Marked by Death (The Godhunter, Book 4) (12 page)

What do you mean?
He actually took the time to look down at me, disregarding the woman who came up to stand before him. She looked even more confused than the last guy, since she couldn’t even hear our conversation, so it must’ve just looked like we were staring rather hard at each other.

You and I both know that this whole concept is created by Atlanteans,
I couldn’t believe he looked so shocked.
Come on, I know you’re all from Atlantis. Your advances in science and magic made you gods, not any divine birthright. People expected an afterlife so you’re giving it to them, when actually, they could pass on just fine without you.

Are you that blind?
He shook his head.
Yes, we were from Atlantis but if you know that, then you should also know how taking power from human sacrifice has in turn bound us to humans and forced us to conform. Human belief created Aaru, not us. Just as human belief turned me into this.

I knew there were restrictions to temper the power, Blue had shown me that, but Blue hadn't been bitter about it. Most gods found the fact that they were partially changed by human belief, to be a minor price to pay for the amount of power they received. I'd never met a god who felt enslaved by it. Yet it seemed that it was exactly what Anubis was feeling.

For the first time, I was seeing the man inside the god. Anubis was tired of death! I reached into his mind, pressing into him as he’d done to me, and what I found was even more disturbing. Honor, great troves of the stuff. He lived in the Underworld, serving humans as Death, not because he was attracted to it but because the duty had been placed upon him. When the god designations had been handed out, he’d been given the short end of the stick. Sure, Death was probably one of the most awesome powers, but it also seemed to demand a hell of a payback, if you'll excuse the pun.

I sucked in my breath when I felt his loneliness, his withdrawal from the other deities that reigned beside him. None of them understood his desire to see life, to be immersed in light instead of death and darkness. Go figure. Death craved life, longed for it like a thirsty man dreamed of water, constantly and tortuously.

“Fuck,” I whispered out loud and the woman before him tried her best not to notice.

“
What?” Anubis looked a little spooked.

He knew how far I’d just reached into his mind, and I was shocked to realize that he hadn’t meant to allow it. He didn’t want me to see the reality because he saw it as a weakness. So it seemed that even his power over me had its price. He may control my body and be able to search my mind, but I could use that connection to do a little searching of my own. It wasn't too surprising, I'd experienced something similar with Blue.

“Damn it,” I shook my head and looked away. “I can’t like you. I don’t
want
to like you.”

Something eased in the air between us, and he turned away from me with a smile. The woman stepped up and he went about his job, looking way too serene for my tastes. As the people were judged, I sat and thought over what I’d seen in him. A man with that much honor wouldn’t do what he did to me without good reason. The really confusing thing was, I sensed no vengeance in him toward me. I didn’t know if that meant he’d worked out his issues in the night or if he’d never been mad at me to begin with, but if he hadn’t brought me there for vengeance, then what?

He couldn’t have brought me there just to get some female companionship. I mean, torturing and humiliating me were a bit extreme, if that were the case. It went way beyond pulling pigtails. The man I felt inside Anubis wouldn’t do that, so why then?

He must have been genuinely affronted that a human had dared attack a god… bad enough that other deities had attacked him but a human? That must have pushed him over the edge and his honor out the window. Or maybe the thought of a human, someone he'd traded his freedom to serve, attacking him was just plain enraging. It must have seemed like such a betrayal to him.

What was I doing, rationalizing his treatment of me? That was sick but on a deeper level, I realized why I was doing it. If Anubis really was a good guy at heart, he could be appealed to. He would understand that he shouldn't hold me forever, when it would result in another man’s death. So I continued to work through Anubis’ issues in my head and I continued to hope that maybe he wasn't as bad as I'd thought. Maybe he’d let me go.

“
You’re unworthy,” Anubis’ voice took on a sharp edge, not the razor edge of steel but the glass-like edge of slivered obsidian. That edge was so sharp, it could cut you without you even noticing it. You’d bleed to death before you felt the pain.

The man standing before Anubis started to shake. He didn’t scream but I could tell he wanted to. The only sounds in the chamber were the scribbling of Thoth’s pen and my rapid breaths. Ma’at remained calm, Anubis remained calm, I however, started to whimper when Ammut shuffled forward.

When she came into range, Anubis threw the heart to her. I bizarrely took notice that Ammut was a female, when she leaped to catch the twitching piece of flesh, although who knows, I’ve never checked out a hippo before, maybe they hid the goods well. Female or not, she loved hearts, and the delighted sounds of her chomping down on her snack, nearly made me lose the contents of my stomach.

The man before Anubis simply shimmered away, his mouth open in a silent scream, as Ammut swallowed his heart down. I would have screamed then too, if Anubis hadn’t expressly forbade my vocal chords from working. So instead, I curled up against his knee, wrapping myself around his leg, and hid my face in the folds of his pants. I don't know why I did it, strong Godhunter that I was(yeah, whatever), but it was automatic. I guess it's human nature to reach for comfort when we're scared.

Miracle of miracles, surprise upon surprise, curiouser and curiouser, Anubis actually reached down and started stroking my hair soothingly. He also sent out warm and calming waves of energy to me. I felt my muscles relax, my heart slow, as he reassured me without words that this was the proper way of things, that a soul would have to be evil for it to be weighed unworthy and fed to Ammut.

I swallowed hard and sat back, reminding myself of who I was, and why Godhunters didn’t cringe before gods. I was also Rouva to the Froekn, and Tima of the Intare. I did
not
cower, especially not toward a god who was playing the part of my jailor. Well, at least it made me feel better to think that.

Four hours later, it was finally done and I was much more sympathetic towards Anubis than I wanted to be. I was a little shaky despite my inner bolstering and his calming influence. Anubis, of course, was fine. He’d been judging souls for centuries. It was an average day for him. It was going to become average for me as well, if he had his way.

My stomach shifted at the thought and Anubis sent me a concerned look. Concerned? When had he become concerned about me? I was concerned, concerned about whether I’d ever see Trevor again and concerned over the fact that I was falling in like with the man who’d taken me away from him. Man, I always knew I had issues, especially when it came to men, but this took the cake.

He got to his feet, unfastening the chain from the throne, and helped me to mine.

“Let’s take a walk in my gardens,” he offered me his hand, hooking my chain into his belt.

“
If you like,” I took his hand and eyed him warily.

“
I’m asking,” he took a breath and let it out slowly. “So it’s if
you
like.”

I saw Ma’at’s intrigued expression from the side of my vision. When I looked directly at her though, she’d composed it into polite interest. Thoth however, wasn’t anywhere near polite. He glared at me like I was Delilah, holding a bright shiny pair of scissors. I glared back. I hadn't asked to be there. I didn’t want to be there. Even if I was seducing Anubis, it would only be fair, a captive’s chance for escape.

Was I seducing him?

“
Well?” Anubis was still waiting.

“
I’d love to see your gardens,” I shot Thoth a challenging look and leaned further into Anubis. “Thank you for asking.”

Anubis led me down the corridor that led to the dining room but we continued on past it and out a door at the end. Bright sunlight blinded me for a moment and I raised my hand to shade my eyes. When my eyes adjusted, I had my first look at Anubis’ world.

Egyptian gardens should be full of palm trees and lotus blossoms. Maybe some reeds along a riverbank and herons tromping around looking for fish. Oh and don’t forget the scarabs, lots of dung beetles rolling around their little balls of… okay scratch that, maybe a nice water feature instead. Anubis’ Egyptian garden might have been all that but darker, maybe under a constant twilight sky with flowers glowing white.

It wasn’t.

I gasped at the neat paths laid out before me in a proper square, with curved lines dissecting it. It was a garden fit for a King, a French King. I imagined that Marie Antoinette walked paths similar to the ones Anubis started to lead me through. I almost heard her childish laughter on the breeze… who knows, her little, happy, cake-eating self could very well have been there. Though it’s hard to eat cake without a head.

“
Anubis,” I felt a small smile settle on my lips, “it’s beautiful.”

He looked ecstatic, his chest even puffed out a little further, and I shook my head at the complete turnaround in his personality. Maybe there was hope.

The meticulously trimmed hedges were interspersed with blooming flower beds and the scent of roses was thick, mixing with jasmine and lilacs. There was a tall stone wall defining the large patch of land, the length of which disappeared down the sides of the palace, where smaller gardens reached like a lover's embrace. The wall was topped with lacy iron work, so I was unable to see exactly how far Anubis’ land extended. I was a little disappointed by that but it was the only thing disappointing about the garden.

We walked slowly, enjoying the sights and scents as well as the warmth of the sun directly overhead. At the end of the manicured square, steps led down into yet another garden and beyond that was a hedge maze. In front of the entrance to the maze was a gazing pool, in the center of which was a statue of a peacock in white marble. The head was held high and regal, the tail feathers relaxed and flowing down into the pool. The water in the pool was mottled with sunlight and the shade of overhanging pomegranate trees.

“A peacock,” I let go of his arm to move forward and when I reached the end of the chain, I pulled on it to urge him forward as well.

He looked down at the taut chain between us, a small frown marring his forehead before it smoothed away, and then he came forward to stand beside me. I felt the weight of what I’d done unconsciously and knew immediately why his coming to me had been momentous. As a witch, I should have realized it sooner, for as you bind, so are you bound.

The tether worked both ways.

“
Why a peacock?” I kept my voice light, so I wouldn’t betray the world of possibilities that had just been exposed to me. The symbolism of the chain tying him to me, as much as me to him, was mind blowing but more important was the question of who would be holding the end of power when this game played out.

“
The Chinese believe the peacock represents divinity, power, and beauty.” He focused on the statue but I sensed his attention was actually on me.

“
They’re also the symbol of fidelity,” I pretended to study the statue as well but I was really judging his reaction out of the corner of my eye. “Did you know they mate for life… just like wolves?”

“
Really?” His voice said cool interest but his body tensed.

“
Yes,” it suddenly occurred to me that I wouldn’t get a better opportunity than this. “If their mate dies, or is otherwise lost to them, they either never mate again or they die of a broken heart.”

“
Not like wolves,” he turned to face me and when I turned to him, I found his eyes swirling with colors… all of them.

“
No,” I spoke softly, like any loud noise might spook him. “Not like wolves… like werewolves.”

“
Just say it, Vervain,” his lips thinned and a muscle twitched in his jaw.

“
You know what I’m saying,” I lost all pretense. “Trevor will die if you keep me here. Maybe that will suit you just fine but I don’t think so. You wanted to punish me because you found it offensive that I, as a human, would presume to fight gods but Trevor is one of you, and killing him outside of a fair fight, is just not your style. You have more honor than that.”

“
Is that what you believe?”

“
It’s what I saw,” I backed up a little from the anger that was falling off him in droves, “when I looked inside you.”

“
Inside me,” he circled and backed me against the side of the pool. “I think you’ve got it backwards, Godhunter. It’s I who shall be inside you, and there’s nothing you or your mate can do to stop it.”

Before I could appeal to the honor I knew was there, he yanked me against him and covered my mouth with his. There was no passion, no flutterings of desire to distract me. His kiss was almost painful, all punishing pressure and savage teeth. When he finally pulled away, I felt bruised, bereft, and there was the slight tang of blood in my mouth.