Melissa And The Cowboy (Western Night Series 1) (75 page)

It sounded sweet to her, the idea of a man so shy, but also lonely, that would reach out to her like this. Maybe she could grow to love him after all, maybe this would
n’
t be the mistake she feared that it would become.

And yet as thunder rumbled in the distance, she could not help but feel something in the pit of her stomach, something that felt like a warning, she tried her best to squash the feelings rising up inside of her, but suddenly she hoped that that storm would come, so she would have a little more time.

And if that time was spent with Kyle, all the better.

              Suddenly she felt a jolt, and a crack resounded through the air. The cart lurched, and she almost tipped out of it as it listed to the side. Kyle stopped the stallion and dismounted immediately, calming the nervous mare before she got too upset. Lilah looked over the edge of the cart to see the jagged spokes of the wheel cracked and broken. She looked back up at Kyle, who did
n’
t seem nervous.

            
 “
I
t’
s okay
,”
he told her
.“
We have another one just in case, here, let the horses graze while I work on this
.
”

              He unhitched the mare from the cart and allowed her to wander away a bit, grazing peacefully beside the stallion. Lilah hopped down and stood beside him.

              She could feel the heat of him through his thin button down shirt, and it made her head swim. He placed his hand on her lower back to move her a little away from the wheel so he could work, and she hoped that he had
n’
t heard her breath hitch at his touch. She hoped that he would
n’
t notice that she wanted to stay as close to him as possible. It did
n’
t seem to bother him, but what did she know? He hefted the spare wheel off the back of the cart and knelt to remove the broken wheel.

              As he worked, Lilah turned to the horizon, noticing that the dark clouds were nearly over them now. It was growing darker by the minute and she could tell that Kyle noticed that too. Once the wheel was finished, he wiped the sweat from his brow and looked up at the clouds Lilah was seeing.

            
 “
The only thing we can do now is hope that it does
n’
t rain very hard
,”
he said
,“
But I know ther
e’
s an empty cabin about ten miles ahead that we can bunk down in if the weather gets too bad, once we stop there, we can can assess
.
”

              Lilah nodded, feeling the first drop of rain darken her blouse.

            
 “
We should get going
,”
she said as she walked over to to the horses. The mare was a gentle soul, not nearly as gloomy looking as she originally thought. Lilah passed her fingers through the silky hair of the mar
e’
s mane, and smiled. She could get used to spending so much time with horses. Perhaps her entire life.

              They were off again, but they knew that they would
n’
t be able to make it all the way to the ranch as originally hoped, when the rain started falling. It was gentle at first, but the crack of thunder spooked the horses, and Lilah had to make soothing noises to calm the mare lest she start to run. The rain grew heavier, and Lilah grew more nervous until she saw the dark outline of the abandoned cabin on the road ahead. Relief hit her quickly, until another feeling of nervousness took its place.

              She was going to be alone with Kyle overnight, most likely.

              The thought of this brought a chill down her spine.

              He helped her down off of the cart, unhitching the mare to let her take shelter under an extended piece of wood with the stallion. The rain began pouring in earnest as they escaped into the cabin.

              It was a bare affair, yet cozy, perfectly set up for situations like this with a small bed boasting a threadbare quilt. There was a small camp stove as well, and Kyle gently placed a knapsack down on the wooden floor.

              Lilah kept her back to the wall as the rain made strange, cacophonous noises on the roof. Kyle removed some dried jerky, an apple or two, and handed one to Lilah who up until that point had not even been aware that she was hungry.

              She ate the apple and jerky gratefully while Kyle did the same, eyeing her appraisingly which made her want to ask just what he was staring at.

            
 “
So why did you do it
?”
he asked her after what seemed like hours. This caught Lilah by surprise, unsure of how to really respond to it.

            
 “
Why does anyone answer those things
?”
she asked flippantly. He gave a graceful shrug, and Lilah could not help but follow the movements of his muscles beneath his shirt again.

            
 “
I do
n’
t know
,”
he admitted
,“I’
ve never thought to do it
.
”

            
 “
Successful in your own right
?”
she asked sarcastically, he laughed a little and shook his head.

            
 “
And you are
n’
t
?
”

            
 “I’
m not
,”
she replied too quickly
,“I’
m...not
.
”

              His face looked gentle in the dim light
.“
I have a hard time believing that
.
”

              She studied his face in the dark, wondering if it would be worth it to tell him anything. After a moment or two, she decided that maybe it would be worth it after all.

            
 “
There was a boy back home, and oh I loved hi
m
…
”
She could feel her eyes growing misty and blinked the potential tears away, it would
n’
t be seemly to cry so easily in front of this virtual stranger. Kyle did
n’
t say anything so she took that as a cue to continue.

            
 “
It was
n’
t meant to be, mostly because I was a damn fool and did
n’
t tell him how I felt until it was too late
.
”

              His piercing blue eyes gave her the strength to continue.

            
 “
I
t’
s silly now that I think about it. But h
e’
s marrying someone else so ther
e’
s not much for me to do
.”
She laughed a little bit.

            
 “
So you left town
?”
Kyle bit into his apple thoughtfully
.“
You must have really loved him
.
”

            
 “
I thought I did, at the time, but part of me also wonders if I was just using my broken heart as an excuse to leave...I never really felt like I fit in there
.
”

              She had never admitted this to anyone else, but saying it now was liberating. It was only at this point that she realised that he had expressed shock at the fact that she had trouble with love, and blood had rushed to her face at the thought of it. Was it possible that he felt the same feelings she felt? It did
n’
t seem possible, but there was something in his gaze as they looked at each other from across the cabin that made her wonder if she might be onto something.

              Either way it was
n’
t right, and she cleared her throat nervously and fought desperately for a change of subject.

            
 “
So how about you? Have you ever been in love before
?
”

              Kyle was quiet for a very long time before he answered.

            
 “
I was married once
,”
he told her
.“
What feels like a long time ago. We were young sweethearts, quick to marry, but it worked out for us in the end. Sh
e
…
”
he hesitated to continue, but in that moment Lilah knew that he could say anything and she would be happy to listen. The more he spoke, the more she wanted to learn about him. Before she knew it, she had stood and made her way to his side, sitting down so that she could hear him better.

              Kyle looked as though he was struggling for the right words, and Lilah desperately wanted to let him know that it was alright, she would
n’
t judge him for his heartbreak. She could feel the warmth beside her even now, as though he were burning with a fever underneath his clothes, but she realised rather quickly that he was still in the peak of health. He just seemed like a man who ran hot. It took her a moment to realise that this was the closest she had ever really sat next to a man, and she liked it. Specifically, she liked sitting next to him.

            
 “
She died in childbirth
,”
he finally said
.“
About two years after we got hitched. I was twenty, she was only nineteen. The baby did
n’
t survive either
.
”

              Lilah opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out. He noticed this and laughed a little, uncomfortable at how dark the conversation had turned.

            
 “
Sh
e’
s buried under the apple tree on the ranch. I still like to visit her sometimes, although i
t’
s been about five years since then
.
”

              Lilah was speechless, how could she have fled her own town simply because the man she once loved had loved another, and here Kyle lived on the very property where the spectre of his wife loomed.

            
 “
How can you stand it
?”
she asked breathlessly. He turned his head to face hers, and he was so close that she swore that she could breathe in his own breath. She could count every single one of his eyelashes. Once again, she found herself left completely struck by him.

            
 “
I thought about leaving, but Harlan wanted me to stay. I mean, he understood if I had to, but he had been good to us, and I did
n’
t want to just leave him. Plus, I think that Ellie would have wanted me close by...now I do
n’
t really mind it
.
”

              The mention of her fian
cé
brought her momentarily back to reality. That was right, she had a
fian
cé
, she could
n’
t be sitting close to handsome young cowboys with beautiful eyes, listening to their sad tales and wanting to kiss the sadness from their eyes. She had to remembe
r
…

              Thunder crashed, and as it did she leaned over and kissed him. She could hear the horses whinnying nervously outside, and for a moment she wondered if she had just made the biggest mistake in her life. It was
n’
t until he wrapped his arms around her, bringing her closer while kissing her back, did she realise that he must have felt the same.

              They did
n’
t speak, and the only sound was the rustling of clothing, the occasional sigh, and a sweet moan that escaped his lips as she pressed herself against him. She had never been with a man like this before, but somehow out in the middle of this thunderstorm, in spite of everything, she felt brave. Perhaps it would only be for this night, perhaps he would never look at her again, perhaps tomorrow she would meet Harlan and they would marry. But for this moment they were simply two strangers who could not seem to get enough of each other.

              Shedding clothing along the way, their heated kissing led them to the bed, where he pushed her down, his hands on her breasts. She felt as though she were kissing the sun, as if
she
was the sun, her skin ran so hot underneath his touch. She felt as though she might burst into flames. Was this what love felt like? Would she even understand that? She sighed against his lips as his fingers moved down, and when they entered her she thought she might break apart.