Love Realized (6 page)

Logan actually spoke up and said, “Thanks for doing that, Jake. I appreciate it. I got the grill covered.” He then made his way past Jake and patted him on the shoulder as he did. Logan looked like a beaten dog. His eyes were sad and contrite, and his face belied that whatever had happened, he knew he had some serious ass kissing to do as he made his way toward his wife, who had her back to them and was staring intently out the window at something.

Jake turned back to his brother as he was making his exit. “Not sure what the fuck is going on here, man, but I'm going to assume you will make sure Gillian is okay?” he said in deliberately low tones so that neither Gillian nor Logan could hear him.

“I got it, man. Just get the meat; Gillian doesn’t want anyone else to know something is wrong. So the sooner you get back, the sooner the party can continue.” Jake heard the anger and irritation in Jason’s voice.
What the hell did Logan do?
he thought to himself as he left the kitchen and made his way out the front door.

Jake made it out to the driveway and was about to get into his jeep when he noticed someone sitting on the ground on the other side, leaning against the wheel. He made his way around the front of the jeep and found Jonathan sitting there with his knees bent, elbows resting on top of them with his hands firmly cradling his forehead.

“Hey, Jonathan, you okay?”

Jonathan looked up, startled for a moment, before recovering. “Um … yeah, Uncle Jake, I'm fine,” he declared with a tone that clearly expressed he was suppressing some kind of emotion.
Like mother, like son
. Not believing the kid, Jake asked, “Headache or something? You want me to get your mom for you?” He motioned over his shoulder in the direction of the house.

“No!” Jonathan declared, almost too quickly. “Really, Uncle Jake, I'm good … I promise.”

Jake was still not convinced, but knew it was stupid to push the topic. Seventeen year old boys didn’t respond too well to that, if Jake remembered anything about his teenage years. As he made his way back toward the driver’s side of his jeep, Jake responded. “Well, okay. I'm heading to get some meat for the grill since your mom accidentally dropped it all. You wanna go for the ride?”

“No … thanks. I'm going back inside. Nick and Robby are here. I just came out here to make a call,” he said as he raised his hand and gestured to his cell phone. Then he slowly unfolded his long body to stand up. As Jake watched him get up, he couldn’t help but notice how tall the young man had gotten.

“Okay, man, but if you need anything, just let me know.” Jake wasn’t sure why he said that to Jonathan. He was sure the kid knew that, but something about the look in his eyes made him feel like it was necessary. Maybe it was girl troubles. Jake remembered what it was like at that age when you didn’t get the girl you thought you were destined to be with. Ironically enough, Gillian was that girl.

So, yes, he remembered what that was like and hoped that poor Jonathan wasn’t going through that, too. Jonathan nodded at Jake’s statement and made his way into the house as Jake climbed in the jeep. It didn’t take him long to get the meat from his house back over to the party, and then he made his way over to the grocery store. He felt an urgent need to get back to the party; maybe he should bring some chocolate or maybe some ice cream back for Gillian. Better yet, he’d bring some chocolate ice cream. Kill two birds with one stone—the chocolate and the ice cream together—two comfort foods at the same time. Seeing a container of Rocky Road ice cream, and knowing it was her favorite, he picked it up and put it in the basket. Hopefully this could put a small smile on her face.

Gillian couldn’t tell if everyone was just hanging out longer at the party for no apparent reason, or if this was the norm, and she was just so ready for this day to be over that it seemed to be dragging on. This thought made her feel bad, of course, because this was for her son, and he deserved to have all this attention. It was his birthday after all. That made her realize that she still needed to do the cake. No wonder everyone was still here. She really needed to pull her head out of her ass.

She had managed to keep her distance from the whore.
Or was slut a better title? Hmmm, how about Slutty McWhore?
That made her giggle a little, even though she was disappointed she couldn’t share the name with anyone else. Well, in any case, she noticed that the woman was also keeping to herself and staying close to her husband, who seemed to be enjoying her attentions. It was almost as if it wasn’t the norm for the two of them.

This made Gillian wonder if her clinging to her husband was unusual or if maybe
Slutty McWhore
was doing it to get Logan’s attention.
That bitch! Whoa … hold on there, girl! You really need to get a hold of yourself.
She was going to lose her mind with all this inner bickering. Funny part about the inner bickering was that it was keeping her distracted from what was going to happen after everyone left. Yes, she really didn’t want to entertain people, but she really didn’t want to have the conversation that she was going to have to have when the final person left. Maybe she could just sneak out the back while Logan was distracted.
No it’s not running away, it’s called distancing myself to gain some perspective on the situation
. Yeah, that’s a strong argument.

The truth of the matter was that whenever she looked up, Logan was looking at her. She was sure he knew what she was thinking, but she managed to avoid him most of the afternoon. It was a dance—he moved, she moved. Her escape plan was going to require an accomplice … but who? Then, almost as if the gods had answered her prayers, in walked her savior.

“Okay, bitches! The party can start now that I'm here!”
Allie was here? Oh thank God, Allie is here!
Gillian sighed in relief and felt her body sag a bit when she saw Allie walk through the door. She was so excited to see her that she didn’t know what to do. So she stood there quietly and watched as her best friend walked into the throes of family to greet her. Allie was Logan’s sister, and Gillian’s best friend, even though she didn’t live in San Diego anymore. This, of course, was something they all hoped would change sometime soon, but she knew that Allie had her reasons for moving away; she didn’t have to agree with them, she just had to support her.

This rationale was exactly why Allie was going to be the perfect accomplice to help her escape for the evening. She just needed some space and time to break down. She needed to cry and be away from Logan to develop a plan. She could just tell Allie what she needed, and like Jake, she wouldn’t ask questions now but would expect some answers later. Later she could handle, just not in front of everyone else.

Gillian was so grateful to see Allie, especially since they weren’t expecting her to make it down here this weekend. She watched as Allie stopped to greet her parents, stooped down to kiss Morgan on her pregnant belly and told her not to get up. She hugged Logan, Sean and Jason, too. Then Gillian’s breath hitched when Allie stopped and introduced herself to Adam and HER. She felt like growling when they shook hands.
That is my best friend, not yours! You can’t have her! Okay, calm the fuck down.

Allie then continued her journey toward Gillian and greeted her with a smile. “Hey you!” she said to Gillian. But before she could respond, something in her face must have tipped Allie off because she immediately when on alert. “What’s wrong, Gilly?”

Gillian just shook her head and smiled back at her best friend as tears started to fill her eyes. “I'm so glad you’re here, Al. I really need you; I just didn’t realize how badly until I saw you … thanks for being here.” And with that, Allie stepped closer and threw her arms around Gillian. She hugged her … hard. As she pulled back, she looked to Allie and knew she would help her. “Allie, some stuff is going on, and I really don’t want to stay here tonight. Problem is, I’m sure that Logan will do what he can to prevent me from leaving. Can you help me get out of here without causing a scene? Or telling your brother?”

“Gilly, he may be my brother, but you know you’re my girl. Hoes before bros and all.” She said it with a slightly gansta-like slang and winked at her. “Tell me what you need.”

“All I know is that I need to get out of here. Maybe after the cake and presents are done, can you get your brother to pay attention to something other than me? Jason knows what’s going on, and I'm sure he can help.”

Allie nodded and looked toward where Jason stood near Logan. “Hmm, Gigantor knows the four-one-one? Must be juicy if he’s the one who knows and not Jake … Interesting.” Allie, of course, said this while raising one eyebrow in question and cupping her own chin and tapping it, like she was deep in thought. Gillian just rolled her eyes at the theatrical and jokester ways of her best friend. “You know I’ll tell you everything, but it’s just not something to do here and now,” she said, silently pleading for her friend to not dig yet. “In fact, the only people who have any idea that something is going on other than Logan and me are Jason and Jake. But Jason knows it all.”

Allie stared at Gillian, and her eyes softened. “Girl, he fucked up bad this time, didn’t he?” All she could do was nod once as she fought to keep her emotions in check. The constant battle of anger, shame, humiliation, and shock were beginning to take their toll. Allie leaned in and hugged her again. “Have no fear, SuperBitch is here, and I got your back. Just tell me, though, is this a
Oh-no-he-didn’t-moment
?
Or is it a
Bitch-hold-my-hoops-and-get-me-the-Vaseline-moment
?
”

Once again shaking her head, Gillian laughed at her friend’s finger snapping and head-rolling while she said that. “Maybe both,” she replied.

Allie understood that and said, “Go get the cake ready so we can get this show on the road.” She nodded and headed toward the house, feeling slightly relieved that she was going to be able to avoid the confrontation with Logan tonight. She really didn’t care if it made her a coward or not, she deserved some time and space.

Gillian made her way into the house to get what she needed for the cake and ice cream. Once inside, she overheard Jonathan telling his friends, “Go ahead guys, I’ll meet you there.” He turned to her as his friends were leaving. “Hey boys, heading out before the cake?”

“Sorry Mrs. B, we were gonna meet some friends at the movies,” they said as they waved and headed out toward the front of the house. Gillian turned to Jonathan. “You heading out, too?”

He stood there and stared at her for a few moments, and then he leaned in and hugged her. “I love you, Mom,” he said to her as he kissed her on the cheek and pulled away. “I love you too, kiddo. Are you okay?” He nodded a yes and gave her a weak smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Is it okay if I go to the movies and then stay over at Nick’s?”

“Of course, but you need to make sure you say goodbye to your brother. He will be upset if you don’t.”

“Okay, Mom,” he said as he hugged her one more time. As he let go and went to head out to say bye to Dylan, Gillian grabbed his arm and made him turn back toward her. “Baby, did something happen? Is there a girl causing you heartache or something.”

“I guess you could say that, Mom,” he said with another weak smile.

“Well, if you need to talk, you have plenty of people to choose from.” Motioning to the backyard that was full of plenty adults that would offer any support Jonathan needed, she added, “Don’t forget that.”

“I won’t.” And then he turned and walked out the back door. She watched him out the kitchen window as he told his little brother goodbye. They did that half-handshake one-arm hug thing that all guys do. That made her smile. Then she watched as Jonathan made his way out the side gate without acknowledging Logan’s call to him. Her poor boy was hurting over something. The desire to smack some teenage girl for doing that to her son gave her a temporary reprieve from her current issues. She made a mental note to mention this to Logan so he could try and talk to him, too.

Well, time to get this show on the road.
Armed with her camera and a well-lit cake, she announced to the yard, “Time to sing to the birthday boy!” She could see Dylan’s face light up as soon as he saw the cake shaped like a Lego Guy.
Yep! Perfect choice of cake
! Gillian gave herself yet another mental pat on the back for that. Apparently she was starving for some kind of appreciation since she repeatedly had to mentally pat herself on the back today.
Jeez
!

Walking over to Dylan, Gillian saw Logan head her way. He gently eased the camera from her shoulder and got into position to take the best shots of him. They always worked together as a team. No communication was needed for them—they just knew. This thought brought her pain up to the forefront again, and the tightness in her chest intensified. They were so great together, why would he need anyone else? Well, at least she thought they were great together. Fortunately, the sight of her son’s smiling face, as she lowered herself in front of him with his cake, helped edge the pain back under control. They sang, Dylan made his wish and then blew out the candles.

“Mom! This cake is awesome!” Well her day just got a little better with that bit of appreciation. He jumped up from where he was sitting and moved around the cake toward her, throwing his arms around her neck. She fumbled to set the cake down so not to drop it. Someone took it from her, and she was able to wrap her arms around her youngest son. It gave her strength. Her kids always had that effect on her. She could battle any monster or demon as long as she had her kids.