Miles Apart (The Not So Bad Boys of Rock Book 2) (13 page)

“That’s
not fair, Brooke! We would have been together if you’d never left in the first
place. I wanted you there with me.” His face contorted in anger. “You left
me
.”
He jabbed his finger into his chest. “I would have been there for you. Hell,
I’m here now! No matter what I do it’s never enough. I’m doing all the work
these days and it’s still not enough. I don’t know if I can do this anymore.”

I
watched him struggle. I saw the pain in his face. The pleading in his eyes. And
I didn’t care. All I heard was that he still blamed me for choosing my job. I
had done this to us.

This
was all my fault.

So
I made a decision.

“Then
don’t.” I whispered.

“What?”
His hands fell to his side.

“Let’s
not do this anymore.
I
can’t do this anymore.” I croaked.

“What
are you saying, Brooke?” He walked over and knelt in front of me.

“I
guess that I’m saying it’s over. I’m tired of hurting you, and myself.”

“You
don’t mean that. Take it back.” He stood and stumbled backwards.

“I’m
sorry, but I won’t spend the rest of my life being blamed for the choices that
I’ve made. That will only drive us further apart. Please, just leave.”

“Don’t
do this, please. I don’t blame you. Brooke?” He pleaded.

“Yes
you do. You just don’t realize it.” I reached for his hand. “I need you to know
that I loved you. I still love you. But I can’t be the person you need me to
be. I don’t want to be that person. I can’t give up my dreams just because you're
afraid of them. That’s not fair to either of us.” I kissed him softly on the
lips. “Please don’t hate me.”

The
stern set of his jaw indicated his anger as he bent to retrieve his jacket and
walked out the door without looking back. I stared at the door as the reality
of what I’d just done sank in. I had just told the man I loved that it was
over. I'd thrown him out of my apartment.

Out
of my life.

I
threw open the door but he was already gone. I heard a loud crash as the door
at the bottom of the landing was thrown open.

I
shut the door, hearing the discernible click of the latch catching. I heard my
heartbeat, thumping loudly in my ears. The noise was so loud I threw my hands
over my ears, trying to block it out. But it was no use. It wasn't some
external force that was trying to break me. It was coming from deep within, and
it was in response to the pain I'd just created.

I
looked over and saw the multitude of flowers. They taunted me from every corner
of the room. I ran over, grabbing the first vase, and hurled it against the
wall. Water and rose petals went everywhere. It felt good to be destructive. I
grabbed the next one and showed it the same attention. More destruction. Before
long, I was surrounded by broken glass and red petals. I went around, grabbing
each candle, and threw them into the sink, covering them with water. I sank
against the refrigerator and slid down to the floor. My teeth chattered as I fought
to suppress the dam threatening to burst from within. I hugged my knees to my
chest and rocked back and forth, letting everything out.

Sometime later, I opened
my eyes
and discovered that I was lying on the kitchen floor. The room was dark, and I
was cold. I pulled myself up and stepped out into the living room. Everywhere I
looked was covered in glass, water, and rose petals. I tentatively made my way
through the mess and down the hall. What I found in the bedroom only made the
ache cut deeper. Next to the bed was a larger bouquet of roses and a card. A
beautifully wrapped present was propped against my pillow. I opened the card,
not sure that I was ready to read it. The front of it showed a photo of a young
woman being carried on the back of a man as they walked down the beach. The
inside was filled with Sebastian’s scripted handwriting.

Brooke,

I’ve
loved you from the very first moment I laid eyes on you.

You
stole my heart and I never once thought of asking for it back.

I’ve
waited my whole life for someone that made me feel the way you do. I want to
spend the rest of my life showing you how much you mean to me, and will try my very
best to make you as happy as you make me.

I
would, and will, do anything for you. I would give you anything you ask for.
And I would give up my dreams for you, if that’s what made you happy.

Whatever
you need, I will give it to you.

I
love you today, and I will love you always.

Till
death do us part. I am yours forever.

I
love you, Brooke.

Always,
Sebastian

I
wiped angrily at the tears rolling down my face before turning to tackle the
gift wrap. What I saw when I looked inside took my breath away. It was an
exquisite silver picture frame, and on the bottom was written “Our Wedding
Day.” Inside was a glossy print of us, our favorite photo, and beside it was a
small note that read
“I look forward to filling this with our wedding photo.
I can’t wait to marry you baby.”

I
dropped the frame back onto the bed and slid down to the floor. What had I
done? I couldn’t deal with this. I needed to get away. I picked up the phone
and called the one person I knew could help me.

“Hello
Brooke. Is everything okay?” He asked.

“No,
Max, it’s not okay. I need your help.” I poured out my heart, struggling to get
the words out through the tears.

“How
soon can you get to the airport? I can have a plane ready to go in three
hours.” He offered.

“I
can be there. Thank you, again. I’m sorry that I always seem to run to you when
I’m in trouble.” I sniffed.

“Now
dear, don’t be sorry. I’m glad that you feel you can come to me. I’m always
here for you. Brooke, I’m not sure what will happen with you and Sebastian, but
please don’t give up hope. That young man loves you.”

“I
know. I love him too. I’m just not sure that’s enough anymore.”

“Good
luck sweetheart. I’ll see to it that things are taken care of in London. I hope
that your time with Jade helps.” He encouraged.

“Thank
you. I’ll call you soon.” I hung up and began to pack as I called Jade.

“Jade?”
I whispered. “Can I come stay with you for a few days?” I burst into tears at
the sound of her voice.

“Brooke,
sweetie, of course. What’s wrong?” Her voice was full of concern.

“I
just broke up with Sebastian. Oh God Jade, what have I done?”

“Come
home. You can tell me all about it then. I love you girl. Just come home. I’ll
pick you up at the airport.”

“I’ll
text you the details once I’m on the plane. I love you too.”

As I settled into
the seat on the plane I
felt the weight of the day take over me. The flight attendant came up and
informed me that we’d be arriving at LAX in just under twelve hours.

“Thanks.
I think I’m just going to sleep most of the flight.”

“Of
course Ms. Caldwell. Once the captain gives the okay you can head back to the
bedroom for some privacy. I think you’ll be much more comfortable there.” She
gave me a look of understanding. I’m sure that my appearance gave something
away. I’d caught a brief glimpse of my reflection as I had finished up in the
restroom. My eyes were swollen and my face was puffy with red blotches.

“Thank
you.” I gave a small smile and closed my eyes.

Soon
the plane was in the air, and before long the kind attendant patted my arm and
told me I could head back to the bedroom.

I
crawled beneath the covers, pulling them completely over my head, and tried
like hell to pretend that the whole day had just been a really bad dream. No
matter how many times I told myself that, it wouldn’t sink in.

It
was real.

And
it had happened.

Now
I just had to figure out how to keep breathing without it hurting so badly.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Sebastian~

I must have walked for hours, just wandering
around London. I was barely aware of my surroundings. I couldn’t grasp the
reality of what had just happened between us. She had ended it. With just a few
words she’d cut my heart out. Yep, I’d left it laying right there on her living
room floor. Without her, I was empty. I wasn’t sure how to go on. I didn’t even
know if it was possible. Maybe she just needed some time to calm down. I
decided to give her that time, but I would be back in the morning. I would
fight for her. No, I
had
to fight for her.

I
made it back to the hotel and managed to grab an hour of sleep before showering
and grabbing a cab back to Brooke’s. I wasn’t sure if she would talk to me, but
I had to try. I needed to convince her that our love was worth fighting for. I
needed her to know that I would do whatever it took to hold on to what we had.
Even though things had been hard for us lately, I believed that we had what it
took to get through it.

The
cab pulled up in front of her building and I paid him, giving him a little
extra to wait for me, just in case. I jogged up the steps, my legs feeling
heavier as each step brought me closer to her door.

I
knocked softly and waited. No answer. I knocked again, and called her name. I waited
another minute. I banged on the door, saying her name louder this time.

“Brooke!
Baby, please let me in. I have to talk to you. I love you. Please, please talk
to me.” I sank my forehead against the door, feeling defeated.

“She’s
not there.” I heard a male voice behind me. Shit, Reid. I groaned at the irony.
Last night I was all hard and full of fight. Today, I was a broken mess.

“Where
is she?” I slowly turned to face him. My lip was split and swollen, but his
face was a wreck. I grimaced at the sight of what I’d done. “Man, I’m really
sorry about doing that to you. I just lost my head.”

“Is
that all it was? You sure that’s not just a side that you’ve managed to keep
hidden from Brooke?”

“No!”
I growled. “That’s not who I am. Man, how would you feel? I’m in love with her.
I was going to propose to her and then she ended up moving here. Then, things
have been rough for us, being apart. I came here last night to finally ask her
to marry me and I find her kissing you.”

“I’m
sorry about that. But, you didn’t see her kissing me. I was kissing her. I’m
crazy about her.” He stepped closer to me.

“She’s
easy to love.” I remained guarded as he continued to move closer.

“Yeah,”
he grunted. “She really is. She’s in love with you though.”

“I’m
not sure that’s enough for her anymore.”

He
stared at me for a long time, as if analyzing my true intentions. Maybe this
guy wasn’t so bad after all. Maybe I had judged him too harshly. Sure, he had a
crush on the woman that I loved, but he did appear to have her best interest at
heart.

“She
left late last night. I heard movement out in the hall and cracked the door
open just in time to catch her dragging a suitcase down the stairs. She got
into a cab and drove off sometime around two this morning.” He said,
despondently.

“Thanks,
man. I meant what I said. I’m really sorry about everything. I guess I should
thank you for looking out for her. I’m just sorry I haven’t been here for her.”

“Listen,
yesterday was pretty bad for her. I take it something bad happened between you
two last night. Yesterday afternoon her dad was dining in her restaurant. They
spotted one another and then he went to her office and tried to talk with her.
The whole thing shook her up pretty badly. We went out to a pub and she had
quite a few beers, so did I. She cried and I comforted her. I think that’s why
she let me kiss her. She was vulnerable and I took advantage of that. I’m not
such a great guy after all.” He leaned back against the wall, his eyes never
leaving mine.

“Yeah,
she mentioned briefly that she’d seen him. Oh man, that had to be rough for
her. After all this time. What the hell did he expect of her after thirteen
years?” I leaned on the wall opposite him, hands jammed deep in my pockets.

“Look,
I know I haven’t known her as long as you but I have learned one thing during
my short time. Give her a few days to cool down. For what it’s worth, I think
she deserves that much.”

“Yeah.
You’re right, she does.” I pushed off the wall with the heel of my boot and
crossed the distance between us. “I’m gonna head out. For what it’s worth, I
heard everything, and I appreciate you sharing it with me.” We shook hands and
I went on my way. When I stepped outside, I saw that the cabbie was still
waiting.

“Hey
man, thanks for sticking around. You can head back to the hotel.” I turned and
stared out the window, wondering where Brooke had headed, knowing in my heart
that she was probably going home to Jade. I wasn’t sure what I could handle
right now, but being with the guys was not one of them. We pulled up in front
of the hotel and I asked him to wait ten minutes and I would be back down.

I
took the stairs up to the eighth floor, figuring it was the best way to avoid
running into the guys. I grabbed my suitcase, having never unpacked it, and
stepped back onto the busy sidewalk. I climbed back in the cab and shut the
door.

“I’d
like to go one more place, please.” I told him where to drop me and settled
into my seat for the long ride.

“No
problem.” He responded with a head nod.

“Thanks.”
I rubbed my eyelids with my fingertips. Lack of sleep was beginning to make
them feel heavy.

“Everything
okay with you? You look like you've got something heavy on your mind. That
apartment we went to. Your girl live there?” He looked at me through the
rearview mirror. I waited a moment before responding.

“Yeah.
She did. I mean, she does.”

“You
two have a falling out or something? I don’t mean to pry, you just look so
sad.”

“What’s
your name?” I asked.

“James.”
He smiled. “Yours?”

“Sebastian.”
I returned his smile and he nodded. “You ever been in love, James?”

“Yes,”
he smiled broadly. The way his eyes lit up made me laugh silently. “I’m going
to propose. I’ve been working extra shifts to save up for a ring. The extra
tips from you today will help get me closer. Thank you.”

“That’s
really great. How long have you two been together?”

“Two
years, three months, and thirteen days.” He answered, quickly.

“Wow,
someone’s been keeping track.” I laughed.

“Well,
my girl says that we need to refrain from sex until we’re married. I don’t mind
waiting, she’s worth it. But after a while the days begin to wear on you.” He
snorted, loudly.

Before
I knew it, we pulled up in front my destination. Our time together had finally
come to an end. He’d been a really nice guy. I wished him all the best and
thanked him for spending the day with me. I reached down into my pocket and
pulled out the small box I’d been carrying around for the past two months. I
palmed it, opening it once more to run my finger over the setting. I’d had it
made especially for her, knowing she would love it. I’d never had the chance to
place it on her finger, and now I never would. I closed the lid and took a deep
breath, letting it out slowly.

“James,
I want you to have this. Go and get your girl. I wish you all the happiness in
the world. Don’t let her go, man. Whatever you do, don’t let her go.” I dropped
the box into his open palm and stepped out of the car one last time.

“Sebastian,
wait!” I heard him call after me. I looked over my shoulder and threw my hand
up in a parting wave, giving him a wink before I stepped through the sliding
doors and up to the counter.

“May
I help you sir?” The petite woman greeted me.

“Yes,
I’d like a one-way ticket to Los Angeles, on the soonest flight you have,
please.”

“We
have a plane leaving in thirty minutes.”

“I’ll
take it.” I replied, handing her my credit card.

“Do
you have any luggage to check?” She asked, swiping my card through the card
reader.

“No,
just this carry-on.”

“Here
you go Mr. Miles. Have a wonderful flight.” She smiled warmly as she handed me
my boarding pass.

“Thank
you.” I mumbled, before making my way through the busy airport. I pulled out my
phone and called Travis.

“What’s
up? I thought I wouldn’t be hearing from you until tomorrow. So tell me all
about it.” He asked, cheerfully. I cringed inwardly.

“Well,
if I told you that I was at the airport would that give you a clue?”

“What?
Where are you going? You’re not eloping are you? Mom will have a cow if she
doesn’t get to see you in a tux. She hasn’t quite met her tear-quota for seeing
all of her precious children get married.” He chuckled.

“No,
stop.” I winced. “I’m not eloping. I’m not even getting married. I’m just
leaving.”

“What?
Wait a minute? What happened? Where are you going? What about the tour?” Every
question he threw at me hit hard, like knives coming through the phone.

“She
broke up with me, Trav. I saw her kissing another guy and there was a
fight…then she lost it and told me it was over. I went back to see her this
morning, to try and work it out, but she was gone. Apparently she left the
country last night. I don’t know what to do man.” I choked up, but tried to
keep it together. “I can’t go back there. You have to get Davis to cancel the
London shows. I need some time away. I can’t do it. Please, don’t ask me to
come back. Not now. I’ll be okay for the stops in the U.S. I just need a few
days.”

“Where
will you go?” He whispered.

“Home.
I’m going home Trav.”

“To
L.A.?”

“No.
I’m going to Manhattan Beach.” I declared.

“To
Mom and Dad.” He replied.

“Yeah.
To Mom and Dad.”

“Good
choice. I’m sorry about this. I love you little brother.”

“Love
you too, brother. See you soon.” I clicked off the call and tucked the phone
back in my pocket.

The
next eleven hours were a blur.