My Forbidden Mentor (11 page)

Miss Beckett lifted from the chair. “Yes, I have a neighbor friend that can help.” She smiled again, feeling blessed to have such a generous person as Lord Blackburn to help with their family.

“All right then, I’ll get Melissa.” He took her hand and squeezed in reassurance.

Climbing his mare, he rushed home to make preparations to collect Melissa from Dublin.

John was in such a hurry that he hadn’t notice the plain black rig parked near the front of his manor. Striding down the entry hall toward the stairway, Charles frantically got his attention. “My lord.”

John stopped. “Yes, Charles, what is it?”

“Miss Walker awaits you in your library sir.”

Charles looked uneasy. John could only imagine the verbal torture Vanessa had put him through.

Vanessa. He didn’t have time to deal with Vanessa. Good lord, how was he going to get rid of her? Undoubtedly she would be expecting to spend time with him to make up for these past weeks. Oddly enough, he hadn’t given Vanessa a single thought in the time he hadn’t seen her.

“Charles, I’ll take care of Miss Walker. Have Simon ready my carriage. I’m taking a short trip.” With a half twist he headed for the library.

“Vanessa, how are you?” he asked after closing the library doors behind him, trying not to sound transparent.

She turned from her exploration of a wide selection of books. “Hello John. The question is, how are you?” she asked as she pranced toward him, feeling hurt that she hadn’t seen him for some time.

Not sure how he was going to handle this, he carried on. “I’m doing well. You didn’t tell me how you’re doing?” Knowing by now she wasn’t falling for his evasiveness, her blue eyes, normally full of lust, were cooling before his eyes.

“You have to ask? I haven’t seen you for weeks. This isn’t like you, John.” Her tone came out perturbed, as he expected.

The time had come to deal with her flat out. “I have to ask, since I haven’t seen you.” That wasn’t flat out, that was digging himself in deeper.

Her finger went to his lips, tracing them. “And why is that?” she purred.

His hand braced over hers, pulling her finger away from his mouth. After letting go of her hand he strode over to the window to look outside. “I’ve been busy.” Especially right now, he wanted to say as he blindly gaped into the spotty clouded landscape.

Her blond brows arched out of keen interest as she walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. “Too busy for little Vanessa?” she whispered in a flirtatious tone as her hands slid down to his groin region, grasping him, making his eyes close at the implied gesture.

It had been a long time since he’d had that kind of pleasure and here was Vanessa, willing and able. They’d had a pleasurable time in the past but now it wasn’t Vanessa he hungered for. He could feel himself rising from her touch, which had him gathering all his resources for control. “Vanessa, I can’t.” His hand grasped hers together to stop her.

Pulling away from him, she stood facing his back, her hands on her hips. “You can’t or you won’t? Your body says otherwise.” He looked over his shoulder at her. She received a concentrated stare from him, like he was lost for words. “What has gotten into you? What has changed over these past weeks?” she demanded, confused and hurt.

He faced her now, looking distraught while telling her, “I just can’t. I’m tired.” He could reveal no more than that. How could he tell her that he desired only one woman and it wasn’t her? It was a mystery to him that one woman could consume his sole attention. This was new territory, making it seem even more exasperating that with a chance to find pleasurable release, he didn’t take the offer.

Because of his recent behavior Vanessa urged, “You’ve never been so tired to pass on our lovemaking before. There’s someone else, isn’t there?” And while waiting for his answer, he didn’t respond. “You don’t have to say anything John. You’ve found a new distraction, it has to be that, but with our long history, well, I’m sure it’s just a phase you’re going through. When you’re bored again, you’ll come around and I’ll be waiting.” Her voice that turned to ice camouflaged the pain she was feeling.

John changed his mind and decided to explain to her, try to explain about something he wasn’t sure of himself. His mouth opened to speak when her arms slipped around his neck, pulling his face down to hers, her mouth consuming his.

They were interrupted by a knock at the door. Their lips broke apart. “That’s something to remember me by,” she told him before turning to leave. Opening the library door she brushed by Charles in a rush.

“Yes Charles?” John said, retrieving his breath, thankful for the interruption. The familiarity of Miss Walker was enticing enough to give into, if only temporarily to sate his bountiful appetite.

“Your carriage is ready, sir. May I ask your destination?” Charles, who always saw to every detail, needed to know.

“Of course. I’m off to Dublin. I shall be a day or so.” John gathered his bearings, trying to think of everything he needed to take with him.

“Thank you sir. Also, Sir Robert has just arrived. He’s in the stables conversing with Simon.” A slight crease developed on Charles lips.

“Thank you Charles,” he said, remembering to give him a nod of release.

John had his arms full with his coat, gloves and a leather pouch he usually carried along if he planned on staying somewhere over night. Robert knew him too well. “Leaving? I’ve just arrived,” Robert asked, as he entered through the front doorway.

In deep concentration, John responded. “I’m off to Dublin. It’s urgent. Are you up for a short trip?” he asked Robert as he whisked by him, placing his belongings in the carriage.

“Of course,” Robert replied and was curious about John’s previous visitor. “Was that Vanessa leaving?” he asked, following him back outside.

“Yes. She’s not in the most cheerful of moods. Charles had perfect timing, I must say.” John’s grin widened as they both settled inside the carriage. “It’s been so long I almost gave in.” He chuckled. “I’m so wound up I could have taken her even if she was scratching my eyes out.” He hadn’t wanted Vanessa, but damn, Melissa had been driving him crazy because of her inexperience. He needed to go slow, painfully slow, with her, more than ever now that she had so many crises thrown at her at once, and the most recent could be the most devastating. It was up to John to soothe her.

“Perhaps you should have, John, release some of the pressure, as they say,” Robert commented, as they both got comfortable in the leather seats.

John smiled at Robert’s comment, keeping his thoughts private. Along the journey John explained what the urgency was about, how Melissa’s father had just passed away and how delicate the situation would be.

Robert knew it was more than that though, and he knew that John would bring her back home offering more than genuine comfort. John had never spent so much of his free time with a woman before. Melissa might be his student and she might have been injured recently, but John had more than the standard agenda on his mind. For a man who usually remained calm, now he seemed uptight and out of control.

They arrived in Dublin in the evening hours. They checked a few of the local lodgings until they found the one where she was staying. Finding her room, John knocked but there was no answer. He waited a few moments and still there was no answer, so he figured she had gone out for supper.

He suggested to Robert that they wait at a local pub to pass the time until she returned. They entered a pub a few buildings down from the hotel, sat at the bar, and ordered drinks.

The increasing laughter and volume of music got John’s attention. Turning to look at the commotion he saw a golden haired woman being entertained by a group of dancing Irish men. He couldn’t see her face but he could hear her laughing. Her laughter sounded familiar and intoxicating, having a full-bodied ring to it. The only other woman whose laughter intoxicated him like that was . . . Melissa.

His brows creased with the shifting of his head. Through a fog of smoke filling the room and hordes of dancing male bodies surrounding her, his tall, extraordinary figure lifted to get a better view. His height towered above most average men, so now as he was standing, his viewpoint allowed a clearer look, a much clearer look. The young lady wasn’t just an Irish lass enjoying an evening of entertainment but in fact was his charming, not fully recovered student, yes indeed, the same student who had been aloof in his presence of late. Aloof with him, but laughing with these dancing men she didn’t even know. She was having a good time and so were the men around her, panting about her like dogs in heat. So she’s not as innocent as she appears to be, he convinced himself. His expression turned angry and his breathing turning violent as he watched. Unable to bear anymore he poured the remainder of his drink into his mouth and told Robert through tightened lips, “Let’s go. I’ve seen enough.”

Melissa’s day had been a long one. Even after traveling the whole day before she hadn’t slept a wink thinking about the events of today. She hadn’t planned to join in the pub’s entertainment this evening but Kurt had talked her into it. She admitted to enjoying herself but the time had come to rest and recharge, for tomorrow was a new adventure. She bid Kurt a good evening and left.

Kurt, bless his soul, agreed to be her chaperone but learned from the beginning that Melissa would not tolerate his constant attendance, so they made a deal. He would know the locations she planned on visiting but would only check on her periodically. They agreed and went their separate ways.

Trailing down a cobblestone walkway she gave thanks to her father again. This trip may have been the diversion she needed. Thoughts of John had trickled into her mind over and over since their intimate encounter. It hadn’t helped when he’d come by her home every day to verify her progress, and although she hadn’t forgotten his actions in the library, she had to admire his loyalty as a friend. Even before their single intimate act Melissa believed they’d become good friends. She assumed that’s why it hurt so much when hearing him with another woman. If they hadn’t been intimate, perhaps it wouldn’t have bothered her so much.

Lost in her thoughts she started to stumble on the uneven cobblestone due to the shuffle in her footing. She managed to regain her balance by putting the majority of her weight on her good leg but before she knew it a gentleman had flown out of a carriage and tried to help her. Leaning against the hotel building she thanked the gentleman for his efforts. “Thank you sir. I can manage now.”

“Are you quite sure you’re all right?” The gentleman asked.

She seemed more mentally shaken up than anything. “Yes, I’ll be fine. I have a room in this hotel. Thank you.” She smiled, stepping toward the door of the hotel.

Entering her room she was feeling relieved and lucky to have escaped further injury to her bum leg. She sat on the bed for a moment thinking about the kind gentleman that offered to help her and then lay back, shutting her eyes. Letting out a long awaited breath, she started to relax when a deep, inquiring voice spoke to her in the darkness of her room.

“Did you enjoy yourself tonight?”

Jumping from the sound of his voice, her eyes flew open and she sat up. She couldn’t see him but she recognized his husky, powerful voice. She stood, scrambling to light a candle. “Where are you?” she asked with impatience. Once lit, she held the candle in her hand. The glow of the flame flickered brighter, enough so her eyes adjusted to the figure of a man sitting in a chair near the window. The back of his form was shadowed from the darkness of the night but his face was lit by the candlelight and appeared so concentrated she could see the muscles in his jaws tightening. “What are you doing here?” she demanded, her features no longer startled but displeased to be staring into the face of her mentor.

“I’m here to protect my investment,” he told her, her continuing anger at him mixing up his reasons for being there.

“Investment?” she asked, not understanding his meaning.

“You’re my student. I can’t have you getting into trouble,” he told her, his face remaining stern and unmoving, although to him the investment included more than being a mere student of his.

“What do you consider getting into trouble and since when is this any concern of yours?” she hissed through tightened lips and a moment of silence stood between them.

Lord, if she only knew how much of a concern she’d become to him. Her own father had made sure of that. “I don’t believe you realize how attractive you are. Having all those men lingering around you is dangerous,” he spit out, angered by the company she kept tonight and lusting after her himself.

“What?” She wondered what he meant, and then it dawned on her that he must have seen her at the pub, although she didn’t remember seeing him there.

Watching the flame flicker against her beautiful face made him want to throw her on the bed and make her his once and for all, but he didn’t move, instead telling her, “I saw you, Melissa. I saw you laughing with those men. They were salivating all over you.” His jealousy was coming on full force now, making his hands grip the arms of the chair. He never got jealous like this and he wasn’t sure how to handle it. His narrowed eyes followed her as she placed the candle on the mirrored dresser.

She stood with one hand on her hip and the other making gestures toward him as her voice was straining. “How dare you spy on me and accuse me of philandering with those men. You have no right accusing me of something you know nothing about, especially when you’ve got your own harem back home,” she flung back.

He didn’t want to argue about his supposed harem so he ignored her statement. He leaned forward in the chair, anger seeping through his teeth. “I’m telling you what I saw with my own eyes,” he told her while his body was teetering on control causing the knuckles of his interlocking fingers to turn white.

Her brows creased with the narrowing of her eyes. “What you saw and what you imagined were two different things John. I didn’t want those men,” she countered and wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing that he was the only man she wanted, even as arrogant and possessive as he was. “They were showing me an Irish dance, if you must know. I’ve always wanted to learn one,” she pointed out. As angry as she was even seeing him through dim candlelight he was extraordinary, despite his angered expression. She cursed him in silence for wanting to feel his lips against hers. Craving his affections but knowing it would complicate matters, she restrained herself.

Lifting from the chair and stepping toward her, he stood facing her with candlelight glowing between them. He didn’t speak for a long time, his gray eyes staring with a look of passion. He knew she spoke the truth but his eyes had deceived him. He still saw those men around her, lusting after her, lusting after his woman who remained untouched.

By the look in her eyes he knew she was his for the taking, but he wouldn’t, not their first time together, not in his angered state. He had to get her out of there. Damn her for being alone, he thought. She was lucky one of those men didn’t force themselves upon her. And where the hell was Kurt? Knowing Melissa, she had probably made a deal with him.

His lips twisted. “Well, I’m glad you learned a new dance, it will give you something to practice . . . at home,” he authorized, picking up her suitcase which he’d taken the liberty to pack earlier. “We’re leaving, let’s go.” Waiting for her, she didn’t move but stood her ground.

His commanding image dominated her for a moment but then a stir of anger arose and her power regained. “You can’t just waltz in here and expect me to obey your every command.” She was livid. For him to assume he could take over and run her life was absurd.

“Watch me,” he told her. On instinct his hand tightened on the bag as she lunged forward to grab it but his grip was too strong.

Frustrated, she stood there with hands balled into fists at her sides. She realized now the power she gave him by giving into their stolen moment of pleasure in the barn. Because she had allowed him to touch her, he now took possession of her? That wasn’t going to continue, she would set him straight now, before it got out of hand.

The challenge of stubbornness began and could be seen in the narrowness of their eyes. Stuck into a locked gaze that could only be broken by one of the challengers forfeiting, Melissa said with unmoving eyes, “I know why you’re acting this way and it will not work.”

His velvet brows arched in response, curious as to what she meant. “Acting what way? What are you talking about?” knowing emphatically that his jealousy was no secret, even to himself.

“This possession of yours has got to stop. Just because I let you touch me doesn’t give you the right to own me,” she whipped out, setting him straight so he wouldn’t be left in the dark about her meaning.

His thoughts reflected back to the hayloft, immediately knowing what she referred to. His teeth ground together as air exhaled from his nose. “I am not trying to own you, Melissa, and as far as touching you, you wanted to be touched. Even if your mouth didn’t speak the words your body told me as much.” His angry mouth curved into a devilish grin. “I didn’t have a fight on my hands, now did I?”

Sometimes he’s to blunt for his own good, she thought. All her denying couldn’t battle the truth he spoke. On purpose she avoided giving a response to his bold words, instead making her conclusion clear. “What happened in the hayloft should never happen again so there is no need to be possessive with me anymore. Are we agreed?”

“Are you asking this of me because you truly didn’t like it or because you can’t handle how good it feels? And don’t say you’re scared, either you liked it or you didn’t,” he questioned as his eyes were daring hers.

She stepped closer to him with only inches to spare between them, her soft lips reddening and firming in annoyance. “What I can’t handle is your possessive nature. It’s maddening,” she voiced in a low and stern tone while keeping her eyes glued to his and not backing away one bit.

Staring into the sparkling hazel depths of her eyes all temptation to conquer her mouth with his flamed before him. Instead he used the last ounce of control he had left and chose to put her in her place once again. “What you call possessive, I call protective. You need my protection, damn it.”

She was impressed with how he could turn situations around. He was down right jealous and he wouldn’t admit it. Protective, huh? He was supposed to be her mentor of thoroughbreds, after all, and it appeared he planned on being her mentor in all areas of her life. “Whom are you protecting me from? Yourself?”

That could be the truth, but in John’s mind he had made a promise to her father that she was unaware of and that promise included protecting her from reckless situations with other men. As for himself, that became another struggle with a life all its own. “Be reasonable Melissa,” he told her as his head shook from aggravation. “I’m finished with this thrashing of words with you.”

“You haven’t agreed with our situation?” It was for the best, she kept telling herself.

“And I’m not going to,” he informed her. It was time they faced the reality of their relationship. She might try to avoid it but he couldn’t. He needed to have a calm conversation with her about this and now wasn’t the appropriate time. Before their personal talk, she needed to know about her father.

“Why not?”  she pushed since he had inflamed her anew.

“Now is not the time. We need to leave now and talk later,” he told her as he motioned for the door with her bag in hand.

“I’m leaving in a few days as I planned,” she stated, by now tired and flustered at his powerful ways.

“You’re leaving now,” he commanded as he grabbed her hand and they were out the door.

On their way from the hotel to John’s rented carriage John noticed her limping was worse. “Your limp is heavier,” he commented.

“What?” She hadn’t paid it any attention, but her leg did ache more than normal.

“You’ve been walking too much too soon on your injured leg.”

Instead of responding, knowing he was right, Melissa stayed quiet.

“Where is Kurt?” John inquired.

The anger hadn’t left his face. She was about to answer him when stepping out of the carriage was the same gentleman that had offered his assistance earlier. Her eyes widened. A friend of John’s, she supposed.

“Melissa, where is Kurt?” Her eyes cut back to John when his tone became demanding.