair, all for you.

I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to kill
myself or if I wanted one last hoorah before I decided to do
something good for a change, but let’s just say I knew what I was
doing. And clearly, if I survived, you wouldn’t be reading this,
and let’s just hope I hadn’t reconsidered and was strong enough to
right some wrongs for once. I’d like to think I was better than mom
and would have done that, but I guess we’ll never know.

Anyway, I told Eddie everything. I told him
what I did to Mason and told him I needed to help you guys somehow.
The kid’s real smart. He told me I needed to confess and get it
notarized. So, you’ll find my confession that I lied and falsely
accused Mason Tredwell of rape all notarized and shit in here too.
And since Eddie knows it all, I guess he can be a witness. I hope
you can use this to clear your man and live happily ever after.

Before you think I’m some saint in hiding or
something, I have to say that even though Mason’s love for you got
me thinking about this, I really did it for selfish reasons. And my
selfish reason is Eddie. I don’t want this life for him. I don’t
want him to wake up one day and turn to drugs because he thinks he
can’t handle it anymore like I did. And I’m betting that you and
Mason are good enough people to take care of him. I need you to
watch over him, make sure he stays out of trouble, gets good
grades, goes to a good college and makes something of himself. And
in case you haven’t read between the lines, that involves money,
and that’s something neither I nor Samantha have. Obviously, I’m
not asking you to take him away from his mom, but maybe you can
help her a little too, but really, I only care about Eddie, and if
Samantha is taken care of, then Eddie is free to take care of
himself. He’s a good kid, a great kid, and he deserves a better
life.

So use this information to clear Mason and
live your life happily. Think of me often, and watch Eddie
grow.

I’ll end this saying the one thing I wished
someone would tell me.

I love you.

Hope I earned a little love back too,

Katherine

Kat had been holding back tears while
reading the letter, but when she looked at the attached confession,
detailing everything Katherine had done and lied about, she knew it
was real. And then she sobbed. She clutched the letter to her chest
and cried. After a few moments, she felt a hand on her shoulder and
looked at Eddie sitting beside her. There were tears in his eyes
and when she looked at him, he nodded, as if he knew what she was
asking.
Was this real?

This moment was bittersweet for Kat. She got what she
wanted, but at the cost of the sister whom she finally realized
could have been saved. Katherine had earned a little love back; in
fact, she earned a lot of love back. Thanks to one letter, Kat
understood her better than she thought and loved her more than she
could have imagined. And as she pulled Eddie into a hug, she kept
whispering over and over, “Thank you Katherine, I do love you.”

Chapter 44

Kat wasn’t sure
how long it would take to get Mason cleared once she filed the
appropriate paperwork and went through the right channels. Trent
helped her the entire time, and she was forever grateful to him.
Until everything was in writing and Mason’s name was officially
cleared, she still didn’t want to see him or even speak to him. It
was too painful for her because even though she was sure he would
be cleared now, she still looked like the woman that had taken his
life from him. Even though Katherine had redeemed herself and then
some, it still didn’t change the past. It still didn’t change what
Mason had to go through; the pain, violation, and humiliation he
suffered. She knew she’d have to get over that because deep down
she knew Mason did truly love her, but until she could clear him,
she felt like she had nothing to offer.

So when he tried to reach out to her, she
pushed him away. He called and stopped by and wrote her emails and
texts, but she couldn’t even tell him to give her time because she
didn’t want to give either of them false hope. She had learned her
lesson. The last time she asked him to wait, something bad
happened.

She told Mason she needed to get herself in
order and that she was working on something, but that was as much
as she would tell him. She always kept her voice flat and her
emotions in check even though she was dying inside every time she
heard his voice.

Kat kept telling herself that it would just
be a little bit more and she could finally have her happily ever
after.

*****

The month after Katherine’s funeral was hell
for Mason. He tried to stay away from Kat for the first few days,
tried to give her some space and time, but then he couldn’t take it
anymore. He became somewhat of a stalker. He called her, went over
to her apartment, contacted her, tried everything he could to get
her to at least speak to him, but it was like she was made of
stone. Every time he spoke to her, she sounded distant, but he
could hear the underlying hurt and it killed him to know it was all
because of him. If he hadn’t mistaken her for her sister, she
wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place. And as much as he
loved her and wanted to be with her and was secretly grateful for
his own stupid mistaken identity error, he wanted her to be happy
above all. And she sounded anything but happy. But he couldn’t give
up. He didn’t want to.

He lifted his phone to dial her number to
try to talk some sense into her yet again when it lit up. It was
his lawyer. Mason only spoke to his lawyer when they had business
to settle, like when he needed to set up an account for Kat to
access. So when his lawyer called him, he was tempted to ignore it
and get back to him later so he could call Kat. But then he was
afraid it might have something to do with Kat, so he picked up, and
his life changed.

He was cleared; his name was cleared. He got
a formal apology and a huge settlement. But as much as he had
wanted to celebrate that moment, he couldn’t because all he could
think of was Kat. He wanted to hug her and kiss her and tell her he
was a free man. But she wasn’t there. It didn’t stop him from
wanting the details so he could go find her and share.

“Who? What? Where? How? I don’t understand.”
The standard questions were out of his mouth in an instant.

“Apparently, the accuser confessed her
crimes in a letter to her sister. There was even a witness. The
name on the account I set up before sounded awfully familiar. And a
match for the sister’s name. I have a feeling this will be a good
story. You’ll have to share with me one day. But for now, I’ll let
you go celebrate this wonderful news.”

They discussed the fact that he would have
to sign a bunch of paperwork and meet with some officials, but he
was basically free.

He thanked him profusely and hung up. He
knew exactly where he was headed.

*****

Kat could breathe. Finally, after months, it
felt like she could finally breathe. Trent had just informed her
that Mason was a free man. She fell into her chair, relieved and
scared and nervous, but mostly, she was happy. She wasn’t even
happy for herself, she was happy for Mason. He deserved this. He
deserved to be cleared, to be able to choose his life without a
stain on his record or reputation. He deserved to be happy, and she
hoped he was.

It felt like only minutes when someone
knocked, no, pounded on her door. She jumped, startled, and then
went to open it and there he was. He was beaming, but he didn’t
move. He just stared at her, a smile on his lips, but caution in
his eyes.

Finally, the corners of her mouth lifted in
a smile of their own and he pounced. He lifted her in his arms and
spun her around. Then he put her back down. “Thank you,” he said
softly, but seriously.

“I take it you’re cleared?”

“I am!” he shouted, throwing his head back
and laughing. “And it’s all thanks to you.”

“Actually, it was thanks to Katherine.”

“I heard, but it was also because of you.
You didn’t give up and you pushed, and then God knows what you went
through this past month to get this all to add up. That’s why you
pushed me away, wasn’t it? So you could do this for me?”

She nodded slowly.

“Oh God, Kat. I love you so much. I am the
luckiest man alive to have someone like you looking out for me.”
And then he kissed her and she felt every one of his words come to
life in that kiss. He kissed her like he was dying and only her
lips could save him. She didn’t want the kiss to end. They pulled
apart after minutes, panting.

“So now what?”

“Well, first we are going to celebrate. Then
I’m going to show you just how grateful I am to have you in my life
and how much I love you and worship you.”

She giggled and slapped his arm playfully,
but then changed her tone and spoke seriously. “As awesome as that
sounds, you know what I mean. You can do anything now. You don’t
have to work handyman jobs anymore. You don’t have to hide out from
the world and feel like an imposter. You can go back to being a
doctor, going to charity events, everything you used to do.”

He appeared to be in thought for a moment,
“Honestly, I don’t know. I didn’t think that far ahead. I just
heard and came here as soon as I found out. But maybe I’ll try to
refresh my medical knowledge and get back to doing what I love. Who
knows? Right now, all I care about is you and how much I missed
you. God, these past few months have been torture.” He leaned down
to kiss her again, but she couldn’t. She pushed him away lightly
and he looked confused.