Love Renewed (Entwined Hearts #3) (16 page)

Dane:
Just coming back to the hotel, we went for lunch. How are you feeling now?

Me:
I was feeling much better. Now though, with this film, I’m wondering if I should go back to bed as I’m suddenly feeling sick.

Dane:
Ha. Don’t think that will fly with Soph. Try to think about something else.

Me:
Like what?

Dane:
Don’t know. When I need to think about something good I imagine your mouth wrapped around my dick while you kneel in front of me.

Me:
That can be arranged.

Dane:
Oh, it will be.

I feel my pussy pulse at his words and bite my bottom lip to stop the groan that wants to erupt.

“Are you going to be on your phone for the next two hours?” Soph asks.

“I’m getting off, so you can torture me with this shit,” I moan.

“She’s a dancing welder, who’s hot. And it has a kick arse soundtrack,” Pea mutters without moving her eyes from the screen.

“Whatever,” I mutter and roll my eyes.

Me:
Right, I have to go. I’ve been told to get off the phone. Sex talk later.

Dane:
Fuck talking baby. You’ll be lucky if you can breathe later.

I close my eyes and put my phone to one side before something really inappropriate happens on my friend’s wedding day while I sit on the sofa with them watching
Flashdance
. I still love these ladies. Even if they do make me watch shit.

“Okay, I’ll be back in a couple of hours,” Con says walking toward his suite. Having left Pea with Eleanor when he came to have lunch with Saul and me. Eric and Rich took over from her when she needed to collect the wedding flowers. Now it’s Cons turn to go back and spend some time with his daughter while her uncles go for a swim.

I follow Saul into his suite. “Beer?” he asks walking to the mini fridge.

“Yeah,” I answer and move through the living area, stopping at the wall of windows that look out over the Las Vegas late afternoon bustle.

I hear Saul stop beside me, he hands my beer over and then questions, “Dane?” He knows something’s on my mind. What he doesn’t realise is that there are a fuck of a lot of things on my mind. Some of those things I need to talk to him about, but part of that is not for today. It’s not for prior to his wedding day, one of the happiest days of his life. Some of this shit is best kept for now. No. What I need to tell him today is different. It’s something I want him to know before he goes to get married. Soph laid some heavy emotions on me earlier, and now it’s time to lay the same on my little brother.

I turn my body slightly so I’m facing him. I take a moment to stare into his bright blue eyes. Usually, I close myself off. I always have. Learnt it from a young age. In the business I function daily within, the grime I associate with, I need to cut my emotions off. I never let people see. Never.

My family has been getting glimpses of me lately. It’s been harder to hold them back. Nova is my exception and always has been. I’ve never been able to hide myself from her, even when I’ve tried it’s always been impossible, she breaks down every barrier I build. She managed to creep inside me when we were kids and I was never able to expel her. I think that’s why it’s only ever been her…it would only ever be her. There’s nobody else that I could ever open myself up to so easily, without stipulations. I’ve never really stopped loving her. Never allowed my heart to heal. Now I want my family to see me how she sees does, how Soph said she sees me sometimes. I want to be that man for them. I want to be that man for Nova. I want to be that man for me. Finally.

“I love you, Saul,” I say the words that I need him to know and watch as he goes solid, everything except his throat, with which moves as he swallows, trying to control himself. I can see his eyes glaze with moisture. But I won’t mention it. Fuck my eyes are slightly glassy too. When he seems to have gathered himself he steps forward, his movements stiff and awkward. Throwing his arm around my shoulder he pulls me into him, wrapping his other arm around my back. He relaxes and clings on for a second. Like this is something he’s needed for a while. A big brother to help him, because let’s be honest, our mother is a useless bitch. As he releases me I grip his shoulder with one of my hands, my other one slides around the back of his head. He leans back into my hand and I look at him, letting him know non-verbally that I will always have his back.
Always.

“Love you too, brother,” he whispers and I nod.

These are the people I would do anything for. These are the people I would give my life for. This is the family I’ve dreamed of my whole life.

“You’ve got this,” I tell Saul, placing my arm on his shoulder, trying to calm his twitchiness. We arrived at the wedding venue a little over thirty minutes ago so Saul could deal with any last minute issues. Thankfully there were none. It’s a little chapel on the strip, and actually pretty perfect for Saul and Soph, as much as I thought it might be tacky. The
Chapel of the Flowers
is actually quaint and because they’re getting married in the garden, you wouldn’t even know that you’re in Vegas if you didn’t want to. I fully expect Soph to have a photo taken under the Vegas sign, though. She’ll want some
tacky
captured for the day.

“I know, I'm good, I just need my woman here with me where she belongs,” Saul tells me with a wink that he uses to hide his nervousness, but I can see it in every little movement he makes. Like right now, as he pulls the collar of his crisp black shirt for the hundredth time. Or when he straightens his waistcoat, again.

We’re dressed the same, Saul, Con and me. Tux’s. Entirely in black. With a single white rose in the lapel. It’s just the three of us standing beside the outside alter. Eric and Rich are at the front of the seating arrangement. Five rows of chairs are split in the middle to make an aisle. The seating isn’t needed as Eric and Rich are the only people invited, everyone else is in the wedding party. Rich has Eleanor on his lap as Eric fusses over her. I look back to Saul, who is now tapping his foot.

“Breathe brother,” I whisper to him. His eyes dart to me and he nods, rubbing his palm over his heart.

“I just want it perfect, like Soph, she deserves this,” he tells me something I already know.

“She’ll be here soon, then you’ll make her your wife. You’ve waited all these years, just a few more minutes okay? A few minutes.” I hope my words are of some comfort, but I need to get back to the front of the chapel to wait for the women. “Got to get out there,” I say gesturing to the road. “Will you be okay?” I question. He nods and that’s enough for me to move.

Five minutes later a black limo pulls up. I open the door and Soph exits the car. I take her in. I know there’s movement as Nova and Pea get out, but I can’t pull my eyes away from Soph. She’s smiling. Huge. Her hair is up with little bits hanging out of it. I have no idea what kind of dress she’s wearing. It probably has some fancy as fuck name. All I know is that it fits her like a second skin. It’s white and looks as though the whole thing is made of lace. It has no sleeves and thin little straps.

“Dane, before you say anything look at the back,” Soph says and carefully turns herself around.

Shit. Saul will either love or hate the back.

That’s the first thing that comes to mind when I see it. Soph’s back is on show, all the way down to the top of her arse. The dress has a little bit trailing at the back.

I think it’s called a train, but I know fuck all about this shit.

“Soph, you look beautiful,” I tell her. She does. She has never looked as beautiful and weirdly innocent as she does right now. I wonder if this is why women are supposed to wear white. To make it seem like they’re not little minxes. I know different. Soph needs to be a minx to put up with my brother. I chuckle out loud at my thoughts.

“What’s so funny big guy?” Nova whispers from behind me. I turn to face her and stop. I feel like all the blood in my veins has rushed to my dick. If Soph’s dress fitted her like a second skin, then Nova’s looks like it’s been painted on. Black, short, tight, and she also has her back on show.

“Fuck me, baby,” I say under my breath. She smiles back at me but says nothing. “No, seriously, I want to fuck you. Right now,” I tell her.

“Sorry, now’s not a good time,” Nova replies with a smirk, she’s more than aware of how she affects me.

I growl and adjust my junk, something I haven’t had to do in public for years.

“Fuck,” I murmur again pinching the bridge of my nose. “Soph, let’s get this show on the road…like now,” I demand, marching her to the Chapel. The quicker I get my little brother married, the faster I can sink into Nova while she’s wearing that fucking dress.

Gathering at the entrance, I watch as Pea walks down the aisle followed by Nova, my eyes momentarily flit from Nova’s arse to Con’s face. I click my neck and clamp down the chuckle that I feel as I watch his reaction to Pea’s dress. Shit, he looks like he swallowed his tongue. I stop staring at him and unfortunately at Nova’s fucking behind when Soph pulls my attention.

“Thank you.” She gazes up at me with tears pooling in the corners of her eyes.

“Hey, why are you crying? I mean I know Saul can be a dick, but he’s not that bad.” I try to lighten the moment and Soph smiles through her tears.

“Yeah, I adore him. I’m so happy. I feel like we wouldn’t be here right now without your help.”

“Bullshit, you two would have always ended up together,” I state.

Soph nods, she knows what I’m saying is the truth. “Yeah, I know, but you helped it happen quicker, so we didn’t waste years pretending. Also…listen, Saul doesn’t talk to me much about this stuff…I mean I don’t think you tell him much.” She stops and I feel my gut clench at whatever is about to come out of her mouth. “Thank you for taking care of Patrick…in whatever way you did. I don’t care…” My head throbs. How much does she know, or worse, what the fuck does she think I’ve done? I want to walk away. Give up now, but Soph grabs my hand. “I don’t know what or how he’s gone, I just know he is. Saul told me he’s gone and that you made that happen. The day he told me, was the first that I slept without being scared. It was the first time I went outside of the house without fear of someone hurting me or worse, hurting someone I love. You gave me my freedom back.” The tears spill out of her eyes and I know right then that she really doesn’t care what I did, and more than that, I wish I could bring Patrick back from the dead so I could do it all again, but really slowly this time.

I shake off the sudden aggravation that has my body cramping up and pull Soph into me. Holding her I whisper, “You don’t need to know what happened, just know you’re safe. I take care of my family and always will Tink. Now you need to rein it in, ‘cause my little brother is waiting for you out there, and if he gets impatient and comes back here to see what’s going on…well, he’ll see your tears, and I don’t want Saul punching me today.” I grin at Soph and she grins back.

“Okay, Dane.”

The music changes to the wedding march and I escort Soph to my brother. I’ve never felt so proud in my life as I do right now. Knowing that I’m part of this family. That the love they feel for me is unconditional, that’s something I’ve never known. I’m still not always sure what to do with these feelings, but with Nova by my side, the life I want has become real, and for once it’s within reach. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I do know that I’m going to do everything in my power to have these people always look at me like I mean something. Like I belong.

Throughout the ceremony, my eyes are glued to Nova, partly because I can’t take my eyes off her. She’s beautiful—like an angel, like
my
angel. I also can’t pull my thoughts away from the idea that this could be us one day. The only time I move back to the bride and groom is at the vows. They both wrote their own and I admire them for putting their feelings into words.

Soph speaks first. “Saul. I loved you when we were five, and you painted over my favourite picture. I loved you when we were eight, and you pulled my hair. A lot. I loved you when we were nine, and you told me it was going to be okay as I cried after my dad died. I loved you when we were twelve, and you hit Richard Colt for pushing me into the mud at Squire Park. I loved you when we were fifteen, and you took me to TGI Friday because it was my birthday and everyone else had forgotten. I loved you when we were twenty, and you bought me the charm bracelet, the one I saw in the vintage shop window, a shop that we had walked by just once, a month before.” She stops and holds up her wrist. Showing the charm bracelet wrapped around it, and smiles at him as happy tears roll down her cheeks. “I have loved you my whole life. I will love you for the rest of my life. You give me something I never had before. Just by loving me Saul. You give me happiness.” She stops and Saul leans forward taking her lips with his. I don’t blame him. Glancing back at Nova she’s staring at me. I feel a pang in my chest. No matter how happy I feel, I keep getting this little reminder that she can’t remember us. It's soul destroying.

“Soph. When I started writing my vows, I found it difficult to articulate what I feel. How do you put into words that you’re so happy you think you might burst at any minute? How do you explain that what you feel inside is all consuming, and if I were to die tomorrow, then I know my life was a full and happy life just because you were a part of it? I tried to write about how you’re the reason I get to be who I’ve always wanted to be. You’re the person who allows me to be me because without you I was just walking a path, without you I was alone and you were always the one guiding me. Did I ever tell you that when I had the car accident you were the last person I thought about, the last face I saw before I blacked out? You are my all. The reason I want to keep breathing and more than that, you
are
my exception. Without you I wouldn’t be me because no one else could ever be you.”

Saul’s words resonate with me. It’s like he’s in my brain speaking to Nova for me.

One day. One day Nova and I will be whole again.

The wedding, even though it’s not quick enough for me, is the shit. Soph got everything she wanted, and Saul got Soph. So everyone’s happy. I tried hard to pull my eyes from Nova’s arse. Without success. I had a few moments where I wondered what it would be like to have Nova as my wife. It’s something I want. In my future. Something that I
will
make happen. But for right now I have another itch that needs scratching. We all climb in the limo and make our way to the Stratosphere. The reception is being held in a private dining room at the top of the magnificent building. Saul had to pay for twenty people as that was the minimum, but he didn’t care. Soph had her heart set on it and that was enough for him. They were lucky in a lot of ways. Things played into their hands for this wedding. It usually takes years to get the wedding you want, they managed to pull it off in a couple of months. Amazing.

We arrive and everyone gets out. I wait, allowing everyone to exit, then lean forward just as Soph turns back to the car.

“Dane?” The question pops out of her mouth as Saul catches my eyes with a smirk. I wink and shut the door.

“Drive wherever. Keep the back private and I’ll make it worth your while,” I tell the driver who nods and the partition slowly raises back until it’s in position and the back is once again private.