Medieval Ever After (78 page)

Alex clenched his jaw and lowered his lips to her forehead so she could not see his eyes. “How many times, Maddie?” He held his breath, not sure what he was about to hear.

“Just one night, but four or five times. I do not remember for sure. But it hurt every time and I bled terribly from it. I am afraid, Alex.”

“Do you trust me, Maddie?” He ran his thumb across her cheek.

“Aye, I do.”

“Then trust me when I say we will not do anything until you are ready, lass.”

She was so beautiful. Her hair was a shambles, but she was as breathtaking as ever. How he longed to feel all of her glorious curves. He longed to trace his tongue over every inch of her body. Someday, he vowed. He believed that just below the surface was a passionate woman; he just needed to be patient.

He ran his knuckles over her cheek. After kissing her forehead, her nose, and her lips, he captured her face in his hands and lowered his mouth to hers. She tasted so sweet and welcoming. He wanted all of her, to possess her. Instead of pushing away, she opened her lips so he could sweep his tongue inside her sweet mouth. She touched her tongue to his briefly and that simple motion stole away what remained of his ability for reason.

***

Maddie wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in closer. She loved the feel of being in his arms. When Alex kissed her, warmth spread throughout her entire body. He ran his hand down the inside of her arm and she shivered as the fluttering sensation in her stomach reached to her core. She was confused by her feelings, unable to comprehend the changes going on inside her body. His hands dropped to her waist and she leaned toward him. She could hear his breathing increase, and her own heart beat faster. His hand swept down her back and across her waist before coming to rest on her thigh.

And then she bolted as if she had been burned. She jumped out of his lap and ran all the way to the far wall. Hiding her face toward the wall, she folded her arms protectively across her breasts. She tried to get her breathing under control, but to no avail. The memory of Niles Comming had ruined their perfect moment. Afraid of the look she would see in his eyes, she darted her gaze everywhere but at him. He was still seated in the chair.

She panted and coughed as her panic escalated.

“I am sorry, Alex. I just cannot do this.” She turned her back to the wall and stared at him. What was he thinking? He hadn’t moved from the chair. His arms were down, relaxed. A fine tremor rippled through her whole body. Even if he wasn’t going to beat her like Kenneth or Niles would have, he probably no longer wanted her. How could he want a wife who would push him or hit him whenever they became intimate? She squeezed her eyes shut again to try to erase the bad memories in her mind. When she opened her eyes, Alex was still sitting in the chair. He had not moved. His eyes searched hers.

“‘Tis all right, Maddie. I will wait until you are ready,” he said quietly.

“I do not understand. What do you mean?” she cried. “Ready for what?” She swiped at her tears.

“I will help you get past this. When you are ready, I want you to come back and sit with me. I will wait for as long as it takes. I will not touch you again until you desire my touch.”

She saw no anger in his face, no condemnation, just a serene sense of control. He turned his head and gazed at the fire burning in the hearth.

Maddie gulped. Was it possible? Was he truly this patient and calm? She glanced at him again, wanting to convince herself that he was not angry or disgusted. She smoothed her gown in place and played with her hair, trying to rearrange it. Her breathing slowly returned to normal. Perhaps he truly did wish to help her, to be there for her. She moved over to the window, folded the fur back, and peeked out over the moonlit fields. Several minutes passed.
I
can do this
.
I would much rather be in his arms than over here
by the window alone.
He did not hurt me
, she reminded herself. She turned enough to watch him over her shoulder. He still had not moved. Collecting her strength, she closed her eyes and turned to face him, willing herself to trust this man fully and without restraint.

She inched over to the hearth and stood in front of where he sat with his elbows resting on his knees. Leaning back in his chair, he studied her.

Her hands tugged at the folds of her gown, and the fire in the hearth warmed her back as she steeled her reserve.
I can do this
. She sighed as she realized how much she wanted this. A slow blush crept across her face as her eyes met his.

“I would like to come back now if you will still have me, Alex.” There was no threat in his eyes.

“Whenever you are ready, lass.” A soft smile crept across his face.

She eased over to him, and he reached up to her. She grasped his hand in hers and settled on his lap again, careful not to disturb his bandage.

“Am I hurting your leg, Alex?”

“Nay, lass, you are not hurting me. Your touch is as light as a feather. You will not hurt my leg.” He kissed her forehead and brushed back the soft tendrils of her hair. “You have to learn to trust me. I am not like those despicable men. I may get very loud with my bluster, but I will never raise a hand to you in anger. Can you believe me?”

Maddie’s nodded and offered him a tentative smile. In her heart, she knew it was true. She had known it for some time.

“What do you want, Maddie?”

She peered up at him through her lashes. “You, Alex, I want you.”

“Then I am yours. Touch me.” His eyes darkened, imploring her to move.

She touched his rough beard, then ran her thumb along his lower lip. The way he gazed at her immediately sent another wave of warmth through her body. “Touch me again, Alex. Please?” she whispered.

“I want you to try something, lass. Will you do something for me?” he asked.

She nodded her head.

“Do you trust me not to hurt you?”

She nodded again and chewed on her lower lip.

“Then close your eyes for me. I am going to touch you, and if you want me to stop, just ask me.”

She closed her eyes with determination and lifted her chin.

“Maddie, you are so precious to me, do you believe that?”

“Yes,” she whispered.

“Let me show you how precious you are to me. I am going to touch your ankle, but I will not hurt you.”

She nodded her head, still squeezing her eyes shut. Alex’s hand touched her ankle.

“I am going to move my hand up your leg a little.” He moved his fingers up to her calf and rubbed his hand lightly up and down her lower leg. “How does it feel? Does it feel nice? I want my touch to feel nice to you. Tell me how it feels.”

She let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding it. “It feels good, Alex. I like it,” she whispered as she wrapped her hands around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder.

She peeked up at him and caught his smile before closing her eyes again. “Good, lass. I am going to move my hand up. Do you still trust me?” He moved his hand up to her knee and caressed the sensitive skin behind it.

Maddie nodded again. She wiggled in his lap a little. Alex groaned but continued to caress her leg. Her breath came a little faster. “Yes, Alex, I like it when you touch me.”

He moved his hand up above her knee. “This is the last move I will make, Maddie. I am going a little higher. Do you still trust me?” His hand was nearly at the top of her thigh, but she did not move.

She nodded against his shoulder. His warm skin felt wonderful against hers, but she made a move to push his hand away out of embarrassment. At the last moment, she stopped herself. His hand caressed her leg back and forth, brushing over the top of her thigh. His thumb rubbed a path down the inside of her thigh. Her fingers dug into his shoulder, her eyes still closed.

“Alex,” she whispered. What was happening to her? Her belly was full of butterflies again. She kept her eyes closed, rejoicing in the sensation of his caresses. There was a burning at the juncture of her legs that she didn’t understand, but she did not want him to stop. She reflexively moved her thighs apart, then gasped when she realized what she had done. Her head jerked up as her eyes flew open in shame.

Alex ran his calloused thumb down her cheek and over her neck. “It’s all right, lass. People who are to be married touch each other. It is supposed to be wonderful. You are supposed to enjoy it. Relax.” He kissed her lightly on her lips, tugging her lip out before he ran his tongue over it.

“Touch me, lass. I want to feel your touch,” he whispered in her ear.

Maddie reached for the hard planes of his chest and ran her fingers down through his coarse hairs to his abdomen and back up again. She brushed his nipples lightly—which made her jump—but she did not hesitate before reaching down to touch him again. She liked the feel of his skin. A dark line trailed down his abdomen and disappeared inside his plaid.

“Precious, look at me,” Alex said.

She raised her eyes to gaze at him and saw the desire in his eyes. Blushing to her core, she realized how special she felt at this moment.

“This is how it should be between a husband and wife, Maddie. Touching and caressing should feel wonderful. You should trust me not to hurt you. It is about giving pleasure and receiving pleasure. It is about wanting to take care of the person you care about.” He removed his hand from her leg and reached up to brush a lock of hair behind her ear. “We will do this together, sweeting. Do you believe me?”

“Yes.” She leaned forward and Alex took possession of her mouth. The kiss was demanding. He angled his mouth over hers, hungrily thrusting his tongue to mate with hers. He stopped abruptly, cradled her head in his hands, and leaned in and touched his forehead to hers, letting out his breath with a sigh.

Wrapping his hands around her waist, he set her apart from him before standing on his good leg. “And now, before you make me completely lose my wits, we must stop.” She stared at him with a dazed expression on her face.

“But we still have one more thing we need to decide, my lady,” he said as he helped her straighten her skirts and her hair. “We need to decide when our wedding will take place.”

“Oh, Alex, I need to make my dress and plan the feast. I don’t know how long that will take,” she explained.

“You are not going to make me wait too long, are you?” Alex’s eyebrows rose.

Maddie blushed when she glanced up at him. “I do not want to wait either,” she confessed.

“Alice and Brenna can help you with your dress and the planning, can they no’?”

“Certainly, they will. It is Brenna’s kitchen, my lord.”

“Soon to be yours,” he added with a smile.

Maddie scowled as she thought about it. She had not realized she would be assuming the position of mistress of the keep. “Oh, Alex, I hope Brenna won’t mind.”

“I think Brenna will be relieved. Mayhap we can think of Brenna getting betrothed. ‘Tis time for her, I think.” He paused in thought. “I think a fortnight should be enough time, don’t you?”

“Oh, my goodness, that is not much time! Perhaps I should get started.”

He pulled her back into an embrace. “Nay, Maddie, to bed with you. It has been a tiring day.” He kissed her briefly and opened the door. Brodie was asleep on the floor. They stepped over him so Alex could escort Maddie to her chamber. When they reached her door, she turned back to him and he ravished her mouth again.

She stepped inside with a blush and a smile, rubbing her fingers over her lips, remembering how good Alex tasted. For the first time in a long while, she found herself looking forward to what the future held in store.

RESCUED BY A HIGHLANDER