Mended Affections (The Affections Series Book 2) (12 page)

Reagan

I'm elbow deep in a toilet when I hear the door slam. Striker must have finished early. I stand and remove my big yellow rubber gloves, before heading his way.

"Rea, you here?" he yells up the steps.

He sounds rushed and out of breath. My feet pick up their pace, as worry sets in. Maybe he's here because something has happened. I hit the steps and practically slide down on my socks. We collide when my feet hit the living room floor.

"Shit, Rea, you all right?"

"What's wrong, why are you yelling?" I feel my heart beating in my chest. I'm so fast to react these days. The fear of another catastrophe weighs heavy on me every day since Dalton's diagnosis.

Striker grabs me by my upper arms and a huge lopsided grin, that weakens my knees, takes over his face. "Nothing. I was just excited. I didn't mean to scare you, but I got a sitter."

"Ooookay. Why do we need a sitter?" I ask.

He pulls my body flush against his, and even though we are both fully dressed, I can feel the heat of his body radiating against my skin. "It's me and you tonight. I've got a few surprises planned out."

I'm finding it difficult to concentrate on his words with him this close. He's practically pushed me away, since Thanksgiving and his dating idea. I haven't dated since I was a teenager, and the thought of alone time makes me feel giddy inside. It's weird that Striker is the only man who I've ever dated, but this seems different. If feels right.

He is wearing a smile that covers his face. "What do you think? Wanna get out tonight, without the boys?"

"Yeah, I would love to. What time?" I ask.

"Around seven."

"I can't believe you got a hold of Riley. Was she okay? I've tried to call and drive by her house, but I haven't got a hold of her." I've been so concerned about her, over the last couple months.

Striker's hand reaches up to brush through his hair. "Actually, I did get a hold of her, but she said she was busy. She sounded really bad, Rea. I know she's been avoiding you, but have you talked to her at all?"

I step away, crossing my arms over my chest. Anxiety rises in my chest, as my concern for Riley causes all the excitement I was feeling about our date to fade. "I hear from her less and less. At first she sounded great. I knew she was keeping busy, trying to get her life together, but I swear there was something that happened. One day she was doing great and the next she sounded empty, like all the work she had put into herself was stripped away. I've called. I've stopped by her house. Hell, I've even stopped Kiley after school, but she seems oblivious, saying everything is okay. I don't know what to do. Max asks me all the time, why we don’t see them as often anymore, and I don't have an answer." I turn and look to Striker for some sort of answer. "What do I do?"

His head shakes slowly. "I don't know, but…" he walks toward me, and places his hand on my cheek, "let's enjoy tonight. We'll talk more about what to do tomorrow, and this weekend we'll hunt her down."

I smile at how determined he sounds, but then it hits me. "Wait, who's watching the kids then?"

His hand slips away, and he stands up straighter, like he's ready to defend his plans. "My aunt said she would be more than happy to come here and keep an eye on the boys."

"Your aunt, she's still in town?" I just assumed that she would head back to South Carolina.

"She’s deciding if she would like to stay here or not." He's cautious, as he responds.

"WHAT?" I say in surprise. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"You kind of led me to believe you wanted to hear everything from her. If that's not true, I have no problem telling you what's going on." He holds his hands up in defense.

I did always put him off when it came to talking about Mrs. Knowles, or Becky, I should say. Good luck getting used to calling her that.

Striker walks over and takes a seat on the couch. He leans forward, until his elbows rest on his knees, and rubs his palms together. "Look, Rea, remember a while back, right before Dalton returned from his trip. I had decided that staying in your home wasn't a good idea. I leased an apartment that day, and she's asked me to keep it, so she has a place to escape to. Once the divorce was final, she moved in there, until she figures out what else to do."

I shouldn't have shut him down every time he asked if I wanted to know details about his aunt. I hate the idea of her being close, but that's based strictly on her old behaviors. If she's being genuine, then I need to give her a chance. It would be freeing to let my hate toward her go, and finally move into a healthy relationship with my children's grandmother, especially for Dalton's sake. "Sorry, I didn't mean to sound so alarmed. I was just shocked. Do you trust her to come here without causing any problems?"

His eyes meet mine. "I do, Rea. She's been through enough, and I know she wants to find something good in this life. I don't think she has it in her to fight anymore."

I have to trust. It's part of moving forward. I can find strength in giving to others. If it's important to her to be a part of the boys’ life, then I need to step aside, even though my gut reaction is to force her out. "Okay, she can come babysit for us."

The sexy, lopsided smirk, which has been hiding from me for months, graces Striker's handsome face for the second time tonight, causing him to look that much hotter. His slightly rugged appearance has always caused my heart to race, but when you add in that smirk, I can't help but melt a little. I become putty in his hands, and tonight I will follow him wherever he wants to take me.

"Fuck, I thought for sure you'd say no." He jumps from his seat, grabs the back of my neck, and lays a kiss on my forehead. "You're gonna love this, Rea. You'll be happy you decided to spend a night with just me and all my hotness. I promise."

He was always conceited to a fault when we were younger, but this is the first of I've heard it since he has come back into my life.

"And there's that cocky asshole I remember," I tease.

He exits the living room and hollers back to me, "Go get ready, Rea. I'll get the boys and stop for takeout. You don't need to be fancy. As a matter of fact those comfy yoga pants you love will be perfect."

I laugh, knowing the yoga pants would be more for his pleasure than my comfort. I climb the stairs, two at a time, feeling my excitement return. I picture all the times we would meet in the woods, and how great our alone time always made me feel. I welcome the peace I feel after an evening with him and look forward to embracing it tonight. Tonight it's just us. We're just Reagan and Striker.

Striker

I rush to my bathroom and turn the hot water on, while dialing my aunt's number.

"So what did she say? I'm sure she hated the idea," Aunt Becky answers.

"No, actually, can you be here earlier? Say six o'clock?" I ask, in a rush.

There's a smile in her voice. "Absolutely, I'll be there."

I hang up and undress, looking at my reflection in the mirror above the sink. The steam already fogs the glass, but not enough to block out the broken heart etched on my skin. I trace a finger over its jagged edge. I was in a low place when I had this placed over my heart. It was my second year in the Air Force. After an evening out with my boys, and one too many drinks, all the emotions I had been harboring over the years stood forefront in my mind.

The loss of my parents and Reagan wore heavily on me, and I had no hope of ever moving forward. My friend Andy, and all of his craziness, drug all of us into a tattoo parlor, his fling of the night included. Andy took one look at the board displaying all his possible options for permanently marking his skin, then turned and asked the girl which one she liked.  She was about five foot two, with long blonde hair pulled up on the top of her head. Walking over slowly to the board, she turned giving Andy a smirk. Her polished finger lifted and pointed to the most feminine butterfly I had ever seen, but Andy wears it proudly to this day.

My choice in ink that night was a little more calculated. I marred my skin to show my pain. Now as I look at the torn heart, placed strategically on my chest, I wonder how I could fix this if things work out in my favor with Rea. I still miss my parents every day, and now I grieve for the loss of my best friend, but if I get my girl back, my heart will be whole again.

I wipe my hand across the mirror, clearing the fog away, and take one last look at myself. Inside, the feelings of being a teenage boy again swirl in my gut, but staring back at me is the man I've worked hard to become.

I fought hard to stay true to myself. I fought hard not to live in hate and fear everyday that I woke up, knowing I would never see my parents again, and that my best friend married my girl. Dalton never tried to explain why he did what he did, and I never asked. I lived the last eleven years wondering why, but once he neared his last day, he couldn't apologize and explain enough. I'm proud that I never got angry with him, because he too was just a man in love with a girl.

Pushing all thoughts of Dalton out of my head, I step into the shower. The warmth of the water feels good against my skin, but does little to relieve the adrenaline coursing through me. I can't wait to surprise her. I know well enough that fancy things don't impress her. Shit, all it takes to impress me are those skintight yoga pants she prances around in, putting her ass on display.

I quickly wash, and dress in my favorite button up shirt and jeans, with leather boots. I grab my toothbrush and scrub my teeth not once, but twice. Ridiculous, I know. Finger combing my hair is all I add and stuff my pockets with my keys and wallet, so I can be on own way. I'm being a little impatient, but hell, I've been waiting for this moment for years. I just want to get on with it.

I rush down the hall, and holler up the steps. "Rea, I'm getting ready to head out and grab the boys?"

"Okay."

"Do you care what I grab them for dinner?" I ask.

"No, whatever you want is fine."

*****

"All right boys, where would you like to stop and grab dinner?" Turning my head, I look at Dylan sitting next to me for a brief moment, before returning my eyes back to the road.

"We're stopping now? Why so early?" Max asks from the back seat.

I catch his eyes in the rearview mirror. "Your mom and I are gonna go out for a bit alone, so we thought we'd eat together before we leave."

"Why alone?" he asks, sounding confused.

"I just thought it would be nice to get her out of the house for a while, to do something fun." I try to sound lighthearted about it, but from the look he's giving me, I can't help but feel a little uneasy.

His eyebrows furrow and his nose scrunches. "So it's not a date or anything then."

Shit, he looks disgusted at the thought of me dating his mother. "Um, well, would that bother you?"

Max looks down at his lap, as he ponders my words. "Well yeah, kind of. She's married to my dad."

All the hope and excitement I felt earlier just drained from me with those words. I know the boys all love me, and so I never once thought they would object to us dating. We already raise the boys together, like a married couple would do. I treat all of them as if they were my own. I don't want them to lack a father figure. Dalton didn't want that for them either. He had his plan mapped out before putting me back in Reagan's life. His boys were going to have a father, even if it couldn't be him. I guess this is my first challenge.

My hands grip tighter on the steering wheel. "Max, I love your mom, and I love all of you boys. Right now, all I would like to do is spend some adult time with your mom, so that we can relax and talk for a bit. We don't have to label it as anything that makes any of you uncomfortable. Okay, buddy?"

"So, it is a date then," Dylan says.

I can't help but shoot him a look. He has to be kidding me. "No, it's two adults having some grown up time out of the house."

Dylan smiles at me. "Wouldn't it be a heck of a lot easier to just say, date?"

I feel the tension in my jaw, as my teeth clench together. Since when did he become the aggravating kid? Max is now staring out the window with a frown on his face.

"Well, I don't care. Mommy has been sad, but I catch her smiling sometimes when she looks at you," Colt chimes in.

I feel a lump form in my throat and try to swallow it down. I'm not sure what it is in reaction to; the fact that he has to watch his mom suffer from the loss of his father, or the fact that I can relate to a six-year-old when it comes to making his mother happy. Then it hits me on how to win Max over.

"Max." He turns and his eyes meet mine in the rearview mirror. "Look, buddy, things have been tough on all of us. I don't want to make things harder, but I do want your mom to smile every day. Do you want to see her happy again?"

He nods his head in agreement.

"That's all I want to do, bud, try to make your mom happy. Is that okay?" I ask him.

"I just hate that Dad isn't here to hug her when she's sad. He always made her feel better," Max says.

"I know, buddy. I hate it, too." I do. I hate that he's not here every day. While I selfishly love the thought of being with Reagan again, I would trade all my happiness to bring Dalton back. Not only would Rea have her husband and best friend back, but the boys would have their father in their lives, to help raise them into men just as amazing as he was.

"Can we just stop by McDonald's?" Colt asks.

Way to change the subject, buddy. "Are you sure? We can get something from a better restaurant."

"Yeah, they have Star Wars toys, and I want one," he says, pushing himself up in his seat, trying to get my attention in the mirror, so I can see his excitement.

McDonald's it is then.

*****

Rea walks over to Colt, sitting on the couch and kisses the top of his head. "All right, boys, we'll be back sometime tonight." She makes her rounds around the room, kissing each boy goodbye. "Grandmom is here if you need anything, and I'm just a phone call away if you have any problems and need me."

"We'll be fine, Rea. I promise," Aunt Becky says, while leaning against the doorframe for the entrance to the kitchen.

Rea stands and gives her a timid smile. She's unsure how to feel about leaving them with my aunt. I can't really blame her, but I know everything will be okay. Plus, Dylan is not that small of a child anymore, and he's fairly responsible. Shit, some days, I think he can handle life better than I can.

"Well, okay, I guess we'll head out then. Please call for anything, Mrs. Knowl... I mean, Becky." Rea walks to where I'm standing at the front door.

"See you boys in a bit. Have fun with Grandmom." I grab Rea's hand and lead her out of the house.

"Have fun," Aunt Becky calls out, as the screen door slams behind us.

We're only halfway to the car when Reagan's hand tugs back on mine. I turn to see why she's halted her stride, and a concerned look covers her face. I hope she doesn't feel like I'm pushing her to leave the boys. "What's wrong?"

"Do you think they're okay with this? They barely know her." Her voice is soft as she speaks, not at all full of the panic I expected to hear.

Turning to face her, I reach up and rest my hand strategically on her neck, feeling the drum of her pulse under my touch. "I lived with the woman for years, but before I moved in, we would have sleepovers all the time at her house, and they were some of the best nights because of her. I know things were rough between the two of you, but I promise she loves the boys. We've talked about them often, over the last several months, and she wants to make a good impression on them. We'll get back and they will have lots of fun things to tell us about. I promise."

Her eyes are fixed to mine, as trust shines through, letting me know that she is going to follow my lead.  "Okay."

I smile, placing a kiss to her forehead, then lead us the rest of the way to my truck, which is all set for the night. I walk around to the passenger side, opening the door for her, and help guide her into the seat. I wet my lips as thoughts of caressing that tight little ass of hers cross my mind. It's covered in just what I asked her to wear, along with some hot as fuck, knee high brown boots. Luckily for me the shirt she chose for tonight barely covers the top of her pants, so I don't have to worry about my view being blocked by obnoxiously long material. She's warmly dressed from the waist up, in a formfitting coat, and a hat and scarf that accentuate the beautiful blue of her eyes. I'm going to have a hard time not staring into them tonight.

Once she's settled, I shut her door and jog around to my side of the truck. Taking a deep breath of air, I try to calm my nerves, which have decided to make me a jittery mess. I didn't notice I was this nervous until I shut her in the truck, but there’s no time to think about it now. I tug on my door handle, opening my side so that I can climb in. I rub my hands against my jeans, freeing them from the sweat building on my palms. The engine fires to life as I turn the key, but we remain silent.

Rea doesn't speak until we are about halfway to our destination. "Are you going to tell me where we’re headed? There's not much on this side of town."

I smile and turn toward her for a brief moment. "Not tonight, Rea, this is a surprise. I hope you enjoy it."

She reaches forward and adjusts the radio to a station she likes. Changing from my classic rock station to country, and in my opinion they don't play much country music. She likes it though, so I don't mind. I hear her quietly sing along to the song playing and it reminds me of simpler times; ones that I would trade anything to get back. Life before I left Rea was happy, full of laughter. Maybe tonight will help her to remember that, and together, we can find the best happiness, one that comes naturally.

I turn off the main road and Reagan sits up straighter in her seat. "Are we going to the pond? It's cold out, Striker. What are we doing here?"

"Don't worry I'm prepared for the cold. I just thought a first date, doing what we used to love, sounded like a fun night." I reach over and thread my fingers through hers.

She gives me a tight-lipped smile, and I know she is remembering all the times we shared in our woods back home. The pond we are headed to tonight is mainly surrounded by woods. It has a small clearing where I can park the truck and we can watch the stars. It's something I love to do here. There are no city lights to lessen the stars brightness, which makes the experience absolutely amazing.

I pull in and back my truck up until it nears the edge of the water. "Okay, we're here. Stay in the truck for me. I want to set it all up before you come out in the cold."

"Huh? Set what up?" she asks, confused as to what I could possibly set up, here of all places.

"Just wait here." I jump out of the truck and walk around to the bed. I pull out heavy, down blankets and pillows. I even brought a foam mattress topper to lay down in the bed to create a softer place for us. I get it all laid out and place the cooler on the tailgate, so it's within reach. I take one glance up at the sky, and it is amazing. There are stars for as far as you can see, tons of them. This has turned out perfect.

I walk to Rea's door and open it, sticking my hand out, so I can assist her to the ground. "All set. You ready?"

"I guess so. I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to be ready for, but lead the way." She places her tiny hand in mine, and when I close my fingers, her hand is lost amongst mine.

She walks ahead of me to the back of the truck. "Wow, Strike. You turned the back of your truck into a bed. How forward of you. I thought we agreed to cool things down a bit."

I laugh at her sarcasm, but the thought of taking her while we are out here tonight has already crossed my mind. I've had to talk myself down, more than once, on the way over here. I walk up behind her; placing my hands to her hips, and whisper in her ear, "Look up, Rea." Her eyes meet the sky, and a tiny gasp escapes her lips as she takes in the sky's beauty. "While I would love to peel all of this off of you out here, and have my way with you, that's not what this is about. We're only here to star gaze."