Midnight Surrender: A Paranormal Romance Anthology (13 page)

She closed her eyes and leaned back against her pillows. She was quiet for so long I nearly thought she’d fallen asleep.

“
I only regret I don’t have more to regret,” she said at last.

“
I don’t understand,” I said.

Her faded blue eyes met mine. “Make mistakes, Tessa. Seize every opportunity. Don’t let yourself walk away wondering what if. You’ll never get that chance again if you waste it. And when it’s your time, accept your next chapter with grace.” Her fingers were brittle twigs wrapped in tissue-paper-like skin when she took my hand. “I don’t want to stay. I am ready to go.”

It was as if she’d reached into my chest and torn out my heart. The pain was staggering. I couldn’t get to my feet fast enough. I couldn’t move away far enough.

“
Tessa…”

I didn’t stop. Like a coward, I fled.

****

At 8:45, in Grandma Lou’s prehistoric 1957 Chevy Bel-Air, I pulled into an empty spot across from a brightly lit cafe. Loopy letters on the bay window labeled it The Corner. I killed the engine, pocketed the keys and climbed out, my stomach twisting in unnatural ways.

My sneakers crunched on wet pavement as I jogged across the deserted street. A breeze carrying the late scent of rain swept around me, blowing tendrils of dark copper across my face. I shook my head, throwing the strands back over my shoulder. I reached the glass door and swung it open.

The heavy scent of coffee, pastries and pine cleaner swirled around me. The alluring fragrance poured into my lungs, injected into my weary system. My lashes closed as I basked in the stuff before I opened them again and focused on the room at large.

It was spacious with a scatter of square tables in soft, lemon-meringue yellow. A U-shaped counter took up most of the left corner. A pimply boy stood behind it, half asleep on his feet. He perked when I stepped inside. Aside from the pair of us, there were no other customers. My heart sank a little; I’d been hoping Kieran would already be there.

I claimed a corner table overlooking the door and waited, and while I waited, I second guessed myself.

It wasn’t right, I knew that. I knew grandma had already lived her life, had raised a kid and had watched as he’d had his own kid. She had lived to see everyone in her family die. Had watched her granddaughter — my mother — fail at life. Had watched me be born. She no longer had anything else to live for really. But she had me, didn’t she? Wasn’t that reason enough to live a little longer? I was only seventeen. I had no idea what was going to happen if she left before I turned eighteen. And maybe it was selfish, but I didn’t want to be alone. I didn’t want her to die.

“
Tessa?” Low and husky, my name poured over me like liquid honey.

A warm shiver caressed my spine, stealing my breath. My head jerked up, my eyes wide.

Rows of straight, white teeth gleamed as firm lips bowed into an irresistible grin. The soft lights painted over sharp cheekbones, a square jaw and a crooked nose that would have seemed odd on any other face, but somehow managed to give this one a reckless appearance. A large hand lifted and swept back thick, dark fringes from eyes so pale, they could have been white. The soft material of his black shirt stretched with the fluid motion, straining over a broad chest. His free hand remained tucked into the pocket of his black jeans. He looked nothing like I’d imagined. I wasn’t even sure my imagination was creative enough to imagine someone like him. He was just too gorgeous, too beautiful, too… dangerous to be real.

“
You’re Kieran?” My hands flew up to my gapping mouth, horrified. “That was rude! I’m so sorry!”

He shrugged wide shoulders. “No worries. Apparently I sound taller on the phone. It throws people off.”

His six feet was tall enough, in my opinion.

“
I just wasn’t expecting you to be so…” Why couldn’t I shut up?

One thick, dark eyebrow lifted. “So… charming? Handsome… sexy?” The last part was said with a sly wiggle of his eyebrows.

Embarrassment burned my cheeks. “Young.” He didn’t look a day over eighteen.

His grin was devastating. “I’m an old soul.” His gaze burned into mine as he took in my face. I was suddenly aware of every flaw, every blemish on my pale skin, my freckles, my red hair, my green eyes that were just a little too wide for the contours of my oval face. Then there was the zit on my chin that I’d been picking at all morning. I was sure it was as red and swollen as Rudolph’s nose and equally impossible to miss.

“
You are Tessa, right?” he asked.

I pulled my thoughts together, mentally shaking my head and dismantling the fog settling heavily over my brain. “I’m sorry. Yes. I’m Tessa.”

A large palm with long fingers was extended to me from across the table. “Kieran Krause.”

I hesitated long enough to inconspicuously wipe my palm on my thighs, leaving sweat stains on my jeans. Slowly, I slipped my hand into his, watching, mesmerized as his fingers coiled around mine, swallowing my hand entirely.

His touch was raw electric flames searing up my arm. I gasped at the sheer intensity that threatened to consume me.

But far too quickly, he let go, jerking a nod to the chair across from me. “May I?”

“
Oh!” I stuffed my tingling hand into my lap. “I’m sorry! Yes. Please.”

The chair legs squealed against the checkered linoleum as he dragged it back. I watched him fold his tall frame into the seat. He passed another hand through his hair. The strands swept back from his prominent brow and just as quickly flopped back into place when he released. Something silver glinted around his right wrist.

“
I’m epileptic,” he said, catching me staring at his medical bracelet.

I quickly dropped my gaze to the table. “I’m sorry.”

He leaned back in his seat. “As you should be. It is all your fault after all.”

It took me a moment to realize he was teasing me. Fingers of heat crept into my cheeks. My lips twitched, but I couldn’t think of anything to say. I watched his fingers drum on the surface between us, nails jagged, bitten to the quick and crusted with blood. I glanced down at my own deformed nails and almost laughed at the similarity.

“
So, Tammy gave you my number?” He broke the silence.

I nodded. “I asked how her mom got rid of the cancer so quickly and she gave me your card,” I explained.

His head bobbed slowly. “What did she tell you?”

My shoulder jerked in a shrug. “Only that you helped. That you removed the cancer.”

His hand lifted. The bracelet gleamed as it caught the light. He picked at his thumbnail with his teeth. He seemed to realize what he was doing and quickly stuffed both hands under the table. His gaze flittered away from mine. A faint flush darkened his cheeks.

“
I do that, too,” I whispered, not sure why — maybe because I didn’t want him to be embarrassed. I lifted a hand to show my butchered nails.

The corner of his mouth twisted upwards. “Not the worst habit to fall victim to, I suppose.” He became serious. “Did she tell you how it works?”

“
Only that you help… for a price.”

“
My price isn’t for everyone,” he said.

“
I’ll pay it!” I said at once. “Whatever it is.”

Slow deliberation narrowed his eyes and I wondered if it was wise to let him see just how desperate I was.

“
Who is it?”

“
Pardon?”

He folded his arms over his chest. “The person you’re trying to help. Who is it?”

I bit my lip, eyes falling to the table. “My great-grandmother.”

His eyebrows flickered up in surprise. “What does she have?”

I shook my head. “She doesn’t have anything. She’s almost a hundred years old.”

He seemed to hesitate before saying, “You know I can’t stop death, right?”

Anxiety twisted knots inside me. “You helped Tammy’s mom. She was dying.”

“
That was different.” He shifted forward in his seat, dropping his voice so as not to be heard by the boy reading behind the counter. “I can cure most diseases, mend the odd broken bone, patch up a bruise or scrape, but I can’t actually stop the person from aging.”

“
How are you able to do what you do?” I asked.

He drew back. “It’s just something I’ve always been able to do. I can’t explain it. But I do know that what you’re asking… I can’t.”

“
Can you at least try… please?” My voice hitched. Hot tears threatened to spill. “I’ll pay you! Just… try!”

He sighed, combing his fingers through his hair. “I can’t promise—” His palm came up when I opened my mouth to speak. His pale eyes bore into mine. “I need you to really hear me, okay?”

I nodded, hope boiling up inside me like a dame ready to explode. He must have seen it in my eyes, because he groaned, rubbing a hand over his face.

“
Tessa,” he said slowly, carefully, like someone afraid of breaking a child’s heart. “I can’t stop your grandma from dying, do you understand? I can’t stop that. But I can take away any pain she may be having, make the passing… smoother.”

That wasn’t what I wanted! Yes, I wanted her not to be in pain. Yes, I wanted her to go comfortably. But I wanted her to live! Then a thought occurred to me; it was the pain that kept her bedridden. It was the pain that made her weak. Maybe if she wasn’t in pain, she’d get better.

“
Okay!” I said, focusing on Kieran once more. “Take her pain away.”

His eyes narrowed warily. “You understand that I can’t keep her from dying, right?”

I nodded. “I understand, but maybe once the pain is gone, she’ll be okay.”

His teeth flashed in a wince. “Tessa—”

I shook my head. “I get it! It’s not guaranteed, but I want to try. Even if it doesn’t work and she passes anyway, at least…” I swallowed the lump in my throat. “At least she won’t have been in pain.”

He was watching me with an odd expression on his face when I glanced up. It was the look of someone who didn’t quite understand what they were facing, like he wasn’t sure if it would bite him or not. I tried not to fidget under the bold scrutiny.

“
Will you do it?” I asked, breaking the silence when it became apparent that he wouldn’t.

After a minute of hesitation, he gave a short nod. “But I get half my payment up front.”

Ice-cold dread lurched in the pit of my stomach. I willed myself not panic, not to kick myself for never asking what his asking price was. I didn’t have very much money. Most of what we did have was spent on gram’s medication, hospital and private nurse bills, but I’d been saving every penny I made working odd jobs over the summers since I was fifteen. There wasn’t much in the tin can I kept under my mattress, but I would somehow get what he was asking.

I dampened my lips. “Wha—what do you want?”

He was staring again, no longer with curiosity, but with a hunger so bright the heat of it lashed against me. My chest tightened as I met his eyes, saw the predator behind them, watching me, caressing every inch of me. Coils of fire laced through my veins, paralyzing me. He slipped forward. His chair creaked as he folded his arms on the table. The scent of fresh rain, mint and grass washed over me. His eyes, I realized, were the pale blue of the arctic. His lips parted and I held my breath.

“
I want one night with you.”

****

He walked me to the car ten minutes later, our combined footfalls echoing in the muggy twilight. My keys jingled between my numb fingers.

“
I want one night with you.” My stomach muscles clenched every time his words looped through my head.

Did he mean sex? I wanted to ask. I should have asked. But it was such a shock. Things like that didn’t happen outside of movies. People didn’t actually use sex as payment, did they? Or was I really that naive?

We stopped next to gram’s car. I couldn’t look at him. The light from the streetlamp glinted off the keys. I watched the spark trace the curve of a T-shaped keychain.

I moistened my lips, my insides in chaos. “When—when did you…?”

“
I could pick you up tomorrow,” he said, thankfully not making me finish. “Is that okay?”

No! I wanted to shout. It was not okay. How could he think it was okay? How could he think this was normal? But I’d promised. I promised that I would do whatever he wanted, that I would give anything he wanted. God, how was I supposed to know that he would want that?

“
Tomorrow is fine.” My voice hitched. Tears sprung to my eyes.

Damn it!

“
Seven?”

I just nodded, turning away, fumbling with the keys, too blinded, too shaken by emotions to find the keyhole. Fear of breaking down right there had me scrambling faster for escape.

“
Hey.” His warm fingers closed over my icy ones. “You okay?”

I willed myself to calm down, to block the terror encasing me. “Fine.” I lied, staring transfixed by how easily his hand dwarfed mine. “I just need to get home.”

He didn’t stop me when I snatched my hand back from him. He didn’t speak when I threw myself into the car. He didn’t move when I tore out of there.

****

I didn’t sleep that night. When I wasn’t pacing, I was tossing and turning. Again-and-again I told myself it wasn’t too late to back down. That I could. But then I would hear the steady beep of grandma’s heart monitor and I knew I wouldn’t. I had to do this. I had to follow through.