My Sunshine (16 page)

Chloe
continued crying and rocking herself on the floor until there was a knock on the door. “Chloe, are you still in there?” John called. He jiggled the handle of the locked door.

She jerked her head up and the episode stopped as quickly
as it had started. “Yeah, just a few more minutes.”

“I have to go,” he said. “The keys to the Lexus are on your
bed.”

“Okay. See you later.” She heard him leave. She stuck her
hand in the shower and tested the water. It was cold. “Damn.”

She stepped in anyway and washed quickly in the frigid
shower. When she got out, she looked at herself in the mirror again. “I’ve got to find a doctor.”

In her room, she removed her medication from her top
dresser drawer and took three of the pills, more than her usual dosage. She only had a few left and there was only one refill left on the prescription.

She dropped down on her knees and began to pray. “Dear
Lord, please help me. Please make this voice go away. I know you have it in your almighty power God, to make this disease disappear. Please help me heal. I don't want to lose John. Heal me, I know you can, Lord. Amen.”

John and Tyler were watching television in the den when

Chloe
arrived home that evening. She flopped down next to

John
and kicked off her shoes.

“How’d it go?”
John asked, putting an arm around her shoulders.

“Pretty good. The agency put me in their computers before
lunch, and after lunch I went on three interviews. That’s why I haven’t had my phone on. I should know something in a couple of days.”

“Where were the interviews?”
Tyler asked.

“One was at the hospital in accounting, one was at the
telephone company, and one was at accounting firm that handles money for people who have more money than sense and can’t do it themselves.”

“Oh, like us,”
John said.

Chloe
smiled. She hadn’t thought about John and the other members of the group having their massive fortunes controlled by professionals. “Yeah, kinda like you. Hey, are you looking for a new accountant?”

He shook his head. “I wouldn’t hire some snot-nosed

young’un right out of college to take care of my money.”

She knew he was teasing. She wiped at her nose and
sniffed. “I’m not a young’un!”

They all laughed. “Seriously, though,” she said, once the
laughter had faded away. “Do either of you know how to cook, because I’m, like, starving.”

Tyler
shook his head. “Christine does the cooking,” he said.

“When she’s gone, we eat out.”

Chloe elbowed John playfully in the ribs. “That’s why you moved me in here, so you would have someone to cook for you when Christine's not here.”

“You don’t have to cook,”
John said. “We can go out.”

“Don’t y’all get tired of eating out?”

“Yeah,” Tyler said, “and when we do, we call Jane and she makes us something.”

Chloe
shook her head. “Y’all are just pitiful. I’ll cook.

Let me change my clothes, and I’ll cook something.”

A week later,
Chloe was sitting behind her desk at her new job at the hospital when the phone rang. “Yes?” She answered.

“
Chloe,” her boss, Mr. Briggs said. “Michelle’s got a problem up front with a account holder. Can you go straighten it out please? It’s one of your files. Account number JP25431.

They need the hard copy.”

“Yeah, I’ll be right there.” She hung up the phone and sighed. She had been at her job for three days and most of that time had been spent trying to organize files. Twice already today she had had to settle a dispute between an account holder and the billing department. She searched through the piles of files on her floor before finding the right one. She carried it through the maze of offices to the counter where people came to pay their bills.

She approached Michelle and her waiting customer. “What
seems to be the…” her words faded away as she looked into the eyes of JP25431. It was Cassandra Duke, her mother.

                   
Chapter Eight

“
Chlo
e
?” Cassandra said. She shook her head. “I’m sorry. You look like someone I know.”

It didn't surprise
Chloe that her mother didn't recognized her. The last time they had seen each other, Chloe had been sixteen and insane. Her disease had been at its worst and she had had no control of her actions because the voice in her head controlled her every move. She had been disheveled and unkempt and mean. Now, five years later, she was a professional, and she dressed and carried herself in that manner.

She debated on whether or not to tell her mother that her first
instinct was right. “Mrs. Duke,” she said, trying to keep her voice steady. “Would you step in my office please?”

She opened a door and
Cassandra followed her down the hall to her office. Chloe sat behind her desk. Cassandra to the chair across from her. Chloe immediately reached for the picture of Daniel and Rebecca and turned it face down even though from her vantage point, Cassandra couldn't see it. She pulled up Cassandra’s file

on the computer and opened the file in front of her.

“What seems to be the problem?”

Cassandra
handed Chloe an envelope. “I got this letter from the hospital saying they are going to take me to court. We’ve been paying on this bill. How come it says we haven’t been paying?”

Chloe
took the letter out of the envelope and scanned it. It was a basic form letter that stated that the hospital would pursue legal actions to collect the debt if the entire balance was not paid in full. The entire balance was $2,435. Chloe checked her file. The last payment had been three months ago by a check that had been returned. She flipped the pages. Three more payments had also bounced, and the collections department was requiring that the payments be made by cash or money order.

“You haven’t made a payment in three months,”
Chloe said. “This letter is just standard procedure.”

“I gave my husband the money, cash to pay on it. Fifty
dollars a month.”

Chloe
frowned
.
Good ol’ Duk
e
. “It didn’t get paid.

I’m sorry.” She handed the letter back to her mother. “You’re
in default now. It’s being sent to a collection agency. Unless you can pay the whole thing, I really can’t help you.”

Cassandra
took the letter with trembling hands. “I don’t know what to do. I can’t pay this. I work as a waitress. My husband has run off on me now.”

Chloe
hardened her heart
.
This woman hates you. She chose Dukeover you. Her reputation ruined your
s
. Sh
e
flipped through the file again
.
You have to take this chance to forgive her, Chloe. There is a reason she is here
.
She rubbe
d
her temples, indecision confusing her.

“What can I do?”
Cassandraasked. “You know, you have
a
remarkable resemblance to someone I know. What was you
r
name again?”

Chloe
realized that she had not formally introduced herself to her mother, and she hadn’t worked there long enough to have her name on her door or a nameplate for her desk.

She cleared her throat. “It’s me, Mom.”

Cassandra leaned forward. “Chloe? How is that you?”

Chloe
shook her head. “It just is. It’s me.”

“I thought you were…the last time I talked to
Daniel you were in the hospital.”

“Good grief, Mom, that was three years ago at least. People
get better.”

“How did you get here? Where are you living?”

She wasn’t about to share the information about John. “I came down to live some friends.”

“You look good,”
Cassandra observed. “You must be doing okay for yourself.”

Chloe
nodded. “I am.”

“So are you going to take care of this bill for me? Can’t you
just hit a button over there and make it all disappear?”

Chloe
shook her head. “No, I can’t do that.”

“Then how about letting me borrow about $2500?”

“No.”

“How come? I know you have it. Or you can borrow it
from your brother. Come on, Chloe, I’m your mother.”

Chloe
stood up. “There’s nothing I can do for you. Call a lawyer, file bankruptcy, I don’t care what you do.”

Cassandra
stood, too. “Fine. You were always good for nothing.” She left the office, slamming the door behind her.

Chloe
gripped the edge of her desk. Her mother’s words echoed in her head. It quickly changed to another voice
.
See
,
Chloe. You’re worthles
s
. She sank into her desk chair and took a couple of deep breaths
.
See what you’re going to en
d
up like
?
She banged her head on the desk, trying to knock the voice out. She kept banging, not caring about the noise she was making or the damage she was doing to her skin
.
You wer
e
always good for nothing.

“No,” she moaned.

“Chloe,” a voice said.

She stopped banging her head and looked up. It was her
boss, Mr. Briggs. “Are you okay?”

She shook her head. “I have a headache.” She rubbed her
forehead.

“Maybe you should take the rest of the day off,” he

suggested. “Go see a doctor.”

She nodded. “Yeah, I will. Thanks.” She gathered her
pocketbook and left her office
.
I am going to have to go to th
e
doctor. I need to find someone to refill my meds. And th
e
prescription's just not right.

She stepped outside. I
t was raining. She liked the rain, it made her feel like no one was looking at her. She glanced at her watch. It was just after two in the afternoon. She knew if she went home, she would be alone. John and Tyler were in the studio and Christine was supposed to be in meetings that afternoon with her manager discussing her upcoming spring tour.

She drove to the house. She took the phone book from the
kitchen drawer and went to her room. Although she was alone, she closed and locked the door. She opened the yellow pages to the physicians’ section and scanned the ads until she got to the Psychiatrists. She called the first two numbers just to be told that she would need a referral from her primary doctor
.
But I’
m
crazy
!
She gave up cold-calling doctors when the next two tries

resulted in being told the waiting lists were months long.

She found the number to her doctor in Asheville in her top dresser drawer. She dialed the number. “Dr. Rick Stanley’s office,” the receptionist answered. “Can I help you?”

“This is
Chloe Boston,” Chloe said. “I need to speak to Dr. Stanley.”

“Okay,
Chloe, honey,” she said. “Let me transfer you to his office.” Dr. Stanley had been the doctor who made the official diagnosis. She trusted him fully and knew he wouldn’t tell Daniel. That he was bound by law not to wasn’t an issue.

“Hey
Chloe, what can I do for you? Is it time for a refill?”

She was required to meet with him once every six months to get
a prescription of her meds.

“Almost. I’m sorry to be doing this over the phone, but I
need help.”

“What’s wrong?” He sounded alarmed.

“I’m having a relapse.” Her voice came out in a whisper.

“Can you come in and see me?”

“No. I moved to Orlando. Can you get me in to see a

doctor here?”

He paused and she could tell he was thinking. “I’m not sure I know anyone in that area. I can do some calling around. I’ll call you back with a name, okay? Until then, tell me what’s

going on.”

“It’s the voice. It’s back. It’s been back for a couple of months now. I can’t shake it.”

“Have you tried adjusting your meds?” She was given a
little leeway with her medication in stressful situations. “Are you under a lot of stress? You did say you moved. When did that happen?”

“I’ve been here a couple of weeks. I moved in with my
boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend?”

“Yeah, I’ve met a man. I’m in love. His name is John. I’m really happy.”

“That’s good,
Chloe, but it’s still a lot of stress. Even good stress can trigger a relapse. How much of your medicines do you have?”

“I have one more refill. I’ll have to get that this week.”

“Okay, listen, Chloe. Call me back with a name and a phone number to a local pharmacy, and I’ll call you in a refill. I also want to add another drug, too, that may help.” He filled her in on the details. “I’ll make you an appointment with a doctor there, but you have to promise me that you’ll go.”

“I promise. I’ll go.”

“Okay, Chloe. Call me back with that number so you can get those meds.”

“Okay, thanks Dr. Stanley.” She hung up the phone and
looked up the number for the pharmacy that she passed everyday on her way to work. She called Dr. Stanley back and left the number with his receptionist.

She went into the bathroom and looked at herself in the
mirror. Her forehead was bruised. She hadn’t been aware she was hitting herself that hard. “Oh well, crap,” she said touching it gingerly. She applied some makeup over it. It helped, but not much.

John was surprised to see the Lexus parked in the driveway.

It was five o’clock but
Chloe wasn’t usually getting home until closer to six. He entered the house and went directly to her room, but she wasn’t there. The clothes she had worn to work were in a pile in beside her bed. He looked in the bathroom, but it was empty.

He found her in his bed, sound asleep. He slid into the bed
with her, wrapping his arms around he as he lined up his body with hers. She mumbled something incoherent and pressed her body into his.

“You’re home early,” he said.

“Yeah. I wasn’t feeling well.”

“How are you feeling now?”

“A little better.”

He put his hand against her forehead to feel for a fever. She
flinched when he touched the bruise. “You don’t feel hot,” he said.

“I’m feeling better.” She sat up. “You want to go get

something to eat?”

“You know I’m always ready to get something to eat,” he
said. He got up from the bed and flipped on the light. “Chloe!

What happened to your head?”

“Oh, crap,” she said, rubbing it again. “I ran into the door.

I’m such an idiot. I tried to cover it with make-up.”

He shook his head. “It didn’t work.”

“Then I’m just going to have a bruised head.”

“Well, at least it will match your purple dress.”

Chloe
fell back on the bed. “Crap, I didn’t even think about the wedding. I hope no one wants to take your picture with me.” Dennis and Shannon’s wedding was in two days.

“I hope so, too,” he said, joking.