ModelLove (3 page)

He glanced at the clock at his bedside. He should get some
rest so he could be fresh for their day together. He hoped he could sleep.
Never in his life had he looked so forward to sunrise.

For a second time, Ian dried his damp palms on his new black
swim shorts. Now that he was finally on his way to meet Temaru, anticipation
had turned to anxiety. Though, the anxiety had actually returned during the
night. After his talk with Mitch and Rodney, he dozed off for about an hour but
woke up in a sweat, his heart pounding.

The thing was, he didn’t understand why. He hadn’t woken
from a nightmare. He simply woke up with anxiety in his heart. All he could
attribute it to was the thought of doing a shoot, since that’d been the last
thing he’d talked with Mitch and Rodney about before falling asleep. He got out
of bed, knowing he wouldn’t be able to sleep without a little help, and went
out to the kitchen.

Mitch and Rodney had already gone to bed. Jared was still
awake. From the dirty look Jared gave him, he figured the young model wasn’t
interested in hanging out. He didn’t know what he’d done to offend the kid.
Probably just living and being a has-been from the world the guy wanted so
badly to be a part of. He was sure in Jared’s young eyes he was the vision of
pathetic and Jared wouldn’t be entirely wrong in that thought. He had it about
himself more than once in the past few years.

So he didn’t bother to say anything to Jared except “good
night” as he walked from the kitchen back to his bedroom with a six-pack of
beer. He only drank three bottles, enough to relax him, and passed out for the
rest of the night. When he woke up, he was excited the instant his eyes opened,
but it waned as he got ready to meet Temaru.

No matter how immaculate his grooming, he was still only a
shadow of his former self. Working out used to be one of his favorite pastimes.
Swimming, running, lifting weights, he loved the feel of exerting himself. In
the past three years, he only worked out when the guilt of not having done so
compelled him. Afterward he was always so sore, he didn’t even want to think
about doing it again.

His body still had a fair amount of muscle but his pectorals
were much smaller and softer than they’d once been. The rippling abs he had
once been so proud of were now only faint lines. Comparing his body to
Temaru’s, just the thought of taking his shirt off filled him with dread. Which
was why he was wearing a light, airy button-down shirt along with his swim
shorts.

He shook his head as he walked. Guess he was already
starting to feel like a model again, critical as hell of his appearance. Sure,
there were plenty of models who didn’t beat on themselves over their looks.
There was also a reason why eating disorders and Botox existed.

It was a funny thing how many people viewed models as the
upper echelon of beauty, believing how models must be so confident, so happy
with themselves, when for many, it was the exact opposite. Living life in the
public eye, where physical appearance equaled how much success could be gained,
was constant pressure. Maybe that’s really why he’d partied so hard back then,
to escape the endless criticism, from himself and others. If only he’d realized
it then, instead of dragging Aiden down with him.

Ian fought to clear his thoughts and gain some control over
his emotions. He didn’t want to be haunted right now. He wanted for a little
while to forget the past and live in the present again.

As he came closer to the docks, nervousness spurred his
heartbeat into a faster pace. Small, rustic shops lined one side of the
boardwalk and the docks branched off the other. Hanging outside one shop was a
sign with a diving mask and tanks painted on it, words in French and English
that read,
Diving Dreams
.

Ian inhaled a deep breath, held it, exhaled and headed for
the shop. Voices drifted out the open door. Along with recognizing Temaru’s
voice, another was familiar to his ears. He stepped into the doorway and
stopped.

Jared leaned forward on a battered wooden counter, his chin
cupped in his hand, eyes focused on Temaru. His entire demeanor dripped
flirtatiousness. “So, you’re patient with newbies?”

Ian ground his teeth. Why the hell was that little punk
here? Of all the diving shops, Jared had to come to this one? Well, it wasn’t
like the island was all that large, so there probably really weren’t too many
shops like Temaru’s and this one was close to where they were staying, but
still, something told him Jared hadn’t walked in here by accident.

Temaru speaking brought Ian’s attention back from his
thoughts.

“I’m always patient guiding people new to diving. I’ve never
had anyone hurt under my watch and I hope to never have such a horrible thing
happen. Diving is a beautiful and wondrous thing. I work very hard to make it
safe and enjoyable for anyone regardless of their experience.”

At Temaru’s professional response, Ian felt a smile creep
onto his lips. It seemed Temaru wasn’t swayed by Jared’s pretty face.

As if sensing his presence, Temaru looked past Jared and met
Ian’s gaze. “Hey! I’m glad you made it. Did you have any trouble finding the
shop?”

Ian pulled off his sunglasses and walked toward the counter.
“No, you gave me great directions.”

Jared’s eyes narrowed at him. “I can’t believe you managed
to roll out the door this morning since you took that six-pack of beer to bed
with you last night.”

“What or who I take to bed is none of your business. What’re
you doing here, anyway?”

Jared shrugged. “I’ve been thinking of some things I wanted
to do while we were here and I thought it’d be cool to go diving.”

“You were eavesdropping outside my bedroom door last night,
weren’t you?”

Jared’s mouth dropped open. He let out a cough as if
offended. “No!”

Ian nodded, his expression revealing his disbelief. “Why
don’t you go back to the house? You should start getting ready for your shoot.
You don’t have time to go diving.”

Jared turned a smile toward Temaru. “I’m a model.” He looked
back to Ian, a scathing look taking over his countenance. “My shoot isn’t until
this afternoon and I don’t have to do anything to get ready.” He stepped back
from the counter and faced Ian as he gestured to himself with both hands. “Look
at me. All I need to do is show up.”

Ian leaned against the counter and propped himself up on his
elbow. “If you say so. But you might want to think about plucking that
tentacle-looking nose hair before it slaps someone in the face when you
breathe.”

Jared’s hand shot up to cover his nose. His gaze darted to
Temaru.

Temaru looked at him with a serious face. “I’m sorry. I
didn’t want to say anything.”

Jared spun around and stomped toward the door, his hand
still over his nose. As soon as he was out of sight, Temaru burst out laughing.

Ian gazed at the empty doorway, shaking his head. “He’s
going to walk all the way back to the house with his hand over his nose, the
little fool.” He turned to Temaru, drinking in his deep laugh. “Thanks for
following my lead.”

“Certainly,” Temaru said between laughs. “It was cruel,
though. He’ll be furious when he discovers there’s no offending nose hair.”

“He’ll get over it. That’s what the young pup gets for
barking at the old dog.” Ian gazed him, amazed at how Temaru looked even more
stunning than he’d remembered. Temaru had his hair pulled back in a short
ponytail, a few strands hanging loose around his face. He wore a one piece
wetsuit, the top half hanging down in front of him, leaving him bare from the
waist up. “I’m really glad to see you again.”

Temaru’s laugh slowed but his smile stayed in place. “Me
too. I’ve been looking forward to it since last night.” His gaze traveled down
Ian’s body and back up. “You look incredible. Your hair…it’s shorter, isn’t
it?”

Ian nodded, combing his fingers through his hair. “Yeah, I
got it cut last night.”

“It looks good. I like it.”

“Thanks.”

“So, that guy,” Temaru flicked his chin toward the door,
“he’s one of your friends?”

“I don’t know if I’d go so far as to even call him an
acquaintance, but yeah, I came here with him. My agent and his husband are my
actual friends.”

Temaru nodded thoughtfully. “Then you’re a model too?

“Used to be. I guess I should’ve said former agent.”

“Why don’t you do it anymore?”

Ian glanced to the side. “Long story.”

Silence fell over them.

Ian didn’t know what to say. Like he seemed to do with
everyone these days, he’d ruined a good and fun moment with Temaru. But what
was he supposed to tell him? That because of him, his brother was killed and it
turned his dream life into a nightmare? That he couldn’t hack it, so he ran?
Yeah, that wouldn’t make him come across at all like a head case. Not that he
wasn’t already coming off that way.

Once again he wondered why Temaru had bothered with him. It
was probably a case of trying to be nice to someone, ending up with more than
expected and not knowing how to politely back out.

Temaru slid his hand across the counter and rested it over
Ian’s. “I really am glad you’re here.”

Ian glanced down at their hands, then up to Temaru. His
heart pounded heavier, faster, as he looked into Temaru’s eyes. They were so
warm and comforting and at this moment, he could see the attraction in them. He
rested his other hand on top of Temaru’s. “I am too.”

“Do you want to get ready to go out?”

“Yeah.”

Temaru stepped around the counter, stretching his arm to
keep Ian’s hand in his. He led him toward a rack of diving suits. “Go ahead and
pick out one.”

“But these all look new.”

“They are.” Temaru playfully bumped him on the shoulder with
his shoulder. “I’ll spare you the cooties of getting into a rental.”

“I appreciate that. But I don’t want to take your new
merchandise. I’ll pay for it.”

Temaru waved his other hand, brushing away Ian’s concerns.
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll hose it out when we’re done and no one will ever
know the difference.”

Ian snapped his head toward him.

Temaru laughed and squeezed Ian’s hand. “I’m joking!
Consider it a gift.”

Ian chuckled with him. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” Temaru released Ian’s hand and walked
toward the door. “I’m going to get the boat ready. It’s at the dock right
across from here. Just come out when you’re done.”

“All right.”

Ian fixed his gaze on Temaru’s ass. The wetsuit hugged it,
showing the firm, perfect curves. Same as his heartbeat had quickened looking
into Temaru’s eyes, his cock hardened as he stared at Temaru’s ass. He let his
gaze travel up to Temaru’s broad back, the coppery skin over thick lines of
muscle. More than his cock started feeling aroused. His whole body yearned to
feel and explore Temaru’s.

From how Temaru had looked at him, he now knew there was
definite attraction on Temaru’s part. That thought was enough to make his head
spin. Along with it, he really hoped Temaru was a fast mover. He wanted to be
naked and wrapped around him before the day was over.

As Temaru disappeared from view, Ian pulled in a deep
breath, attempting to gain some control. He looked around the shop to distract
his thoughts. The teak floor was worn with age, but that only marked it with
character. To the right was the rack of rental wetsuits and two dressing rooms.
To the left, the new ones along with an assortment of swimsuits for men and
women. Farther up the left wall were snorkels, fins, masks, weight belts,
regulators, underwater flashlights and other equipment neatly organized. Behind
the counter were a few diving cylinders. By the high quality of product Temaru
carried and the pride he took in the shop’s appearance, it seemed he was making
a comfortable living for himself.

Ian flipped through the new men’s wetsuits. He found one in
his size and went into one of the dressing rooms. The thin neoprene formed to
his body like a rubbery second skin of black and gray. After verifying the fit,
he pulled down the top, leaving it hanging at his waist like Temaru. He looked
at his reflection and nearly pulled the top back up, but he didn’t. If Temaru
was interested in him, he should know all of him. Collecting his clothes and
his courage, he walked out of the dressing room and left the shop.

Temaru looked up at the sound of footsteps on the dock and
found himself unable to stop his gaze from moving over Ian’s bare torso. Not
that he wanted to or even tried. Ian had a beautiful body, his chest dusted in
black hair and abdomen lined in fine muscle.

The evening before when he was walking on the beach, even
from a distance he’d been able to tell he was approaching the most stunning man
he’d ever seen. When Ian walked through the shop’s door that morning, he’d had
to grip the counter to ground himself and not swoon.

With the thick stubble gone, he was now able to see how
finely chiseled Ian’s features were. And his eyes, such a beautiful, smoky
gray…even if there was a deep sorrow in them. He wondered what had put that
look in Ian’s eyes. It seemed it’d been there for a long time.

In the short conversations they’d had, twice Ian had
withdrawn into himself at the mention of his brother and modeling. He had a
feeling both were connected to the sadness in Ian’s eyes. He only hoped as they
got to know each other, Ian would feel comfortable enough with him to share.
Family, friends, strangers, he didn’t like to see anyone unhappy.

And he did want to get to know Ian better. He had plenty of
friends on the island, but intimate companionship was a bit tougher to come by.
It’d been so long since he’d had a steady boyfriend. Not that he was already
thinking Ian would be a boyfriend to him. Ian was a tourist, not a permanent
resident, and would pass through as fleeting as the wind.

Over the past few years, he’d tried to steer away from dating
tourists for that very reason. They came…and they went. And none ever came
back. Of if they did, they never looked him up. He was nothing more than a fond
memory and a good story for them when they went home. He knew his role. He was
the exotic islander who showed them a great time while on their tropical
getaway.