Mermaids Singing (33 page)

Iris’s screams brought them back to life. Rackham was the first to move, running down the stairs to examine the crumpled body, sprawled like an ungainly puppet whose strings had been cut. Kitty and Bella followed him more slowly and Iris collapsed in hysterics at the top of the stairs.

‘Fetch the doctor, George,’ Rackham said, kneeling down and feeling for a heartbeat.

With an anxious glance at Mr Warner, who seemed momentarily dumbstruck, George scurried off, his footsteps echoing through the silent house.

Warner leaned against the newel post and, taking a large, cotton hankie from his pocket, he mopped his brow. ‘Is he breathing, Sir?’

Shaking his head, Rackham got to his feet. ‘I don’t think there’s anything to be done. We’ll wait for the doctor.’

Wrapping her arms around Leonie, Bella cuddled the sobbing child to her breast. ‘There, there, my darling. Mama is here and I’ll never, never leave you again.’

Warner cleared his throat. ‘Perhaps it would be better in the circumstances if you took Miss Leonie down to the drawing room, my lady.’

Bella nodded silently, not trusting herself to speak. Her knees were shaking, and it was all she could do to stop herself from burying her face in Leonie’s blonde curls and sobbing, as shock and relief surged over her in huge, drenching waves.

‘Let me have her, Bella. Best to get her away from this,’ Kitty said, holding her arms out to Leonie. ‘Come to Kitty, darling.’

Sobbing, Leonie wrapped her arms around Kitty’s neck and reluctantly, Bella let her go.

‘I’ll wait in the cab,’ Kitty whispered, taking Leonie by the hand. ‘Be brave, Bella.’

Bella made to follow Kitty as she hurried down the staircase, pushing past Warner, but a cry from the upper landing made everyone look up. Pointing an accusing finger at Bella, Iris came down the stairs, white-faced and shaking with fury. ‘You murderess! You killed my father.’

Rackham moved swiftly, placing himself between Bella and Iris. ‘It was an accident.’

‘She killed him. Send someone for the constable, Warner.’

Warner cleared his throat with a nervous little cough. ‘Begging your pardon, Miss Iris, but Sir Desmond slipped and fell. We all saw it.’

‘I don’t care what you say you saw.’ Iris’s voice rose to a screech. ‘She was responsible. And she’s not going to take Leonie away from her home.’

‘Pull yourself together,’ Rackham said, his voice cold as chipped ice. ‘Warner is right. It was an accident and I think you’re forgetting that Lady Mableton is Leonie’s mother and legal guardian. This is still her home and I’d be careful what I said if I were you, Iris.’

‘My father is dead and it’s all your fault.’ Iris drew herself up to her full height. ‘At least show him some respect.’

‘This is very distressing for you, Ma’am,’ Warner said. ‘Might I suggest you adjourn to the drawing room until the doctor arrives?’

‘You’re quite right, Warner,’ Rackham said, taking Bella by the hand. ‘We’ll wait in the drawing room.’

Bella stared at the inert body of her husband and she was shocked to realise that she felt nothing but relief. Glancing up into Rackham’s face, Bella read sympathy and understanding in his eyes and she looked away quickly.

‘I’m staying with Papa,’ Iris said, through clenched teeth. ‘Make the most of your freedom, Giles. I promise you it won’t be for long.’

Back in the safety of the house in Sackville Street, Bella went to take the sleeping Leonie from Kitty’s arms. ‘Let me take her, Kitty. I want to put her down in her own little bed next to mine.’

Kitty shook her head. ‘Best not waken her, poor little moppet. I’ll put her to bed, but it’s you she’ll see when she wakes.’

Bella knew this was good sense but her arms ached to hold Leonie once again. She longed to breathe in the sweet scent of her child, who was no longer a baby but had grown, during their enforced separation, into a beautiful little girl.

Rackham laid his hand on her arm. ‘Kitty is right, don’t disturb the poor child.’

Bella swallowed the lump in her throat, wiping her hand across her eyes. ‘I’ve waited so long for this moment.’ She watched Kitty as she carried Leonie up the staircase, and suddenly the enormity of what had happened that evening flooded over her in a tidal wave of shock and pent-up emotion. She did not resist when Rackham put his arms around her. ‘It all seems like a bad dream, Giles,’ she said, resting her head against his shoulder.

‘It’s all over now, my pet,’ Rackham said, speaking in a tone he might have used to comfort Leonie. ‘You are a free woman.’

‘And I have you to thank for it, Giles. I’ve been a bitch to you recently, and I’m truly sorry.’

Rackham lifted her chin with his finger and laid it gently across her lips to silence her. ‘I’ve deserved most of it, my love, but at least now I’ve managed to make amends.’

There was something so final in his tone that Bella searched his face, trying to read his carefully guarded expression. ‘What are you trying to tell me?’

His smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. ‘I’m going away, Bella. You don’t need me any longer.’

‘You’re leaving?’ Bella clutched his arm, fighting down an inexplicable feeling of panic. ‘But you can’t just go like this. Not when I’ve so much to thank you for.’

Rackham patted her hand, smiling ruefully. ‘You don’t have to thank me. I had a lot to make up for and now it’s done.’

Icicles of cold fear spiked in Bella’s blood. ‘What are you saying?’

‘It’s time for us to say goodbye, my dear.’

‘No, Giles. This is silly. You don’t have to go.’

‘Bella, my darling, you’ve made it plain enough over and over again that you don’t want me, and I’ve never pressed my suit on any woman. But the sad truth is that I love you, Bella. I’ve always been in love with you, right from the start when you were little more than a child. I was wrong to take you as I did, but for myself I’ve never regretted one moment of our time together. Now I hope I’ve made up just a little for everything that happened in the past.’

‘You love me?’

‘I do love you.’

‘No, you don’t. You’ve said that to hundreds of women, including Iris. I don’t believe you, Giles.’

‘That’s your prerogative, my dear, but I’ve never lied to you,’ Giles said, kissing her lightly on the lips. Prising her fingers gently off his sleeve, he turned to go.

‘Giles, stop! You can’t go now.’ Bella’s lips burned from the brief caress and she clutched her hand to her mouth.

Rackham paused, shaking his head. ‘There’s bound to be gossip even though we’ve got witnesses to prove that Mableton’s death was an accident. It’s best for all of us if I leave the country for a while.’

‘That is so stupid,’ Bella cried, stamping her foot. ‘You’re running away, as usual, Giles, and it’s not fair.’

‘I don’t play fair, Bella, you ought to know that. I’m a bounder, a cad, a rotter, anything you like to call me, and you are better off without me. I’m leaving for Monte Carlo first thing in the morning.’

Forcing her frozen limbs to move, Bella ran and caught him by the hand as he opened the door. ‘You are none of those things, Giles. You’ve done all this for me and I’ve been hateful to you. Please, please, stay.’

Rackham’s eyes were sombre. ‘Do you still love Edward Mableton? Give me an honest answer, Bella.’

Pain constricted her throat, tears burned the back of her eyes, but she couldn’t lie to him; couldn’t speak; couldn’t even shake her head even though it might make him change his mind about leaving.

‘I thought as much. Goodbye, Bella.’

The door closed and he was gone. ‘No, Giles, no,’ Bella cried, tears pouring down her cheeks. She wrenched the door open and ran down the steps into the quiet street. His tall figure was striding away towards Piccadilly, his opera cloak billowing out behind him. She opened her mouth to call him back, but no words came and, clutching at the iron railings, she sank down onto the steps watching until he was swallowed up by the night. Suddenly she was afraid. Afraid like the fourteen-year-old girl violated by her own father, waiting in the filthy back parlour of the pub in the Commercial Road: waiting for the man to whom she had been sold for a few golden guineas. It had never crossed her mind until this moment that she had been lucky that the man was Giles Rackham. She had not realised, until he had gone, that in some unexplainable way she had relied on the knowledge that, when she needed him most, he would be there for her. She had told him she hated him so often that she had convinced herself that it was true; but now she realised she did not hate him at all. She had wasted so much time rebelling against their relationship. She had deliberately chosen to forget that it was Giles who had taught her the delights and sensual pleasures of physical love. He had been patient and gentle with her, until she had learned to respond to his lovemaking and then, it was true, he had taken her to the heights of ecstasy and beyond. But, she thought miserably, he had never told her he loved her. She had felt lonely and abandoned when he went off on his gambling trips; the fact that he had made her stay in England for her own welfare and safety had not occurred to her then, but the truth flooded over her now in a painful revelation.

Rackham had left her financially well provided for in the hotel in Dover and, if Maria had not been down on her luck and come searching for her, Bella had to admit to herself that she would have waited for him to return. He always came back, sooner or later. Maria had encouraged her to think the worst of Rackham and the best of Sir Desmond. Still, Bella thought miserably, she could have refused to have anything to do with Maria’s plans for her, but instead she had listened to her mother and followed her instructions to the letter.

Bella sighed, shaking her head. It had been the lure of financial security that had made her sell herself to a much older man. She could have said no at any time, but she did not. She could not blame Maria or Rackham; the choice had been hers and hers alone. Dragging herself to her feet, Bella wiped her eyes on her sleeve. Giles had been a part of her life for so long that she could not imagine going on forever without him. He would be back. Rackham always came back, didn’t he?

There was surprisingly little furore over Desmond’s death. Of course it was in the newspapers the next day, and the funeral was reported, with Miss Iris Mableton being named as the chief mourner; Captain Sir Edward Mableton, Bt. not having returned as yet from the war in South Africa. The fact that Lady Arabella Mableton, widow of Sir Desmond, was absent from her husband’s funeral was not mentioned in any of the reports, and for that Bella was grateful. She wanted nothing to do with the house in Dover Street; at least not until Edward returned, and then things would be different. Now that she was widowed there was nothing to stand in their way. She was certain that he still loved her and she settled down to wait for his return.

Bella received weekly postcards from Giles – not that he wrote much by way of a message, but using the same old code they had developed years ago, he sent her a card from every town and city that he visited. She kept them, tied with a blue satin ribbon and tucked behind a teacup, on the kitchen dresser. Giles was, she had realised, her
alter ego
; his failings were her own failings, his strengths were her strengths; they were bound by invisible cords and, without a doubt, he would return one day to annoy and torment her. She had been devastated when he left but she would get over it. After all, it was Edward whom she really loved and the war could not go on forever.

In the meantime, it was pure joy to have Leonie back. At first the little girl was a bit uncertain and shy, overawed by the number of people living in the same house and a bit nervous of the other children. But, as the days went by Leonie grew in confidence and she had taken a liking to Violet, who was immediately her devoted slave. Leonie now bossed Harry around and had a fit of the sulks when it didn’t work with the older boys. Maggie had really taken to Leonie and, like a mother hen, cared for her along with her own brood, relieving Bella of the dreary tasks of motherhood that, with a houseful of servants, had never been her lot.

There was only one problem brought about by her sudden state of widowhood, and that was due to the fact that Humphrey now thought of her as being his own personal property. He was becoming more and more persistent in his attentions, and his veiled suggestions that he might set her up as his mistress in an establishment of her own had become daily demands. Bella had so far managed to fend him off with smiles and vague promises but she knew that, sooner or later, she would have to refuse outright and that would not go down well with Mr Chester. She could not afford to lose her job, and possibly her home, especially now that she had Leonie’s future to consider.

The letter from Feeney, Feeney and Rumbelow requesting her attendance at their Lincoln’s Inn Fields offices came as a complete surprise. Maria said sarcastically that Sir Desmond had probably bequeathed her a fortune in his will, but Bella was instantly alert and terrified that the legal matter might have something to do with Leonie. What would she do if Desmond had made her a ward of court or, even worse, made Iris her legal guardian? She had no knowledge of the law and no one to consult. If only Giles were here, she thought, as she sat in the hansom cab on her way to Holborn. If there were any doubts about her right to bring up her child, she would have to take Leonie and flee the country.

The clerk did not keep her waiting this time. He showed her into Mr Feeney’s office and left immediately. Mr Feeney rose from behind his desk and came round to offer her a chair.

‘Please get to the point, Mr Feeney,’ Bella said, nerves making her voice sharp.

‘Of course, my lady. It’s good of you to come to my office.’ Mr Feeney cleared his throat nervously and picked up a document with a big red seal on the front. Unfolding it he cleared his throat again. ‘This is your late husband’s will. He altered it just a few weeks before the tragic accident. I won’t read the part that doesn’t concern you but –’

‘Just tell me the important bits,’ Bella said, praying that he couldn’t see that her hands were trembling. She just wanted to know the worst and get it over with.