Lost in Mist and Shadow: A Between the Worlds Novel (6 page)

She shook her head, running her hands across his chest. “No. I mean sometimes I’m there for just a moment and then I pull back,” her eyes jumped to his looking for a reaction, worried she’d said too much, “if you are feeling a strong emotion it gets my attention.”

“So,” he said, grabbing her hand and directing it lower, “I can get your attention if I’m focusing on an intense emotion?”

She felt herself blushing, flustered, thinking
Again? Already?
But out loud she said “You have my attention now.”

He smiled, rolling her over, “Good.”

***************************************

Allie still had her earlier conversation with Liz on her mind when she pulled back up to the house later that afternoon. It was easier to dwell on Liz’s question about whether she could break her spellbond with Jess than to think about the situation with Jess itself, which seemed untenable and also impossible to change. He wanted her to live with him and she didn’t want to give up her life – but she also didn’t want to stop seeing him. On the other hand she didn’t want their relationship to become nothing but a series of assignations between long separations either, and today’s visit had done nothing to reassure her on that front. She also couldn’t deny that seeing him had made her feel better than she’d felt in a long time and that the boost she got empathically from being with him - if she was brutally honest with herself from feeding on his emotions – was amazing. Despite the fact that her visit to the Outpost hadn’t changed anything she felt almost giddy as she pulled into her usual parking spot in front of the house. She had forgotten in the weeks they’d been apart how wonderful it felt to draw on his emotions for her own energy and strength and she had to admit it was tempting to think of accepting his offer just so she could always feel like she did now.

When she walked in the door of the house, still a bit euphoric, Liz was standing in the hallway with a stranger, gesturing towards the living room expansively and saying something about how much room there was. Her voice was unusually warm and bubbly for Liz, and it made Allie tense despite her own good mood. As soon as she saw the door opening Liz turned towards it; the expression on her face reminded Allie of when they’d been in high school and Liz had been trying to impress the other popular kids: fake and overeager.

“This is Shawn, he’s going to be moving in to fill the spare room,” Liz said smiling widely at the stranger. “He works with me at the theater – he’s an actor! – and his old roommate packed it in and moved back to regular earth, so he couldn’t keep up with the place he was at. And I said I had a room open, and viola, here he is.”

Liz sounded exuberant as she spoke, and Allie had to fight to keep her face neutral as her cousin fawned over the new arrival. Allie guessed he was in his mid-20’s. A bit under six feet with a medium build, brown eyes and brown hair that fell to just above his shoulders; he was wearing jeans and a black turtleneck, and oozed artist. His smile was friendly but there was something overly cheerful in his face that made Allie uneasy, although she thought perhaps he was merely putting on his stage persona to meet new people. She knew from the times she’d gone with Liz to the theater that many of the actors were actually very insecure; after only a moment’s hesitation she extended her senses to read his emotions. Normally she wrestled with the ethics of using her ability to read people but since this person was going to be living with her this time felt justified. She found a mix of excitement, nervous tension, and fear, all of which could be explained by his own worry about fitting in with the established roommates.

“Well it was hard to resist,” Shawn said looking around in open curiosity, “after Lizzie told me about how tricked out this place was.”

Lizzie?
Allie thought, amused, “Yeah, we do have all the electrical stuff most people don’t. We’ve even got a microwave.”

“A microwave? Really?” he looked suitably impressed at the mention of a bit of earth technology rarely found in the Bordertowns because of the difficulty keeping them running in the magical environment.

“Yeah,” Liz said eagerly, “Allie’s a witch and we have another roommate who’s away right now but he’s also good with magic and he helps out. They keep up with all the enchantments and they deal with any magical issues that come up.”

Shawn looked her over skeptically, “Really? I was kind of worried about being so far out in the woods – I mean you hear about some pretty dangerous stuff roaming around in the less settled areas. It’s good to know you guys have magical security, but, no offense, you don’t look like the sort to be out tackling fairy wolves or whatever.”

Fairy what?
Allie wondered, but before she could ask what a fairy wolf was, if there even was such a thing, Liz was talking again, “Oh Allie’s not as young as she looks, she’s only half human you know, her mother wasn’t, er, she was an elf. And she’s not a really powerful witch but she’s very good at basic stuff and she knows all about the sorts of dangerous creatures we have to deal with.”

Allie couldn’t stop herself from giving Liz a puzzled look, but she nodded and agreed, “I’m no super witch but I’m pretty effective as magical animal control and I can keep all the electrical stuff running.”

To her surprise Shawn stepped forward peering closely at her, “Wow, you’re a half elf? Really? I mean I’ve heard of that sort of thing, but – I mean not that you’re a thing, sorry that came out wrong, just I’ve never met anyone like that, I mean like you before.”

Allie knew she was blushing, suddenly keenly aware that she was wearing a form fitting dress without the usual undergarment and for once not sure if her ears were covered or visible. She hated drawing attention to her mixed heritage and even more to her appearance in general. Although Jess managed to make her forget her self-consciousness when she was with him it all came crashing back as soon as she felt herself under another male’s scrutiny. But she forced the smile to stay fixed in place. “It’s not that big a deal. Really.”
Oh my gods is compulsively saying really contagious?
she thought irrelevantly, trying to find a way out of the awkward turn the conversation had taken. Despite Liz’s earlier attempts to monopolize Shawn’s attention she seemed content now to let Allie deal with him. “You should know though, if being around elves bothers you-“

“Oh no! It doesn’t! Really, I like elves. Elves are cool, “Shawn said smilingly and nodding in a way that reminded Allie oddly of a puppy.

“Right, well, ummm, our other roommate who helps with the magical stuff is an elf. He should be getting back from the trip he’s on pretty soon,” Allie said.

“Really?” Shawn asked, his eyes lighting up with undisguised glee.

“Uh-huh. And we have another roommate – human roommate”
Dear gods I can’t believe I just said that
“who works for the fire department-“

“What does the elf do? You know, for a job?” he interrupted.

Allie floundered slightly, “Ummm, Bleidd? He-“

“Blayth?” Shawn cut in again, “that’s a weird name. I thought elves always had long names with at least three syllables and lots of extra letters.”

He was obviously trying to make a joke but Allie had no idea what to say to that. Liz laughed loudly though, grabbing his arm. “It does seem that way, doesn’t it? Allie’s real name is
Aliaine
.”

“Yeah,” Allie said, stung, “and yours is Elizabeth.”

Liz looked annoyed but Shawn beamed, “I like Ally-awn-yuh, that’s a pretty name,” he said managing to almost pronounce her full name correctly on his first attempt, something very few people could do. And then he hastily added, “So’s Elizabeth. Really. Very regal.”

Liz smiled looking appeased but nonetheless tugged Shawn’s arm, pulling him towards the stairs. Allie felt a lump in her throat realizing that she was doubtless taking him to see Syndra’s room which would be his room now. Her heart rebelled at the idea of anyone else using the space, even though she knew it was irrational to expect Liz to keep the room empty. Liz was already turning away, “Come on, let me show you the rest of the house.”

He followed behind Liz without hesitating but smiled back over his shoulder at Allie. “It was nice meeting you.”

Allie nodded back, unable to think of anything nice to say that wouldn’t be a lie. As soon as they were out of sight she decided to go read out in the yard. It was still a bit chilly even this late in spring but her good mood was lingering despite meeting Shawn and the impending reality of a new roommate. She would rather have run up to her room and changed into something more typical for her, but she didn’t want to hear Liz singing the praises of Syn’s old room. She didn’t want her good day ruined. Her body ached in a pleasant way and she could feel Jess in the back of her mind, similarly enjoying the afterglow of their time together. So she focused on the good feelings, grabbed a cheap paperback off the nearest shelf and headed out to enjoy the nice weather.

*****************************

He fidgeted, watching the sun crawl towards the horizon. In the room behind him he heard the girl groaning softly and he frowned; he wished he could keep this one. She was soft and young and beautiful. And magical in that alluring/repulsive way that consumed him. His own magic was a rough, clumsy thing, something learned by rote. It depended on manipulating energy he could barely sense and trusting that the spells would work because their method was sound. He lacked his own innate ability, but like a blind man painting he could succeed through skill and practice. Not like these magical creatures.
They had no appreciation for the gift they were given,
he thought bitterly.

It almost seemed a waste not to keep her, but then, she was needed for a greater cause. He watched the sun set and the sky fade to a moonless darkness. The streetlights flickered on, illuminating the nearly empty parking lot. Almost time, almost dark enough to move her, and then she would truly serve her purpose.
Oh well,
he thought, trying to console himself even as his excitement grew,
there are always more like her.

Even as he thought it he watched a girl walk past his window who had that certain glimmer, that glow, of Fairy to her. He tensed. She wasn’t as good as the girl bound in his bedroom but she wasn’t bad either. He felt that stirring of interest, the kind that had gotten him in trouble before but was serving a greater good now. As he watched the girl – maybe 14, although it was hard to judge when they weren’t fully human – sat down on the low stonewall bordering the parking lot, directly under a light, and took out a book. He licked his lips. She was alone. It would be so easy…but he already had a girl for tonight….Torn, he took a step towards his door and then stopped.
Should I?
he wondered, as the girl in the bedroom fell silent and time ticked by.

**************************

Allie was dreaming and she knew it. Outside the living room window there was snow on the ground, visible against the darkness, and a fire crackled cheerfully in the fireplace, but the thing that told her this wasn’t real was that Syndra was sitting on the couch in the rumpled t-shirt and sweatpants she always used to wear around the house on her days off. Her short blond hair was loose and her feet were bare; she looked exactly as she had so many mornings when she and Allie had hung out talking and being lazy. Allie felt a surge of raw grief at the familiar sight and quickly turned away, trying to will herself to dream of something else.

“What, no hello? No big hug? I was expecting more Al, after all the effort it took to get you here,” Syndra’s voice was exactly as Allie remembered it and for a moment all she could do was feel her heart racing to hear it – and then the other woman’s words finally registered.

“What? To get me where?”

“To get you here, where you can talk to me,” Syndra said as if that was obvious. “I’ve been trying to come through to you in the waking world for weeks but you refuse to see me. And cut out that sage crap at the store by the way, I can’t go anywhere around that stuff.”

“What?” Allie said again, feeling like she’d been punched in the gut.

“I…have…been…trying…to…talk…to…you,” Syn said slowly as if she were talking to a small child. “But you won’t see me. Won’t acknowledge that I’m there. It’s really fucking obnoxious. Then I realized I can reach you here, in your sleep. Maybe because it’s the only time when your brain isn’t full of stress and drama.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. You’ve got yourself so fucking worked up about everything I’m amazed your head hasn’t popped off. And not even about anything important – you let all the stupid little shit mess up your head but the big stuff gets right by you.”

“Well I’d ask you how you’re doing, but since you’re dead it’s pretty obvious,” Allie snapped.

Syndra’s eyebrows shot up and she barked out a laugh. “Well someone’s gotten a major bitch upgrade since I’ve been gone.”

“This isn’t funny, Syn. You think I want your spirit trapped on earth?”

“Newsflash Al, it’s not all about you.”

“You just said…” Allie started but Syndra cut in, pacing around the living room.

“I said you need to get your head out of your ass, because you do. And that I’ve been trying to get your attention for a while and you won’t let yourself see me which is fucking annoying. But just because I’m here telling you this doesn’t mean you’re the reason I’m stuck here,” Syndra said, waving her hand dismissively.