Love Lessons (33 page)

Need. It was need.

I want Kelly.

I need Kelly.

His heart beat so hard it felt like he was going to have an attack. It wasn’t anything, though, next to the pain of what he realized that fervent beating meant.

I love Kelly.

He would have run, would have gone back down the stairs or into the bathroom, into the fucking street, he felt so shaken, but at that same moment as his revelation, Kelly lifted his gaze to Walter’s, and he smiled. He motioned Walter into the kitchen, and when Walter didn’t come, Kelly went to him, asking his dad to pour coffee, letting Dick know just how Walter liked it. Kelly kept talking, asking if Walter wanted some breakfast casserole or a cinnamon roll, inquiring as to how he slept, was he warm enough, did he have a crick in his neck, should Kelly have made him go to a bed—Walter heard him, but it was just noise in his head. All he could do was stare at Kelly and think,
I want you. I need you. I love you.

I’m terrified.

“Kelly, I think you want to give him a minute to wake up before you chew his ear off,” Dick said, breaking the spell. “You fix him a plate of everything, and I’ll get him settled at the table.”

“Oh.” Kelly blushed, but he smiled too. “Sorry.”

He vanished deeper into the kitchen. Dick came forward, pressed coffee into Walter’s hand and looked him right in the eye.

“Don’t worry, son. We’ll take care of you.”

Walter blinked, stared, and Dick took his arm.

“Table’s this way,” he said, and gently led Walter into the sunshine.

Chapter Twenty-Four

They ended up not going to Minneapolis on New Year’s Eve, partly because of a bad weather system in the forecast, partly because Kelly could tell his parents weren’t into the idea. They would have let Kelly go if he’d pressed, but it would have been because they felt they didn’t want to show Kelly up in front of Walter, and they still would have had their reservations. When Kelly confessed his dilemma, Walter immediately voted to give it up.

“It’s cool.” Walter smiled wryly. “This is the part where I give the tired old line about how it must be nice to have parents who care enough to set limits, and so on.”

“Trust me, it’s not the line that’s tired.” Kelly flopped onto his bed. “It’d be easier if they were hard-asses, because then I could get huffy and rebel. They never do, though. They always look so
concerned
, and they want to talk everything through. Damnedest thing is, usually it’s like this and I say no for them.” He sighed. “I really did want to go, though.”

“We’ll go another time. No sense getting snowed in, and no sense upsetting your family. I like them.” He stretched out beside Kelly and caught his ankle with his foot. “I’ll even go so far as to admit I like the idea of spending New Year’s Eve at home doing stuff like watching movies and playing games.”

The mention of games made Kelly roll his eyes, though he smiled too. Walter and Lisa had a constant game of
something
going, and they always tried to round the rest of the family into playing too. “I warn you, I’m making you watch a Disney movie for every two hours of Monopoly you drag me into.”

“I can live with those terms.” Walter nudged Kelly’s arm. “Hey, actually, we should do that. Plan a movie marathon. You can show me your favorites, and I’ll show you mine.”

Kelly turned to Walter as realization hit him. “I don’t know what your favorite movies are.”

“
Cold Comfort Farm
,
Ocean’s Thirteen
and
Fight Club
.”

“I haven’t seen any of those.”

“That’s it. Movie marathon. What are your three top favorites?”

Kelly considered a moment. “Top three is hard. Hmm. Well, with only
three
, I’d have to say
WALL-E, Tangled
and
French Kiss
.” He glanced at Walter. “Go ahead, make fun.”

If anything, though, Walter looked intrigued. “I heard
WALL-E
was good, so I’m already there on that one.
Tangled
is left field, I’ll admit, though curiosity has me on your hook. But
French Kiss
? Live action? Can you list that and still keep your Disney Princess street cred?”

Kelly swatted him on the arm. “It’s a great movie. So romantic, and funny too. It’s what every romance should be, real and fictional.”

“Then it’s settled. Now all we need is a menu of munchies, copies of the movies and command of the television.”

The only requirement that posed any difficulty was getting Walter’s shows, which he managed by having Tibby overnight them from home. Once all movies were on hand, Walter arranged them on top of the entertainment center in the order they planned to watch them—alternating between the two of them and going in ascending order toward their most favorites. The stack, when viewed as a whole, was completely schizophrenic.

“I look at this, and I can’t believe we’re dating,” Kelly said, staring at it and shaking his head.

“Opposites attract, remember.” Walter clamped a hand on his shoulder. “Come on. Showtime begins in less than twenty-four hours. We have cooking to do.”

It surprised Kelly, though maybe it shouldn’t have, to find that Walter was something of a budding gourmet. He didn’t just make vegan kettle corn, he made vegan kettle corn with cinnamon and vanilla. Together they tried out a vegan-spring-rolls-with-peanut-sauce recipe that apparently Sue had been eyeing. They had trays of vegetables, pita breads and dips, as well as a mini-pizza bar ready. They had a variety of sodas, and when Sue quietly made it known she and Dick had no problem with a bottle of wine or some beer, Walter shrugged this off.

“Oh, no, we’re fine.” Walter licked off a bit of homemade hummus from his thumb and glanced at Kelly. “Unless I’m wrong?”

No, Kelly thought it would be way weird to drink with his parents around. God, what if he got drunk? “I’m fine with soda.”

“Well, I hope you don’t mind if Dick and I have a bottle of champagne,” Sue said, though Kelly knew Walter had just managed to carve himself a whole new point level on the good-boyfriend scale.

“You guys are going to watch with us, right?” Walter asked as he rolled out some pizza dough.

“Oh, maybe some. That many movies in one day will make my head explode.” Sue wiped her hands on some towels. “I wouldn’t mind seeing
Ocean’s Thirteen
though. I missed that when it was in the theaters.”

“That one’s set for the second showing. I’ll let you know when it starts,” Walter promised.

They really did have a schedule too, on a marker board Walter propped up beside the entertainment center. The movies were listed under the heading SHOWTIMES and had little cartoon drawings next to their names giving a visual summary of the plot.

Their first movie was Kelly’s choice:
WALL-E
, which of course had a robot as its doodle. Kelly hadn’t seen the film in a few years, so it had a fresh feeling that thrilled him. Walter seemed to like it too.

“This is actually some pretty cutting cultural commentary,” he observed.

“I love how there’s no dialog for a huge chunk of the movie, but I get so invested every time.” He leaned against Walter’s arm. “The dancing-in-space part is my favorite. It always takes my breath away. I have the soundtrack, and I listen to ‘Define Dancing’ whenever I get depressed.”

The space-dancing scene was as wonderful as ever, and when the movie closed, Kelly felt very, very good.

Ocean’s Thirteen
was next (visual was a pair of dice). Sue came down, and so did Dick, so they watched as a family. Kelly really liked it, and told Walter he’d be open to watching the others in the series sometime.

“We’ll do
Ocean’s Eleven
, though you may want to skip
Twelve
. It’s only okay.” Walter grinned as he changed out the discs. “I love a good heist movie. Plus, the eye candy in this series can’t be beat.”

Kelly had to agree. Matt Damon in particular had him going when he was seducing the manager, even with that stupid fake nose.

They took a short break after that, heading upstairs to stretch their legs. When Sue and Lisa found out
French Kiss
was next, they became excited and ordered the boys to wait for them. Dick went back to the game on the living room TV.

“Wow,” Walter said, as they headed back downstairs with a new round of snacks. “House favorite?”

“Yes,” Kelly admitted. “On many a Friday night when my peers were out getting laid in the back of pickup trucks, I was at home with my mother and sister watching
French Kiss
. I know, the irony bleeds.”

Walter smiled and ruffled his head.

It turned out to be very fun to watch
French Kiss
together, because Lisa and their mom called out favorite lines with him, and their excitement seemed to drag Walter along. When it was over, all four of them walked around in dramatic poses, saying, “I want you,” with bad French accents.

Movie marathons were awesome, Kelly decided. And since they’d started with their least favorite of their favorites, he could only imagine things would get better.

Then Walter put in
Cold Comfort Farm
.

It wasn’t so much that Kelly didn’t like it but that it was weird. It was definitely funny, though a lot of times it was like he had to turn his head sideways to get it. This movie, it turned out, was a Cara and Walter favorite. He texted her several times during the movie—
It’s Urk! He’s ’orrible!
—and when the show finished, Walter kept coming up behind Kelly and saying, in his best Ada Doom voice, “I saw something nasty in the woodshed.” Kelly laughed, but he privately admitted he was glad
Tangled
was next.

Lisa had watched
Cold Comfort Farm
with them, and said she liked it, but she was off to a party of her own by the time
Tangled
got started around nine, and Sue said she wanted to spend some time upstairs with Dick. This meant it was just Kelly and Walter, which was fine with Kelly. This was, hands-down, his
favorite
of his favorites. It was the newest, which had made him suspect at first he’d been attracted to shiny, not calling it his favorite out of merit, but as time had gone on, its appeal had only cemented. He had it on DVD and a digital version on his laptop. He had the soundtrack. Lisa had given him a plush Pascal last Christmas, and it sat prominently on his home dresser—too precious (and embarrassing) to take to school. For this Christmas, she’d given him the
Tangled
boat ride play set, very much a little girl’s toy, but it was already displayed next to Pascal. All the trinkets and music and posters, though, were simply reminders of the main event, which Kelly was about to enjoy again, this time with Walter. He couldn’t wait.

“I feel like I’ve been building up to this for months,” Walter teased as Kelly put the DVD into the player. “It’s the one Disney movie you aren’t embarrassed about liking.”

“Well, it helps that there are huge fan communities, many of them headed by adults. Though mostly I simply love this movie. It makes me so happy.”

“Then fire her up. I want to feel the love,” Walter declared.

Kelly had meant to check Walter’s face to see how he liked it, but he got so caught up he forgot almost until the very end. Just as they escaped Gothel’s castle and went back to reunite Rapunzel with her family, Kelly glanced at Walter.

Walter looked…weird. He was caught up in the film, which was good, but he didn’t look at all like Kelly felt when he watched
Tangled
. He looked very deer-in-the-headlights, like someone had snuck up behind him. He seemed almost wounded, which made no sense because they were at the happy ending. Flynn had a close shave, yes, but he’d made it, and everything was good. Rapunzel was going back to her parents, and they were so fantastic that they didn’t even say a damn word, just looked at her, touched her face and knew she was home.

Oh.

Glancing back at the screen, Kelly saw the king, overcome with emotion, look into his long-lost daughter’s eyes before he gave in to his happiness and embraced her and his wife both. They crouched to the ground, huddled like a unit. It was almost too cheesy, which was why it was so good—
almost
too cheesy. Right at the edge, which made it glorious. Flynn Rider looked on with a rueful smile, accepting the queen’s hand when she held it out to him. Then she pulled him in, making him part of their family puppy pile.

Without turning his head, Kelly shot a glance at his boyfriend.

Walter looked like someone had shot him in the chest, and he had tears in his eyes.

For the first time in the three years he’d been watching it,
Tangled
didn’t make Kelly feel euphoric and free—even after he moved his eyes back to the screen, the memory of how Walter looked echoed in his mind, and it put a pall on the happy ending that hadn’t ever been there before. In fact, things were weird until the cartoon montage over the credits and Grace Potter’s snappy “Something That I Want”. The tension eased, but Kelly still didn’t know how to behave. Should he act like nothing happened? Would that be worse?

Walter solved his dilemma by brushing a kiss against his cheek and murmuring that he had to use the restroom. Kelly continued to listen to the credits, going over various ways to diffuse the awkwardness, but when Walter returned, he was sunny and—mostly—acting like he hadn’t been brought to his knees by a cartoon.