Authors: Casey Bryce
She waltzed back gracefully as if moving on a cloud. I blinked, and for the first time, noticed she was wearing a long, black gown that fell past her legs and across the floor. It seemed to slither after her.
She laid the book down on the table and motioned me to her side. I joined her reluctantly, finding myself gazing at two empty pages. I peered up at her questioningly.
“What is it you really want in life?” she asked simply.
I hesitated. “I don’t know. To be a good person. To get to heaven. To be loved?”
Mabel shook her head. “No, no. Anyone can be a good person. And anyone with your loveliness will certainly be loved. What do you
really
want?”
I tried again, twiddling my thumbs as I watched her uncomfortably. “What I want, I suppose, is
true love
.”
The woman looked at me pitiably. “Dear, your naïveté could outshine even Eve’s, but at least you’re getting closer. Remember, to get the big stuff, you first have to start small.”
I stared at her dumbly. “Education? Money?”
“No, this,” she said simply. With a swift thrust of her hand, I felt her cup my right breast. I immediately hunched over and let out a small gasp.
“Now what do you see?”
I didn’t answer; I needed to catch my breath.
“Look at the book,” she repeated firmly.
I flipped my hair back behind me, as if shaking off the doubts I had just seconds earlier.
I did want something
.
I peered down and watched the book, its pages now filled with images moving about like bored koi in a shallow pool. I saw Thad wink at me as his picture crossed over the binding, and then observed Kimberly beckoning me to her side. Clarence appeared lifting weights—of all things—and then Tamara overlapped him, seemingly lost in deep thought. More images materialized, with a ring of attractive students I barely knew parading from page to page. Next came a round of actors, models, professional athletes, even superheroes and world leaders; they all shouted out and beckoned me to join them, and the thought was very appealing. A final image then surfaced…an Asian woman of impossible beauty. Standing like a goddess before a throng of clamoring people, she looked a little like me.
“You have powers you have barely begun to realize,” Mabel whispered as I watched, her fingers running up and down my spine. “You can have anyone, be anyone, trade places with anyone, even live forever in any time, if you choose.”
Her breath was like hot steam against my neck, and I stepped back slightly. “What do you mean?” I asked uncomfortably. “I’m, I’m supposed to rejoin…”
The woman looked at me warily. She almost seemed my age now, even kind of resembled me, and there was an extra bounce to her voice.
“Rejoin? Do you even understand what that really means?”
I fumbled over my words. “Well, I think it means that Keil and I will—”
“Indeed,” she interjected. “But his life was far from glorious. Just the opposite, actually. Why would you ever want to return? And you would lose all the special abilities you are just beginning to uncover.”
“Because he wants me to.”
She rolled her eyes. “Girly, you forget who you both are. When you make a decision, he’s making the decision. If you don’t want to return, you don’t have to.”
I glanced back down at the book, its pages eager to tell my story. Kimberly and Thad were both beckoning me over, their magnetic pull difficult to resist.
“That’s it,” Mabel said. “It just feels right, doesn’t it? Go on.” A finger nudged me forward.
“But,” I protested, freezing in place. “I—I can’t. There are things I need to accomplish.”
“What things?”
“I…don’t know, exactly.”
“And for whom?”
I bit my lip. “I don’t know. For Keil, for mankind. For God.” I didn’t sound very convincing, and Mabel knew she had me flummoxed.
“We’ve already discussed Keil. And as for this higher power you’re so devoted to, where is it? What is it?” She poked me in the chest. “You’re on your own, and you know it. You need to start playing by your own rules. If it feels right, why not just embrace it?”
The conversation had left me exhausted. Everything she said made sense, but I couldn’t stop thinking of Keil’s forlorn, pitiful face.
“Our lives are a network of intertwining strands, and sometimes you must snip one to reach the other,” Mabel said in an even voice, closing the book with a thump. She was almost my mirror image now, with my button nose and earnest voice. She began walking me to the door. “You’re obviously not ready for the next step in your evolution just yet, but when the time comes, I know you will choose what’s best for yourself. Just call my name, and I will come.”
I was standing outside now, watching her slowly close the front door.
“But,” I called, “everything you’ve said, it just seems selfish somehow.”
She smiled at me through the doorway’s final crack of light. “Is looking out for yourself selfish? If you don’t, who will?” And with that, the door sealed.
I stood in stupefied silence, barely registering what had just happened.
“Miyu?”
I turned around to see Tamara run up to me. “The exit’s over here.”
“Are you OK?” I asked, meeting her halfway and clutching her arm.
She looked at me oddly. “Of course I am. These places don’t scare me, you know that. And this one is very lame.”
I gazed at her as a tear rolled unwillingly down my face.
“Hey look, I’m sorry,” she murmured, looking ashamed as she watched the droplet fall to the floor. “I never should have taken you here, and I’m sorry we got separated.”
I nodded listlessly, only half listening to her. Mabel’s words were still floating around in my head.
“Hey,” Tamara said, still regarding me guiltily. “We have plenty of time. How about I treat you to a chocolate shake at that malt shop across the street?”
She took my hand, and I followed her out the exit. Everything was normal again, with kids laughing and running about—but all I could hear was that woman’s voice.
You can have anyone, be anyone, trade places with anyone…
And I began to wonder.
Chapter Twenty-One
D
ays passed, and while life continued as normal, I remained haunted by both Keil’s and Mabel’s words.
When would I reunite with Keil, and what would happen to my current life once I did? Could it be averted? Should it?
My questions only led to more questions.
I headed for my locker and spied Thad spilling some books into his bag. I felt my shoulders tense and my hands squeeze into fists, and I stomped straight up to him. “Thad, why are you being such a snot?”
Bug-eyed, he stared at me.
I tightened my posture and continued. “One moment you’re all nice, and the next moment you treat me like I’m bird poop or something. Why are you acting this way?”
His face grew pale as I waited for a reply. He then swallowed, and I watched his Adam’s apple bob comically up and down like a buoy.
“You really don’t know what happened?” he asked.
I glared at him. “Of course I know. I gave Kimberly CPR. What’s the big deal?”
His eyes narrowed. “The big deal? You were, you became…”
His voice trailed off, and he looked away as if reliving a painful memory.
“What are you talking about?” I growled impatiently.
“Never mind,” he said dismissively, looking like a guilty con man. “I just hate all the attention you got. I should have been the hero.” He then turned on his heels and ran off.
I watched him disappear down the hall. Gritting my teeth, I threw my locker door open against the adjacent door.
What a pig
. I grabbed my things and hurried to class.
“Wish I could teach him a lesson or two,” Tamara said in Literature after I had reenacted the whole scene.
“It is odd, though,” Marlene wondered behind me. “I mean, it’s pretty well known how much he liked you. Guess he just couldn’t stand living in your shadow.” She shrugged. “Oh well, at least now you can focus on one of your many other suitors.”
I looked at them curiously. “Like whom?”
They both stared at me wearily.
“You really are oblivious,” said Marlene.
The day redeemed itself at lunch when to my delight, I discovered another red envelope in my locker. I opened it eagerly.
My eyes shot forward. In my hand was not a poem from an admirer at all, but an invitation to a sleepover—from Kimberly of all people. I hadn’t spoken to her since the day after the accident. Instead we exchanged, at best, awkward glances in the hallways and during class.
I scrutinized the card carefully, paranoid it was a prank. But it seemed legit, the scent of sweet perfume tickling my nose.
“Hi…Miyu,” came a tentative voice. I whirled around to see Kimberly standing right before me.
“Hi Kimberly,” I said, finding it suddenly hard to breathe.
We regarded each other like two estranged sisters who had been separated for years.
Kimberly swallowed, looking at me hesitantly. “Do you think you could come? I haven’t really thanked you properly yet and… and it’ll just be a small thing…for the two of us, only.”
I beheld her in amazement. “I don’t know,” I said truthfully, a touch of sadness in my voice. “I don’t think I should.”
She immediately shut her eyes and turned away. “I—I understand. I just wanted to do something special for you, you know?” She continued to hide her face from me, like a princess abandoned by her champion, and my heart fluttered like a little bird. She seemed so lost, so vulnerable; I couldn’t just walk away. With a resigned sigh, I took her hand and led her into a bathroom. I snatched a paper towel from the wall and began wiping away
the sudden tears dribbling down her cheeks, humming gently as I proceeded.
She laughed awkwardly. “Just like last time,” she sniffled. “You must think I’m a real mess.”
“No, I think you’re very lovely,” I said simply.
I knelt her to the floor and spent the next few minutes touching up her face. I blotted her eyes, made her blow her nose, and then smoothed out her hair. She remained silent the whole time.
“There you go,” I said finally, admiring her with a cheerful smile. “You’re back to your old, immaculate self.”
She looked at me as if I had just saved her life a second time. “Will you please come?” she asked again, her voice somewhere between a whimper and a purr. “Please?”
I bit my lip. “It’s just that, it’s always been so weird between us and my friends, you know?”
“But it doesn’t have to be, not anymore.” Her eyes shimmered.
I smiled shyly at her, my cheeks glowing redder the more she stared.
“So…please?” she asked, clutching my arm.
I closed my eyes and smiled. “How could I say no?”
With a look of delight, she sprang forward and engulfed me in a tremendous hug. I squeaked, and wondered if it were all a dream.
She finally liked me.
I felt as if I were flying as I entered the cafeteria. I saw my table and floated over to it, smiling at my beloved friends.
“What are you so happy about?” Marlene asked with a grin. “You were absolutely miserable a half hour ago.”
“Did one of your admirers finally show himself ?” Ruby asked, looking at me in her usual, dreamy way.
“No,” I replied, squeezing her little cheek. “But I did receive a nice card from somebody. You’ll never guess from whom!”
I skipped around the table as they all stared at me dubiously. I giggled at them and stopped behind June, as if we were in preschool playing a game. No one offered a guess.
“It was Kimberly!” I laughed, clapping as if I had won. “She’s invited me to a sleepover, you know, to thank me and everything.” I sighed. “Deep down, I think she’s actually very sweet.”
Tamara choked on something as the rest of them gaped at me in shock.
June responded first. “Kimberly is so pretty! Do you think she’ll start sitting with us?”
I smiled and ran my fingers through her hair. “You never know. Maybe someday.”
“No,” Marlene said emphatically, her face twisted into a sneer. “She’s rotten to the core, and she’ll never sit here. Ever!”
Her tone was startling, and my face blanched. “She doesn’t have to sit with us,” I insisted quietly. “But she’s not so bad. I think her brush with death has changed her somehow.”