Love Will Find a Way (35 page)

Larry picked up his suitcase and smiled. “Sometimes I think you and Dad both need a keeper. Bye, Mom.” He was gone before Emily could reply.

Emily cleaned the kitchen and then swabbed Boo's wounded ear again. Her hands moved deftly through her tasks, but her heart was heavy. She felt like a small boat set adrift on a vast sea of hopelessness, drifting with the tide and going nowhere.

As she prepared for bed, her depression deepened to despair. She had turned down Dennis's marriage proposal and she was sure her latest tirade had banished Robert from her life forever. With the speed of a thunderbolt, words Aunt Beth had spoken the day of Kevin's wedding jolted through Emily's mind.
When two people are hopelessly devoted, love will find a way.

Closing her eyes, she remembered that terrible, wonderful night in Wimberly when the sudden knowledge of her husband's affair had destroyed their marriage and her future. With that searing recollection came a quickening moment of revelation that burst across her mind like the shattering of a falling star against a midnight sky. Her marriage hadn't failed because her husband had been unfaithful. Her husband had been unfaithful because the marriage had failed and there was a vast difference.

Emily moved like a sleepwalker across the floor. All this time she had given lip service to her own guilt, but she had never truly owned it. She had spoken so eloquently about the merits of forgiveness, but subconsciously she had wanted to retaliate, to hurt Robert as he had hurt her. Was she recognizing too late that revenge is a two-edged sword? Her thoughts moved from questioning intuition to determined insight, an insight that revealed her own duplicity and a startling disclosure. The first step toward reconciliation with Robert was hers. It always had been.

Thirty minutes later Emily pulled into a visitor's parking slot in Robert's apartment complex. She had made the trip that should have taken half an hour in less than fifteen minutes. Stopping the car, she set her brake and dropped her keys into her handbag. The gravel under her feet made crunching noises as she raced across the parking lot. At last, winded and panting, she shoved her shaking finger into Robert's doorbell and waited.

From inside, she heard voices. That meant Robert was home and still awake. Impatiently, she rang the doorbell again.

A male voice called out, “I'm coming. I'm coming.” Footsteps sounded from inside.

Emily hadn't bothered putting on anything at all under her dress. Except for a pair of sling-back sandals, her feet were bare. Running her fingers through her wind-blown hair, she wished she had taken time to put on makeup.

The door opened and Robert stood on the other side dressed in jeans and a tee shirt. He turned a pasty shade of white and held onto the doorknob. “What are you doing here?"

The urge to run was overwhelming, but Emily stood her ground. “I have to talk to you.” Ducking under his arm, she stepped into the apartment. “I know it's late. I know I should have called first. I know—” She paused to catch her breath. “I had to see you. I have to tell you...” Her words tumbled over each other in their haste to be said.

Robert interrupted, “You shouldn't have come here."

As her eyes adjusted to the light, the reason for his rebuff became crystal clear. A young woman reclined in the center of Robert's couch. With one foot tucked beneath her and her hands resting in her lap, she looked completely at ease and very much at home. The woman was Susan Barrett.

The room tilted dangerously. Emily turned to go. “I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"No!” The word exploded from Robert's mouth. Jumping in front of her, he closed the door and leaned against it. “Has something happened to Larry or Kevin?"

"They're both fine.” Once again, she had driven him into the arms of another woman.

"Then it's Boo!” A mixture of determination and fear framed Robert's set features.

"Boo's okay.” She had to get out of here before she made a complete fool of herself.

Robert nodded toward the living room. “Come in and sit down."

"Maybe some other time.” There would be no other time. For Emily, time had run out. The hope of redeeming tonight slipped away on the wings of despair.

Robert grasped her hands and held on. “I can't let you go, not like this."

He had let her go, a long time ago. Emily pulled her hands free. “Get out of my way."

Robert grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her to him. “Not until you tell me why you came here."

She let him lead her to a chair and then folded like a rag doll as he helped her sit down.

Heedless of the young woman behind him, Robert knelt before her. “I know how this must look to you, but I can explain."

From across the room Susan said, “Don't be a fool, Robert."

"Stay out of this. It doesn't concern you.” Emily could almost believe he had forgotten the other woman was in the room.

Susan came slowly to a standing position. “Yes, it does. Don't let her come between us again."

Standing, Robert faced the other woman “There is nothing between us. I'm sorry, so damned sorry."

"You're sorry.” Susan's voice was harsh. “For what, making me fall in love with you and then walking out on me?"

"For that and for any other reason you might have for hating me.” Pain etched itself into the angular lines of his face. “My only defense is I mistook infatuation for love."

"It won't work,” Susan cried. “She doesn't care about you. You told me so yourself."

Is that what Robert had thought? Emily had never stopped caring. She opened her mouth to speak.

Before she could utter a sound, Robert intervened. “Stay out of this, darling.” Turning to Susan, he said, “The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you, but I have. For that I am truly sorry."

With the lithe grace of a sensuous cat, Susan moved across the room. “You said she'd found someone else."

Color rose in Robert's face. “Susan, please..."

Susan's mouth trembled as she stopped a few feet from where Robert stood. “It's your fault.” She pointed an accusing finger in Emily's direction. “You don't love him. Why won't you let him go?"

It was a scene that had all the trappings of cheap melodrama. In spite of her anxiety, Emily smiled. “I believe I had him first."

"But you didn't care when he left. He told me that himself. And the minute he was out the door, you hopped in bed with your lawyer friend.” The vindictive words scalded like steam. Susan caught her breath and then went on, “Now you're sleeping with some holier-than-thou-preacher, right under the noses of your two sons."

Only one person could have provided Susan with that information, Robert. Emily spoke with a serenity she didn't feel. “I've never yet stooped to stealing someone else's husband."

Susan screeched, “You bitch! I—"

Robert's voice cracked like a whip. “Shut up, Susan!"

The look on Susan's face was enough to tell Emily that he had never spoken to her like that before. Her shoulders slumped. “You said—"

"I said a lot of things I wish I could take back.” Robert ran his hand through his hair. “You can say anything you want to me. I deserve it. But I won't stand by and let you attack Emily.” He was standing with his back to her, but Emily felt like he had reached out and touched her. His voice softened. “You came to offer your condolences. You've done that. Why don't you go now?"

Tears stood in Susan's luminous dark eyes. “You really are a fool. Even if you take her back, she won't change."

"The question is will she have me back.” Robert glanced briefly in Emily's direction. “I don't want her to change.” He directed his gaze back toward Susan, “She's perfect the way she is."

Susan made determined strides across the floor. “I won't be back again.” She paused and scorched Emily with a contemptible gaze. “Good luck, Robert. You're going to need it.” The door slammed with a resounding bang.

The echoing sound filled the silence of the room. Robert turned and once again knelt before Emily. “I hope you can believe that I didn't ask her here."

"It doesn't matter anymore.” Robert had sent Susan away, dismissed her as if she meant nothing to him at all. Hope, long fettered, was suddenly set free. “She's been here before, hasn't she?"

"Several times,” Robert admitted. “But never at my invitation."

Until now, Emily had never believed that Robert had been the one who had broken off the affair. Now she did. “You've hurt her badly."

"No worse than I hurt myself and you.” Robert pulled a chair directly in front of Emily and sat in it. “Susan was not some innocent young thing when we met. She knew the score from the very beginning. I'm not making excuses for what I did, but Susan isn't blameless either.” Leaning forward in his chair, he took Emily's hand in his. “I hope we can put this behind us now and leave it in the past where it belongs.” Then straightening, he dropped her hand and leaned back. “Why did you come here?"

One question still hung in her mind, a foolish, trivial inquiry that, for all its insignificance, begged an answer. “Before I tell you that, there's something I have to know."

He closed his eyes and grimaced. “Go ahead, ask."

"Who told Susan about Thad and Dennis?"

After an ensuing silence, Robert opened his eyes and stared at her. “Along with my answer do I get a chance to explain?"

Emily smiled, “Of course."

"I did. When I found out about Thad I was furious. Susan thought I was a little too concerned and she told me so. In a way, that was the beginning of the end for us. We had a terrible row. Things were never the same after that."

"And Dennis?” Emily questioned softly. “Why would you tell her about Dennis? That happened after you'd left her."

A self-deprecating grin spread across Robert's face. “Susan was at the Housing for Humanity banquet. She came here afterward. I had just watched you all evening with Dennis and his family and our sons. It was like a deathblow. I could see another man walking away with everything that should have been mine, could have been mine, if I hadn't been such a fool. I hit rock bottom. Susan was sympathetic and I more or less spilled my guts to her."

He was still convinced that she was sleeping with Dennis. Denial would be useless. “I thought it might have been pillow talk."

"No. She tried her best, but I wasn't interested.” Robert slanted a questioning look in Emily's direction. “It's your turn, why did you come here?"

She didn't know where to start. “Because of something Aunt Beth said to me just before she died."

He arched one eyebrow. “Oh? And what was that?"

"She said when two people are hopelessly devoted to each other, love will find a way."

Robert cocked an eyebrow. “I'm hopeless period without you, my love."

Emily looked into the depths of his questioning eyes. “I love you, Robert. That's all that matters and it's enough for now. That's what I came to say."

"I thought I'd never hear you say those words to me again. I love you, too, so very, very much. Does this mean I get another chance?"

"I was hoping we'd both get another chance.” Emily moved to cover the space between them. “Would you hold me in your arms?” Taking his hands, she pulled him to his feet.

He pulled her into a smothering embrace before holding her from him. “Only if I'm the only one you grant that privilege."

She looked up into his eyes. “I told Dennis earlier today that I couldn't marry him."

Robert expelled a long sigh of relief. “Then it's over between the two of you?"

"Yes,” Emily stated emphatically. “It's over between Dennis and me."

Robert sat down on the couch and pulled her down beside him. “We can make plans to be married as soon as possible."

"I don't want to talk about marriage.” Emily scooted to the far end of the couch. “I'm not ready for that."

His face fell. “You don't want to marry me?"

Nothing short of bald honesty would do now. “I don't know."

Disbelief dropped his voice to a low rumble. “Are you suggesting we have an affair?"

She turned his words over in her mind before saying, “I guess that's what it amounts to. I don't want to rush into a long-term commitment.

Robert's features hardened. “Does your reluctance to commit have anything to do with Dennis Morrison?"

"No. It's over between Dennis and me. I told him earlier today that I couldn't marry him."

Robert reminded her, “You just told me the same thing."

"I said,” Emily corrected, “I didn't want to rush into a long-term commitment. There's a difference.” She scooted back down the couch, slipped her arms around his neck and looked deep into his eyes. “Dennis was never more than a friend to me. I never slept with him. I never loved him."

She knew, even before he spoke, that at long last he could accept her words as the truth. “You're more than I deserve, even on a temporary basis."

She laid her head on his chest and listened to the steady beating of his heart. “We have so many problems to work through. We need time to find ourselves and to find each other again before we even think about marriage."

"I'll accept whatever you offer. But I have to warn you, I'm going to ask you every day to marry me.” His arms tightened around her waist. “For now just having you with me will have to be enough.” He stiffened and held her from him. “You will live with me, won't you?” Pulling her back into his arms, he kissed her deeply, passionately. “I need you, my darling, so much.” His hands caressed her breasts causing them to tingle and tighten.

She laid one finger over his lips. “For now, let this be enough.” Passion, deep and strong, caused her to forget everything but her intense need. “Make love to me"

He covered her trembling lips with his opened mouth. “I will. I do."

Surrendering to his tender demands, she let him transport her to that magical kingdom of the senses.

It was a sensuous, transforming interlude of shared ecstasy. They knew each other so well. How wonderful it was to anticipate each need and reciprocate with gentle sighs and intimate touches. The magical moment soared and climbed to a supreme instant of unbelievable delirium.

Afterward, spent and replete, Emily leaned against Robert's strong shoulder. She was too relaxed to move and too happy to speak.