Made To Love You (9 page)

“Hey,” I whisper as I walk past smiling.

Bentley, Zeke, Logan and Nikki are on the other side of the aisle along with a few of Mason and Cooper’s friends who I recognize. There are also a few I don’t know, too, probably some of Mason’s teammates. And even Cole was able to make it from touring around the country. The wedding is small, intimate and perfect for them since everything else in Mason and Hailey’s world is so crazy and busy.

I step up, take my place next to Chloe and then watch as MacKenzie walks down the aisle. The music changes, everyone stands as Hailey and Andrew stand in the doorway. I take a quick glance over at Mason, he stands there slack-jawed and had stopped breathing until Cooper nudges him. Mason’s shoulders rise as he takes a deep breath and then the fall as he exhales. His eyes still not wavering off Hailey, I’m not sure he sees anything else until they take their first step down the aisle. That’s when he notices his dad is walking Hailey down the aisle. His jaw closes as his smile lights up his whole face and I swear I see his eyes tear up. There couldn’t have been a more perfect moment.

I know that was an important part in Hailey and Mason’s relationship. Hailey never relied on anyone in life except Mason. He’s who she called every time she needed help, every time she just needed someone to lean on, every time she just needed him. Yeah, she had MacKenzie but there was always a bond between Mason and Hailey that no one could compare with. Now, Hailey is accepting Mason and his whole family as hers. She’s no longer alone, she’s got a real family now and not just with Mason and the twins.

After Hailey has just about made it to where Mason is waiting for her I cave and look over to Cooper. I’ve been trying to avoid his stare the whole time because I don’t want him to see how bad I want this for us. He knows it on some level but I also know that our relationship is still so new and we’re both busy but I’d throw it all away if I could just call him my husband.

I’m still seeing the therapist that I promised Cooper I would see. I’ve told her how I feel about Cooper, explained that I want my mom to see me walk down the aisle before stuff got too bad. I know she’s spoken with Cooper a time or two, Cooper’s told me, but never what they spoke about. I remember sitting on that black rocking chair and asking her if she thought I was crazy for wanting to marry Cooper after everything we’ve been through, being so young, and now with what my mom is going through. I even admitted I was a little jealous of what everyone else had and I didn’t have. Dr. Leighton stared at me, jotted down some notes in that stupid notebook of hers, and said, “The heart wants what the heart wants.” My heart wanted this and I needed Cooper’s heart to want the same.

I stole a glance his way and watched Cooper’s lip move, he told me he loved me and I mouthed them right back. I was in my own world when I realized I missed Hailey saying her vows because Mason was already saying his.

“I want your heart, your love, your laughter, and your smiles,” I hear Hailey take a shuddering breath. “I want your thoughts, your visions, and your future. I want everything with you, Hailey,” Mason turns his head so that he can see his babies, “Alexis and Caleb. We may have done things a little backwards but those backwards moments are what brought us to the here and now and they are ours and no one else’s.”

The wedding officiant asks for the rings. Ryder and Alex, with a little help from Hunter and Jackson, step up and hold out their pillows. Cooper unties the rings from each of the pillows and then winks at them and they go back to standing in front of their dads.

The rings are blessed and the officiant glances down to his watch. It must almost be midnight. Goosebumps cover my body.

“Hailey and Mason, you have committed yourselves to each other in marriage. Having pledged your faith and love to one another in the presence of witnesses, by the exchange of your wedding vows and the giving and receiving of the rings. It’s with great joy and happiness, and by the power vested in me, that I now pronounce you husband and wife.” Fireworks go off all around us and light up the entire room. “You may now kiss your bride.”

Like everyone has always said, their love isn’t sweet or simple. It’s hot and loud but just not messy anymore.

Cooper and I are on the dance floor wrapped in each other’s arms. The wedding reception is in full swing now. He leans in and kisses my forehead as we dance alongside Hailey and Mason.

“Am I going to get to dance with my sister-in-law?” Cooper asks Mason.

Hailey has the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on her face. Her dreams have finally came true.

“Keep your hands where I can see them,” Mason stares his brother down.

I giggle. Boys will be boys.

Mason lets go of his bride and then holds his hand out for me. “May I?”

I slip my hand into his. “Of course.”

Mason wraps his arms around me. Even though he’s Cooper’s twin and they are mostly the same, they are so different in so many ways. Cooper is reserved and quiet where Mason is loud and demands attention wherever he is.

I giggle to myself.

“What’s so funny?”

“Girls across the country are in mourning.”

He turns on the charm by giving me that panty-dropping smile that all the girls love. “You mean girls across the
world
are in mourning.”

I laugh while shaking my head. “Oh sorry, what was I thinking?”

He chuckles. “Clearly you weren’t. I’ll let it slide this time.”

“Well, how thoughtful of you.”

I sigh. “Hailey’s a lucky girl, Masey.”

He shakes his head disagreeing with me. “After having the twins, I fell more in love with her and I didn’t think that was possible. So I think I’m the lucky one.”

We’re quiet for a bit as our bodies sway back and forth to the music and I let his words sink in. I watch my mom dancing with Ryder and my eyes tear up. I hold it together as best as possible but Mason notices. He brings his body closer to mine, hugging me tightly.

“It’ll be okay,” he whispers just loud enough for me to hear.

I can’t respond because I’m afraid that if I do I’ll wind up breaking down.

“Can I step in?” My brother says startling me.

I take a step back from Mason and my brother takes his spot. “Hey.”

“Hey.” He looks a little uncomfortable with himself.

“You okay?”

He doesn’t answer right away just holds me a little tighter. “Yeah, just felt like dancing with my little sister.”

I like that. I like that he came to me. It shows that maybe he’s ready to finally talk to me about the shit that went down last year. I think it’s time we bury it.

“I’m glad she’s having a good time,” Hunter nods towards mom.

I get a little choked up again after burying those feelings just a few moments ago. I swallow a few times trying to keep the emotions from bubbling up. “She’s having a great time with Ryder.” And as I watch her I can’t help but let the tears free. I lean my head on Hunter’s shoulder. “What if she’s not here for my wedding? Not here when I have babies? Not here when I just need mom.” It’s the first time I’ve ever said those words out loud and I never pictured saying them to him of all people.

Hunter leads me from the dance floor and out on the balcony. It’s freezing since it’s the middle of winter but there are enough heaters scattered around to keep us a little bit warm.

Hunter pulls out a chair for me to sit in then he takes one and pulls it in front of me. He takes my hands in his. “I’m going to be here, Jay.
Me,
just like I’ve always been for you.” He swears. “I’ll always be here, no matter what, but you can’t think like that, okay? Mom is strong, one of the strongest women I know. But I know someone who is just as strong.”

“Who?”

“You.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you, what you went through isn’t something a lot of people can get past.” He lets go of my hands and scratches at the side of his face. “I had a hell of a time getting over it and it didn’t even happen to me. I wasn’t there to pick up the pieces for you and you left me in the dark about the whole thing.”

And there it is…the root of our problem.

“You were so pissed at
me
though.”

He shakes his head. “I wasn’t mad at you completely. I was more pissed at myself and that fucking asshole who had his hands on you.” He blows out a deep breath. “Last year when you told me you had to tell me something I thought it was going to be that you were getting married or some crazy shit like that. I had no idea that you were dealing with that
situation
,” he can’t even say the words, “for that long by yourself.” He starts talking faster, he’s getting more pissed off again and that’s not what I want.

“It’s because that’s the way I had to deal with it, Hunter.” I grab his hands like he did mine. “When Cooper found me in that room I was so thankful. If that asshole would have gone further than he did I wouldn’t be the same person I am today. I had to work all of that out in my head and then I had to move on for
me,
bury that shit in the past.” I really hope he understood what I was trying to say. “I put myself in that situation,
me
, all by myself and I had to be the one to get myself out. Cooper was there—”

“But it should have been me,” he interrupts. “You’re my sister; I should have been there to protect you just like I always have.”

“And that’s where you’re wrong.” I smile sadly at him. “Yes, I’m your sister but you have your own family to take care of, Hunter. I couldn’t put this on you when I had Cooper there for me. He held me when I needed to be held. He washed away the fears that I had. He was my rock during all of that.”

“But yet he still held you at an arm’s length all that time.”

“He did.” I nod, I’m not going to lie. “He did because he saw what happened to me. He saw the damage that had been done. He blamed
himself
for pushing me away when he should have kept me by his side.” I look down to his hands. “He blamed himself for what happened to me.” A tear slips down my cheek and lands in Hunter’s hand.

He tips my chin up. “I still wish that you would have called and told me about it when it happened. I feel like I failed at being your big brother.”

“You’ll never fail at being my big brother,” I assure him.

“Just know that I’ll always be here for you no matter what. Even if it’s something so stupid like you cut your finger open, you need a Band-Aid and Cooper isn’t there. Just call me.”

“Just call you,” I say nodding my head.

“So will you ever tell me what his name is?”

“Never,” I shake my head. He wants Kevin’s name so that he can do a background check on him and then probably hunt him down. “It’s buried in the past where it’ll stay forever.”

I don’t want to relive those moments when I had to tell Hunter, the look and the anger, a simmering violence just underneath Hunter’s protective façade.

Boy was he pissed when he found out.

My heart started hammering and my stomach twisted. “Okay, there is something I think I’m ready to tell you, too.”

Hunter nodded his head. “I’m listening.”

“Just hear me out before you say anything, okay? I just need to get it out.”

“Alright.”

“Cooper, Eli and I went to a party at one of the frat houses. A few hours passed and one of my friends introduced me to a guy. After countless beers I wasn’t thinking clearly with all the alcohol in my system. I started to feel the room spin and I suddenly didn’t feel very well. I started to get really hot and thought maybe I had drank more than I realized. The guy I was with brought me up to his room, said it was cooler since he had the air on.” I started crying because this is the hard part. “He slipped something in my drink.”

“Jay,” Hunter warns, “don’t fucking tell me something happened.”

Before his mind takes off in a different direction I tell him. “He didn’t rape me but it came pretty damn close.”

“Where the fuck was Cooper?” Hunter seethes. His nostrils flared and his jaw was set.

“He saved me.”

“Why the hell didn’t you ever tell me? Jay, I didn’t put up a fight that you wanted to go there because I thought you’d be safe.” He hauls off and punches the side of his truck.

“I’m fine. Cooper was there.”

“You made me a promise that if anything happened to you while you were there you would tell me.”

“I’m telling you now!” I yelled back.

“But you broke your promise!”

“Hunter,” I take a step towards him and he backs away. My brother has always been there for me. He stepped up when our dad checked out.

“Just don’t, alright. Just don’t.”

He stormed into the back yard, gathered up MacKenzie and Ryder and left.

Hunter frowns until the patio door opens and his wife appears. “There you two are.” MacKenzie steps out and Cooper follows behind her. “I got worried.”

“See,” I tease Hunter.

He smirks knowing I was right that he has his own family to worry about. “Alright, maybe you have a little point.”