Love Off-Limits (14 page)

“I kissed Matt,” she said.

He lifted his eyebrows. “Wow.” His tone was flat.

She didn't know what she was expecting. Had she expected him to find the biggest rock at the lake and chuck it into the water like a madman? Did she expect him to start crying? Did she expect him to spit on her? She hadn't really expected him to just sit there, silent. She had no idea what he was thinking.

He finally spoke. “That's kind of a dagger.”

“I'm so sorry, Jere. I feel like the worst
person in the world. If you want to hate me, you can. I totally understand.”

He tossed another pebble in the water, then looked at her. “Do you like him?”

It took all her courage, but she managed to nod.

“He's a good guy, Nat.” Then he squeezed her shoulder. “I won't lie, it hurts. I mean, I don't know…he is my best friend.”

“I know. I know exactly what you mean.”

“I only want the best for you, Nat.” He nodded. “And I'd be pissed if you went off and dated some idiot. It's all good.”

She smiled. “Thanks.”

Jeremy walked her to her car. They gave each other one last hug. He felt warm and familiar, and for a moment she felt a flicker of sadness. It felt similar to the last time she had cleaned out her closet. She'd found her favorite old T-shirt that she'd outgrown five years ago. There were so many good memories, but the truth was she knew she had to let it go. She couldn't hold on to it forever just because there were some great memories. When he pulled away, they looked at each other.

“Still friends?” she asked.

“Always.”

It was two days before the dance, and word of the breakup had spread across campus like wildfire.
Natalie had been dumped for Brianna. Brianna had torn their relationship apart.
None of the rumors were true. Strangely, there were bigger headlines in the school tabloids. People were far more interested in Natalie's singing ticket. It was one of those odd little stories that people exchanged while waiting at the bus stop or standing in line at the cafeteria. No one had ever heard of anyone getting a ticket for singing.

In spite of the breakup, everyone wanted to know about her getting pulled over, and specifically what song she'd been singing. She'd since learned that it was called “Big
Girls Don't Cry,” which was just completely ironic. Every time she heard Matt's name, she felt like bursting into tears.

Jeremy was still popular and sought after by practically every girl on campus.

Natalie, Jeremy, and Brianna were still friends. The three of them still walked to lunch every day together, and it was actually kind of funny to see the expressions some of their classmates wore when they noticed them laughing and acting as though nothing had ever happened.

Brianna had been worried about going to the dance with Jeremy and had even asked Natalie if it was okay before she accepted his invitation. Natalie had given her full support.

It felt good to be free, but at the same time Natalie felt like things weren't completely resolved. Matt had never replied to her text, and she wasn't even sure if he'd shown up for school again today. He'd been MIA all week. Jo and Vincent had reminded her that he was sick. Rumors were flying that he had mono, which only added to Natalie's stress. What if she had mono?

Today, instead of walking to lunch with Jeremy and Brianna, Natalie took a differ
ent route. It was Thursday, which meant that the paper hit stands today. She quickly headed to the nearest stack of newspapers she could find. She gasped with delight when she noticed Matt's ghost story featured on the cover. The newspaper's artist had even sketched a cool, ghostly looking cowboy next to the story.

Mr. Moore must've really liked Matt's story too, because he was the one who decided what made the cover of the newspaper. She read Matt's story for the second time and felt as though it were her own story that had made the cover. She was truly excited for him. She didn't care if all her classmates wondered why she was grinning ear to ear over a ghost story.

After she finished reading the story, she took a moment to look over the paper. She stood next to the newspaper stack while her classmates bustled in next to her, reaching for their copies of the
Coyote Chronicle
.

She became lost inside the pages, oblivious to the world around her as she looked at all the hard work she'd contributed to this particular issue. Seeing her name in a byline felt so rewarding, but in some ways she also felt sad. She'd worked closely with Matt on this issue
of the paper, and thinking of their Denny's meetings made her heart ache a little.

Her quiz was featured on the second page of the paper, and the column in its usual place—the last page. She glanced up. Many of her classmates had stopped in their lunch tracks to browse the paper as well. She noticed that a lot of them had already turned to the last page. That silly little column was more popular than anything—even sports. It just went to show how powerful love could be.

Instead of heading to the cafeteria, she headed to the newsroom, holding the paper. She wanted to congratulate Matt on the cover story, and it was about time they resolved a few things—even if it meant the resolution wasn't in her favor. She wasn't looking for a deep conversation or some major breakthrough between them. She just wanted things to be cool. She also had something that she wanted to give him.

She found him sitting in front of the same computer that he always used. He looked up when he noticed her, and she felt her palms turn sweaty. Her copy of the newspaper felt sticky against her hands.

“Hey,” she said, “I just wanted to con
gratulate you. The cover story? That's awesome.”

“Thanks,” he said. His cheeks turned a little pink as he shrugged. “It's not that big of a deal.” His voice wasn't raspy, but he released a little cough.

“Yes, it is!”

“Thanks. I've been meaning to call you.”

“Really.” She took a step forward. “I hope you're feeling better.”

“I am. But it was pretty brutal for a few days there.” He cleared his throat. “But listen…I just hope…everything is cool.”

“Of course it is. Um…” This was so awkward. “You know I told Jeremy what happened. I hope you're not mad.”

“I know. I told him too—that same day, actually. I'm not mad at all…I just, I mean, he's my…”

“He's your best friend. I know. It's okay.” She saved him from telling her what he was really thinking—there was no way he could be with her because his best friend still came first. It was admirable. But it still killed her inside. She sensed sadness in his eyes too. It was so unfair.

There wasn't much more to say, so she
wasted no time and reached into her backpack and pulled out the disk. “Here, it's my latest column. We can use it for November.”

He seemed puzzled. “I didn't know that we had decided on—”

“It's from the question you gave me before—the one I didn't answer. I decided to go ahead and write the column anyway. It's my advice.”

The corners of his lips turned up, and he seemed a little surprised. He took the disk from her hands. “Thanks, Nat. I look forward to reading it.”

“All right, well…I'm going to go grab a bite,” she said.

“I'll be there in a minute.”

She left the newsroom, feeling a combination of relief and sadness. She was relieved their friendship wasn't ruined, but deep in her heart she wanted so much more than his friendship. She sensed he wanted the same.

Wearing her bathrobe, she sat in front of her computer looking at the column she'd given to Matt. She knew he'd read it by now, and she couldn't help but wonder what he thought. She'd read the column so many times she practically knew it by heart. She closed out her screen. She could hear Prints William going ballistic downstairs, and knew her friends had probably arrived.

It was time to slip into her costume. As she pulled the gown over her head, she wondered if Matt was going to the dance. She hadn't spoken to him since she'd given him the column. Jo and Vincent hadn't heard anything.

It wasn't dark yet, and her parents were helping her brothers get ready. They were all going trick-or-treating, and Grandma Jones would pass out candy. Grandma Jones
was watching
Nancy Grace
downstairs. The television was so loud she was afraid that the neighbors would call the police. Grandma Jones would never hear the doorbell ring. Natalie made a mental note to ask for a television for Christmas. Maybe she could have her own small TV in her room, just to escape the freakish shows that Grandma Jones watched.

“Natalie,” her mother called. “Jo and Vincent are here.”

Natalie found her family and friends downstairs. Brandon had already painted his face white and slicked his hair back. Black circles surrounded his eyes and fake blood dripped down his chin. He was going as a vampire.
Dressed to kill,
Natalie thought. Thomas's astronaut costume didn't require makeup.
Dressed for success.

Natalie immediately showered her friends with compliments. With his drama background, Vincent had been able to use theater makeup for their dead bride and groom costumes, and they looked awesome. They looked like they were straight off the set of a horror movie. The costumes were by far the best Jo and Vincent had ever worn. There was something else going on with
them too. Something in their eyes. Natalie couldn't figure out what it was, but they seemed giddy and confident.

“You look hot too,” Vincent said.

“You're the perfect Cleopatra,” Jo added.

Natalie had decided to finally go as Cleopatra this year. She could do whatever she wanted now that she was single. Brianna had helped her find the costume. Natalie had to admit, she looked pretty good as Cleopatra. She had her black bob and her waiflike figure with her skinny neck. She wore a full-length Egyptian white-and-gold dress and headpiece. Her eye makeup was dark and sultry. She'd even drawn the signature black Cleopatra eyeliner wings off her eyelids. The funny thing was, she couldn't get over the coincidence—how Cleopatra had come between two friends, Julius Caesar and Mark Antony. The only difference between Natalie's and Cleopatra's love lives was that Natalie's two guys were still friends and Natalie was heading to the dance solo. Natalie doubted that Cleopatra ever attended any dances solo.

Natalie's family had taken the news of the breakup well. She'd imagined they'd throw her out in the streets and ask if they
could adopt Jeremy in her place. However, her brothers seemed as though they'd already forgotten him, and both her parents had explained they'd broken up with people at her age also.

The plan for the evening was for the three friends to meet with some of Vincent's drama buddies at Friday's for dinner, and then they were heading to the dance. Vincent drove.

There were a few other groups from school at the restaurant, and it was fun seeing all the costumes. Thankfully, there were a few other singletons in their dinner group. She dined with Danica Patrick and Barack Obama. There were two couples from the fifties and sixties. One couple had even come in the fork and spoon getup. Natalie was just glad that she didn't have to wear it.

Their waitress was dressed as Medusa and had two dozen rubber snakes tied to little braids on her head and blood dripping from a fake cut on her neck. She looked pretty cool.

Natalie was partway through her burger when she glanced across the table and noticed that Vincent's arm was slung over Jo's shoulders as if it belonged there. Jo was snuggled into his chest as if she'd resided in
that special place forever. They looked like a couple. Had Jo taken her advice? Was she giving him a chance? They looked great together—even dead.

Natalie was so excited for her friends that she could hardly pay attention to her meal after that. It was en route to the car when Jo squeezed Natalie's arm. Vincent had run back inside to use the bathroom.

“I kissed him,” Jo whispered.

Natalie's jaw dropped. “Are you serious?”

Jo nodded. “Shhh.”

“Oh my gosh, I'm so excited for you guys. You guys are so cute together.”

Jo seemed genuinely happy.

The vibe in the car was different on the way to the dance. Natalie felt like she was riding to the dance with a couple and not just a couple of friends. As she sat in the backseat she felt excited for her friends. But she also felt kind of sad. She thought of Matt and wondered what he was doing. Was he thinking of her, too? Or was he totally over it? It just didn't seem right for them to be apart.

Kevin Rudolf's “Let It Rock” had just started when they entered the gym. The dance floor was packed and the lighting was
dim. The Howl at the Moon decor was the best Natalie had ever seen. Jo had won her battle with the decorations and a gigantic yellow moon with a dark blue background hung in the front of the gym. A witch complete with broomstick dangled in front of the moon. Black lights alternated with dim lights, and her classmates' teeth and eyes flashed and glowed. In spite of the party mood, Natalie still felt sad. She couldn't stop thinking about Matt. But what more could she do? She'd given him the column. He had to know how she felt.

Jeremy and Brianna greeted her with hugs. They were dressed as a doctor and a nurse. Jeremy was the nurse. He'd crossed genders and his costume was hilarious. He wore lipstick and a wig, and had stuffed his little nurse dress with fake boobs. Laughing with him felt good.

Jeremy probably knew where Matt was, but she wasn't about to ask him. That would just be too weird.

“You look great, Nat,” Jeremy said. “And Jo and Vincent?” He pointed to them. They were holding hands. “What's up with that?” He grinned.

Natalie nodded. “It's about time, right?”

“I'd say so.”

She danced a few songs with her friends before deciding she needed some fresh air. She felt disappointed, and her headpiece was starting to give her a headache. Part of her knew Matt wouldn't show up. But she'd been hoping he would. She'd never imagined that his absence would make her so sad. She was heading for the double doors of the gym when a figure appeared in the doorway.

Her heart skipped a beat. She had to move closer just to make sure it was actually him. “Matt?” She hoped she sounded calm and normal. Her heart was pounding so hard she thought it was going to pop right out of her chest.

“Hey, Nat.”

Shock rippled through her veins. She gave him a once-over. He had the Caesar hair, but his attire was more Mark Antony. “You're…Julius Caeser? Or Mark Antony?”

He shrugged and smiled. “I'm not sure. I just drove around town for three hours looking for one of these, and this was the only one I could find. It wasn't in the package. I just wanted to match you, Nat.”

“How did you know?”

“Jo told me.”

She laughed and threw her arms around his neck.

“I can't stop thinking about you,” he whispered.

“Me too.”

They looked at each other beneath the glow of the moon, and in one heartbeat they both leaned in. His kiss felt so warm again, and this time, as she fell into his arms, she knew she didn't have to pull away.