My Dearest Naomi (10 page)

I learned something new the other day at school. One of the children, Lacie, claimed that “stolon” is a word. I said it wasn’t. She declared up and
down her mom said it was. So off we went to the dictionary, and the child was correct. Poor teacher.

This finds me alone in the house again, and it’s impossible to describe the lonely feelings I have. You would have to go through this yourself to understand. I received another of your welcome letters today, and it’s always so heartwarming to hear that you still care for me. I have a problem at times believing anyone could love me, including God. I am constantly questioning my worth and coming up far short. I could never be good enough for God, or you, or anyone else. But I am trying hard to believe the fact that God cares for me even with all my faults. Maybe someday I’ll have my faith strengthened and be strong enough to fully understand and absorb His love.

I will close this letter. If I’ve said too much, your wastebasket is always handy.

With all my love,

Eugene

September 28

This finds me happier than I have been since I came out here. The reason lies in the fact that I’ve just been told I will get to see you over the weekend. Oh, glorious thought! Lonnie and Luella didn’t say anything to me about these plans until yesterday evening. They want to come out for a visit because they are anxious to see my home community. They thought a good time to do so would be over our communion, which is this weekend. Yippee…I shall see you soon! It’s a good thing you mentioned when communion was going to be or I would never have known.

Last night was a school board meeting. It went really well. Since it was my first one, I was a little nervous, but there was nothing to it. For one thing, they don’t have school meetings like the Amish do, where all the parents come, sit around, and take turns talking in public about their concerns. Here only the three board members attend on the first Monday evening of each month. Then twice a year there is a meeting where all the parents can come, bringing in food and playing games. During the course of the evening, each set of parents then has a chance to talk privately with the teacher.

Luella found a poem about a teacher, which she read to me the other evening, and Lonnie and I had a good laugh. The story was told to her about a teacher called Miss Blodgit who was going to spank one of her pupils. She had him stand up in front of her desk and had her stick all ready. Before Miss Blodgit started, she told the boy that if he would write a poem she wouldn’t spank him. So the student quickly rattled this poem off:

Here I stand

Before Miss Blodgit.

She’s going to hit me,

And I’m going to dodge it.

—A
NONYMOUS

Janie and Amanda wanted in on the fun when Luella told them the story, so they tried to come up with a poem for me. I ended up helping them out, and this is what we came up with. Everyone got a big roar out of it.

Here I stand

Before Eugene, wary.

He’s going to spank me,

And it’s awful scary.

With love,

Eugene

September 29

Greetings of love!

I had a headache this morning, and I’m feeling like the flu is creeping up on me. Add to that, we are fasting this morning for communion next Sunday. I fixed breakfast for the younger ones, and I’m quite hungry.

I worked at Mrs. Bach’s in the afternoon, and this time John went with her. That left me there alone except for the dog. Dad had been there this morning to do repairs and repaint the roof on their house. I don’t think he finished painting, but the roof doesn’t leak anymore, he said.

This evening Dad went somewhere to look at two horses—workhorses I think, so he must have next spring’s work on his mind already. He isn’t back yet, and it’s 9:00. We had supper finished at 7:00. I washed the dishes and then walked down to Ada’s to play Ping-Pong with Lester and Don. It was fun.

Thursday and Friday I have to work in Salem on my babysitting jobs, as usual. I hope those two days will go zooming fast, but I doubt it.

Well, since I can’t find any more news to write I will sign off.

I wish I could see you again right now,

Naomi

October 4

This finds me back from the weekend with you. You looked a little shocked when I walked in, and I can understand why because you’d just received my letter telling you I was coming. It was very, very good to see you. You already know of course, since I told you in person, but still I will say it again and again.

I am up in my room now, just home from school. I was longing to see you on the walk home—so much that it almost hurt.

The weather is balmy, with a nice wind out of the south. There were no clouds in the skies except my memories of you.

I’d better quit thinking about such things or I won’t be able to write any more. You made me feel so loved that it continually sends warm circles around my heart.

Thank you.

And I love you,

Eugene

October 4

Greetings of love!

Thank you for a most enjoyable weekend. I can’t put into words what those two days with you meant to me. When you left Sunday evening, I went into the house, turned out the light, and ran to the entrance window to watch you go out the lane in your buggy. As your buggy lights disappeared down the road, tears rolled down my cheeks.

This morning I heard someone blowing their horn as they went past on the road, and Mom hollered out, “There they go!” I quickly ran to the window and saw you before you were past Ada’s place. I hadn’t realized you’d be going past our place or I would’ve been looking for you.

I feel so empty now, but still when I think of the wonderful time we had and the joy of being with you, it also makes me happy. I guess maybe it’s possible to be happy and sad at the same time.

Mom and I fall cleaned the upstairs today. I washed and ironed afterward. Mom is determined to get everything we started done today, so she’s ironing now after supper at 7:30.

I still feel threatened by the flu bug, but thankfully it stayed away over the weekend. I think there is a lot of truth to the saying that when you’re excited or happy, you’re not nearly as apt to be sick or to give in to it as when you are sad or depressed. Oh, groans. I know it’s coming now for sure.

I’m still feeling depressed, and I just thought, “If I ever get married to Eugene, I’ll be in heaven.” That “if I ever” sounds rather hopeless, but a wedding seems such a long way off. The longing for you is very intense right now. To see your smile would be so wonderful. Do you have any idea how handsome you look when you are happy and smiling?

I still have this flu headache, but I went to work anyway. When I came home, I ate two apples with peanut butter. At least I still have my appetite. Peanut butter has some sugar in it, I think, so I felt a little chirped up.

This is Wednesday morning at 9:30. I had a bad night and don’t feel
well at all this morning. Last night at 11:00, I woke with an extremely bad headache. I thought my head would split. This morning it isn’t quite as bad. Mom said I shouldn’t go to work. I’m determined not to miss work though, so I’m planning on going. Maybe I’ll feel better by 1:00, when my ride arrives.

Mom went to the sewing this morning, so I’m in the house alone at the moment. I doubt if I’ll go tonight to the youth gathering unless I feel a lot better. Tomorrow Mom, Rosanna, Betsy, and I want to go to Bloomington to shop at a neat little dry goods store. The reason is that Elena Marshall has wanted to take us for some time. She says she loves to go down there. It’s supposed to be something awesome.

Mom asked this morning, “Do you think you can go tomorrow if you feel so bad?”

I replied, “I’m going regardless how I feel.”

Always remember
I love you,

Naomi

October 7

I arrived home from school, took a long jog, and am sitting here writing to you still sweaty. I was greatly pleased and very surprised to find one of your wonderful letters waiting for me. I plopped right down to read it without cleaning up. I was hoping all day for a letter, but I tried to keep my hopes down because I thought another one probably wouldn’t come until Friday at the earliest.

It means so much to me that you enjoyed the weekend. I told Lonnie to blow the horn when we went past. They both laughed at me because I was staring out of the truck window at your place. I’m sure I saw you inside the house, and that memory, along with the one of seeing you walk into the house as I was leaving on Sunday evening, still lingers in my mind.

On the way home we stopped in Peoria to go to the home office of the company that makes Lonnie’s freedom phone. It’s the kind of phone that works like a CB radio, and Lonnie’s has been broken for some time. There’s no one around their area able to fix it. Anyway, we had a hard time finding the phone place, driving all over that huge city. Once we did find them, they sent us someplace else for the repair. We ended up getting lost again and having to turn back a few times before locating it.

While Lonnie was inside talking with the repair people, I dashed next door to a hardware store for a flashlight purchase. I dropped mine and broke it last weekend when I was home. I’d also been keeping my eye open for a gift shop where I could buy cards because I’m completely out of them. They are very hard to find in our little town. There was no place nearby that sold cards. We did see a shopping mall later with a “Hallmark” sign on one of the stores. Luella spotted it, and Lonnie nearly wrecked as he cut across the lanes to reach the driveway. But we are all still alive, and I am loaded up on cards.

By that time it was 1:00, so we stopped at a Wendy’s for lunch. I was starving and eagerly gulped down a burger, fries, and Frosty. Yummy, yummy. Lonnie said he had to have two Frostys to get over the fright Luella gave him as she directed him to the driveway for the card store. Luella, of course, claims it wasn’t her fault at all, that she was only pointing toward the store.

Just think—when you next get a card from me—there was almost
bloodshed buying the things. What an awful thought, but I’m feeling right awful at the moment.

I miss you, 

Eugene

October 7

Mom, Rosanna, Betsy, and I came home from Bloomington at around four this afternoon. We left after five this morning, and my was it a blast! We browsed the stores, bought material, just did this and that and the other. Then we went to Dutch Kitchen for lunch. Betsy and I each ordered a shrimp basket. Betsy managed to eat all of hers, but I couldn’t so I brought mine home and Dad ate the rest. Now he won’t be hungry for supper, but he doesn’t seem to mind. I guess my flu is still not over, as I feel a headache threatening again.

I should have been smart and stayed away from the youth gathering last night, but I decided to go at the last minute. My flu symptoms weren’t too bad while we played volleyball. Especially with Don and Joseph Miller playing beside me. Don can be a real cutup, and he kept me laughing with his wisecracks.

We girls went inside early, but the host family offered nothing to eat but homemade ice cream and cinnamon rolls. Those are excellent tasting foods if I’d had other healthy things to eat earlier, but I didn’t. Dan had told us to eat supper before we came, but I ignored the instructions since I was feeling yucky. Thankfully things didn’t get out of hand, even with not eating. I would have cried if I’d ruined the trip into Bloomington for myself.

Robert was very sympathetic all evening at the gathering, which I thought was nice of him. When we were playing the last game, I must have looked pretty rough because Phillip Yoder said, “Well, Naomi, you can just go sit down and rest and think of Eugene.”