Mirage (12 page)

“Uhhh, did you forget about me?” Kylee asks walking towards the freezer.

“Oh no you don’t. Sorry love, remember the rules. You begged me to come with you, I agreed on one condition. What was that condition Kylee?” I question.

“You’re drinking and I’m driving,” she whines in a voice similar to a three year old.

“Now that we have that out of the way, we should go. I don’t want to be there all night,” I say as I grab my clutch from the counter and walk out the door.

The drive wasn’t too bad. The clubhouse was in Detroit, but not downtown. It only took about 15 minutes to get there since Kylee thinks speed limit signs are mere guiding tools instead of laws. She is adamant they are more of a guiding tool than an actual law. I’m sure that Kylee thinks the points on her driver’s license are like gold stars in school, too.

Skylar had given Kylee the directions to the clubhouse, but looking around, there didn’t appear to be much of anything here. The street that Kylee’s GPS said the clubhouse was on was a dark and deserted commercial road. There were factories and warehouses. I didn’t see any cars, any people or hear any music. I don’t even think there are streetlights. Not a safe neighborhood.

As we continue down the abandoned street, looking on buildings for an address, I hear dogs barking and yanking at their chains. If one of these dogs gets out, I’m going to die. I don’t do mean dogs. Cute little ones that go in purses, yes. Big giant ones that want to eat your face off, no thank you. We continue to inch down the street at maybe five miles per hour.

“You have reached your destination,” Kylee’s GPS chimes out.

We both look at each other. This can’t be right. Just as Kylee was digging through her purse to find her phone, an all black gate opened. The gate was probably chain linked but with some sort of black background, blending it in with the surroundings. It was about 8 feet tall and looking up to gauge the height, I noticed barbed wire all around the top.

Oh hell.

A man came over to my side of the car as we pulled towards the gate. He was tall and was wearing a similar vest to the one that Skylar had worn last night. The vest denoted that this tall man’s name was Mex.

Mex leaned his head in the window and looked both of us up and down.

“Here for open night or are you with someone?” he asks. He licks his lips seductively and I get a weird feeling. Not a “oh hey, he’s hot” feeling but an “oh shit, what have I gotten myself into” feeling.

Kylee leans over to my side and looks up at Mex, “ Skylar invited us.”

“Who is Skylar?” Mex asks.

I knew it. We have the wrong place. Great. Shit. Now we’re fucked.

“You have to know Skylar. He has the same kind of vest as you. About six feet, dark hair and really pretty blue eyes,” Kylee says hoping the man knows who she was talking about.

“You mean Axe?” Mex says with a little chuckle.

I hadn’t heard that name in forever. Danny told me a story one time about Skylar’s uncle. I guess he was some kind of biker too, the one that brought us to a clubhouse when we were juniors. He never referred to Danny and Skylar by their actual names; just called them Axe and Smash. It had something to do with a story from when they were just boys.

“Yes Axe is who we’re looking for,” I chime in, knowing one hundred percent that we are talking about the same person.

“Pull on in. Park there, near the back and I’ll meet you there. If Axe invited you, I wouldn’t want anyone else to try to get a piece. Axe isn’t the nicest guy, if you know what I mean,” Mex says.

Skylar not a nice guy? I wonder what this guy has been up to for the last year.

We pull in the spot that Mex suggests and as get out of the car, he’s jogging towards us. He stops about ten feet from the car and nods his head towards the entrance. I assume he wants us to follow because right after the nod, he starts to walk to the door. We follow him, not knowing what we’re walking into.

As we get closer to the door, I can hear the music. Once the outer door opens, the music is a lot louder and I can actually make out the song. Rob Zombie for sure, I think to myself. Feeling a little more in my comfort zone than I was last night at the bar with the hip-hop music, I think this night might not suck. Our bags are checked and our phones are confiscated at the door.

“What’s going on? Why did he take my phone?” I ask Mex.

“You’re a civilian and you can’t have phones in the clubhouse. You can have them back when you leave. You can take your bag in with you since you don’t have any weapons or any ties to other clubs,” Mex explains likes it’s the most natural thing in the world.

The second set of doors opens and I’m hit in the face with loud speakers, scantly clad dressed women, and men sitting around in vests joking and laughing. Moving into the bar, I notice Skylar sitting at the bar with a woman who is all but crawled up in his lap. I swallow the lump in my throat and try to banish the feelings of what I can only assume is jealousy coursing through my veins.

Looking back at Kylee, and already knows.

“I’ll go get your drink, don’t worry. Cotton Candy and Sprite?” she asks.

“Nope, I’m going hard tonight. Jack and Coke please,” I respond.

Her eyes get big but then she brushes it off. She had to know that Skylar and I were not on good terms because I had never been anything less than happy to see him. Truth be told, I always loved hanging out with Skylar. He was always a blast. He didn’t mind when I would call him late at night with stupid questions about schoolwork or ask him to go places with me when I knew Danny wouldn’t. He was a good man.

“Maybe the wrong man died that night”
Played back in my head. How could I have said that to him? What kind of monster am I?

Kylee returns with my drink and we find an open table near the DJ booth. There isn’t anyone on the dance floor though, which I find weird. A stripper pole and stage are right across from our table and there is nobody on there either. It was barely nine so maybe it would liven up soon, I hope. As I start to sip on my drink, Skylar comes over to our table.

“Hey Kylee. Mira. Glad you guys could make it out tonight. I know it’s a little dead in here but it will get packed in a couple hours. I invited you down early so we could catch up,” he says scooting in the booth beside me.

Just being within arms reach of Skylar sets my skin on fire. He places his hand down on the seat between our legs and his finger brushes against my exposed thigh. Slamming my drink in one large gulp, I get the attention of both Skylar and Kylee. I ask if he would move to let me out to get another drink.

“I got it,” Kylee says, “You guys catch up while I’m gone.”

Fuck.

I was wishing that Skylar would change spots in the booth and move to the other side, but he instead he moves closer to me. He leans in, our foreheads almost touch and he smiles.

“I think it’s high time we talk, don’t you Mira?”

“Wh- What do we need to talk about?” I think I ask aloud. When he chuckles, I knew he had heard me.

“Not here, sweets. I am glad you decided to come tonight. When Kylee said she was going to bring you, I was a little nervous. I haven’t seen you in so long and didn’t know if you would even speak to me after the way I acted. But I’m still glad you came.”

That’s right. There was something I was pissed off about. Heather. That whore he fucked the night we were together. No fucking respect for me, I think to myself.

“Ya know Sky. I just want to be friends again. I got my taste and it wasn’t anything special, so if you don’t mind, please ask your DJ to play something a little more upbeat so I can dance,” I say rolling my eyes.

Kylee comes walking back to the table and Skylar straightens himself in the seat, takes one look at me and leaves to talk to the DJ. Perfect timing. Looking at Kylee, she has two drinks in her hand and a shot nestled between her tits.

“Kylee, you’re not drinking remember,” I say, frustrated that she cannot ever listen to me.

“I’m not, these are for you. After that last drink, I knew you would need a constant flow and this is the next best thing to a whiskey IV,” she jokes.

Taking the shot out of her cleavage, she hands it to me and I throw it back like a champ. Tequilla, shit. Oh well, we’re on a roll, no stopping now. I take one of the drinks, still Jack and Coke and down that as well. I slam the glass back on the table, wipe the extra booze from my chin and go for the final drink. Kylee stops me.

“Slow down honey. This isn’t a marathon,” Kylee says looking worried. I have never been a huge drinker but when I was drunk, I was either a blast in a glass or a cunt. I was aiming for cunt tonight.

“Ky, I got this. You’re sober. You will make sure I make it home in one piece. You will feed me toast in the morning,” I say smiling and take the glass forcefully from her hands.

“This one’s on you babe,” Kylee says getting up from the table as less angry music comes on. While I drink the rest of the liquid from the glass, Kylee stands in front of me gently rocking her hips to the beat. I know she wants to dance. Dancing is what I wanted and dancing is what I’ll do.

I get up from the table and it seems like all the booze hits me all at once. I feel lightheaded and wobbly. I grab the edge of the table for support. Once I get my bearings, I kick off my wedge sandals and head to the dance floor. Yes I took off my shoes. I will not break my neck while trying to dance.

Listening to Fall Out Boy sing about going down swinging, I think the song fits my mood just right. If I’m going to get locked into Skylar’s mess again, I’m not going down without a fight. I hop around the dance floor with Kylee acting dumb and being free from all feeling. The whiskey is doing its job, thank God. Not only is my heart currently numb, so is my face.

One song bled into the next. Still dancing around, not so much bouncing anymore, I am having a difficult time keeping my balance. I realize what song is playing. I totally love this song. I used to dance around to it all the time. Nine Days were singing about a story of a girl.

Not even needing to see him, I feel Skylar come up behind me and in perfect time with the song he whispers in my ear, “and I absolutely love her.” I turn around to face him and he puts his hand on the back of my hip and slideds his finger underneath the fabric of my tight tank top. The touch of him, skin to skin, is too much. I am mad at him. He hurt me. He broke my heart.

“What the hell are you doing Skylar?”

“I told you I wanted to talk Mira. Do you want to go somewhere a little less noisy and talk? It’s quiet upstairs,” he tells me pointing towards the stairwell.

I agree to go with him. I thought the whiskey and I were going to be good friends tonight, but much like my body and hormones, I am betrayed. Stabbed in the back by whiskey.

We walk up the dark stairwell that opens up into a small kitchen area with booths similar to the ones on the first floor. I look around; it is basically empty except for a young kid behind the bar. He is wearing a vest, but it doesn’t have anything on the back. Behind the kid was a smaller bar, with limited booze on the shelf. I walk over to the kid and ask him for a shot of Jack and he obliges.

“You might want to slow down Mira. I don’t want you throwing up all over the clubhouse,” Skylar says to me as he tries to get the shot from my hand before I toss it back.

“Sky, I have made it the last year of my life without you making my decisions or weighing in your opinion. I’m sure I have this. Please back the hell off,” I say as I toss the shot back. When the liquid finally hits my stomach I realized that maybe I should have listened to Skylar. It hits me like a ton of bricks. I feel a little acid rise from my stomach, but I quickly recover and ask for a glass of coke to ease the burning in my belly.

“Mira, I’m worried about you. You sat here and in a matter of an hour, drank enough to give a grown man a hella buzz. You have to be drunk out of your mind.”

“Drunk yes, Skylar. Drunk out of my mind, no. I haven’t been drunk out of my mind in quite some time,” I respond, slurring my words a little and over annunciating the syllables.

In the six years Skylar has known me, I don’t think he’s ever seen me drunk out of my mind. I think I can count on one hand the times I have been so drunk I thought I was going to die. All but one of those times was when I was in high school, trying to be cool.

Skylar and I sit down at one of the booths and I lean into the cool red plastic covering the seats. The cool feels so good on my overheated body. I really have no idea if I’m so hot because Skylar is so close or from the whiskey pumping through me. I’ll just think it’s the booze to make myself feel better.

“What have you been up to Mira? You look less like yourself and more like someone you’re pretending to be,” Skylar says with his eyes piercing into mine.

“What the fuck does that mean?” I ask. Ah, the cunt is coming out in me after all.

“No need to get defensive Mira, just want to know what you have been up to in the last year.”

“Well Skylar, or should I call you Axe? I wouldn’t want your friends to know your real name since Max didn’t know who the hell Skylar was,” I say.

“Mex. His name is Mex. We don’t really use government names in here. It just makes things easier,” Skylar says chuckling.

“So did Heather scream out Skylar or Axe?”

“I never slept with Heather. I wanted to get a rise out of you. I swear it Mira,” Skylar says apologetically.

“Oh right. You never slept with Heather and I never miscarried our baby.” FUCK.

For the last ten and a half months I have carried this secret. Nobody knew. Not my mom, not Kylee and certainly not Skylar. I never wanted anyone to know. I wanted to take this to my grave.

Skylar looks like he is trying to process the bomb I just dropped in his lap. His eyes are roaming, he’s clenching his fists and gritting his teeth. I see anger flash in his eyes before he takes his closed fists and pounds them on the table, making me jump out of my seat, sobering up real quick.

“What the fuck did you just say Mira?”

Okay. Breathe Mira. You opened this can of worms. Fuck.