Middle of Knight (27 page)

“Dammit, Jones!” Jessica stood, resting her palms on the table.

Three heads jerked up and the dog scampered off to the living room, certain he was in trouble. Old habit. Luke may have bought her a dog and named him Jones, but when she was pissed, Luke’s name was still Jones. Actually, first name Dammit, last name, Jones.

“I didn’t want to have it out right here in front of your parents, but it would seem they know more than I do so maybe this needs to be a group conversation. You know damn well that
I,
more than anyone else, believe the past should stay buried with the dead, but yours is not, so out with it. Francesca—I want every. Little. Detail.”

Tom and Felicity frowned at Luke with pain in their eyes.

“Jessica, sweetie, he might not be ready to talk about this,” Felicity said.

“Is that right, Luke? Because you said I could ask you
anything,
and now I want everything.”

“Maybe we should give you two some privacy.”

“Sit. Down.”

Tom and Felicity didn’t move. Jessica could be cutthroat—literally.

“I’d been drinking Heineken with my college roommate, Levi,” Luke spoke in a grave tone. “We’d both had at least four or five too many. He told me about his friend back home who was screwing his roommate’s fiancée. He asked my advice … asked me what his friend should do if the roommate found out they were screwing around behind his back. I couldn’t even think that night … I was completely wasted. So I laughed and said he should put a bullet through both of their heads.”

His parents watched him. Pain. The pain was palpable, and she still didn’t know why.

“A week later I found Levi in the shower with blood and bits of his brain scattered on the wall, a gun next to his limp hand. In the note on the counter he said he wasn’t worth going to jail over so he saved me a life sentence, and he chose the shower to keep the mess contained because of my obsession with cleanliness. Then he asked me to forgive Fran and raise his kid as my own.”

Tom wrapped his arm around Felicity as silent sobs shook her body. But Luke … he said every word without an ounce of emotion, eyes locked to Jessica’s the whole time.

“Fran had his baby?” Jessica whispered.

Luke shook his head. “Nope. While he positioned his newly purchased forty-five at his temple, Fran was off having an abortion and then she planned on ending it with him because she still wanted to marry me. I’ve always wondered whose heart stopped first … his or his baby’s.” He blinked slowly several times. “I think you can guess why Fran and I didn’t work out. We both had blood on our hands.”

“Luke,” Jessica said but no other words came out.

“Anyway, I started college majoring in business. After my first year I switched to pre-med, inspired by my work as a firefighter. Psychiatry has been my own personal quest to figure out why, even in my plastered state, I thought death was a fair payback for cheating. And even more than that … what makes a person give up absolutely everything because he broke some sort of bro code.”

He stood and before completely unfolding himself from the chair, he kissed Jessica on the cheek. “That’s everything, my love,” he whispered over her skin before he turned and walked out of the dining room.

The slam of the front door felt like a book closing at the end of the final chapter.

“Luke made his peace with Francesca after Levi’s funeral. It wasn’t pretty, but it was final. Even though he doesn’t blame her, she’s been dead to him for years. If she dies, maybe he’ll feel some sort of peace that Levi’s been reunited with the woman he loved and the mother of his child. But Luke doesn’t need to see her.”

Jessica heard every word Felicity said, but she couldn’t determine if they were words of wisdom or those of a mother trying to protect her child from any more pain.

*

Luke stood at
the end of the dock, squinting against the cool, numbing breeze as the sun set behind a scattering of clouds suspended in the orangish-purple sky. He missed Levi every damn day.

New bro code: save the bro, kill the ho.

Levi would have laughed at that. He had the best sense of humor. The guy actually giggled like a girl. Luke gave him shit about it, but secretly he loved watching Levi laugh. At the same time, he was a total idiot—missing half of his classes to watch
The Simpsons
and lift weights. Levi looked like an ironman. He claimed muscles and an accent was all it took to get the ladies. Fran certainly helped prove his point.

“That blood on your hands …”

Luke sucked in a quick breath as Jessica’s voice drew near.

“… it never disappears. At best, you might be like me and find someone who loves you so completely that they see past that blood to the naked, untainted flesh beneath it.” She wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her cheek against his back.

He squeezed her hands. “I figured you’d be like everyone else and try to convince me that I’m not responsible for Levi’s death.”

“I suppose I should, but we both know I’m not like everyone else.”

“Amen to that.” He turned, holding her like the lifeline she was while releasing a long breath.

“Why didn’t you just tell me all of that a long time ago?”

“I would have, had our relationship not started out as doctor/patient. You were my focus and I needed you to trust and respect me enough to let me help you. I felt like sharing the weakest moment … the darkest time of my life would lessen my credibility as a psychiatrist.”

“But you told me to ask you anything.”

“I did.”

“Why?”

“Because you trusting me as the man who adores you beyond words has become more important to me than your opinion of Dr. Jones.”

“I think you overestimated my opinion of Dr. Jones.”

“I think you eat men’s egos for breakfast.”

Jessica smiled, looking up at him for a few seconds before it reversed into a frown. “I was rude to your parents. I think I need to apologize.”

“We were all rude to you.”

She took his hand, pulling him toward the house. “I hadn’t noticed.”

“Of course not … you were too busy planning your holiday getaway with your lover on his private island.”

She whipped around. “So you
were
paying attention.”

“I’m always paying attention … but only half of the things you say to me deserve a response.” He jerked his hand from hers then gave her a playful body check. She stumbled a few steps to the side.

“First one to the house gets to swim naked in the lake tonight,” he said, sprinting to the house.

“Dammit, Jones! You did
not
just shove me.”

He’d fallen hard for a fiery little woman, but he knew without looking back, she chased his ass with a huge grin on her face. Even if he didn’t die with her, he’d die loving her.

*

Jessica apologized to
Felicity and Tom. They both dismissed it, insisting they were the ones who needed to apologize. After the truce, they ate lukewarm fajitas and finished the rest of the melted margaritas and browned guacamole.

“Luke’s jumping into the lake naked tonight. I think we all should.”

Luke choked on the last ounce of his drink while his parents smiled, eyes wide.

“I—it was a joke.” He cleared his throat.

“I’m in.” Felicity looked at Tom.

He winked at her, white teeth peeking through his boyish smile. Jessica hoped decades and a slew of kids later that Luke would still look at her that way.

“Great! We’re going to need blankets, a roaring fire in the back fire pit, and more alcohol.” Jessica stood with a slight wobble to her tequila legs.

“I’ll get the blankets and alcohol.” Felicity eased out of her chair with Tom holding her steady at the hips.

“Luke and I will start the fire.”

“No! No. No. No.” Luke shook his head. “Did you not hear me? It was a joke. There will be no jumping in the freezing lake naked. I am not … I
refuse
to get naked with my girlfriend
and
my parents. God … just no.”

“Come on, Son, live a little.”

Luke glared at Tom. “As a doctor I should warn you of the dangers. You could go into cardiac arrest or—”

Tom laughed. “I hate to disappoint you, but this isn’t my first skinny dip in the lake … not even my first this week.” He swatted Felicity on the ass. She blew him a kiss over her shoulder.

Luke remained glued to his chair at the table with his face buried in his hands.

“Oh my God!” Jessica giggled in Luke’s ear. “I love your parents so much.”

Luke looked up with a wrinkled, pleading look etched on his face. “Do you two jump in the lake naked with any of my siblings?”

Felicity tucked a six pack of beer between the pile of blankets. “No. But only because they’ve never suggested it.”

He glared at Jessica.

“This is happening … it was your idea. Don’t make promises you can’t keep. Now, up.” She tugged his arm until he lumbered to standing.

Surrounded by the chirping and rustling creatures of the night, they made their way down the hill to the fire pit Tom stoked to life with more kindling.

“Who’s going in first?” Felicity taunted her son with a sly grin.

“It should be Luke, but the stick in the mud is always the last one to join the party so …” Jessica shimmied out of her jeans.

“Jess, don’t … please.”

“Sorry.” She giggled. “I lost all inhibition three drinks ago, Jonesy.”

Top. Bra. Panties.

“Carpe diem!”

The air was cool in the lower fifties. The water—arctic. Rising to the surface, she gasped only to be greeted by Tom and Felicity midair, holding hands. Boobs, balls, and bare booties.

“Ahh!” A creature from the deep attacked her. “Oh my God, Luke.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “I d-didn’t s-see you j-jump i-in.”

His bluish lips sucked on hers until their teeth chattered against each other. “F-fucking cold.” Luke grinned, his whole body shivering.

“Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one … out!” Felicity yelled as she and Tom raced to the ladder on the dock.

Tom showed no signs of aging as he leapt up the ladder and helped Felicity out. Jessica and Luke quickly followed, all four staggering in a shivering race to the fire and blankets.

“H-here.” Felicity tossed Luke and Jessica a huge blanket. “W-wool.” She and Tom wrapped up together in the other blanket, plunking down in a chair by the fire.

As their bodies regained a bit of feeling, dodging hypothermia by mere seconds, Jessica started giggling. “We’re completely naked, wrapped in a blanket together four feet from your parents who are also naked, wrapped in a blanket together.”

Tom and Felicity shared her humor with big smiles while Luke rolled his eyes.

“My parents are pretty cool, but they would
never
do what we just did.”

“Hear that, Luke. Jessica thinks we’re cool.” Tom smirked.

“Yeah, Dad. Jumping in balls first, practically two feet from my girlfriend’s face … that’s real cool.”

The cackling around the fire pit grew with each new remark. Everyone had their own assessment of the sixty seconds of complete insanity. It may have been the cold water, the crisp fall air, the flicker of the flames, or the amazing company, but Jessica felt so alive. A weird feeling enveloped her for that small moment in time: normalcy.

“I love your son,” Jessica said with a soft voice.

Three sets of eyes fell onto her as the only sound that remained was the flames whispering into the night. Luke hugged her tighter to his naked body. It wasn’t sexual, it was natural, destined, perfect.

“He saved me from a dark place. He proved I’m worthy of love, physical touch, endearing words, and complete adoration.” She interlaced her fingers with his over her belly. “My best friend and I were kidnapped before our senior year in high school.”

“Jess …” Luke whispered.

She shook her head. A quivering smile tugged at her lips. “It’s okay.” Her hands squeezed his. “I’m … better now. I’m better because of you.”

He leaned forward and kissed her neck.

“Claire, my friend … she died. My innocence died that day too. To say I’ve had trust issues would be a monumental understatement. I’ve done some things that are truly unforgivable, even … unimaginable. But your son never wavered, not even a blink. Luke’s never looked at me as broken, even though I am. He’s just loved all my pieces—even the ones that have made him bleed.”