Make You Mine (21 page)

Trying to lighten the mood, Caress dropped her eyes down to the bulge straining against the front of his pants. “Very hard I see,” she said with an arch of her brow and tongue in cheek.

Julius blessed her with a smile but his eyes remained serious. “We've lost two months, Caress. Let's work this out. It's worth it.”

She remained silent as she nibbled on the tip of her thumbnail and looked at him. He nodded and reached out to stroke her cheek softly before turning and leaving the apartment.

Julius walked into Don's Diner, the bustling eatery on Nye Avenue in Irvington. The spot was just as crowded as any other Saturday morning but he immediately spotted Kendrick sitting at the counter waiting for him. “Thanks for coming, man,” he greeted his friend as he removed his black suede overcoat and leather gloves before he took a seat on a stool.

Kendrick wiped his mouth with a napkin before giving Julius a pound. “No problem. No problem. So what's up?”

Julius ordered his favorite breakfast of corned beef hash, scrambled eggs and cheese, and home fries before swerving a little to face Kendrick. “I need some advice about Caress.”

Kendrick laughed a little as he picked up his fork to shovel a heap of his grits, eggs, and bacon into his mouth. “Stubborn huh?”

Julius just shook his head. “It's been a week since I came at her about getting back together and still nothing.”

“I got a stubborn one at home. You know that.”

“But the problem is before last week I was resolved to leave her alone. Love or no love, I was done. Finished. Finito. Stick me with a fork I'm—”

Kendrick eyed him. “You been hanging around my wife too much.”

Julius laughed, giving the waitress a smile as she set his cup of coffee before him. “Anyway, man, seeing Caress all laughing and hugged up with that dude shook me up. I was ready to beat that Negro's ass and then it hits me: This is my woman. Mine.”

Kendrick nodded and continued to eat.

“I want my woman back, man,” Julius stated with clear intent in his eyes. “I want things back like before.”

“Or better,” Kendrick added around a deep sip of his own brew.

Julius looked at him curiously. “Huh?”

“The next level man. Step up,” Kendrick said simply.

“I asked her to move in with me already.”

“Like free milk, huh?” Kendrick leveled his eyes on Julius over the rim of the cup.

“First off, I can't even get her to get back together with me and you want me to propose?” Julius balked.

“I didn't say propose but have you even
thought
about marrying Caress one day?”

Julius was glad when the waitress set his food before him because the truth was he hadn't thought about it.

“I didn't think so,” Kendrick said, signaling for a refill of his cup. “If you can't figure out what you want from the relationship in your head and in your heart then how can you expect that of Caress…or any other woman for that matter?”

Marriage?
Julius said to himself.
Mini-vans. Joint bank accounts. Completely and totally together spiritually, physically…and legally?
Julius picked up his fork. “Marriage is a whole 'nother level,” he said out loud, pushing his eggs around with his fork.

“Sure is.” Kendrick let out a little belch as he placed his elbow on the counter by his now empty plate. “You're so quick to call her your woman and get jealous over some other man, but you never thought about marriage…even five years down the line or something? Humph. The way to truly make a woman yours is as old as time, brotha. You better recognize it.”

Julius let out a long and extremely heavy breath as he pushed his plate away.

 

Caress eyed the finance papers for a long time as she sat in one of the small and cramped cubicles in the rear of the car lot. It was more than just her signature on paper. It was three and half years of car payments and full insurance coverage.

Two new bills.

But it also meant a reliable ride. No more riding around with her fingers, toes, and eyes crossed that her little hoop-tie didn't poop out on her and Justin.

“Miss Coleman.”

Caress looked up at the elderly white man sitting across from her.

“Everything okay?” he asked, looking like his too small shirt had him locked in a bear hug.

Caress reached down for her locket and opened it to look down at the picture of her and her baby. Willing to take on the extra burdens for him alone, she closed the locket, picked up the pen, and quickly signed her name next to all the spots marked for her with an
X
.

Nearly two hours later Caress left behind her hooptie as a trade-in and pulled out of the car lot on Route 22 in Union in her silver Honda Civic. She was proud of herself. It was an early Christmas present for her and her son.

Caress was blasting her worn out copy of Lauryn Hill's CD when her cell phone vibrated from where she had it sitting between her thighs. She quickly checked the caller ID, thinking—and hoping—it was Julius. It wasn't. Pushing aside her disappointment that Julius's daily phone calls were noticeably absent today, Caress flipped the phone open. “Hey, Tam-Tam,” she said, turning the CD player down and then pressing the button to put the cell on speakerphone. “How's Justin?”

“Right here looking in my face and tearing up this bottle with his greedy self.”

Caress smiled. Just about the only time he cried was if he was hungry or sitting in poop. “I should be there in about twenty minutes,” she told her, slowing down in traffic.

“Did you get the car?”

“Yup.”

“Good. I'm proud of you, and you needed it. You have to treat yourself sometimes for working hard.”

“Thanks.” Caress set the phone down on the console and steered with both hands as she came up on a winding section of the road. “Uhm…have you guys heard from Julius today?”

“Not me, and Kendrick's not here so I don't know if he did.”

Caress chewed the gloss from her full bottom lip.

“Ready to get back with your boo?” Tamara teased.

“It's just weird he hasn't called at all today, that's all.”

“Girl, you don't know what you want,” Tamara said. “Just yesterday you was saying him calling you twice a day wasn't exactly giving you space.”

Caress remained silent in the face of truth.

“Do you know what you want, Caress?”

“No, I don't,” she answered with honesty. “Hey, Tamara, I'll talk to you when I get there.”

“All right.”

Caress picked up the phone to snap it closed before she pulled her car into the parking lot of a supermarket.

Had Julius given up?

Had he changed his mind?

Had someone new caught his attention?

Was he tired of her waiting for some huge sign that they had a real future?

Caress let her head fall back against the headrest as she twisted and turned her cell phone in her hand. She flipped it open to call him but then flipped it back closed again.

She had asked for time. Maybe he just needed some of his own.

Or maybe he regretted last Sunday—the thought only increased her reservations.

Releasing a heavy breath, she drove her car back into the heavy Saturday afternoon traffic resolved not to let figuring out what Julius was up to now get her down.

 

“
I've missed you, Caress. Tell me what I have to do to make you mine.”

She sighed as Julius pressed a row of sweet kisses to her neck, each one more delicious than the last. “I will always be yours,” she promised as she easily spread her shapely legs and welcomed his hardness into her warmth with a sharp hiss of pleasure.

“Julius, Julius, Julius,” she sighed in reply to each delicious thrust.

 

“Julius…Julius—”

Brrrnnggg
.

Caress's eyes popped open as she lay in the middle of her bed with her sheets tangled with her limbs and her mouth still open from moaning his name out loud. Even with the brutal December winds raging outside she felt like her body was on fire.

Brrrnnngg.

“Not again,” she sighed as she wiped the sweat from her brow and her cleavage with a trembling hand.

Night after night after night her dreams were filled with Julius. It seemed the more she faced her internal battle of what to do with their relationship the more her frustration was transforming into pure lust at night.

Brrrnnngg
.

Rubbing her eyes, Caress rolled over in the darkness and grabbed her cordless phone. “Hello?”

“Congratulations on your new car.”

Caress's eyes opened in surprise at the sound of Julius's masculine tones coming through the phone line. Goose bumps raced down her arms as she sat up in the middle of the bed. “Thanks.”

“You got
all
your money's worth out the other one,” he joked.

Caress laughed low in her throat, mindful of Justin sleeping in his bassinet. She settled back down in the bed finding comfort on her piled-high pillows.

“I just called to check on Justin and to see if I could pick him up Friday instead of Saturday?”

Caress's face filled with disappointment. “Oh…okay. Sure. Yeah. No problem,” she said, wanting to smack herself upside the head at how flustered she sounded.

“Well, I'll let you get back to sleep,” he said.

Caress's eyebrows drew in close as she tried to ignore that her feelings were hurt by his obvious distance. “Okay, see you Friday then.”

“Good night, Caress.”

“Good—”

The sound of the dial tone cut her off. Her mouth dropped open as she stared at the phone in disbelief.

 

The following week seemed to drag by for Caress. Friday just wouldn't come fast enough for her. And she was ready for TGIF because she had something up her sleeves for Julius Jones. His sporadic and brief calls centered around Justin had continued.

Was he just playing with her head and heart a couple of weeks ago?

Was it a ploy to get some baby mama bed play?

What happened to all that love and all the worthy risks?

“Baby, your mama is going to show your daddy just what he's missing,” Caress said to Justin as he sat in his motorized swing playing with one of his many colorful rattles.

Studying her reflection in the mirror, she twisted and turned this way and that. Her hair was a riot of curls, her make-up heavier than normal and her long sleeve tee and jeans tighter than usual.

“Humph.”

She was spraying every possible heated spot on her body with perfume when there was a knock at her door. “Show time, Justin,” she called over to her baby, who focused on drooling over his toy as she slipped her feet into three-inch gold heels.

Walking carefully so that she wouldn't trip, Caress made her way to the door. She almost stumbled as her ankle turned in, but she held her hands out to steady herself. “Get it together, Caress,” she warned herself, straightening her spine and making her way to the door without incident.

She pulled the door open with a smile that faded at the sight of Ahmad. “Hey,” she said, sounding as unenthusiastic as she felt.

“Wow, you look different,” he said, taking her all in.

Caress held up her hand and eyed him with an I'm-not-in-the-mood look. “Cool your jets, playboy, I got enough man drama,” she drawled, stepping out of her heels to kick them away from her.

“No, cool
your
jets, playgirl, because I got enough man drama of my own,” he countered.

It took just a moment for that to register with Caress, but once she got it her mouth shaped into an
O
. “Uhm, okay. All right. I got it,” she said, thinking he was so different from Dwayne. So very different. She had no idea this man was gay.

For a sec she thought about hooking him up with Dwayne, but wasn't it wrong to assume they would get along when the only thing they seemed to have in common was their sexual preference?

Ahmad smiled like he was used to her reaction from others. “Anyway, I just wanted to ask you to watch my apartment this weekend while I'm out of town.”

“Sure. No problem,” she told him, crossing one ankle behind her leg. “And have fun.”

He turned with a brief wave but then turned back. “I'm gay, but I know a woman trying to bait a man. So you have fun this weekend too.”

Caress arched her eyebrow. “Actually I'm trying to make one see what he's missing and not what he's getting—cause he ain't getting it.”

Ahmad shook his head. “And I thought men played games.”

He laughed as he jogged up the stairs.

Caress stepped back inside her apartment and closed the door. She was headed back to her bedroom for a pair of shoes with a lower heel when she heard the front door to the building slam closed. She hurried across the living room floor, almost slipping, trying to rush back into her heels. Forcing herself to take deep and steadying breaths to calm down, Caress walked to the door slowly just as there was a knock at the door.