Listen for the Lie (22 page)

“Calm down, I just want to talk.”

Keaton says the words to me before I've had a chance to react to his strolling up to me and Emmett. I bite back the urge to point out that I'm totally calm. I'd rather not get murdered by Savvy's brother today.

Keaton pulls up a chair and plunks his beer down, sloshing some on the table.

He looks like Savvy. He always has, but it takes my breath away for a moment when he lifts his head to meet my gaze. Same blue eyes, same nose, same way of twisting their lips when they're nervous.

His eyes are clear, steady on mine. He's obviously tipsy, but not totally wasted. He takes a gulp of his beer like he's trying to rectify this.

“Why don't you finish that and I'll drive you home?” Emmett offers.

“I'm fine.” He jerks his head in the general direction of the bar. “I have a ride.”

He goes silent then, and Emmett and I exchange a glance.

“So, how have you been?” I finally ask. Maybe the suspected murderer is supposed to start the conversation in this situation.

He shrugs. “Fine. Got married. Had a kid.”

He looks fairly miserable about both these choices, so I'm not sure how to respond.

“I want to talk to you about Savvy.” He drains his beer, wipes the dribble from his beard, and signals the bartender for another.

“I sort of guessed.”

“You and that podcaster are chummy now, right?”

A scene from last night, Ben's head between my thighs, flashes through my mind. “I don't think that
chummy
is the word.”

“He's on your side,” Keaton says.

“Ben is always only on Ben's side.”

“When I talked to him, he seemed to be real sympathetic to you.”

I shrug. The waitress sets a new beer down in front of him.

“Does he think you did it?” he asks.

“I don't know, why don't you ask him?”

He slumps back in his chair with a long sigh. “You are still a giant pain in the ass, you know that?”

“Hey—” Emmett starts.

“Yes,” I say. “I am.”

“But in a fun way,” Emmett says helpfully. I laugh.

Keaton rolls his eyes. “Listen. I've been thinking.”

“A dangerous pastime,” I say.

“Yeah— Wait, what?” He waves his hand like he's annoyed with me. No one can blame him, considering I'm making
Beauty and the Beast
jokes while we're talking about his sister's murder. “I didn't know. About Matt.”

“About Matt and Julia?” I ask, playing dumb. “No one did, from the sound of it.”

Keaton pauses. Emmett takes a sip of his beer and grimaces.

“I didn't know he was a jerk.”

Emmett snorts.

“What's that supposed to mean?” Keaton asks.

“Nothing.” Emmett drinks and grimaces.

Keaton gives him a weird look. “Anyway. I didn't know he was … you know. Violent.”

“Yes, a
real
shocker,” I say earnestly. Both Emmett and Keaton freeze, and then exchange a glance.

“I didn't know,” Keaton continues. “And I didn't know that he left after he got home that night. And that Nina was over there. I don't…” He takes in a breath and makes a fist. I lean back, away from him, just a tiny bit.

He stares at me in this open, sympathetic way that makes me uncomfortable. I wish he'd go back to looking like he's about to murder me.

“You really don't remember that night, do you?” he asks quietly.

“
I think about the way the knife went into his throat every night
,” she whispers in my ear. “
It's like my own personal lullaby
.”

“No,” I say.

“Did you think Lucy was lying?” Emmett asks, with genuine curiosity.

“Of course I did! We all did.”

“I didn't.” He says it matter-of-factly, and maybe I'm an idiot, but I believe him.

“Well, good for you, Sunshine, but the rest of us were skeptical. But now…” He shakes his head and takes a drink of his beer.

I lean forward, folding my arms on the table. It's damp and sticky with beer. “Keaton, are you trying to
apologize
to me?”

“No.” He runs a hand over his mouth. “Fuck, I don't know. But you know what I do know? I know both Matt and Nina well, and neither of them said shit to me about being out that night. They didn't say shit to anyone. And that doesn't sit right.”

Ben wants to meet at Grandma's again, and he's waiting for me on the porch when I pull up in front of the tiny pink house. He strolls over to me as I get out of the car, tossing his dark hair out of his eyes in a way that seems practiced. Like he rehearsed being sexy in a mirror.

“Why are you always here?” I ask.

“I'm not always here.”

“You're not fucking me
and
my grandma, are you? That would really bum me out.”

“I am not fucking your grandma. Honestly, I don't think Beverly could fit me into the rotation. She has a lot of men coming around.” His tone is teasing, and I step away from him when it looks like he's going to lean in. I'd rather my grandma not know about this particular poor life choice.

“Come on.” I head toward the house. “It feels like Satan's asshole out here.”

He follows me into the house, where he's already set up his podcasting equipment on the table. Grandma is on the couch, scrolling through her phone. She wears an old, faded T-shirt tucked into a full red skirt, and I marvel again at how much cooler my grandma is than I am.

“Is this now our designated interview spot?” I plop down in one of the chairs.

“It's quiet. And Beverly doesn't mind.” He smiles at her. I was only half kidding when I asked whether they were fucking.

“He likes that you're more relaxed here,” Grandma says without looking up from her phone.

Ben appears startled, like that was something that Grandma inferred on her own.

I take it back. My grandmother is too smart to sleep with Ben Owens. It's too bad common sense isn't genetic.

“I was hoping we could delve deeper into your relationship with Nina today.” Ben slides into the seat next to me.

I sigh, looking past his head, out the window to the empty field behind the house. A breeze blows through the tall weeds. Ben looks over his shoulder and then back at me.

I haven't told him about my conversation with Keaton and Emmett. He doesn't know that Matt and Nina are still sleeping together.

I haven't told Ben a lot of things about Nina.

“
She yelled at me while I was holding a knife
,” Savvy whispers in my ear. “
She probably wouldn't have done that if she knew all the fun things I've done with knives
.”

I laughed when she said that to me. I can't even remember exactly why Nina and Savvy didn't like each other. I'm not even sure that anyone besides me knows how much they truly despised each other.

“Lucy?” Ben says.

Nina didn't like Savvy. So what? I don't like lots of people. It never seemed relevant.

It still probably isn't relevant. And if I say it, I'm doing to Nina what they all did to me—making accusations that will haunt her forever. I should lie, or dance delicately about the truth, like the other people Ben has interviewed have done.

Because she couldn't have done it. My brain isn't letting that scenario even take shape in my head. I've imagined killing so many
people, and yet I can't put an object in Nina's hand and watch her smash it against Savvy's head.

“Hon?” Grandma touches my arm. She and Ben are hovering, looking at me with concern.

“I don't want to,” I say softly.

The wrinkles around Grandma's eyes crinkle as she squints at me. “You don't want to what?”

“I don't want to talk about Nina.”

“But she—” Ben starts.

“Can you just give me a day?” I push a hand through my hair. “Surely you have something else we can talk about today.” A text message pops up on my phone, and I angle the screen toward me so I can read it. My stomach drops to my feet. “Fuck.”

“What?” Grandma asks.

“The internet figured out that I'm Eva Knightley.”

Listen for the Lie Podcast with Ben Owens

EPISODE 6—“NINA”

When I first reached out to her, Nina Garcia was hesitant to talk to me.

Nina:
             Yeah, I don't know. I felt weird about it.

Ben:
               Weird?

Nina:
             Yeah, you know … this case has already gotten a lot of attention. Everyone knows that Lucy—

Ben:
               Everyone knows that Lucy…?

Nina:
             Um. Everyone
thinks
that Lucy did it. But I was talking to Emmett—you know Emmett, right? Me and Lucy and him were all best friends in high school?

Ben:
               Yeah, we've talked.

Nina:
             He thought I should. I just feel bad because I like … I didn't really even know Savvy.

Ben:
               You two went to high school together. In a pretty small town.

Nina:
             Sure, but we didn't like … hang out.

Ben:
               Okay. But you knew Lucy well. This podcast is as much about her as it is about Savannah. And I've heard you know Matt fairly well?

Nina:
             I mean, a little, I guess. We're friendly.

Ben:
               Why don't we start at the beginning. What was Lucy like—

Nina:
             I'm sorry, can we stop for a minute?

Ben:
               Why?

Nina:
             I just … I need a minute.

Nina was frequently nervous in our interviews, which isn't unusual. Talking about the murder of someone you knew—even just casually—is difficult. I know this.

But when I began going through her interviews, I found some inconsistencies. Here's Stephanie Gantz again.

Ben:
               I found this yearbook photo. Of Nina and Savannah?

Stephanie:
     Oh yeah, that's junior year, I think?

Ben:
               They were on student council together?

Stephanie:
     Yeah.

Ben:
               I've heard they didn't really know each other.

Stephanie:
     I wouldn't say that. They weren't friends. I think they fought over a boy once, like freshman year? Ugh. I hate that, but we were young. The feminism hadn't kicked in yet.

Ben:
               Sure. So, they didn't like each other, then?

Stephanie:
     It wasn't anything dramatic by that point, but no, not really.

Ben:
               By that point?

Stephanie:
     There was definitely some drama freshman year.

Ben:
               What kind of drama?

Stephanie:
     Just … like I said, there was a boy. I think Savvy … I think she sort of mean-girled Nina a bit. It blew over, and Savvy wasn't like that at all later, but, you know. We were fourteen.

Ben:
               Did Lucy know there was history with Nina and Savannah?

Stephanie
:     She must have. Nina was her best friend back then.

Ben:
               Did you think it was weird, when Lucy became such good friends with Savannah later?

Stephanie:
     Nah, we were all adults by that point. If you're going to hold grudges about things from when you were a kid, you're gonna spend your whole life angry, you know?

Ben:
               Do you know how Nina felt about it?

Stephanie:
     Uh … she might have said something catty about it.

Ben:
               So Nina
was
holding grudges from when she was a kid?

Stephanie:
     Maybe. Yeah.

It only takes a couple of hours for the reviews of all three of my books to be flooded with people calling me a murderer. Now, when you scroll down to read what people think of my fluffy fake-dating rom-com, the first thing you see is “
THIS IS WRITTEN BY LUCY CHASE, THE WOMAN WHO MURDERED HER BEST FRIEND
.”

So, that's unfortunate.

Ben gives me a worried look as I leave my grandma's house after the interview, but I don't have the energy to deal with his feelings right now. Technically, this is all his fault.

Several times I imagine mowing him down with my car. I feel like I deserve credit for not doing it.

I drive straight to Nina's house. I'm showing up unannounced, which is a real dick move, especially since she has kids, but I've lost all my fucks. I have no more to give.

She answers the door with a rightfully annoyed expression. This is what she gets for inviting me over. There are real benefits to not letting me know where you live.

She's in sweats, her hair up in a haphazard ponytail with a giant piece sticking up in the middle. She rests her head against the side of the door, like even standing here is too much effort.

“I've had a really shitty day, Lucy,” she says.

“
I know you two were like BFFs in high school, but I swear to god, that woman is such a stuck-up bitch
,” Savvy rudely declares in my head. I'd pushed back a little on that one. Told her that Nina came off as aloof sometimes, but she was actually very nice.

“Well, I've had a shitty five years, so how about you give me ten minutes?” I counter.

She sighs, glancing over her shoulder to where an animated show is playing on the television, the kids on the couch in front of it. She steps out onto the porch, closing the door behind her.

“I'm not doing another interview with Ben,” she said. “I texted him no a few hours ago.”

“Smart choice.”

She eyes me. “What's that supposed to mean?”

“I mean that you're about to take my place as the cheating, lying whore suspected of murder, so nothing good can come of that interview.”

She pales, and stutters before she's able to get a word out. “You don't think that
I
killed Savvy?”

I don't, but I just shrug.

“The thing with Matt and me—”

“I don't care.”

“I didn't do it on purpose. He was just always there and my ex and I were always fighting.”

“Seriously, I don't care. I would have cared back then, but I can't really muster the energy at the moment. I would recommend you stop, considering what we just heard from Julia.”

She leans against the side of the house, exhaustion on her face. “I didn't know. It was never really more than sex with me and Matt, so we never fought or…” She swallows hard. “I'm an idiot.”

“I mean, I married him.”

Her eyes shift to mine and then quickly away. She wants to say something in response to that, but is clearly holding it back.

I wonder what else she's been holding back.

“Did you hook up with Colin?” I ask.

“Is there a woman in this town who hasn't hooked up with Colin Dunn? Even your mother slept with him.”

“But were you with him while he was dating Savvy?”

“No, before, but we both know that Colin and Savvy weren't exclusive.” She raises an eyebrow. “Savvy got around more than Colin, if I remember correctly. Funny how the podcast conveniently leaves that out.”

Savvy appears on the porch, mouth open in mock anger, like she's insulted. “
Excuse me, are you trying to imply that I was a slut? I told you I never liked this bitch
.”

“Why did you go see Matt, the night of the wedding?” I ask, ignoring her.

“I was drunk. It was stupid.”

I wait, but she doesn't elaborate.

“I
would never sleep with your husband, for the record
,” Savvy says. “
Because I'm a good friend, but also because you have terrible taste in men
.”

“Oh, you're one to talk,” I snap.

And I realize, too late, that I've said that out loud.

Nina freezes, slowly looking over her shoulder to where I've just spoken to my imaginary friend.

“Are you … okay?” she asks hesitantly.

I flush. “I'm fine. What did your stupid drunk brain want with Matt that night?”

“I…” She pushes a hand through her hair with a sigh. “I knew you two were at the wedding that night, and I decided I was going to go over there and make a scene so that you would know I was sleeping with Matt. He'd been talking big about leaving you, and I was going to force the issue. I went over there and waited.”

“What happened when he got there?”

“I asked where you were, and he just started screaming at me to go home. Barely even let me get a word out.”

“So he was upset? Or angry?”

“Yeah. I figured it was because he could tell what I was doing, waiting outside his house like that. I just started apologizing and left.”

“Was he … I don't know, disheveled? Dirty?”

She takes a step back, putting her hand on the doorknob in preparation to flee this conversation. “Matt didn't kill Savvy. I know him. He didn't kill her.”

I cock an eyebrow. “You know him so well that you didn't realize he was beating the shit out of his wife?”

Her face hardens. She says nothing.

“Why is everyone so eager to jump to Matt's defense, but the entire town immediately decided I was a murderer?”

“First of all, Matt wasn't covered in Savvy's blood. And second of all, I defended you on that podcast.”

“I know you did. And I thought it was because we used to be friends, but I think it's more that you felt guilty for sleeping with Matt. Am I close?”

“Go fuck yourself, Lucy.” She walks into her house and slams the door.