Letting Go (14 page)

“What do you mean as far as you know?”

“He hasn’t said anything about it. I don’t want to pressure him either way.”

“Quinn,” Carly gently began as she kept her voice low, “has it ever occurred to you that maybe Luke wouldn’t perceive that as pressure? Maybe he’d take it as encouragement. And honestly, we both know he has some insecurities when it comes to you. Some encouragement might be nice. I know I don’t know him as well as you do, but still, I’ve known him for a long time. I think maybe he’d like it if you told him that you are all for the idea.”

Quinn tilted her head to the side, quizzically eyeing up her sister. “Maybe you’re right.”

“Does it feel too fast to you?”

Quinn shook her head. “No, but if it were anyone else—”

Carly cut her off. “But it’s not. It’s not someone else. It’s Luke. When you were kids you used to sit in his tree house late at night trying to find shooting stars. He’s the one that pulled you aside at recess and taught you how to tie your shoes when your gym teacher wouldn’t stop giving you a hard time about tripping over your laces. You taught him how to make grilled peanut butter and banana sandwiches. You have a history, Quinn. And most of it? It isn’t bad. So if anyone begrudges you a future with Luke? They’ll have to answer to me. I will personally kick their ass,” Carly said, flashing Quinn a sweet smile.

Quinn couldn’t help but smile back. “Thanks.”

“Speaking of not moving too fast,” Carly said as her smile slipped into a
n irritating smirk, “It’s been
months.
I can’t believe you and Luke still haven’t—”

“Well, we haven’t,” Quinn retorted. “Not everyone jumps into bed on the first date.” She cringed, realizing how bitchy she sounded
.

“No,” Carly said, her voice harsher than Quinn had heard it in a long time, “they don’t.”
She sat back in the booth, glaring at Quinn.

“Carly, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything by
that. I wasn’t implying anything. But still, I shouldn’t have said it.” Their conversation had just taken a sharp downward spiral and Quinn knew she was entirely responsible. Her comment wasn’t meant to sound so snippy. It was just that she was feeling frustrated after last weekend. She hadn’t meant to insult her sister, which she apparently had.

Last weekend was really the first opportunity she and Luke had ha
d to be together...
like that
. She was irritated with herself for not making sure she was prepared, and not just assuming he would be. She was also disappointed that last night, they could’ve had the opportunity again. But again, he’d opted to head home. She was taking out her frustration on Carly, who definitely did not deserve it.

“You’re right,”
Carly replied. “I think you might be surprised that—” She cut herself off.

“What?” Quinn asked.

“I am so sorry I’m running late,” Jemma said as she dropped herself into the booth next to Carly.

“It’s not a problem,” Carly said as she turned away from her sister.

“Well, look at you!” Jemma said with a grin as she turned to Quinn. “What’s this all about?”

Quinn felt herself blushing. She had no doubt Jemma was asking about her new look.

“A new you, for dating Luke?” Jemma asked. She took in Quinn’s smooth hair, her plucked eyebrows, her polished nails.

“What?” she asked with a self-conscious laugh. “Did I really let myself go so badly before?”

“No!” Jemma was quick to assure her. “It’s just that it’s been awhile since I’ve seen you with your hair straight like that.”

“I think she looks good,” Carly said, her anger already fading away.

“Thanks,” Quinn said as she darted a glance in Carly’s direction. She wanted to apologize properly, explain herself, really. But she didn’t want to do that with Jemma there. Instead she said, “I just felt like trying something different.” She smoothed down her already smooth hair.

“Does Luke like it?” Jemma asked.

Quinn frowned, surprised by the question. “I think so. Why?”

Jemma shrugged. “Don’t get me wrong, I do like it. It’s just that you look different. You don’t look like
you
. And we all know how Luke likes
you
,” she finished with a grin.

“Are you ready to order yet?” Their waitress appeared at t
he side of their table, taking them all by surprise.

Quinn and Carly looked to Jemma. She shrugged, having eaten here enough times she knew what she liked. “I’ll have the Caesar salad.”

“I’ll have the same,” Carly said.

Quinn sighed, giving up thoughts of a cheeseburger and onion rings because it just didn’t seem right. “Me, too.”

They completed the order by adding on drinks and their waitress disappeared.

“So,” Jemma said as she made a sour face, “guess who I had the displeasure of speaking with the other day.” Her gaze swung between the sisters as she waited for one of them to respond.

Quinn shrugged and Carly said, “I have no idea.”

“Tabby,” Jemma said with a frown.

“Where did you see her at?” Quinn asked. She knew Luke’s old girlfriend had moved back to town quite awhile ago. She felt fortunate that she hadn’t had a run in with her because the last time they’d spoken, the conversation had not gone well.

“She came in for an appointment,” Jemma said. She was a dental hygienist in town. “You would think that with all of the work I had to do in her mouth, it would’ve kept her from talking. But no, the woman would not shut up. I actually ran over
on time and was late for my next appointment.”

Quinn shifted uncomfortably. She was pretty sure that she didn’t want to know what Tabby had to say. She was just as sure that Jemma would tell her anyway.

Jemma tossed her ebony hair over her shoulder. She narrowed her dark brown eyes and shook her head. “What did Luke ever see in her? That girl is whiny and vindictive. The way she went off—”

Jemma’s eyes widened as she jumped in her seat. Quinn had the distinct impression that Carly had kicked her.

“We should all go out tonight!” Carly suggested brightly, talking over whatever else Jemma was about to say. “Maybe Lily would even drive over.”

Jemma turned to her, a stunned and annoyed look on her face.

Carly shot her a look that Quinn couldn’t miss. Quinn fought the urge to roll her eyes. It was obvious Carly was trying to save her from a conversation she probably didn’t want to have. Though, she was curious, to some extent. Not curious enough to ask because she knew that the conversation would bring about nothing good.

“Tonight?” Jemma asked. Her expression softened when she saw the look Carly gave her. Quinn could almost see the understanding wash through her. Carly did not want Jemma to discuss Tab
by. Jemma, who usually didn’t worry too much about what other people wanted, visibly relented.

“We can’t
go out tonight. Mom’s having a family dinner,” Quinn reminded Carly, pulling the attention away from the silent conversation that was going on.

“After Mom’s dinner,” Carly persisted. Quinn realized that the subject change hadn’t entirely been a ruse. Carly did want to go out.
“How do you still not know that no one goes out until much later in the evening?” Carly wondered.

Quinn shrugged
.

“I can’t go, anyway,” Jemma said. “I have plans with Bart.”

“Oh, do you?” Carly teased. “Is this the same Bart you were dating last fall?”

“It is,” Jemma confirmed with a defiantly teasing smile.

“So, invite him along,” Carly suggested.

“I would but we’re actually going to a dinner party at his co-worker’s tonight. But maybe next time?”

Carly nodded.

“Would you look at that,” Quinn said with a tiny smirk. “I never thought I’d see the day when both of you would settle down.”

Jemma turned to Lily. “Does that mean you’re still with Nolan?”

Carly nodded and smiled.
Something about her smile left Quinn feeling unconvinced of her happiness even though she said, “I am.”

“Well, when are we going to meet this man?” Jemma demanded.

“That’s what I’d like to know,” Quinn added on.

Carly’s smile faded a bit. “I’ve invited him a few time
s but,” she gave them a small shrug, “the timing just doesn’t seem to work out. I hadn’t planned on coming home this weekend but my Friday afternoon class got canceled. He’d already made his own plans by the time I decided to come back to Lanford.”

“Well, soon,” Jemma decisively told her. “Try to pick a weekend. We can all get together.”

“That’s a good idea,” Quinn pressed.

Carly was saved from having to answer because the waitress arrived with their salads.

They chatted through the rest of lunch, catching up on each other’s lives. Carly was excited that the end of the school year was edging ever closer. After that, she only had one year left. She was more than ready to be done.

Jemma hinted that things were progressively getting more serious with Bart. Though at one time she proclaimed she’d happily be single forever that no longer seemed the case. She seemed completely happy with him.

Quinn told them both that she’d begun the tedious task of job-searching. She also admitted to Jemma, though she asked her to keep the news to herself, that she and Luke had looked at a house. Jemma didn’t seem the least bit surprised. If anything, Quinn was relieved to realize, she seemed to have the same attitude as Carly.

“You and Luke?” Jemma said. “Your happiness is long overdue.”

Carly nodded her agreement.

After the bill was paid and plans were tentatively made for getting together again soon, Carly and Quinn headed back to their parents’ house.

“Carly,” Quinn began, “I am so sorry for what I said back there. It was completely uncalled for.” She glanced over at Carly who was staring out the passenger window as they rolled to a stop at the stop sign.

“Oh, what?” Carly asked as she swung her gaze back around. Her voice was a bit too high-pitched. A bit too innocent. “You mean the comment that basically implied I
sleep around?”

Quinn sighed. “I actually wasn’t implying you, believe it or not,” Quinn honestly told her. “I could tell by the look on your face, you thought I was. But I wasn’t. I just meant in general. So many people just hop into bed together. And then when you questioned me on it, I kind of snapped. Because to be honest, while I’m not the kind of girl
who’s ever done the first date thing...Maybe I’m…” She hesitated, wondering how to continue. She wasn’t good at talking about this kind of thing.

“
You’re…
?” Carly prompted.

“Maybe I’m wishing I was just a little bit like that kind of girl,” Quinn finally blurted out as the car got moving again.

Carly squirmed in her seat. “Are you saying you want to and Luke doesn’t?”

Quinn made a face. “Not exactly. I’m saying we both want to, and I’m not sure why we haven’t.”

“Oh,” Carly said, her tone had instantly brightened. “I get it now. You’re snippy because you’re feeling sexually frustrated.”

“What?!” Quinn cried. “No!”

Carly only laughed. “It’s okay, Quinn. It’s me. You can tell me anything. I don’t judge, remember?”

“Alright,” Quinn said with a laugh
of her own. “Yeah, maybe that’s part of it.”

“
Do you think that Betsy will move in? With Jesse, I mean, when Luke moves out?” Carly wondered.

Quinn hadn’t told Carly about the conversation they’d had the night they’d all gone out. In fact, Quinn went out of her way to avoid bringing up Betsy at all. She shrugged. “I really don’t know.”
She cast a wary glance at her sister and decided to go for full honesty because that’s what she would want, if she’d been asking the question. “But if I had to guess, I’d say that yes, she would. At least if she has her way.”

Carly silently nodded.

“Why are you asking? Quinn wondered.

“No reason.
”

“Are you sure?” Quinn pushed ahead. “Do you still have feelings for him?”

Carly turned to look at her. She forced a smile onto her face. “I’m with Nolan. Jesse’s with Betsy. I haven’t even talked to him since…” She faded off.

“Jake’s funeral?” Quinn guessed.

“Yes,” Carly said. “I  mean, I saw him a few times last summer, when I was home. But he was always with Betsy so we never actually talked.”

Quinn thought that over for a few minutes
as she drove through the slush covered streets. Carly and Jesse had had a notorious on-again, off-again relationship spanning nearly a decade. Though apparently, this past year it had been entirely off. Quinn had always thought that would be for the best. Carly never seemed entirely happy when she was with Jesse. Now, even though she was supposedly happy with Nolan, Quinn couldn’t miss the note of sadness in her sister’s voice when she spoke about Jesse.

“Carly,” Quinn said as she pulled up to their parents’ house, “you never answered my question. Do you still have feelings for him?”