Mirror of My Soul (12 page)

When she drove up his driveway, there were about twenty cars there, most of them luxury models. All the lights were on, a welcoming, warm vista. She could easily imagine those elegant cars as a group of carriages a hundred years ago, the same welcoming sense of graciousness projecting from the home, that enduring classiness that Tyler complemented with his own style.

As she got out of the car, she heard the warm chatter of voices and laughter that heralded a party where people were enjoying themselves. From the direction of the sound, it seemed they were outside at the pool house. She imagined that the glass doors had been thrown open so people could wander in and out, enjoy the grounds as they made new friends in an industry where success lay largely in who one knew and

impressed. She had no doubt that Tyler had guests here that could turn an aspiring actress’s or screenwriter’s dreams into reality. He’d likely carefully chosen a handful of talents to be here to take advantage of that opportunity. Being invited to such a party would have been enough to make one of those hopefuls spend a month’s salary on the right outfit and agonize over accessories days before the event.

Moments like that were turning points. Most of them went unnoticed as such until they passed into hindsight. But sometimes, like now, the significance of the moment 60

Mirror of My Soul

was immediately apparent. Something would change forever when the eyes that

mattered fell on you. And in that second the aspiring dreamer knew, in order to give the performance of her life, she couldn’t perform. She had to give a part of herself to her audience and pull them into who she was.

All of Marguerite’s senses were honed for that one person who mattered. As she moved across the lawn, oblivious to the curious looks, the dead physical stop of some of the men she passed, she picked out his voice among the others before she saw him. His polite chuckle. It ran a shiver of pure, hard wanting through her. She actually stopped herself to let her heart rate calm. Goddess, she’d really missed him. She didn’t know if he was an obsession or something more, but she didn’t care. She just needed to be near him, if it was only to sit across a room from him and stare.

He was sitting just inside one of the pool house doors in a deep man-sized wicker chair. His forearm rested along the curved arm, a drink loosely dangled off the end of it in his hand. One ankle crossed over the opposite knee, his favored pose, his khaki slacks casually adjusted. No coat, just a navy blue silk shirt that only enhanced the breadth of his shoulders, the mixture of the dangerous and the aristocratic in his features. With surprise, she noted that he was wearing his wedding ring on his right hand as a widower would. It made her wonder if he normally wore it but took it off when he was at The Zone or with a female houseguest to avoid questions, or perhaps out of respect for his wife. Respect for the oath he had made even if somewhere along the way the reality of it had become something terrible, unexpected.

Otherwise he was the picture of the relaxed and urbane host, the focal point for many of the women she saw milling around. They watched him with surreptitious

glances, gauging their chances for a night or maybe more than a night, or perhaps just fantasizing.

Back off, he’s mine. He said so.
It startled her, coming so abruptly out of her mind and heart. Spoken with the hope of a submissive as well as the absolute certainty of a Mistress. All of it was rolled together into herself. Her. Marguerite. What she wanted.

Still, she stayed where she was, taking this moment to study him without his

knowledge. Each time he lifted his arm to respond in the conversation, she saw down the short shirt sleeve, the soft hairs under his arm, a three or four-inch length of his bare side. The early evening sunlight shone through the shirt, giving her the outline of his upper body, a simple thing that rendered her motionless, unable to breathe.

He was just…gorgeous. Perfect. She wanted his hands on her, his mouth. She

needed him. Now.

He was talking to an intense-looking younger man who’d pulled the ottoman for

the chair just beyond the range of Tyler’s long legs to sit on it. The man was perhaps in his early thirties with brown and black hair streaked with blond, revealing that he spent a good deal of time in the sun. His gray eyes shifted restlessly. She suspected it wasn’t abstract boredom, but because that was his nature. He was not sitting on the ottoman as much as he was perched on it. She also noted that he was dressed more casually than the partygoers, in loose torn jeans and an untucked cotton shirt, only several buttons 61

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fastened. Celtic design tattoos were around his wrists and the suggestion of more body art was shadowed within the folds of the almost open shirt.

His wire-rimmed glasses increased the unusual intensity, but made him more

boyish and sensually appealing at once. The hair was disheveled, carelessly shoved away from his face. That and his clothing gave the impression of having rolled out of bed to come down and join the party. He was beautiful, the kind of man…

His gaze shifted to her and she picked up on it like the scent of a Darjeeling in the mist-covered foothills of India. Someone she would have snapped up in a heartbeat in The Zone. Perhaps even resorted to throwing elbows to get him if need be. This one knew pain, had the look in his eyes combined with the sweet sensual innocence of his mouth that so strongly appealed to her. But she sensed he was also one who had found peace for his demons. The focus of his eyes was unsettling, the way they examined her not exactly sexual but as if he were devouring every feature. It was obvious that he’d recognized her nature in the same blink of time she’d recognized his.

Jesus Christ.
His lips moved in the words, probably said it, but the only voice she could hear was Tyler’s as he broke off and turned to see what had drawn his

companion’s attention so abruptly.

She moved at last, made her way across the thirty feet of lawn left between them.

She didn’t let herself falter though she was afraid, more so with every step. She was about to go somewhere she’d never thought possible, trusting all her dark corners to someone else.

Tyler had given her that, the awareness that there was a black hole slowly

spreading within her that would eventually take away everything she’d built. The things that she’d thought would compensate for the lack of true healing. He wanted her to accept a relationship where she’d have to have the courage to believe the darkest, deepest betrayal would not be lurking around the corner for her again. And there were no guarantees. Remembering her father’s eyes—what they’d once reflected, what they’d become—she faltered.

Tyler rose at the same time as his companion. Without taking his eyes off her, he neatly stepped in front of the gray-eyed man, impeding his forward progress. Pressed his drink into the grinning man’s hand and came toward her.

Tyler couldn’t fault his friend’s reaction. Josh was an artist. How else would an artist react to the ultimate challenge to sculpt? How could you capture a tenth of a goddess’s beauty in clay or bronze, even with hands as masterful as Josh’s?

The people she’d passed when she’d crossed the lawn were openly staring at her.

He was sure they were wondering who she was, how she figured into this group.

Men who dealt regularly with beautiful women had gone stock-still when they saw her, probably not even certain what it was about her that made them want to get on their knees. Josh knew and he knew, but it was more than that for him. He’d felt her tremble beneath his touch, just as he’d seen ugly darkness pour out of her. But still she emanated a mysterious feminine power, something that called to the soul as much as 62

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the cock. Under her touch, a man could find absolute power, torment, or a lust that knew no civilized constraints.

He could tell she’d come for him with a single-minded purpose and she had no

interest or desire to interact with anyone else. The thought made the want that had been branding the inside of his gut for days become raw. He’d missed her to the point there were times he’d felt like a rabid dog. Working out until his muscles were quivering, he’d run along the path by the Gulf until he was so exhausted he could barely make it back home. And still he couldn’t keep himself from going back to the guestroom, stretching out on the sheets and pillow linens he hadn’t permitted Sarah to change so he could breathe in her lingering scents.

She’d piled her hair up on her head, a twist with a silken tail that fanned out over her shoulder and left breast. She’d done that thing that women knew how to do, soft wisps of hair around her temples. No eye makeup, just a pale pink lipstick.

The dress she wore was a creation of soft cream. Sleeveless, a clinging cotton that hugged her body from breast to thigh, baring the points of her finely boned shoulders.

She wasn’t wearing a bra beneath it, her small bosom perfectly molded, the posture of her body showing she was entirely unselfconscious by the stretched fabric, the anatomically specific display of the shape of her breasts, the points of her nipples. Those long, shapely calves were bare, tucked into a pair of strappy-heeled sandals, her pale pink painted toenails matching the long nails of her fingers on her elegant hands. No jewelry, no rings. Just Marguerite.

As he made his way toward her, all the sharp desire of the past two weeks throbbed in him like untreated gunshot wounds. She watched him come, certainly read his desire, his intent, but she showed no fear, no compulsion to retreat.

He caught her shoulders. When her body touched his he almost groaned. Maybe he did. All he knew was he needed her in his arms and his mouth on hers before time could move forward.

The strength in his grip, the passion a living thing in his eyes, made Marguerite tremble, though she managed to keep it inside. Barely. It terrified and exhilarated her at once to know he’d wanted and needed her with the same fierceness. How could

something be so frightening and reassuring at once?

He stared at her a long moment. The intensity of it was enough to have those

around them instinctively giving them space. It didn’t surprise her. Tyler had class in every aspect of his life. He’d tolerate no one in his home lacking it.

When he brought his mouth down on hers, she snaked her hands up the inside of

his arms and curled her hands around his neck. Burying her fingers into his hair at his nape, she brought her body into his, aching, seeking. His mouth held hers with sure possession, almost savage need.

She was sure it was a good thirty seconds before either of them knew or cared that they were not alone. When he raised his head, she noticed the wounds on his face were healing. Still noticeable, but the tape was gone.

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He shifted his glance. “Good Lord, you’ve absolutely frozen the men here. They’re not sure whether they’re supposed to worship you or be terrified.”

“You don’t appear to be terrified.”

He smiled, brought her closer. His voice dropped, his lips pressing to her ear. “I’m better at hiding it.”

“Not as much as you think.” She closed her hands on his forearms. “You’re

shaking.”

“So are you.”

His lips were damp with the touch of hers. “You know,” he said in a soft rumble.

“I’ve watched you take a sub just over the cliff edge of sanity. Hold him there until I couldn’t imagine he wouldn’t snap from the mental strain. But you have that uncanny knack of giving him release a second before he’d completely lose his fucking mind for all time. These last couple days I figured you were trying that out on me.”

Her lips curved because she heard the wry humor. And because it honestly felt

so…good to be standing here. So incredible.

“Was it working?”

His eyes swept heat through her with their look of dangerous purpose. “One more day and I’d decided to storm your place and drag you home with me by your hair like some kind of barbarian.” He wrapped his hand in the tail of hair that fell forward over her shoulder and tugged, his thumb making a discreet caress over her nipple. She emitted a short gasp of reaction before she could stop herself. His eyes darkening, he continued to stroke the hair in his grasp, making that idle pass with his thumb again. “I actually felt it get hard for me,” he murmured. “The moment I touched it.”

“You wouldn’t have gotten past Chloe.” She tried to hold onto her sanity. “And I’ve had the same experience with you. Different body part, though.” She flicked her lashes down, back up.

He smiled, a baring of teeth. Spared a glance at the man he’d left who’d resumed his seat and was watching them with avid interest, that amused look still on his attractive face. “I would have brought ammunition to distract Chloe.”

“He is quite something.” She raised a brow, teasing him, something she’d never contemplated doing before. “I didn’t think your taste in submissives ran to the same gender.”

Tyler chuckled, slid an arm around her, turned them so they were to all

appearances casually strolling back toward his chair, but his fingers played along her hip and the top of her buttock, making her pulse race. “He’s a good friend and a tremendous artist. And—I do underscore this several times for the health and well-being of any Mistress who tries to seduce him—completely unavailable. His wife’s at a medical conference and he decided to spend a few days here until she gets back because he has a show coming up soon. He’s trying to work up a couple additional pieces at the not-so-gentle demand of his dealer. He’s done studio time here before. It’s quiet and I can keep him from going out of his mind, mostly, without Lauren.” Tyler slanted her a 64

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glance. “He’s got somewhat of an uncertain temperament in her absence, given to falling into artistic melancholy, so she likes having me watch over him.

“The reason I suspect he’s staring at you like that and the reason I don’t consider beating him up for it is you walked across the grass and his creative wheels started revving like the legs of the Road Runner in a Bugs Bunny cartoon. And of course he recognized you as a Mistress.”