Man of Honor (Passion in Paradise Book 4) (56 page)

Honor bit her lip and
bobbed her head slightly.  “Remember your promise to me.”

Zeke took a deep
breath as he stared into Honor’s cloudy eyes.  “I’ll remember.”

“I’m so sorry, Zeke. 
It was Sherry,” Honor confessed, ripping off the band aid and blurting the
truth out in a rush.

Zeke stared at Honor
for a long moment, his normally sharp gaze temporarily vacant.  “No,” he
finally whispered, shaking his head slightly.  “It was Sherry?  Sherry Lawson?”

Honor nodded.  “I’m
sorry, Zeke.  She’s in the video, too.  At first, I recognized her by the shoes
she was wearing that night, but then her name was said and I heard her voice,
and I recognized it.  But I knew for sure when Angie reminded her how mad she
was at you for leaving her that night…”

“Wait,” Zeke
interrupted, cupping his hand around Honor’s shoulders gently.  “They mentioned
me
?  The woman I took on a date the night you were kidnapped… the night
those fuckers hurt you… she stood there while you were being
raped
and
bitched about
me
?  I knew those two were friends, but…I just…holy
fuck!
”

Honor took a shaky
breath as she met Zeke’s livid eyes.  “Sherry was angry with you.  And me. 
Apparently you got off that night with her, but you couldn’t be bothered to
make sure she was taken care of because you were worried about me.  You left
her high and dry to go over to Aunt Orla’s and make sure I got home,” Honor
whispered.

“Son of a bitch!”
Zeke roared, every muscle in his body tensing as he carefully sat Honor gently
to the side and surged to his feet.  “I’m gonna
kill
that fucking
bitch,” he snarled, furious.

“Zeke…”

“She knew!  That
fuckin’ bitch knew where you were the entire time we searched for you!  Jesus
Christ,” he bit out, shoving a hand through his dark hair and fisting it
against his scalp.  “That cunt fucking
prayed
with me to find you,
Honor!”

Scalding tears rolled
down Honor’s cheeks again as she witnessed his rage.  His dissolution.  “I’m
sorry.”

“No, baby.  No!” Zeke
denied, shaking his head as he stared at the wall.  “I’m the one who’s sorry. 
She punished you because of
me
.”

“Zeke, no.  From the
way it sounded on the video, she wanted them to stop, but they threatened her.”

“I was a fucking cop
even back then,” Zeke clipped out.  “She knew I’d have protected her if she’d
come to me and told me what was going on.  She just took the easy way out.  She
looked out for herself and left you to a pack of vultures.  And I put my
fuckin’ dick in her on a regular goddamned basis – before AND after!” he raged,
slamming his fist into the surface of the desk.

“Zeke, please stop,”
Honor wept, jerking sharply when he slammed his fist into the desk for a second
time.  She knew he’d never hurt her, but she wasn’t so sure he wouldn’t hurt
himself if he didn’t calm down.  Briefly, she thought about calling out for
Diego to help her, but she instinctively knew Zeke would hate anyone seeing him
at a weak moment.  They had that in common.

Freezing when he
heard the frightened tremor in Honor’s fragile voice, Zeke turned contrite eyes
toward her.  “Shit!  I’m sorry.  Fuck, I’m an asshole,” he began to apologize,
going to his knees in front of her again.  “I lost my temper, baby, but it’s
because I fucked up touching that bitch, bringing her into our lives.  Not
because of you.  Don’t be scared of me,” he begged, his face tight with
remorse. 

“I’m not,” she denied
brokenly as he pulled her back into his arms and buried his hot face against
her neck.  “I don’t want to hear you talk about being with her… like that.  I
accept that it happened and it’s in the past, but I can’t listen to you say
stuff like that.”

“I know.  I was a
thoughtless prick,” he said roughly, lifting his head to meet her tired eyes. 
“I’m sorry.  So fucking sorry,” he kept apologizing, lifting his hands to wipe
the tears from her cheeks. 

“Its okay, Zeke. 
Really.  It’ll be fine,” Honor sniffled.

“I can arrest her. 
What she did was a clear obstruction of justice.  From what you said, the video
confirms that in spades.  Christ, there are a shitload of charges I can throw
at her.”

“Zeke, no… she has a
husband and a six year old little boy,” Honor denied, catching his hand in hers
and squeezing it.  “We can’t do that to her family.”

“The hell I can’t,”
Zeke countered flatly.  “She turned her back on a child being raped.  A good
prosecutor could probably convince a jury that she was an accessory to the
crimes themselves.  She’s going to pay, Honor.”

Honor closed her
eyes.  She’d know Zeke would want vengeance.  Heck, a part of her did, too. 
But ruining a six year old little boy’s life to get her pound of flesh…she
wasn’t sure how she felt about that.  “Maybe she knows something, Zeke.  Maybe
she can tell us who the other two men were that hurt me.  Couldn’t she make a deal? 
Help us and we don’t pursue criminal charges?”

Zeke stared at Honor
with his mouth hanging open.  “You’re kidding, right?”  Shaking his head, he
tilted his head to stare at the ceiling.  “I wanna dance across the bitch’s
grave after I personally put her in it, and you want to offer her a plea
agreement.  How the hell can you give a single shit about what this will do to
her life?  Fuck her, Honor.  You deserve some goddamn justice.”

“I do,” Honor agreed
softly.  “And you’ll get it for me.  Just not from Sherry.”

“Why?” Zeke bit off. 
“You owe that bitch no loyalty.  She left you there with those animals.”

“I know, Zeke.  But
I’ve seen Sherry several times over the last eight years.  Oh, she’s never
spoken to me… hell, she’d barely look at me.  I guess I understand why now. 
But, she and her husband come into the café every so often to eat with their
son.  And whatever she’s done… whatever evil she committed toward me… she’s
still a good and loving mother to that child.  I don’t want to save
her
life;
I just don’t want to destroy
his
.”

“I’ll have her picked
up and brought into the station tomorrow morning.  I’ll see what she knows and
then decide if it’s worth a deal to us,” he offered.  Seeing the mutinous glint
in Honor’s eyes, he sighed.  “That’s the best I can do for now, Honor.  She
broke the law.  Not only that, but because of her inaction, the woman I love
got hurt and nearly died.”

“Technically, it
wasn’t her fault I was hurt.  That was on Tanner and Angie,” Honor pointed out.

“When we pulled you out
of that fucking hole in the ground, you’d nearly lost two thirds your blood
volume. If Sherry had just opened her mouth… hell, even made an anonymous tip,
we could have found you sooner and maybe….”

“Maybe what, Zeke? 
I’d still have been gang-raped.  I’d still have been stabbed.  I’d still have
been traumatized.  You can go back and woulda, coulda, shoulda yourself to
death, but what happened is done.  It can’t be changed.”

“I want them all to
pay.  I want every single one of them to hurt for what they did to you,” Zeke
replied harshly.

Reaching out to touch
his face, Honor shook her head.  “Stop.  Stop doing this to yourself.  I’m here
now.  I survived.  I made it, and you made me yours.  Concentrate on that for
tonight.  Tomorrow, we’ll see what Sherry remembers.”

“We?” he echoed.

“Yes, we,” Honor
reiterated firmly.  “I think I’ve earned the right to be a part of this
conversation, don’t you?”

“Baby…”

“Zeke, you have to
give me this.  She owes me these answers a hell of a lot more than she owes
them to you.”

Zeke conceded. 
“You’re right.  You can be in the room, but I do the questioning.”

“Deal,” Honor
agreed. 

“And after that, I
want you to get your butt over for an emergency session with Bree.  I know you
seem to be handling this, but I don’t want anything to hamper your progress. 
You’ve come so far, Honor.  I won’t let anybody push you back down the rabbit
hole.”

“I’ll call her cell
when we get home and ask her to fit me into her schedule,” Honor replied.  She
wasn’t going to fight something she knew she needed.  If Bree could help her
work through this terror she felt down to the marrow of her bones, she was
going to take advantage of the help.  “Now, can we please go home?  I need to
be someplace I feel safe, and right now, that isn’t here.”  And that pissed her
off no end.  The café was her fortress of solitude, and this asshole had just
waltzed in and corrupted it with his filth.  She wasn’t sure how exactly she’d
get past those feelings, but she knew she’d have help to do it, she thought as
she took Zeke’s hand and helped her to her feet. 

“Do you want to call
your sisters and aunt… tell them that you’re okay?” Zeke asked as he walked to
the television and pushed the button to extract the DVD.

“I’ll talk to
Patience on the way out.  She’ll do that for us.  Do you need to call Jake?”
Honor asked, watching as Zeke carefully slid the DVD into a plastic evidence
bag along with the post-it note that had been attached to it.

“I’ll talk to Diego
on the way out.  He can go over and talk to Jake in person,” Zeke replied.

“You sure you don’t
want to go do it?” Honor questioned as she began to pick up the things she’d
thrown at the television in her hysteria.  Glancing at the TV now, she shook
her head.  It was clear by the deep cracks in it that they’d have to purchase a
new one. 

“My place is with
you,” Zeke replied.  “Especially tonight.  If Jake has any questions for me
after Diego briefs him, he can call tomorrow.  Tonight is for us,” Zeke stated
softly, wrapping his arm around Honor’s waist as he guided her toward the door.

Looking up at him as
Zeke paused to pick up his Stetson from the chair where he’d discarded it when
he burst through the door, Honor was struck by how much she loved this man. 
“Zeke?”

“Hmmm,” he hummed,
raising his hat and settling it on his head.

“You know, I think I
really believe that I’m healing now.  You know… from what those men did to
me…,” she said softly.

Blinking, he stared
at her.  “Yeah?  What makes you say that, baby?” he asked as he reached for
her, curling her into his arms.

“Because, even after
seeing myself like I was then… watching them… you know,” she murmured, dropping
her eyes.  “Even after seeing it, all I wanted in the world was you.  I just
wanted your arms around me.  I knew once I got that… once I got to you… in your
arms, I’d be okay.  I just had to make it until you got here.”

Bending his head to
touch his lips lightly to hers, he murmured, “You know I’ll always come for
you, Honor.  Always.”

“I know,” Honor said
simply.  “You love me.”

“I do,” Zeke
confirmed.  “With every single breath I take, Kitten.”

“I know that, too. 
Because it’s the same way I love you.”

August 19, 2016 –
The McKinnon House

2:45 am

Honor

“No, please. 
Please stop!  Somebody, help!  Help me!” Honor begged, straining against the
unforgiving hands pinning her down.

“Stay still,
Peach, ain’t nobody comin’ for you,” a smooth voice hissed against her cheek as
another man laughed at her pain.

“Say meow, Kitty,
Kitty,” another deep voice growled against her ear. “C’mon, say it!  SAY! IT”
he roared.

“I’m sorry!  I
didn’t want to do it!  Don’t cry.  Please stop crying,” a third voice whimpered
from somewhere close.

“Shut the fuck up,
puta,” a fourth voice snarled.  “Shut up and take that cock like a fuckin’ cunt
should!”

“Fuck yeah, give
it to her, man.  Teach that bitch how a real woman takes it,” another chilling
voice cheered as pain ripped through her belly as the man behind her thrust
deeper, shoving her body into the cracked dirt.

“Oh, God, just
kill me,” she begged as whoever currently hurt her roughly withdrew from her
used body and flipped her on to her back.

“Not quite yet,
Little Kitty,” the one she’d come to know as the harshest of the men hurting
her snarled as he gripped her throat, squeezing it until she began to see
stars.  “Not just yet.  I haven’t heard you purr yet,” he continued before
biting her shoulder violently.

“Please!  End
this!  Kill me,” she screamed a split second before she felt the searing thrust
of a knife slide into her belly. 

“Honor, baby, wake
up!” she heard someone shouting.  “You’re safe, Kitten.  It’s a dream.  Open
your eyes!”

Sweating and shaking,
Honor’s shrill scream echoed in the darkened bedroom as she jerked upright in
bed, her hands raised in front of her to defend herself against her invisible
attackers.  “Oh, God,” she gasped, pushing a sweaty hank of hair off her face
before running a trembling hand down her throat.  “Zeke?” she whimpered as she
felt him shifting in the bed, fumbling for the lamp on his side of the bed.

“I’m here, Kitten,”
she heard his rich voice soothe deeply.   “You aren’t alone.  I’m just huntin’
the damn light switch on this lamp,” he grunted through the darkness as she
heard his hand searching for the switch. 

“We need to invest in
one of the clapper things we saw on TV.  Especially if I’m gonna wake us like
this every night,” she muttered, still straining to pull air into her lungs.

“Definitely something
to think about,” she heard Zeke mumble a second before he located the little
button on the base of the lamp.  “Ah ha! Found it!” he announced as light
suddenly flooded the previously blackened bedroom.

Blinking as the glow
of the lamp brightened the room, Honor was relieved when the elephant that had
been sitting on her chest found a better place to go.  Turning her head toward
Zeke, her heart skipped a beat when she saw the three dark red welts on his
neck.  “No,” she moaned, her hand automatically lifting to brush her fingertips
lightly over the claw marks she knew she was responsible for putting there. 
“Zeke, I’m so…”

“Baby, if you
apologize, you and I are gonna have a problem,” Zeke cut her off abruptly with
a shake of his head.

“I hurt you. 
Again.”  Hanging her head in shame, she dropped her hand from his injured
skin. 

“Bullshit.  I didn’t
even feel it,” he growled, putting a finger under her chin and lifting her
head.  “Don’t you ever bow your head like a beaten dog.  You keep that chin
up.  You’ve got nothing to be ashamed or sorry for.  It was an accident, and
I’m a big boy.”

“I can’t keep doing
stuff like this to you,” she denied, shaking her head as she tossed the covers
back and made to get out of bed.  God, she couldn’t believe she’d struck out at
him
again.
  That was three times in the last two weeks.  So far, she’d
given him a black eye, a split lip, and now a scratched up neck.  People were
going to start thinking he was in an abusive relationship at this rate. 
Throwing her legs over the side of the bed, she murmured, “Maybe we should
sleep separately until I get a handle on these nightmares.”

Catching her by the
back of her nightgown, Zeke pulled her back in bed when she would have made a
break for it.  Looking at him over her shoulder when her butt landed back on
the bed, she could see the thunderclouds gathering in his eyes and immediately
knew she’d ticked her future husband off and mentally kicked herself for it. 
It’s not like she wanted to leave him.  She didn’t.  Far from it.  She loved
going to bed in his arms at night and waking up being held by him in the
mornings.  It was these stupid nightmares in the middle of the night that were
spoiling things for them.  “Don’t be angry at me,” she said a little
defensively.  “I’m just trying to do what’s best for you.  You can’t keep
walking around the station looking like I’m beating the tar out of you,
Ezekiel.  People are gonna start gossiping.”

“To hell with the
busybodies with nothing better to do than stir up shit, Honor.  I’ll be damned
after six years of being so in love with you that I couldn’t see straight that
I’ll give up the joy of having you in my arms for a single second let alone a
whole night.  Screw that.  Your place is by my side. 
Always
.  I don’t
give a shit if you give me two black eyes and a fat lip every night of our
lives from now until the Almighty calls me home.  We sleep together.  End of
damn story.”

Honor’s lips twitched
at the disgruntled expression on his face.  “Now, honey…”

“No,” he denied
flatly, shaking his head.  “Don’t ‘Now, honey’ me.  Being sweet isn’t going to
get you your way.  Not about this.  Give you anything you wanted, Honor. 
Believe that.  But I won’t do anything that puts distance between us. 
Especially now.  We’re not going backwards, baby.  We struggle through this
shit
together
.  If things get hard, we fight harder.  That’s just how
it’s gotta be.  Otherwise, I run the risk of losing you to the memories and I
won’t do that.  Lost enough time with the woman I love.  Won’t lose any more. 
We’ve both lost e-fuckin-nough.”

Honor looked into
Zeke’s determined eyes for a long minute.  Lord, if their kids were even a
tenth as stubborn as their daddy proved he could be on a regular basis, she was
doomed to a life filled of constant battles and bargains.  “You’re very lucky
that I happen to agree with the spirit of what you’re saying because, you’re
right; we
have
both lost enough.  Otherwise, we’d probably be having a
discussion about the highhanded decrees that you’ve been making.  Fortunately
for you, however, I don’t want to let those bastards that already stole so much
take another moment from either of us.  That includes the moments I spend
sleeping at your side.  But I don’t want to keep striking out at you.  I
can’t,” she said softly, eying his neck.  Thankfully, she hadn’t drawn blood,
but the scratches still looked red and inflamed.  “Seeing those marks on you…
those marks that
I
put there…it hurts my heart, Zeke.”

The harsh set of
Zeke’s face softened marginally at her heartfelt confession.  Sighing, he
reclined in bed, propping himself up on a pile of pillows and straightening his
legs and patting his chest.  “Alright, Kitten, assume the position,” he
ordered, holding his arms out at his side as he arched one brow at her and
waited.

“Zeke, crawling in
your lap…”

“Crawling in my lap
and assuming the position will make us
both
feel a hell of a lot better
while we have this talk.  Now, c’mon.  Haul that gorgeous ass over here,” he
demanded, unaffected by the irritated sound she made in her throat.

She stared at the man
she’d fallen in love as his dark eyes challenged her to argue with him.  “I
swear, you’re like a dog with a bone when you want something,” she grumbled
under her breath as she conceded defeat and began to clamber across the
mattress to him on her hands and knees.  She might as well give in; she
probably had about three more seconds at best before he was done waiting for
her to move and simply picked her up and put her on his lap where he wanted
her.  It certainly wouldn’t be the first time he resorted to caveman tactics
since they’d gotten engaged.

“I’ve learned that
tenacity pays with you,” he returned with a grin as she yanked her gown up to
her waist so she could throw her leg over his body and straddle his waist with
one trim leg on either side of him.”

“There!  Happy now?”
she snapped when she got settled on top of him, his arms securely wrapped
around her middle as her face found it’s favorite spot nestled between his
shoulder and neck.

“Gettin’ there,” Zeke
muttered as he slid his hand underneath her long heavy mane of hair to slide
around the nape of her neck and squeeze lightly.  “I love you, Honor.”

The last of her
tension slipped away as she heard him, his low spoken words more of a vow than
a statement.  “I love you, too.  That’s why I don’t want to hurt you.  Admit it
though, if you woke up and found you’d scratched and bruised me up, you’d want
to do something to stop it from happening, too.”

“Probably, but I’ve
got over a hundred pounds on you.  The damage I could potentially do to you is
a hell of a lot greater than what you could ever do to me on your worst night. 
I get where you’re coming from, though.  That said, there’s still no way in
hell we’re sleeping apart.”

“You’re hopeless,”
Honor mumbled, rubbing her nose against the warm skin of his neck before
pressing her lips to his thumping pulse.  “But I suppose that’s one of the
reasons I love you.  You believe in lost causes.”

“Words like that are
gonna piss me off,” he warned with a low growl.  “If you’re gonna talk shit,
I’m gonna insist you put that mouth of yours to better use.  Kiss me, baby.”

Honor chuckled,
lifting her head.  “Sorry,” she replied quietly, pressing her lips to his and
exchanging a chaste kiss with him.

Breaking the
connection between their lips after a second, Zeke met her eyes.  “You wanna
talk about your nightmare?”

“Not much to say. 
You probably heard it all,” she murmured with a frown. 

“It was a hell of lot
worse tonight.  I guess that’s to be expected after what you had to see last
night, but I still hate it.”

“Me, too,” Honor
whispered, sighing as his hand slid beneath her silky nightshirt to stroke her
back, his fingertips digging into the knotted muscles.

“This okay?” he
asked.  She could tell he was trying to keep his touch light, almost
impersonal.

And she didn’t like
that.

Not one bit.

Pushing against his
chest, she rose slightly so that she could look him in the eye.  “I’m not
afraid of you, Zeke.  I know who’s holding me right now.  You don’t have to be
afraid to touch me.”

“I just don’t want to
scare you, Honor.  Doing something that frightens you is the stuff
my
nightmares are made of.”

“I love your hands on
me, Zeke.  Even before I could admit I was yours, your touch offered me
comfort,” she confided in a soft voice, her face coloring at her bold
admission.  Once upon a time, she’d never have had the courage to say a thing
like that, but being with him had given her a strength she hadn’t known she
possessed.  And he needed to know that his touch… the sure, confident stroke of
his hands on her body; it was something she craved. 

Zeke’s hands firmed
on her back.  “Good,” he replied with a satisfied look.  “Then you won’t mind
if we get rid of this gown.”

Honor shook her head
and chuckled when he quickly gripped the bottom of her nightshirt and pulled it
up, sweeping it over her head. 

“Fuck, that’s
better,” Zeke sighed, his eyes heating as he stared at her bared breasts. 
Cupping one firm globe in his hand, he met her own aroused gaze. “You’re sure
this is okay?” he asked, his voice growing gravelly as she watched him lick his
lips.

Still wearing a pair
of satiny panties, Honor nodded, grinding her core against his groin as his
talented hands worked their magic.  “Oh, yes,” she consented breathily as his
thumbs worried her hardening nipples while her body became more plaint beneath
his touch.  Moaning when one hand drifted down her body to cup her through her
panties, her eyelids fluttered as she squirmed on top of him.  “Zeke, that
feels so good,” she praised as she wriggled on top of him again, her panties
dampening as she  rubbed her mound over the erection straining against his
black silk boxers.  Rolling her hips against his hardness, she couldn’t help
her impish grin when she pulled a deep groan from his mouth.  Leaning forward
until her lips grazed his and the hard tips of her breasts met the hot skin of
his bare chest, she hummed against his mouth.  “Make love to me, Zeke.”

Dropping a hand to
grip one hip, stilling her gyrating hips, Zeke pressed his head back against
the pillows.  “Baby, I want to.  God
knows
, I want nothing more than to
peel those panties off and bury myself in that tight heat of yours, but are you
sure you’re up for that?  You had a hell of a night, and I don’t know if you
can handle…”