Love UnExpected (Love's Improbable Possibility) (45 page)

“
The cool ones, yeah. A couple of the broads from around da way come wit’ me, but not too many. They gotta be approved by Petey. Now ‘dat Divine’s big and shit they don’t be wantin’ shit leaked. ‘Dem bitches from around da way be waitin’ on a chance at all ‘dem ballers."

As desperately as I
 wanted to inquire about Azmir's activities there I didn't think I could handle the gut blow if I'd discovered his indiscretions, so I kept my mouth shut, and in good timing as I heard Chanell make the arrangements for ten strippers to appear at a suite at a specified casino that Thursday evening. My mind spun and heart tightened at the chunk of information from that day’s outing of shopping and lunch. 

Insecurity, no matter how concentrated, is a bitch and I think it might have bit me in the rear that day.

~~~~~~~~~~

The following day, after church, Azmi
r called me on my way home and informed me that he made reservations for dinner at a restaurant next to Malibu with a great view of the water before catching his red eye out of town to Atlanta. I flew through the door headed straight to the closet to slip into something less formal and we headed right out. I hated seeing him leave for so many days at a time. Who was I fooling? I hated seeing him leave—period! But dinner was nice and held all the ambiance that a woman could ask for considering the circumstances.

The lights from soft lamps and candles bounced off the ocean
surface as the sun started to set and soft music was mellow and inviting. I'd been sipping on red wine too soon after an empty stomach, feeling a little tipsy. I hadn't eaten since breakfast before church. I was elated once our food arrived, I didn't prefer filling up on breads and salads. 

“
So, are you excited about your trip?”

“
I guess there’s nothing
not
to be excited about when you have big money on the table. Anxious is more like what I’m experiencing. We’ve been in talks with this particular company for nearly eight months now. Finally, they're ready to play ball. In addition to that, Rich informed me this morning that we may have to video conference a telecommunications company out in Canada who actually sought us out. They're tiptoeing on the sale though. We'll see.”

“
And there’s Florida...next week?” I quizzed, hiding my disapproval, though loving his ease at sharing.

“
Yup,” he said after sipping his drink. He caught onto my contempt. “It won't always be like this.”

“
That's good to know,” I murmured, holding my breath. I didn’t want him to know how affected I was by his absence. How attached I’d grown to his presence. I’ve never been needy, yet felt a semblance of it when he was away. I didn’t like it.

“
I remember, years ago, reading an article with Brian McKnight and his wife…
could’ve been Ebony…Essence...JET—I don’t recall
…and she said something along the lines of her not believing their marriage would survive if he did
not
travel as often as he did while working.” My eyes traveled to find his. “They're now divorced, so how on par was she with their need for space?” I asked rhetorically. Melodramatic—but transparent of my heart, thanks to liquid courage.

He shifted in his seat. “
I don’t think spending time apart preserves a relationship. At best it gives time to reflect and evaluate it, but it certainly doesn’t help to edify it.”

I
s he saying that he didn’t like being away from me like this?
I had suddenly become so confused.

“
How long will this last...you know the traveling?”

“
I'm not sure. It’s a part of the business. Is it becoming a problem for you, Brimm? Please be honest and tell me,” he implored. 

I didn
’t know how to respond to that. Heck, no, I didn’t like the separation periods, but there was no way I’d come in between him and his business. I wasn’t worthy of that; no one was.

“
I'm fine, Azmir. How were the scallops? They looked as tasty as I am,” I quipped trying to change the subject. The waiter was removing our plates.

It
earned me a slow chuckle from him. 

“
Not quite as, but they were good. How was your eggplant?” he gave a bashful smirk. He wasn’t expecting my jest.

“
Really good.”

The waiter asked if we wanted to see the dessert menu. I declined not wanting to take up too much of
Azmir’s time. I knew he had a plane to catch that evening, besides I felt I’d overdone it with my main entrée and didn't want to tip the scale later on. To my surprise, Azmir asked to see it and ordered sorbet. 

“
Thanks for relieving me of my Sunday meal responsibilities.” My forehead wrinkled as I was, that quickly, hit with revelation. Clearly, wine didn’t slow my brain. “You know, I don't think you’ve taken me to a bad restaurant yet.”

He smiled.
“And I don't endeavor to. Tell me, what are your plans for the week?”

I took a sip of my wine before answering,
“The usual: counseling, dance, and church. Oh, and awaiting your return on Thursday,” I flirted with a salacious narrowing of the eyes a slow licking of my top lip.

“
Good. As you should,” he smirked in a way that I didn't think I’d seen him do before. “My mother is flying into town next week.”

“
Oh, yeah? Where to?”

“
I've arranged for her to stay at a hotel for a little while until she gets a lay of the land.”

This was news
to me. I recalled offering my place for her to stay indefinitely.

“
Isn't a hotel a bit impersonal? I mean, you just said you don't know how long she’ll be out here.”

He raised his head and put down his napk
in. I had hope I didn’t offend him and didn't mean to intrude, but I knew this town could be a lot to take in.

“
I mean, what are you going to do about her transportation? Is she coming alone? How will she get around or know where to go? With your schedule, you’re unlikely to be around for assistance.”

With narrowed brows he
muttered, “I didn't think about all of that. The hotel plan wasn't permanent, but I figured that was the only way to start. I could take her around to my vacant properties to see if she likes one of them but she’d need time to consider it and get to know the town. I hadn’t thought about transportation. I could arrange for car service,” he sounded doubtful.

“
Azmir, car service may be a means to getting her around, but it won't resolve the issue of knowing
where
to go. It’s not a personal touch. Why didn’t you think to have her stay with us? Heaven knows there’s plenty of room.”

He st
eeled in place, looking me square in the eyes, “Our bubble.”

I understood im
mediately what he meant. We had no visitors until this week, not even Petey had come through, at least since I’d been there. However, this was a special circumstance, it was his mother.

“
I think that could be breached...temporarily. Just until she gets settled. Or you can consider my original offer and let her stay and my place. She can stay as long as she likes.”

His eyes were suspended in the air at the thought.
“We have a few days until she arrives. Give me some time to think about it.”

I didn't understand what he meant by that but
immediately caught on that it was the end of that discussion. I suggested my place to him last week in New York and didn’t know if he had ruled that out or simply forgotten about it.

“How was service today?”
Azmir asked before taking a sip of his Grande Marnier.

I saw a hint of a smile on his face and
rolled my eyes. I knew he was referring to the women in my Bible study group.

“
The morning sermon was good, but I had a few new pew neighbors ask about my morning...
and previous night
. I can’t believe that Rhonda asked if we go to bed at the same time!”

He s
quinted his eyes in confusion. “How did you answer that?”

“
Are you kidding me? I didn’t! She was out of line for that one. Lisa had the gall to
casually
ask about your measurements. She wanted to know how tall you are and your shoe size. I swear, I felt like your little sister instead of...” My words failed me and once again, my private truth peaked. I had no idea what I was to Azmir. 

“
Instead of what?” his lips twitched as if he found humor in my bemusement. He knew my hesitation and wanted to probe at it.
I don’t think so!
I didn’t want to damper the moment but didn’t know how to change the course of the conversation.

“What’
s so funny? Do you think I’d say your wife or something?” I scoffed and rolled my eyes at the thought. Deep down inside I didn’t view it as a joke, rather an impossible task. 

With his eyes widened and in a look of total disarray
, he asked, “What's so funny about
that
idea?”

Crap! Did I offend him?
I didn't intend to. The thought of marriage caused me to cringe because I knew I could never be a valued partner to anyone. It would also cause me to reflect on how dedicated a partner my mother was to my father. It was to a fault and he didn’t appreciate it. I could never put myself in a position to let someone walk all over me and leave when it suited them. 

“
I don’t know. What do you think?” I was at a loss.

The waiter served Azmir his sorbet in a fancy bowl with an obscurely shaped spoon.
Too rich for my blood
.

Azmir nodded in approval, dismissing the waiter and resumed our conversation.

“Well, it’s what I know.” He spooned his ice cream and scooped it in his mouth.
That mouth.
“But I won’t tell. That’ll have to be between my wife and me.”

Though my neck stayed in place, my face fell to the table below. That stung. The thought of Azmir having a connection with another woman made my stomach churn
and my chest tighten in anguish. He was mine and I didn’t want to ruin what we had and allow another woman an opportunity with him. I downed the last of my wine in an attempt to blur the pain I felt in my heart. I was close to drunk and was happy about the shield it provided.

He reached over the table to share his dessert. I didn
’t want it, I was too wounded to be sentimental, but I humored him and ate from it.

“
Would you conduct your affairs with your husband any different from how you are with me now?”
Where’s he going with this?

“That's unfair to ask, Azmir. I’
m far out of bounds where we are now. Unlike you, I’ve never been in a serious relationship.” I shook my head in frustration. “Let's not talk about this.”

He gave his confident chuckle
and signaled for the waiter to bring the check.

Panic struck.

“Azmir, I’m not mad. I don't want to end dinner or rush your dessert.”

Re
aching for his wallet he muttered ever so smoothly, “Oh, nah, we
have
to go, Ms. Brimm. The way I see it is I have three hours before I leave for my flight.” He handed his credit card to the waiter and motioned that he didn’t need to see the bill. “This gives me three hours to provide you with an idea of what sex would be like for my wife.”

To say that I wasn
’t expecting that wouldn’t express my shock. After he cleared the check, we left for the marina.

~~~~~~~~~~

I woke up in a daze. My mouth was dry and my head was slightly spinning. It took seconds for me to realize Azmir was gone and recall that he had caught a redeye flight out to Atlanta. My mood immediately turned somber. I looked at the time on the nightstand and it read three thirty-three in the morning. It was hard to believe he was just here a few hours ago making wild barbarous love to me until I fell asleep in his arms—actually, I had collapsed from total satiation and he wrapped me into his arms just before I dozed off. He was so...bestial that night, I’d hardly recognized him. I grew aroused as I reminisced.

My thirst unpleasantly drug me from memory lane. I slid off the bed to go get something cool to drink. When my feet hit the floor
, I winced from the pain that sapped through my lower back radiating into my hip.
That man was wild last night!
 

After
taking a much needed trip to the bathroom, I made my way into the kitchen in desperate need for something to quench my thirst. I rested against the island and marveled at the sensation of the chilled orange juice traveling the full-length of my esophagus.
Mmmmmmm!
The advent of O.J. was divinely inspired.

Once back into the master suite, I checked my phone and saw nothing from Azmir. I couldn
’t deny the twinge of disappointment I felt from it, but decided to return to sleep before crazy thoughts crept in and took over.