Manage Me (Toven's Circus #1) (19 page)

“Ahhh…I am so excited to meet you, Nell! I'm Rook, Jaden’s brother’s wife, Keesha” She exclaims tugging me back and checking out my outfit. “I love this outfit, you’re Baby!”

“I know, that’s what I thought, too, just please don’t put me in the corner!” I say and we both burst into a fit of giggles, hugging again, then linking arms taking our seats, instantly bonding over out love of the movie Dirty Dancing. While the rest of our section looks at use like we are nuts.

Elle makes it into her spot next to me, Jaden stands across from me with a goofy grin on his face, I give him a questioning look but he just winks and takes a seat across from me. I reach out my foot and knock his knee with the toe of my shoe but before  I can pull away, I feel is hands slip around my ankle, running his thumbs along the smooth skin, sending tingles and chills up my leg.

After our orders are placed, Jaden looks at me with a grin and addresses Elle, “Mom, I think now is a good time to tell Nell the story of how you and Dad met.” 

Elle beams at Nate, who reaches over covering her hand with his own, as they share a look filled with love. “Nate was in the military when I met him.” She starts but Rook cuts in.

“It was fleet week.” He grins and Jaden smacks him.

“Yes, it was fleet week in New York City. I was in school at NYU, getting my bachelor’s degree in psychology. It was my 4
th
year in the city and I had never gone out to Fleet Week before, in fact I wasn’t much of a partier at all but my best friend Maggie, convinced me to go out that night. In a smoke filled jazz bar on the corner of 7
th
avenue and 10
th
street, I sat listening to the music and nursing a Guinness. Maggie had drawn the attention of a sweet sailor named Benny but up to that point no one had caught my interest.

“Then the door opened and my heart rate accelerated, my body began to tingle and I looked over my shoulder. There he stood, tall and proud in his dress whites. His mossy green eyes met mine and it was like a bolt of lightning passed between us. He headed straight for me, his eyes focused and locked on mine the entire time. And do you want to know what he said?” She asks finally looking away from Nate and grabbing my hands. I am so wrapped up in her story, I just nod. “He said ‘There you are, I’ve been looking my whole life for you.’ And thank goodness it wasn’t just a line to get him laid because I was putty in his big hands. I have been every day since then.

“We got married at the end of the week before they left and it was another three months before we saw each other again. But the feelings were just as strong three months later, as they were that first night, and even stronger today.” She finishes turning back to Nate meeting his lips for a sweet kiss. I don’t even realize the tears running down my face until Jaden squeezes my calf under the table.

Leaning forward, “Are you okay, Beauty?” he asks and I nod quickly as his mother turns back.

“Oh Sweets, don’t you cry.” She says bundling me into her arms.

“I’m okay really, it’s just a very beautiful story, and the love you share is wonderful. I have never seen anything like it outside of books.”

“Well my girl, you better get prepared for love because James men are full of it.” She chuckles letting me go and kissing me on the cheek. Warmth spreads through my chest for her, and I can see why her family all love her so much.

Throughout dinner, we talk, share, and laugh. They all share stories about Jaden and the rest of the band. The trouble and fun times they had when they were little and then into the passion they all shared for music and the band. They all care about one another deeply and it is wonderful to watch the love flow around the room, cracking open a part of my heart that I have always tried so hard to keep buried deep. This amazing unit of individuals that accepts and love each other unconditionally. They are the family that you see at the end of the movie coming together smiling and laughing, no matter what it was that they just went through. This is the family that I always wished was mine.

Warm, accepting, and above all loving. There is no guilt, belittlement, or manipulation being used against one another. No cold shoulders, just an outpouring of love. But despite my efforts, I feel the need to escape. Escape the perfectness that surrounds me so I can breathe a minute. I excuse myself from the table, avoiding eye contact with Jaden, and make my way through the restaurant for the ladies room.

Once inside I quickly check to make sure that I am alone, before slouching against the sink to fight the tears that threaten to escape. Jaden wants that someday. Seeing him radiating happiness while in their presence just confirms that, not only was I wrong about him, but that he truly desires that same life in his future. But is he right about me? I grew up wishing and dreaming of the kind of love he is offering but I have spent so long without it, it’s making me question everything. And what if I am just like my mother deep down? I love my career with a deep seeded passion and would hate to give it up. If I was forced to leave my dreams behind, would I regret it? Would I grow to resent Jaden or any future children we could have some day?

I stand there ponder all of this until a knock sounds on the bathroom door, it slowly opens, and Jaden poking his head in.

“Is it safe?” He whispers and enters when I nod.

“I will be right out. You didn’t have to check on me.” I say turning around to the sink to wash my hands. He comes up behind me, wrapping his long warm arms around my waist, and catching my eyes in the mirror.

“Tell me what’s wrong, Beauty.” He demands nuzzling him nose into my hair to lay his lips on the sensitive spot right behind my ear. I lean into him accepting the comfort he’s offering.

“I just needed a minute,” I say casting my eyes down. Instead of pushing the issue he stands there holding me close, silently supporting me. He lays soft kisses on my temple and my gaze flicks up to meet his. Happiness mixed with love shine in his eyes.

“They all really like you.”

“I like them, too.” My voice only cracking slightly but it’s enough for him to catch. 

“Nell, they accept you because I care about you but they will love you because you are just that easy to love. I’m pretty sure Mom is almost as in love with you as I am.” And I giggle because I hope so. Rubbing his hands along my arms, and regardless of the overwhelming sadness, his touch still sends soft tingles through me, pushing it all aside because he makes me happy.

“You’re so lucky to have them, Jaden.”

“Apparently, I am just a very lucky guy and most of all because I have you.” He says full of cheek, causing me to smile up at him, and shake my head. Wanting to push way the loneliness for good, I shift my hips skillfully back across the front of him. He sucks in a breath and I send him my own cocky smirk in the mirror. Desire flares in his green eyes, changing them to more of a deep forest green color of desire, a grumble of need rumbles in his chest, and he swiftly runs the tips of his wet tongue across his bottom lip.

He slides his hands to my hips and around to my flat belly before running them up my sides, along my ribcage, just barely brushing the up my breasts, and over their tightened peaks. He nudges me forwards so I drop my hands on the counter bending forward at the waist. He rubs his growing length against the crease of my ass.

“Would you let me fuck you in this bathroom, Beauty? You would have to be quiet, could you do that? Let me fill every part of you. Push my cock deep inside over and over until you cum all over me.” His desire for me bombards me straight to my apex and I node my head and letting out a soft moan as he shifts, running has hand up the back of my leg, bunching up the long skirt, baring my unadorned ass. Jaden sucks in a breath through his teeth when he feels that I don’t have any panties on.

“Jesus fuck, it’s a good thing I didn’t know about this before now. I would have walked into dinner with a full chub, completely unable to talk, and fantasizing about demolishing this sugary cunt.” He says running a lone finger through my weeping core, wetting my inflamed lips, and just lightly coating the little nub of nerves. The tip of his finger starts to enter me, when there is a thump on the door followed by a knock. Jaden steps back and I stand straight fixing my skirt. He sends me a fast smirk then flips the lock on the door, pulling it open.

“Oh, I am sorry! How did this get locked!? Weird, huh?” He sends the teenage girl a blinding smile, nearly hypnotizing the poor thing. With her eyes wide she scurries away without a word. With one last grin he saunters back out; leaving me a hot and horny mess. I quickly fluff my hair and check my face. Besides the soft pink of my cheeks and my slightly increased breath, I look fine. I double check the back of my dress, making sure my ass isn’t hanging out, and head back to the table. 

Chapter 28

Jaden

Our group ends up staying until the restaurant closes. None of us wanting the evening to end. As we are all saying our good-byes, my mother grabs me up in her arms,

“Baby, she is wonderful. Don’t let her go. She needs to be loved like you can love her.” She whispers and I just nod. I have every intention of hanging on to Nell with every bit of strength that I have.

Seeing Nell fit so perfectly into my family just reaffirms what I already knew, that she was it for me. Now just to get her on the same page. I could see in her eyes that she was falling for me but she was scared of something. I really shouldn’t be in such a hurry, we have time. She is stuck with me for the next three months, I have all that time to get her to realize that she is crazy in love with me and never wants to be without me. Because I know I don’t even want to live a moment without her. But seeing her other gift sitting on the kitchen table when we get back to the bus, I know I don’t have it in me to keep my mouth shut.

I quickly snatch the gift bag off of the table before she sees it, then grab her hand to lead her outside.

“I thought we were
going to bed
.” She says and I can’t help but laugh.

“Are you that spoiled on my cock already, Beauty? That I can’t even take you for a nice romantic stroll along the river because you would rather be riding me hard in the bedroom?” I tease wandering out from where the buses are parked heading to the area surrounding the Rose Quarter and the landing that looks out over the river.

“We’ll head back and I’ll give you some deep dicking soon. But first, I have something else for you. Close your eyes and put both hands out.” With a huge smile on her face she does as she is told. I take the small blue gift bag and set it on her waiting palms. “Open.”

When she bites her bottom lip in excitement before opening her glorious icy blue eyes, I let out a small groan, I’d much rather ravish her right here. She gasps as her eyes meet the bag and she bounces on her toes.

“Eee! Tiffany’s!” jumping excitedly from one spiked heel to the other. The air around us expands with her excitement, she’s like a little kid at Christmas, even shaking the bag lightly before diving in. She rips out the tissue and pulls out the long matching blue box. A metal rattle comes from inside but it doesn’t tell her much. Once all the layers are broken away, she reaches the box containing the present. Popping the lid she expels a gasp, her eyes going wide.

“Oh Jaden they are stunning, you really shouldn’t have!” she gushes, pulling the long necklace with three keys out. Each key is made from a different metal and has different designs and gemstones. One is white gold with a snowflake incrusted in diamonds on top, another is yellow gold with a heart incrusted in pink sapphires, and the last one is rose gold with a simple circle on top incrusted in emeralds. She looks at me like no one ever has before, tears and love filling every corner. I reach out to grasp her face in my hands.

“Each key represents something special, just to us,” I pick up the white gold one, “from the second I saw your hair and eyes, they have reminded me of snow and ice but despite the coldness of their appearance, you are the warmest, sweetest person I have ever met. Your heat pulls me in and has become my addiction,” I whisper softly, twirling a strain of her hair around my index finger, “The yellow gold one is for the mysterious key that only you possess, that allows you access behind the walls around my heart.” Tears well up in her eyes slowly spilling over. I kiss them away before grabbing the last key. “This one has something even more special, look here,” I flip the key over showing her the engraving along the stem that reads “Meine Unsterbliche Geliebte” in German.