Loving Laura (The Cantrelle Family Trilogy) (22 page)

Neil watched the emotions drifting across her face, and a futile possessiveness gripped him.

“It was so beautiful,” Laura said, her voice so soft it was almost a whisper. “The sun like golden fingers sliding through the swirling fog, the sound of the bells echoing around me, the convent looming ahead like a great, gray castle.” She shivered, hugging herself. “At that moment I wanted so badly to be a poet or a great writer so that I could capture my feelings on paper.” She laughed in embarrassment. “I fell in love that day. So much so that I even considered becoming a nun myself.” She sighed deeply. “But I didn’t really have a vocation. I was just romanticizing the whole thing. Young girls can be pretty impressionable, you know.”

Neil could see how the young Laura’s romantic streak and the ugliness of her past would combine to produce the feelings she’d had when she’d visited her friend. The otherworldly picture she’d painted of that day would have been very appealing to the girl she was.

“But I’ve really gotten us off the subject,” she said matter-of-factly. “Finish telling me about Willis.”

Neil had to wrench his mind away from his feelings and back to the reason he was there this afternoon. “Well, Willis was always jealous of me, and I was never sure why. He had a lot more money than I did, but that never seemed to satisfy him. He always wanted everything. He especially wanted all the attention, and when he didn’t get it, he’d pout. When he grew up he wasn’t much better. In fact, anything I did, Willis tried to best. He joined the Baton Rouge Police Department three years before I did. I always thought the only reason he joined the force was because he knew that’s what I planned to do and not because he had any great desire to be a cop.”

“Why would he send Alice Kendella ten thousand dollars? Was he a good friend of Jimmy’s?”

“No. In fact, he made fun of Jimmy behind his back. We had words about that a couple of times. I always thought he didn’t like Jimmy because Jimmy and I were so close.”

“Did he know Alice?”

“Not that I know of. Oh, he knew who she was. He probably knew her well enough to say hello to her on the street. But they weren’t friends. Why?”

“I just thought maybe... well, I know this might sound stupid... but I thought maybe he was interested in Alice.”

Neil didn’t even have to think about her suggestion. “No. Willis wasn’t interested in Alice. Believe me, I know that.”

Laura frowned. “How can you be so sure?”

Neil smiled wryly. “Trust me. I have my reasons.” He saw the curiosity on her face, but he didn’t want to tell her about his suspicions concerning Willis’s feelings for Erica. He’d flirted with danger once today by allowing their conversation to become personal. He’d better not risk it again.

“All right. We’ve eliminated friendship for Jimmy, and an interest in Alice. What does that leave? Humanitarian ism?”

Neil thought about Willis. The kind of kid he’d been. The kind of adult he’d turned into. “I have a hard time believing Willis would give up ten thousand dollars strictly out of the goodness of his heart. I
might
believe it if it had been done with a lot of fanfare, because then Willis would have gained something from it. But anonymously? Nope. Not Willis.”

“What then? Guilt?”

“But about what? That’s what’s bugging me.”

“Well, then, that’s what we need to find out.”

An alarm went off in Neil’s mind. He was headed for even more trouble if he spent too much time with Laura. “Look, I appreciate all your help, but you’re not involved in this, Laura.” As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he was sorry they sounded so abrupt.

She shrugged, and turned away, but not before he’d caught a glimpse of the hurt in her eyes.

There were some things that were just too much to ask of a man. “Do you really want to help?”

She nodded. Then she looked up, and Neil knew he was lost. He was stupid. He was playing with fire. He shouldn’t have even let her do what she’d done so far. He should avoid her company at all costs.

He knew all these things. “Okay, you can help me by doing some research,” he said, and was rewarded by the most beautiful smile he’d ever seen.

Laura didn’t see much of Neil for the next two weeks, but her unhappiness had eased. She had the memory of the way he’d looked and acted toward her the day she called Bobbi Cameron to keep her hope alive. And he did stop by the office a couple of times. He only stayed a few minutes, but he brought her up to date on his attempts to find out more about Willis Fontenot and why he’d cared enough about Alice Kendella to send her money anonymously.

In the meantime, Laura was making a few positive changes in her life. She bought herself some new clothes, making a special effort to choose things in brighter colors and more fashionable styles than she’d ever chosen before. She also had lunch with Bobbi Cameron twice and enjoyed both outings. But the most satisfying change was her evolving friendship with Alice.

A couple of days after she’d called Bobbi Cameron about the check, Alice phoned her at the office.

“Hi, Laura. It’s Alice Kendella.”

“Oh, hello, Alice,” Laura said, pleased.

“I wondered if you might like to come over tonight and have dinner with us.”

“I’d love to.”

She fell in love with Alice’s kids and Alice’s house before she’d been there five minutes. Little Lisa, with her pixie face, was adorable, and Jimmy, Jr., with his shy grin and endearing smile, stole her heart. The kitchen, with its bright colors and cozy clutter, reminded her of the kitchen in Celeste’s house. Laura felt instantly at home.

She stayed for hours that night. She even helped Lisa with her bath and little Jimmy with his math homework. Alice protested, saying, “You don’t have to do that, Laura.”

“I want to,” she insisted.

She stayed far too long. She realized it when Alice sat back in her chair and yawned, running her fingers through her short, curly hair. “I’m sorry. It’s not the company, believe me. It’s just that I got up so early this morning.” She sighed. “I have to be at the school bus parking barn by seven each day.”

“Who watches the kids?” Laura asked.

“My next door neighbor.”

Laura realized that Alice’s life, even though fuller, was much more complicated than her own. All she had to worry about was herself. Well . . . and two cats. But Alice was responsible for the lives of two young children. Still, Laura would trade places with Alice any day of the week. Alice was needed. And loved. She was a part of that elusive circle.

Since that night, Laura had visited Alice two more times. And now here she was again. She’d stopped in impulsively on her way home from work and Alice asked her to stay for dinner.

“We’re just having spaghetti and there’s plenty,” Alice urged when Laura, out of politeness, started to say no.

They had just finished their dinner and Laura was helping Alice clear the table with the doorbell rang.

“Wonder who that could be?” Alice said. She disappeared in the direction of the front door. Laura opened the dishwasher and began putting the dirty dishes inside. But when she heard Alice open the front door and say, “Neil!” her heart zoomed into her throat.

She only had a couple of minutes to get her emotions under control before Alice, followed by Neil, entered the kitchen.

“Look who’s here,” Alice said, watching Laura’s face intently.

Laura was too flustered and too busy trying to act nonchalant to take the time to wonder why Alice had looked at her so oddly. “Hi, Neil.”

“Well, hi.” He smiled, and Laura’s heart flopped over. His smile had a way of turning her knees to water. “I’m glad you’re here. I came over to tell Alice what progress I’ve made concerning Willis.”

A few minutes later they were all sitting around the table with cups of coffee in front of them.

“So what have you found out?” Alice asked Neil.

“Well, I’ve called everyone I could think of who might be able to give me some clue about why Willis would have sent you that money. I’ve had to be careful because I didn’t want to tell anyone about the money. It was pretty tricky. Also frustrating because I know no more than I did when I started. No one seemed to know anything, or if they did, they were hiding it.”

“There’s got to be something,” Alice said.

“I don’t know. Maybe we’re just blowing smoke. Maybe Willis was just being a good guy, and there’s nothing to learn.”

“Why don’t we go over everything that happened that night?” Alice suggested. “Maybe we’re missing something.”

“Are you sure you want to?” Neil asked. “If it’s going to be painful for you, we don’t have to.”

How nice he is, Laura thought. How stupid I was to be jealous of him and his feelings for Alice.

Alice smiled sadly. “This might seem strange to you, Neil, but I need to talk about it. Everyone has avoided the subject for so long.”

“Talking helps,” Laura said, giving Neil an encouraging look.

“Over the past three years, the only person who seemed to understand my need to talk about Jimmy has been my father,” Alice said, “but Dad wasn’t there that night, and wasn’t there, so the only thing we’ve been able to discuss is our feelings.” She sighed deeply. “And now I want to know everything else. I
need
to hear the rest if I’m ever going to put this completely behind me.”

So they went over everything. Detail by detail.

“Neil...” Laura said when they were finished. She’d just had an idea. “Why did your wife follow you, do you know?”

“Yes, I wondered about that, too,” Alice echoed.

His brows knitted. “I guess because she didn’t believe me when I told her I was on a stakeout. I don’t know. It’s one of the things I’ve always wondered about.”

“Had she ever doubted you before?” Alice asked.

“No. We’d had plenty of arguments about my being gone so much of the time. And about my not paying enough attention to her. You know, the usual stuff...” His voice trailed off, and he looked at Laura.

She knew he was uncomfortable talking about what he viewed as his shortcomings in front of her.

“But had she ever acted as if she didn’t believe you when you said you had to work?” Alice persisted. She turned to Laura. “She was jealous of the time Neil spent away from her, but I’d never known her to think he might be cheating on her. Everyone who knew Neil knew he would never do anything like that, anyway.”

“No,” Neil said slowly, “she was too sure of her hold on me to think I might be interested in another woman.”

“Then
why,
that night of all nights, did she follow you?” Alice said.

“I don’t know.”

Laura hesitated, then said, “Didn’t you ever ask her?”

“No.” He looked down at his cup. “I’d been unhappy with my marriage for a long time, and what happened that night was the final straw. I was so sickened by everything that I didn’t care if I ever saw Erica again. In fact, the only time I
did
see her was when I went home to pack my clothes. The divorce, everything, was handled by our attorneys.”

“Well, I think you should ask her,” Alice said slowly.

“I just don’t see what her reasons have to do with Willis Fontenot and his gift to you,” Neil said.

“Weren’t you always telling me he was in love with her? Didn’t we sit at this very table—you, me, and Jimmy—and talk about that very subject?”

“Yes.”

Laura digested this surprising information. She wondered how Neil had felt about that. Had Erica been interested in Willis Fontenot? How could she be, with Neil as her husband?

“Well, then,” Alice continued, “there could be a link between her following you and Willis’s interest in her.”

“That’s really stretching things, isn’t it?”

“I think Alice is right,” Laura said, hoping he wouldn’t think she was interfering.

“Besides,” Alice added, “you’ve got to start somewhere.”

“So you two think I should call Erica and ask her why she followed me?” He didn’t sound irritated, just thoughtful.

“Yes,” Alice and Laura said in unison. Then they both laughed.

Neil scowled at them, but Laura could tell he wasn’t really angry. “Okay, you win. If it’ll make you happy, Alice, I’ll do it. I’ll call her tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow! Call her tonight. Use my phone.” Her gray eyes were eager.

Part of Laura wanted him to call Erica tonight, too. The other part of her didn’t want to be anywhere near him when he talked to his ex-wife.

“No, I can’t,” he said quickly, darting a look at Laura.

Comprehension wiped out the eagerness in Alice’s eyes. “Oh, sorry. You don’t want to talk to her in front of us. That was pretty stupid of me to suggest it, wasn’t it?”

“That’s not it.”

But of course, that was it, and Laura knew it.

For the rest of the evening, the three of them didn’t talk about Erica, or the night Jimmy died, or anything to do with the past. Instead, Alice provided some much needed relief from serious subjects with a funny tale about how Baron, the family dachshund, had eaten little Jimmy’s homework. “He took one look at that paper with jelly beans pasted all over it, and before I knew what had happened, the homework was inside Baron’s stomach, and little Jimmy was outraged. He knew his teacher wasn’t going to believe him if he told her the dog ate his homework!”

Laura and Neil both laughed.

Laura wasn’t sure if she was glad or sad when the evening was over. She hugged Alice goodbye, then turned awkwardly toward Neil. But he covered the awkward moment by saying, “I’ll walk out with you.”

For a few minutes, as they emerged into the navy night, Laura pretended they were going home together. She took a deep breath of the balmy night air filled with the scent of oleanders and spring and wished with all her heart for a miracle.

Neil walked around to the driver’s side of her car and opened the door for her. He waited.

She looked up, and their eyes met. His were dark and gleaming in the moonlight.

“Good night, Neil,” she said softly. She wondered if he could hear her heart beating.

“Good night, Laura.” Then he bent down and kissed her cheek lightly. “Drive safely.”