Lori Brighton - [The Seduction 02] (37 page)

“No.” He brushed her hair from her face and kissed her forehead.

God, he loved her. Loved her brilliant hair and freckles. Loved the fact that she believed in every lost person…believed in him. Loved the fact that she did not simper and blush like a virgin but told him directly that she wanted him. She wanted him.
Him.

“Although, I have been stabbed a few times.”

She turned her head toward him. “What a sad pair we are.” Her lashes were drifting down again, a flutter of butterfly wings, and his worry returned. “Don’t leave me.”

“Never,” he whispered. “Rest easy.”

She inched her fingers forward, resting her hand on his thigh. “Lay beside me.”

He hesitated, wanting desperately to hold her but afraid of hurting her. Damn it all, he wanted to bring her close, wanted to press his lips to hers and taste her. Most of all, he wanted to promise that she would never hurt again.

“Please,” she whispered drowsily.

Slowly, he lowered himself to the bed, lying upon his side and facing her. He rested close enough that she could draw comfort from his heat but not so close as to harm her. With lazy strokes, he smoothed the hair from her face. “Tell me the truth, are you well?”

“Yes, Gideon.” She lifted her lids just enough to meet his gaze. The soft smile upon her lips wavered, her eyes growing dark. It was too good to be true, yet here the world was…offering him riches beyond his wildest dreams.

“The baby?”

He swallowed hard. One more gift, just one more, he prayed. “Fine, right now.”

She nodded. His hands curled into the fine sheets as he resisted the urge to hold her. She understood that in this world nothing was certain. “Kiss me.”

His body heated at the mere thought, and he was ashamed of himself for wanting her when she was so ill. Ashamed of trapping her in marriage to a whore, a murderer. “Elizabeth, I’ve done horrible, wretched things in my life.”

Somehow she found his hand and entwined her fingers through his. “Kiss me.”

She obviously hadn’t heard him. Or maybe it was the medicine making her daft. “I don’t deserve you.” He trailed his fingers over her hair and down the side of her face. Her breathing deepened, her lashes lowered. Ever so carefully, he leaned over and pressed a kiss to the bridge of her nose. She would survive because she was strong and healthy and full of life.

“Swear you won’t ever do anything so foolish again,” he demanded in a harsh whisper.

“Of course I won’t promise you that.” The corners of her lips lifted, her eyes still closed. “I love you.”

He almost sighed, the words like a warm blanket wrapping around his heart. She loved him. He didn’t deserve her. He’d probably only bring them pain, but at the moment he held those words close and savored them.

“Did you mean what you said?” she whispered. “Or did you merely say the words because you thought I was dying?”

Gideon’s brows drew together, confused. “What did I say?”

Just when he was sure she slept, her lashes slowly lifted. Her eyes were still dull with the medicine, but she seemed quite determined to stay awake. “Do you…love me?”

Gideon released a wry chuckle. “Is that what you’re worried about?”

She frowned, her eyes closing once more. “Rather terrible of you to laugh at a woman on her deathbed.”

“Elizabeth, you silly woman.” He gently cupped the side of her face and leaned closer to her. “I thought you knew. Hell, of course I love you.”

And he would never tire of saying the words.

“How would I know?” she muttered, sounding quite put out. “You’ve never said as much.”

“Perhaps not, but haven’t you ever noticed the way I look at you? Haven’t you ever noticed the fact that I can’t stop touching you?”

She slid her hand up his chest, pressing her fingers to the spot of skin that showed at his open collar. “But you’ve been away for so long, locked in Mr. Ashton’s study.”

“Elizabeth, I shut myself away because I knew that if I was around you, I’d never get anything done. I had to see the paperwork taken care of in case anything happened to me. I had to find out the truth.”

A small smile lifted the corners of her mouth. She turned her head and pressed her face against his shoulder. “Really?”

“Yes, now go to sleep, my love.”

She nodded, the top of her head bumping his chin. “I thought…I thought you didn’t really want to be married, that you didn’t want the baby…”

“Stop,” he whispered, leaning down to kiss her gently on the lips. For the first time in his life he felt at peace. He wasn’t going to
give it up anytime soon. “You’ve given me everything I could ever want. I was just so bloody scared because it was too perfect. You saved me. You saved my soul.”

“No,” she said, the word coming out mumbled. “You saved yourself. You chose to believe. You chose to live.”

Her hand slipped inside his shirt, her fingers resting over his heart.

“Will you stay, Gideon? Will you be part of our family?” Her voice was barely a murmur and he knew she was practically asleep. “Promise you won’t leave.”

“Why would I leave,” he whispered next to her ear, “when I’ve finally come home? Now go to sleep, dream peaceful dreams, and I will be here when you wake. Forever.”

Spring was Gideon’s favorite season. It was a time that came quite quickly, surprisingly, yet favorably. One day the weather was cold and bitter, and then when you least expected it, the scent of lilacs, rain, and hope would suddenly fill the air. Aye, the winter might sneak back a time or two, biting and growling, but spring’s gentle hand would soothe away the beast’s ire, and the sun would shine merrily, teasingly, and all would be well once more.

He leaned his head back against the chair next to the hearth. It was too warm to have a fire, and the gentle breeze wafting through the open windows brought with the sweet sensation of life. Considering they rarely had guests, their formal parlor had been turned into a sort of playroom for the children.

Tin soldiers lined the window seat and fireplace mantel, keeping guard. A few dolls lay scattered across the floor, and his daughter slept sprawled upon a blanket in the middle of the room. One minute she’d been laughing merrily, the next she’d slumped
to the floor like a drunken sailor. He was constantly surprised by his child’s love and interest in the world around her. She found everything utterly fascinating. And he found her fascinating.

“Do you think they’ll like me?” Elizabeth asked, standing near the open windows.

He thought it a ridiculous question. How could anyone not like her? The clean spring breeze swept into the room, fluttering the yellow curtains and her light green gown. He gave her a wry grin, although she had her back to him and didn’t notice. Her vulnerability touched his heart. There was never a dull moment between them. He loved to watch her hips sway when she walked. The husky sound of her laugh. Even the way she ate, savoring every bite as if she’d never eat again.

And yes, he even loved the way she nervously peeked between the curtains to spy on their approaching guests. They’d fallen into a comfortable and welcome routine. He’d taken over the business end of things soon after their marriage, with Mr. Smith acting as property manager. But it was Elizabeth he went to for advice. They’d spent many a cold night cuddled in bed or on the settee before a roaring fire discussing their next business ventures.

“Do you truly care if they like you?” he asked.

“Of course I care.” She turned and gave him a blinding smile that showed off her dimples.

His heart tripped in his chest. “I know it’s ridiculous, but we have so few good friends, and I would desperately like one who understood our pasts,” she said. She straightened a vase of daffodils situated on a nearby table. “Grace and I have been writing for over a year now, and we get along quite well on paper. I just hope it’s not awkward when we meet. They’re your friends, after all, and I want them to like me.”

Hardly his friends, but he kept his mouth shut, not wishing to disappoint her.

Childish laughter from outside the windows quickly drew her attention. “I do hope Henry and Cally are keeping their clothing clean.”

Gideon grew thoughtful as he watched her move away from the windows and anxiously stroll the room, picking up stray toys and placing them in baskets, although they had a maid to do such things. He worried that the relationship she craved with Grace might not come pass. Just because he and Alex had lived at Lady Lavender’s didn’t mean they were friends. He didn’t want her feelings to be crushed.

Still, Alex was charming and what he knew about Grace was hopeful. The visit would go well, but would they wish to remain in contact as Elizabeth so desperately wanted? He stood and went to her. Was she lonely out here in the country? Most people would be. He wrapped his arm around her waist and drew her back against him, kissing her sensitive neck. She grinned, shivering. No, he didn’t deserve her. But now that he had her, he sure as hell wasn’t going to let go. He would do whatever it took to keep her happy.

“You deserve friends, you deserve balls and gatherings and tea with women of your station.”

“My station? You mean the maids?” Elizabeth laughed. “Could you imagine me at a ball? No thank you. I much prefer the country life to London. I much prefer our happy jaunts to the sea rather than the smoke-filled air of the city.”

He read only truth in her words, but he still felt guilty that they had to hide away because of him. He knew it was very likely that someday the world would uncover the truth about his past. But for now he would live for this day and enjoy the peace.

“We have been planning this visit for over a year, you know. But first I was in confinement, and then dear Grace.” She touched her fingers to the necklace of silver and pearly shell pieces that Grace and her sister had made and sent to her for Christmas. It looked like the moon and stars, a pretty trinket. “I do hope the rain holds off.”

“It will.”

She cupped the sides of his face and stood on tiptoe, pressing her mouth gently to his. “You’re always so hopeful.”

“Always.”

They both grinned, and he knew she was thinking about a time in the not-so-distant past when he was anything but hopeful. She rested the side of her face against his chest, and they grew silent and contemplative, staring out upon the gravel drive. He didn’t want to let her go…ever. Gideon settled his chin atop her head and breathed in her sweet scent. The two years they’d been married had gone by in a blink. But he wanted more with her. So very much more. Damn it, he wanted forever.

“I’ve been thinking…”

He sighed. “Lass, whenever you start a sentence like that, tis never good news.”

She slid her arms around his waist, molding her lush body to his. The chit was trying to distract him, and it was working. “It’s been almost two years; we should invite the dowager and John here for our next Christmas.”

He tried very hard to ignore the anger that coursed through his veins. Elizabeth was much too kindhearted. She could have forgiven Satan himself. “Are you mad?”

She flushed. “I still feel guilty about blaming the dowager for murder. And John, well, he had nothing to do with any of this. Gideon, he’s your brother. Mr. Smith said they’re rarely seen in public anymore. Quite a sad state.”

He released his hold and strolled across the room toward their daughter, needing the comfort of her innocent face. How could Elizabeth even think he’d want that bitter hag in his house? He knelt down and brushed the red curls from Lucy’s flushed face. Elizabeth swore the child’s hair would darken, but Gideon adored her brilliant locks. Aye, the child was as beautiful as her mother, but she had his gray eyes at least.

“We had the same father, nothing more.”

She sighed. “Very well.”

But he knew the woman well enough to know that by Christmas, the dowager and John would be visiting. The bond he
and Elizabeth shared had strengthened into something unbreakable. He felt as if he had cheated life in some way by capturing her and he swore he would never give her back. They knew each other deeply, accepted each other without question. Most importantly, they respected each other wholly.

Henry and Cally raced by the windows once more, and Miss Olson, gray skirts hiked above trim ankles, ran after them. The poor governess had a difficult time keeping up with the two, especially now that they were older. They were so very much like him and his sister that seeing them made him feel as if she was here…in Cally’s laughter and Henry’s mischievousness.

The crunch of wheels over gravel sent Elizabeth racing to the windows, her breath coming out in excited pants. “They’ve arrived.”

Gideon hid his grin, amused that she was so excited to meet a former whore and impoverished farmer’s daughter.

As if on cue, Lucy stirred to life, blinking those gray eyes wide. “Mama? Papa?”

Her little voice made his heart sing. Elizabeth spun around and rushed to the blanket.

“Hello, darling!” She lifted the child to her feet and smoothed down her ruffled blue gown. “Did you have a nice nap?”

Lucy mumbled something indecipherable, giggling after she said the words only she could understand. Elizabeth scooped up the child and smothered her round face with kisses until Lucy was squirming. No matter what, she always had time for the children. Gideon was content to merely stand there and watch them interact. There was nothing more beautiful than Elizabeth holding his child.

“I daresay we should meet our guests.” She turned to him, her eyes glowing with love and happiness. “Ready?”

He placed a hand on her back, leading her into the foyer and offering her the comfort of his touch. As they’d yet to replace their inept butler, Gideon opened the door just as the carriage drew to a
stop. Never had he particularly cared about what others thought, but he felt oddly anxious to see Alex.

He’d taken on the role of husband, father, and lord quite quickly. Although he adored his new station, at times he still felt as if he dreamt, as if he didn’t quite belong. With Alex’s arrival came the past he had desperately tried to forget.

He pushed aside depressing thoughts as Henry and Cally found them, their excitement just as palpable as Elizabeth’s. Hell, they acted as if it was Christmas morning. Will appeared at the top of the steps, heading toward the carriage with a practiced ease. At least they had one proper servant. The lad was doing better, although he still mourned the loss of his friend Benjie. Elizabeth had set up an account in the lad’s name so his family would never suffer. But Gideon knew no amount of money could take the place of a loved one.