Love Simmers (3 page)

“
Sounds like
most kitchens I’ve worked in honestly,” Quinn said.

I knew from the look that
passed between Nate and Ollie they weren’t impressed.

If I learnt anything over the
course of the next hour it was that those two were difficult to
impress. Potential staff entered and then left, still unemployed.
If they weren’t careful there’d be no one left in town to hire.
Chester was a small place.

I left sometime during the
second hour to give a phone interview with a national food
magazine. Even though I was on holiday, the constant requirement
that I self-promote remained. Apparently, if I didn't tweet or
appear in magazines weekly people would forget my name according to
my agent. It was exhausting. There were only so many variations of
‘watch my show tonight’ I could come up with to tweet and I refused
to even step into the world of selfies and belfies and whatever
ilfies would be the next trend.

“
What’s next on
the agenda for Logan Blake?” The journalist asked as I lounged on
the couch in my brother’s living room. I’d put on my yoga pants and
poured a glass of wine already. It was the only way to get through
another interviewer asking the exact same questions as the
last.

“
Well, I’ve got
another cook book out in three months and the show’s new season
airs in the fall.” I marked two things off the checklist in front
of me that my publicist had sent. All the things I needed to bring
up in this interview had been neatly compiled for me as if I
couldn’t remember them on my own. I scrunched the piece of paper up
into a small ball.

“
I hear you’re
opening a restaurant as well according to a source in your
hometown,” she pried and I almost groaned in irritation. Nate and
Ollie had given me an epic lecture about how I was not under any
circumstances to mention their restaurant in connection with my
brand.

“
My brother and
a friend are opening a business. My involvement in the place is
limited to proud sister,” I replied honestly.

The journalist asked a few more
trivial questions before the call ended and I rested my head on the
couch in relief. When I started out as a TV chef I had loved every
second in the spotlight. Now, a little older and a lot wiser, the
novelty was wearing off. Between the constant scrutiny and the
stress of needing to regularly get my name in the magazines it was
no longer about the food but rather the branding. I’d been in the
business three years and I was feeling burnt out. I was starting to
worry about the rest of my life. I wanted to keep cooking, I wasn’t
sure if I wanted to keep doing it in the spotlight though. It would
be nice for it to be about the food again, like it was for
Ollie.

After a few more sips of wine I
burrowed into the old leather couch and drifted off into the
peaceful void of a deep sleep.

“
Sleeping
beauty, you hungry?” Nate gently woke me with a flick on the nose.
I tried to bite his finger when he attempted to flick me again. He
pulled away with a brief smile. After my overdue apology, he’d been
slowly thawing towards me. It was nice.

“
What time is
it?” I asked with a yawn as I rolled off the couch and over to the
table Nate had set for two.

“
Six. Ollie’s
still at the restaurant working on the menu.” Nate pulled a chair
back for me before settling himself across the table from me. “We
ended up hiring four people.”

“
When I left I
thought it would just be the two of you come opening night,” I
said, looking down at the meal in front of me.

I took a moment to admire the
beautifully presented plate of steak and hand-made fries, the smell
alone enough to make my mouth water.

“
What’s the
occasion?” I asked as I dug into the meal before me. The only thing
I loved more than a free meal was a really good home cooked dinner
and Nate knew how to cook, probably better than me.

“
There isn’t
one. I came home. You were curled into a little ball asleep on the
couch. I thought I’d feed you,” he shrugged his
shoulders.

I dipped a piece of steak into
the red wine jus he’d made, putting the food in my mouth I started
chewing, my eyes widening in shock as it dawned on me what I was
tasting.

“
This is my
recipe!” I pointed an accusatory finger at the sauce.

I swallowed my mouthful and
marched into the kitchen. Opening the cabinets, I went around the
kitchen methodically until finally, at the back where they kept the
pots and pans, I found a copy of my book. A worn and well-loved
copy of my book. My heart almost burst with joy. Someone had read
my book!

I waltzed back into the dining
room triumphantly, laughing at the bashful look on Nate’s handsome
face.

“
You love my
book. You cherish it, admit it,” I teased him, taking another bite
of the delicious food while I watched Nate try and come up with an
answer that would deflect my allegations.

“
Love is a
strong word.” He looked down at his plate as he spoke, obviously
not wanting to see the smirk on my face.

“
Do you watch
my show as well? You and Ollie did seem to be able to quote it
extensively.” I flicked through the pages of the book, noticing the
turned down corners and cooking stains on the pages. All evidence
that he used it regularly. I turned over to the back cover, staring
in shock at the bio picture of me that was defaced with horns on
the top of my head.

“
What type of
person draws on a book?” I shouted at him, “It’s a
hardcover!”

“
I was pissed
about Tommy,” he clarified quickly, “you breaking up with
him.”

“
You didn’t
have to take it out on the book,” I whispered in pain, vowing to
never again send anymore of my cookbooks home. They weren’t
appreciated here.

“
Why did you
start dating him?” He asked and I could sense the hesitation in his
voice, as though it was a question he didn’t really want to ask.
Nate wasn’t an emotional type of man. He wasn’t good at
communicating. He was quiet, thoughtful and well…brooding. It
wasn’t that he didn’t feel. He just didn’t discuss what he felt
very often. After all, he did come from a long line of
Anglo-Saxons.

“
I was lonely
and he reminded me of home,” I replied honestly, though in my head
I also thought ‘
he reminded me of
you.’
I couldn’t say those words aloud. I
didn’t want to deal with the realisation of how much I had missed
Nate. It would only make it harder to leave again.

“
Are you not
happy in the city?” He said quietly, avoiding eye contact while he
savoured his last bite of steak.

“
I am, at
times.” I gazed at his face in the rapidly fading light of day,
admiring his five o-clock stubble and ruggedly handsome features.
If you were being technical about it you could say I was fawning.
Like a fan girl at Comic Con who’s just spotted Loki.

“
And at other
times?” He pushed.

I knew what he wanted me say
but I didn’t want to admit it aloud.

“
I miss home, a
lot.”

“
We miss you
here,” his voice was hoarse. It was both soothing and unsettling to
me. It calmed me and excited me.

“
I’m sorry
about Tommy. I should’ve checked to see if you would be okay with
it,” I conceded to my error of judgment. If I had a sister and Nate
had started dating her I would have been pissed to say the least.
It wasn’t logical or rational given the fact that Nate and I hadn’t
been together in years but it was inherently human. Seeing someone
you once cared for move on was difficult enough without another
family member being involved.

“
I’m not your
keeper.” He looked away.

“
You’re my
friend, one of my oldest friends. So, you know, bros before hoes.”
I smiled at his chuckle, his laughter making me happy. “Though I
guess in this case, since Tommy’s actually your bro, I’m the
ho.”

“
I watch your
show,” he admitted with a cringe, as though he were admitting he
enjoyed dressing up like a French maid on a routine basis. My show
was not that bad. “I like seeing you.”

“
What happened
to us? We’ve known each other our whole life.” I knew the answer to
my own question. I had happened, my own stupidity. Sometimes you
look back on the actions of your past and you literally want to die
from embarrassment. I had been so impatient, desperately wanting
fame and fortune to the point that I had placed those ambitions
above everything else. I had left my family and friends behind in
order to achieve my goals. I thought that success would make me
happy. I know now that my definition of success had been wrong
because it definitely did not mean fame and fortune. Success meant
happiness. It meant that you were content professionally and
personally. Right now, I was neither of those things.

“
You left.”
Nate was brutally honest to a fault. He’d never been anything but
honest to me. Once, when I was fourteen, I’d asked him if he liked
the dress I was wearing. He’d said he’d seen me look better in
sweats. I’d thrown away the dress and ignored him for a week. Then
I’d seen a picture of myself wearing the dress a month earlier. I’d
looked ridiculous. He’d simply told me a truth that no one else had
the balls to. I never got angry with him for being honest again.
Either you wanted an honest answer or you didn’t ask the
question.

“
People leave,”
I countered his point. It was life, people grew up and sometimes
they left home.

“
People drift
apart.” He picked up the plates from the table and walked to the
kitchen.

I didn’t say anything else.
What was there to say? He was right. We had drifted apart. And now
I just hoped it wasn’t too late to bring us back together. After
all, he was my first.

I was stocking the bar at Sails
the next day when I noticed a man standing at the window with a
camera, probably a photographer looking for a story to sell.
Unfortunately, before I could deal with it myself, Ollie and Nate
noticed as well.

“
What’s he
doing here?” Nate gave me an accusing look as he headed for the
front door. I watched the photographer’s eyes widen with alarm as
all six foot three of pissed off Nate headed his way. He bolted
before Nate even stepped outside.

“
Leave it,” I
grabbed Nate’s arm. I didn’t want the bad press that chasing down a
paparazzi would bring.

Ollie’s phone rang at that
moment, his face darkening as he listened to whatever the caller
said.

“
What? She said
what? Thanks Charlie.”

He moved quickly over to his
laptop, Nate following to see the cause of Ollie’s anger.

Ollie turned the laptop to face
me so I could read the screen. I was left breathless when I saw the
headline.

‘
BLAKE’S NEW
BUSINESS?’ it read with an exterior picture of Sails.

I groaned in despair and
counted down 3 2 1 in my head. Right on cue the shouting began.

“
We asked you
not to mention our business in any interview, Logan! I told you I
didn’t want your name associated with Sails. I didn’t want
publicity generated from your brand. You promised that nothing like
this would happen,” Ollie’s words came out so quickly that it was
hard to follow along. He talked really fast when he was
angry.

Nate stood there silent, his
disappointed expression hurting more than Ollie’s words. Nate
picked the laptop up to read the full article.

“
All I said was
that I’m a proud sister. I specifically said I had no professional
or financial interest,” I sighed, kicking myself for this mistake.
“I’m sorry. Do you want me to go home?”

I didn’t want to leave. I
wanted more than anything to see Sails opening night, to
congratulate my brother and Nate on their big night. I missed so
much of their daily lives. I didn’t want to miss this as well. But
I also didn’t want to risk bringing any negativity to an event in
Ollie’s life that was positive. I simply wouldn’t allow that to
happen.

“
The damage is
done,” Ollie said as he walked away. I watched him storm into the
kitchen, staring at the closed door to avoid facing
Nate.

“
Anything to
say?” His voice was quiet with a hard undertone. I turned around
slowly.

“
No because I
wouldn't want you to think I was sweet talking my way out of this
situation.” I picked up my handbag from the table and headed
towards the door.

Nate stopped me by wrapping a
strong arm around my waist. He turned me around to face him.

“
I’m not angry.
What you said was reasonable enough. What the media took from your
comment was unfortunate.”

I wrapped my arms around his
neck, pulling him in to a hug. I was relieved he understood my side
of the story. It would take Ollie hours to calm down enough to read
the full article and see that my words to the reporter had been
innocent enough.

I felt his body relax into the
embrace. Nate was not a hugger. He would never initiate a hug. I
remember his mother always complaining that her little boy never
wanted cuddles.

“
I’m sorry. Do
I try and clarify the comment to the media or just leave it?” I
asked him, deciding it was not the time for me to go rogue and make
the decision myself. Nate and Ollie had time, energy and money
invested into Sails. They had the ultimate say on anything relating
to the business.