Miss Klute Is a Hoot! (5 page)

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Authors: Dan Gutman

BOOK: Miss Klute Is a Hoot!
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“Ooooo!”
Ryan said. “Andrea called A.J. a genius. They must be in
love
!”

“When are you gonna get married?” asked Michael.

If those guys weren't my best friends, I would hate them.

A few minutes later, Mr. Macky came back from the teachers' lounge. Emily was with him, eating a hot dog.

“So how are you making out with Miss Klute?” Mr. Macky asked.

“Ewwww! Gross!” we all shouted. “We're not making out with Miss Klute!”

“Arlo had a great idea,” Andrea said. “Go ahead; ask him, Arlo.”

“Mr. Macky, can we take Miss Klute outside for recess?” I asked.

“Gee, I don't know,” Mr. Macky replied. “Miss Klute is trained to be an
indoor
therapy dog.”

“Please please please please please please please please please!”
we all begged.

“I suppose Miss Klute
could
use a little fresh air,” said Mr. Macky. “Well, okay.”

“Yay!”

Like I said, that
please please please
thing works every time. It really
is
a magic word.

Mr. Macky hooked Miss Klute's leash to her collar and said we could take her outside until recess was over.

“Which one of you is the most responsible?” he asked.

“I am!” we all shouted.
*

“It was A.J.'s idea to take Miss Klute outside,” said Michael.

“Okay,” Mr. Macky said, handing me the leash. “Be careful with her.”

“I will,” I promised.

When we got out to the playground, all the other kids came running over.

“Miss Klute is here!” everybody shouted. “Hi Miss Klute!”

It was like she was the queen of the playground. Everybody wanted to pet her and hug her. We walked Miss Klute around and showed her the monkey bars, the swings, and the slide. She looked pretty happy.

“See?” I said. “She
likes
being outside!”

I should get the No Bell Prize for that idea. That's a prize they give out to people who don't have bells.

Miss Klute was pulling at the leash, and I had to run to keep up with her. She was pretty fast for a big dog.

“Hey, maybe we should play fetch,” I said, stopping to catch my breath.

“I don't know if that's a good idea, Arlo,” Andrea said. “Mr. Macky didn't say it
was okay to let Miss Klute run around without holding her leash.”

“He didn't say it
wasn't
okay either,” I told Andrea. “He just said to be careful with her.”

Fetch is a simple game. You throw something, and the dog runs to get it. Then she brings it back and you throw it again. It seems like a pretty dumb game, if you ask me. But I guess playing fetch is like chess for dogs.

There was a tennis ball in the grass. I let go of Miss Klute's leash and threw the ball toward the soccer field.

“Go get it, girl!” I shouted.

Miss Klute took off, running like the wind.

“Look at her go!” Ryan yelled.

It was amazing! Miss Klute chased down the ball and caught it in her mouth even before it stopped bouncing. Then she ran back and dropped the ball at my feet.

“Good girl!” we all said, petting Miss Klute.

She was panting, and her tongue was hanging out.

“Do it again, A.J.!” Neil said.

I threw the ball a little farther this time, and Miss Klute took off after it. Again, she grabbed it in her mouth and brought it back to me. She looked like she wanted me to throw it again, so I did. She dashed off to get it.

“Miss Klute sure likes to run!” shouted Ryan.

“She's having so much fun!” yelled Alexia.

“I think she just wanted to play,” said Michael.

“I've never seen her so happy!” shouted Andrea.

That's when the weirdest thing in the history of the world happened. A squirrel ran out onto the soccer field.

Well, that's not the weird part, because squirrels run out onto soccer fields
all the time. The weird part was what happened
next
.

Miss Klute saw the squirrel run in front of her. I guess that squirrel was a lot more interesting than the tennis ball. So Miss Klute changed direction and ran after the squirrel instead of the ball!

The squirrel must have freaked out when it saw that giant, bear-sized dog chasing it. It changed direction and headed for the woods next to the playground!

Miss Klute followed the squirrel!

The two of them disappeared into the woods!

“Where did she go?” asked Ryan.

I looked at Ryan. Ryan looked at Michael. Michael looked at Alexia. Alexia looked at Neil. Neil looked at Andrea. Andrea looked at me. Then we all looked at the woods.

Miss Klute was
gone
!

“What are we gonna do?” I shouted. “We have to find Miss Klute!”


You
have to find Miss Klute, Arlo,” Andrea said. “You're the one who lost her.”

“Oh, man, you're in trouble, A.J.,” said Ryan. “If Miss Klute doesn't come back, you'll probably be suspended for the rest of your life.”

Hmmm, I thought, trying to figure out if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

“No, they'll probably just lock A.J. up in the dungeon on the third floor,” said Michael.

“I
told
you not to let Miss Klute run around without a leash, Arlo,” Andrea said. “Now she's gone, and it's all
your
fault.”

Every time I do something wrong, Andrea has a little smile on her face. What is her problem?

Riiiiinnnnnggggg!

Oh no! It was the bell. Recess was over.

I looked toward the woods one more time, hoping to see Miss Klute come running out. But she didn't. Everybody went inside the school. I was the last one to come in. Mr. Macky was waiting for me in the hallway.

“Who is holding Miss Klute?” he asked. “Did she like being outside?”

“I guess so,” I told him. “She's still out there, somewhere.”

“What!?”

Mr. Macky's eyes were bugging out of his head like golf balls.

“We were playing fetch,” I explained, “and a squirrel ran by. Miss Klute took off after the squirrel. They both went running into the woods. And that was the last we saw her.”

Mr. Macky looked like one of those cartoon characters who gets really mad and smoke pours out of their ears.

“I told you to take good care of her!” he yelled.

“I did!” I said. “She was having a great time, right up until the moment she ran away.”

“We have to find her!” Mr. Macky said. Then he went running down the hall toward the front office.

A few seconds later, an announcement came over the loudspeaker.

“All students and teachers! Report to the playground immediately! Miss Klute is
missing!”

A second after that, everybody poured out of their classrooms yelling and screaming and freaking out.

“Miss Klute is missing!”

“Where is she?”

“We have to find her!”

What happened next was the biggest manhunt in the history of the world. Or doghunt anyway. The whole school—kids and grown-ups—ran out into the woods by the playground. We were all searching for Miss Klute.

“Yoo-hoo! Miss Klute, where are you?” everybody was shouting.

Mr. Macky was walking around the woods with binoculars. Our security guard, Officer Spence, was searching for clues with a magnifying glass. Our science teacher, Mr. Docker, was wearing night vision goggles. Our art teacher, Ms. Hannah, was putting up
MISSING
posters with Miss Klute's picture on them. Our computer teacher, Mrs. Yonkers, was holding up some weird machine that said
DOG DETECTOR
on it.

Our librarian, Mrs. Roopy, passed out books to all the kids. She told us that if we were reading, Miss Klute might come out of her hiding place.

A few minutes later, a helicopter was hovering overhead. Mrs. Lilly, a reporter from the local newspaper, showed up in a van with a camera crew. She ran over to interview Mr. Macky.

“Why did your therapy dog run away?” asked Mrs. Lilly. “Did you beat her? Did you starve her? Does she have rabies? Did she bite somebody? Are you part of a dogfighting ring? What do you know, and when did you know it? My readers want to know the truth.”

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