Lost and Found (10 page)

She wondered how he liked living
off the grid
on this island with no
utilities
, no modern conveniences. Love did strange things to people
,
and she knew Marcie would never live anywhere else—except her
granny’s
cabin.

They’d come a long way from when Sam first met Marcie, when she was attacked and robbed in
the
New Orleans airport.
Then while
she was recovering from a head injury,
Marcie,
Sam, Maggie, Richard, and Diane came together, unlikely friends
,
to battle and outwit a cowardly predator
and
a threat to each of them. Dan McKenzie, her husband’s partner
,
and at the time
,
Marcie’s lover. A man of deception—a man who preyed on the weak and vulnerable. God
,
how she hated him.

Maggie didn’t want to speak
;
she’d always hated small talk. Maybe that’s why Sam was so quiet. They bumped along over the
rutted
dirt road, thick trees surrounded each side of the road as they made their way inward to the west side
,
an isolated part of the island, to Marcie’s
granny’s
cabin.

Sam cleared his throat when he pulled down the long dirt driveway. The bushes scraped the side of the jeep. “You’ve no idea how surprised Marcie and I were to hear from you. Are you going to stay for a bit?”
He
parked in front of the cabin.

“No
,
I need to get back tonight, so I can only stay a few hours. I need to be on the last ferry.”

He didn’t reply,
only nodded before climbing out of the Jeep. Wisps of smoke rose from the chimney.
She
followed
him
up the brand new wood steps and inside the quaint log cottage.

Marcie was sitting in an old rocker by the wood
stove, humming a lullaby to her five
-
month
-
old baby girl. Kyla cooed and giggled
as
she reached up with tiny fingers to touch her mother’s lips. Maggie wiped her feet on the mat and stared at the boots and shoes crammed on the wood shoe rack by the door to try and steady
the
unsettled confusion
filling
her. Sam gently gripped Maggie’s upper arms
and
then skirted around her. Maggie didn’t move, but
she
glanced at the door when the thought to bolt and make her own way back to the ferry appealed
to her so strongly it
frightened her.

“Maggie
,
how are you?” Marcie rose from the rocking chair and handed Kyla to Sam. Marcie didn’t hesitate as she strode in her long dark skirt to Maggie and hugged her in a way
that made her
want to weep. “Can you stay for dinner?”

Marcie stepped back holding both of
her
hands. Maggie didn’t answer. She couldn’t because Marcie was watching her as if she could read her every secret and knew why she was really here.

“You
’
r
e
shaking
.
What’s
going on? Come sit.” Marcie spoke so kindly. She didn’t deserve this welcome. Not from Marcie
.
Not
after the cruel words she shouted
at Marcie
the day of the funeral,
you don’t deserve a child after what you brought into our lives
.

Sam stood
in
the kitchen
,
as still as a man could holding a baby, and stared at
her
as if he too knew what was really going on.

Maggie wanted to cry, and her face heated with shame. She pulled her hands free from Marcie and shoved them in the pockets of her down coat. When she glanced up
,
she didn’t miss the uneasy look that passed between Sam and Marcie. She fisted her hands to stop the trembling. Her heart was hammering so hard she wondered if they could hear.

“I’ll get you some tea. Maggie come and sit here.” Marcie pulled out the kitchen chair and patted the back.

“I’m okay… I don’t need any tea.”

“My granny used to say there’s nothing better to soothe away your worries than a steamy cup of tea.” Marcie filled a teapot from the black kettle on the wood
stove. She reached for two
mugs on the narrow shelf by the sink and placed them on the kitchen table. She poured the hot tea and placed a mug in front of Maggie
,
scooting a chair up beside her.

The wood
stove heated the kitchen, and love filled this cabin. But it did little to alleviate
h
er
overwhelming emptiness.
She
placed her hands on the table, but couldn’t bring herself to touch the hot mug.

“It’s so good to see you
,
Maggie
.
I was just saying to Sam the other day how much I miss you guys. When you called and said you were coming, well… I’m happy to hear from you, but Maggie…” She stopped.

A few seconds of silence passed before Maggie realized Marcie wasn’t talking.
She
glanced at Marcie
,
and
when she saw
her brows furrowed and
how
her light blue eyes took on a seriousness she’d not seen before, she wondered if they’d ask her to leave.

“We’re worried about you.” Sam rubbed his daughters back and stood behind Marcie.

Something squeezed her chest
,
making
it hard to breathe
,
and her sound reasoning slipped away
,
and
she wanted to scream. They were judging her. She could feel their disdain. She scraped her chair back and stood. “Richard called you, didn’t he?” She couldn’t keep the bitterness from
blurting
out.

Marcie started to say something
,
stopped
,
and glanced at Sam.

“Maggie
,
you’re in trouble. I don’t know what you came looking for. But what you’re going to get is help.” Sam placed Kyla in Marcie’s arms, his hand lingering on
her
shoulder for just a bit, before stepping around the table toward Maggie.
As he moved,
the way
he watched
the mother of his child had her
envying
Marcie for what she had with Sam. He was a good man. He touched Maggie’s arm as if she was wild horse ready to spook. “Maggie…”

She heard f
ootsteps
clambering
up the steps. Someone knocked
, the door opened
,
and
Richard stepped in. His steel blue
gaze
latched onto Maggie
,
and she knew without a doubt
,
the
shaky tower she’d constructed around her heart had just crumbled.

“You called him. How could you do that to me?”

Marcie flushed and rested a sleeping Kyla against her shoulder. “Maggie sit
back
down, you need some help. Look at you
,
you’re shaking. Your forehead’s covered with beads of sweat. I bet right now your muscles ache. You haven’t eaten anything have you?
You’re
nauseous right? Your eyes…” Marcie eased back her chair and stood
up
beside Sam.

Maggie clutched at her chest through her bulky coat and stepped back until she bumped into the small framed archway that lead into the front room. She needed to get out of here. But Richard blocked the only
exit
.
The way
they were watching her was freaking her out. So she shut her eyes. Her ears were buzzing.

“Maggie
,
” Richard called out to her.

She opened her eyes
,
but her vision blurred from tears she didn’t even know she shed. She staggered when the room swayed
,
and her heart thumped harder against her ribs.

“Maggie, you’re not getting any more of those damn pills or anything else. You were taking
them
more than what you told me. Every day. Weren’t you?” Richard sounded so angry.

She covered her face, unable to speak past the dryness in her throat. She couldn’t fight him anymore. “Please don’t take Ryley away from me
,
”
she
begged and let her arms fall to her side. She didn’t have the energy to fight. Her skin felt so irritated, she rubbed her arm
,
and the nausea and sweating worsened. She shoved her hands in her coat pocket
s
hoping she had an Ativan stashed, even though she’d searched every pocket and purse twice already.
She hoped to find a
sleeping pill
too. She
needed
one
to take her out of this world to a dreamless void of non-existence. To erase the pain she still refused to face.

Richard stepped in front of her, blocking Sam and Marcie
,
and pulled her into his arms. Just like yesterday, but this time
,
they
just
stood together while he rubbed her back,
and
then her arms, in slow even circles up and down.
This
time when she leaned into him
,
something
cracked
the
shaky layer
around her heart
as a whimper escaped
,
and she crammed her fist in her mouth to stifle her sob.

She clutched his shirt. “Richard I hurt
…
I’m so tired. I can’t stop shaking. I can’t fight you.”

“Shhh baby, I’ll get you through this.”

“Damn you, why are you doing this to me? Please just give me something to make this hurt stop.”

Unable to keep up the charade, Maggie sobbed and held onto Richard
,
and for the first time in a very long time, realized she wouldn’t be alone.

The late morning sun streamed through the cathedral window on this unusually warm winter day. Maggie sat cross-legged on the cushioned window seat in the sunroom Richard built as an addition onto their house. Maggie sighed as she stared out at the acres of thick forest and
the
Mount Olympus part of Olympic National Park.

Maggie couldn’t remember ever being so tired. She shut her eyes as she leaned against the stack of fluffy pillows.
After bringing her home, after a rough first night at Sam and Marcie’s, it had been
a week of night sweats, insomnia, vomiting, and cramping muscles—and Richard never left her side. She’d begged them, each one of them
,
for something to ease her ache. But each had been unbending as they got her through that hellish first night. Sam boiled her water to drink and explained
the
details of how she was dependent physically and psychologically on these drugs.
And he told her over and over she needed to understand what her body was physically going through. And why
the brain receptors become less sensitive to the
drugs
’
effects, and soon she needed more and more for the same effect. How her quality of sleep
was
reduced,
and why the next day
she’d experience drowsiness and cognitive slowing, like a hangover, which is even
worse
than sleep deprivation. Marcie rubbed her back and reminded her she’d be okay, she was strong
,
and she’d get through this. But it was Richard who never left
;
he yelled. He was adamant
,
a steel wall of support
,
cutting through her
foggy
reasoning until she let go and leaned on him.

The next morning
,
Sam and Richard returned on the ferry, taking
her
home to the Gardiner
acreage
. Richard held her outside on the
desk of the
passenger ferry as she vomited over the side of the small ferry at least a half dozen times. Ryley had stayed overnight at a friend
’
s. Sam gathered a few of Ryley’s belongings and hopped on the first ferry back to Las Seta with Ryley. Diane picked up Daisy from Maggie’s house in town.