Love Today (34 page)

Jared and Curtis laughed but Ben looked horrified. “God, no.”

“It’s
Taryn
. Please.”

I waited for him to agree. “Fine. Taryn.”

I really did like Jared’s bodyguards. As much as they were around him, I guess they’d have to be a good match for Jared. And they were gradually getting to know me, as well. At first they were pretty indifferent, all business. They only spoke when they needed to communicate with Jared. But after a while I asked Jared if it was okay to talk to them more, be a little
casual
. “Of course,” he replied, seeming surprised. “They’re just afraid of you.”

That had made me laugh, but he actually convinced me he was telling the truth. Apparently Jared had threatened them at the very beginning that I was the golden child, and they weren’t to do anything to offend me. 

I understood Jared’s motives, and so had they, but I very quickly let them know I wasn’t so fragile; I preferred that they weren’t so formal when they didn’t have to be.
They learned soon enough that I could take just as much as I could dish out.

After stopping for lunch
,
we headed out on our road trip. It actually turned out to be quite a fun adventure, and we decided to make stops to sightsee as often as we wanted. We took turns driving, so during the night we could both sleep. But I wasn’t even interested in sleeping when there were things to talk about and places to see—even in the dark.
And after laughing hysterically when Jared made a very gassy Clyde
ride
with Ben and Curtis
during the night
, I wasn’t even tired.

What would have normally been a fourteen-hour drive took about twenty, but it was well worth it to have Jared to share it with.
The trip was memorable and my heart was full
because I was with an amazing man.

And yeah, Curtis and Ben came in handy on a few occasi
ons when Jared was recognized. A
nd twice we had to
work a little harder to evade some of the more persistent fans. Jared never panicked in these moments. I could tell he was as used to it as getting himself dressed everyday.

We arrived in Kensington around nine a.m. I’d called my family the night before to let them know I’d be there in the morning, and my mom joked that she should probably wait to tell
Braden
that Jared was coming too, just so she didn’t have to listen to him
obsess
about it. Our arrival was interesting because no one knew we’d entered the house until Maggie screamed, “Jared!” and took off across the kitchen to give him a hug. It made me smile, especially because I knew how much Jared had missed her too. Watching him hold her like that
while she rambled on
reminded me of the day in Seattle at the market, and it warmed my heart.

The rest of my family wandered into the front room one-by-one. My brother was last, and lingered in the background as I introduced Jared to my parents. I knew he’d become shy like that
in person
, and I even warned Jared of what to expect. He was prepared for it when he made his way to
Braden
and said, “And you must be
Braden
, the Breaking Point expert. I have a few questions to ask you, if you don’t mind. Maybe you can give me some pointers for our
spring
tour
…”

And that’s all it took to get my brother to start talking. Jared did ask his opinion on a lot of things, from lighting ideas to entering the stage. He actually liked
Braden
’s suggestion that they do
In
My
Dreams
—
the band’s newest release—
with blue effects.

“Cool idea,” he nodded. “
We were talking about that too, and
I will definitely make
it
happen. Have you even been to one of our shows?” he added.

Braden
shook his head no.

Jared gave me that look, and even though I knew what it meant, I was glad that he refrained from saying it out loud until later. He really wanted
Braden
to come on the tour with us.

“You ever heard of school?” I teased as we cleaned
the kitchen
after
lunch. My brother had been sent to take out the trash, and it was the first time we were alone. Jared had even used the thirty seconds to kiss me until we heard the back door
open again
.

“Just an idea,” he smiled as
Braden
entered the kitchen.

Long story short, my parents were convinced that
Braden
could miss three days of school to make a five-day weekend. That way he could see a show in San Diego and a show in L.A.
That said a lot about what my parents thought of Jared. And s
urprisingly my mom and dad were pretty fond of Clyde, and they were willing to be his guardians for those five days
as well
.

I did
get rid of
my brother for an hour when I
rode with Ben and Curtis to take
Jared to the airport around three.
It was hard for me to let him go and we
sat in the car
until the very last minute.

“I love you,”
Jared
said one last time. He kissed me again and said, “I don’t know if I can wait a week to see you, but I’ll do my best.”

While he held me I said, “I love you
,
too. Call me whenever you can.”

“Definitely.”

He left in a hur
ry with
Ben
at his side
,
who was going to fly with him,
and I watched until
they met up with a pair of security guards waiting to escort him. Jared
turned around to smile at me
one last time,
and then disappear
ed
.

A week later Maggie,
Braden
, and I arrived in San Diego. Jared had a car waiting to take us to the hotel from the airport, but it surprised me that Jared was actually
in
the car too. Maggie was in his lap in an instant,
I
was
all smiles
because I was so happy to see him, and my brother had a goofy look on his face because he witnessed Jared kiss me for the first time.

The hotel we stayed in was beautiful. I stood on the balcony to stare at the ocean while Maggie and
Braden
explored our two-bedroom suite. Jared’s room connected to ours and he was right next door, so when he knocked on the adjoining door an hour later, Maggie flung it open without question.

“Who is it?” Jared said in a
girly
voice, reminding her to ask.

“Who else would it be?” she
giggled
as he entered.

“True,” he smiled. “So? What do you guys want to do?”

“Beach!” Maggie
cheered
.

“Eat,” I replied.

My brother just stared at him.

“Well, let’s go eat and then head to the beach,” Jared replied. “
Braden
?
That sound
good
to you
?”

My brother only nodded.

I had to laugh. He was such a dork standing there, idolizing Jared Miller. I didn’t think it made Jared uncomfortable because he was used to it from everyone else in the world, but I didn’t want
Braden
to be like that around
my boyfriend
. I wanted him to feel comfortable around him, and I
know
that’s what Jared wanted too. It had been that way at our house, but once Jared was out in the public with drivers and bodyguards, I think
Braden
reverted to his initial fascination with his status. I figured it would probably take some time for him to
get used to Jared as a person—u
nlike Maggie, who had no clue who he was to the world and didn’t care.

By the second day I think
my brother
was getting used to being around
him
, and he was pretty excited it was concert night. We headed for the House of Blues to watch the sound check, and Jared introd
uced us to the rest of his
band
mates
and crew (we’d met a few of them at the hotel alrea
dy). We ate dinner with several
of them, and then
we hung out backstage while another band opened the show
.
When they were done, Jared said, “Well Maggie… You ready to be blown away?”

She didn’t look too sure about the phrase, but
Braden
answered, “I am!”

I wasn’t too surprised by Breaking Point’s performance because I’d seen a lot of their videos and concert footage since I’d been dating Jared. I’ll admit that it was fascinating to watch my boyfriend have such an effect on people while onstage, and it did blow me away to see it in person. I
loved
the show, and Maggie—being only five years old—just might have been introduced to the love of rock and roll at that point.
Jared had given me muffs to put over her ears to protect her hearing, and I was grateful because the thought hadn’t even occurred to me, but s
he had a blast
experiencing
Jared
’s
perform
ance
.

Mid
way through the show Jared announced that he had a brand new song, and he wanted that particular crowd to be the first to hear it.

“Let
us
know what you
think because we
won’t put it on the next album if it sucks.”

That got a response of laughter, but everyone cheered to hear the new song anyways.

“This son
g is called ‘Never Without You,’
and I wrote it for someone very special. She’s here tonight, and I just want her to know that I mean every word of it.”

My brother looked at me funny and asked, “Is he talking about you?”

I
only shrugged, but e
ven from the first two lines I knew that it was
meant for me
. But as I continued to listen to the song, and I
took into acc
ount that he “meant every word,”
I was a little overcome by what the song was actually about.

I sort of clapped when the song was over—it was mechanical—but it left me with unresolved feelings. It moved me i
n a way that I wasn’t expecting, just like the first time I heard “
Tell Me You’re Mine
” and had to listen to it all night long.

The band performed two more songs and then completed a two-song encore. The show was incredible, and both
Braden
and Maggie were full of smiles when we headed backstage to meet up with Jared again.

Maybe I just took the song a little more personal than I should have because Jared didn’t mention anything about it for the rest of the tour. He didn’t even perform it again
at any of the shows I attended, so
I decided not to mention it unless he did.

We left for L.A. the next afternoon in Jared’s tour bus—which
Braden
thought was just the coolest thing. Stopping at Disneyland was an unexpected occasion. The kids were beyond stoked—
Braden
just as much as Maggie, but for different reasons—and we had an amazing evening there. I was sure that Jared wasn’t that interes
ted in
SoCal
tourist spots since he was around it a lot, but he was great with Maggie and
Braden
, and it kind of felt…like a family vacation. Even though
Braden
was my little brother, it still seemed like Jared and I had our two kids with us.

I began seriously considering his song… I could definitely see myself being happy with him. It was clear that he wanted a future with me, and I knew that from the things he did and said, but I felt bad that I wasn’t able to be as open as he was. I guarded my thoughts
and
feelings a
lot
more.
I realized that he was waiting for me to bring it up first. That was the case, I was sure, because Jared didn’t want to pressure me.

But
I couldn’t even tell him how much his song had
meant to
me.
Perhaps if I were a musician like Jared, writing and singing my heart out all the time, maybe I would be a little more
outspoken
than I was. But I wasn’t practiced in that, and I chose to let Jared express himself in the ways
he
was comfortable, and I would continue to be cautious. I wasn’t sure if that was fair or not, but I couldn’t be someone that I truly wasn’t. Jared was the open book
verbally
, not me.