Nest of Vipers (28 page)

The children lurched into song again as Tiberius felt the contents of the bowl with his fingertips.

From the peephole at the door Sejanus saw everything. He was shamed by the sight – disgusted by it too. He knew that his Emperor was debasing himself. But he also knew that it was best that it happened – best for Tiberius, best for Rome. 'Shall I summon the slave to remove your night soil, Caesar?' he spoke through the door join.

Tiberius shook his head. Then he placed his face inside the bowl. The taste was unexpectedly sweet; the draught of the Eastern flower had obliterated all the filth and impurities with its healing magic.

'Have you read the names upon the ringleader's list yet, Caesar?'

The Emperor paused in lapping his excrement. 'I will read it shortly,' he replied, feeling much better humoured. 'I shall read it with considerable attention.'

Drusus's eyes were on Sosia's yellow
stola
. The feather-light fabric of it transfixed him in the last of the sun's rays, which streamed through the windows of the dining room. The desire to reach out from where he lay on his couch and touch the lovely garment was so strong it was dangerous. It made Drusus's heart beat like a musician's instrument; it made the sweat gather in the pits of his arms. His practised look of calm hid the frenzy of excuse-making that raged inside his mind. If he touched it, Drusus told himself, he could claim he'd seen a bee on Sosia's arm and that he'd sought to brush it off. Or he could say he'd seen the
stola
about to snag on a furniture nail. Or he could even say that he simply wanted to feel it, which was the truth – why should it be thought of as shameful? The garment was overwhelmingly beautiful. It was a pleasure to Drusus's eyes – and it was surely an unparalleled pleasure to the skin, too. His hand left the dining cushion and floated in the air, towards his mother's unwitting friend as she delivered her news.

'Drusus,' said his grandmother Antonia.

His hand fell back to the dining cushion with a clap as Antonia looked sternly at him. 'Have you been listening?'

Drusus reddened. His grandmother knew
everything
– all the contemptible urges and needs that dwelled within him. She knew what he wanted; she knew what he
was
. She had even written a letter about it to his father, Germanicus, that he had been ordered to deliver in person so that he would receive the consequences. But when the family came to Antioch, they found his father dead. His grief-maddened mother had opened the letter, but the words inside had not been written by his grandmother at all; they said nothing about him. When Drusus read the letter himself, it made no sense; it just contained lurid accusations. All that had mattered to Drusus was that the terrible words – 'transvestite', 'perversion', 'obscene' – had not been there and would never be seen. But his grandmother still knew, even though she had not sought to use it against him since.

'Listening to what?' said Drusus.

There was an uncomfortable pause among the dinner guests. Sosia and her senator husband, Silius, were Agrippina's guests of honour, both seated at her right. Antonia and her widowed daughter Livilla were also in attendance, along with all of Agrippina's children except for Nero. The two youngest sisters began to giggle in their chairs, but the older girl, Nilla, watched her brother Drusus with quiet interest. Agrippina cast an indulgent look at Sosia and Silius, but Antonia's look grew darker.

'Listening to what Sosia has been telling us,' Antonia said. 'It is very serious, Drusus – the Emperor has worked himself up into a state about it.'

'I think it's ridiculous,' said Agrippina. 'What on earth does it matter?'

Antonia's look moved to her daughter-in-law. 'Tiberius is not . . . wholly well.'

I hovered among the serving slaves, taking all this in.

'His mind is troubled,' Antonia said – and it was all she would say.

'He's madder than ever,' said Sosia, who had none of Antonia's tact.

The corpulent Senator Silius looked pained from where he sprawled on his dining couch.

'Well, it's true,' said Sosia for his benefit. 'We're among friends here and we can speak with honesty, can't we? His mind is slipping, cracking, whatever you wish to call it. He's making decisions that are deranged – he finds treasonous activities that simply aren't there.'

'He was kind when he was young – a good and decent man,' said Antonia. 'I'll never forget how good he was to me when his brother, my husband, died – your great father, Livilla.'

Curled up like a cat on her own couch, Livilla said nothing, concentrating intently on her food.

'But he is not that man anymore,' Antonia went on. 'Yet perhaps I could still get through to Tiberius? He has no women around him, you see. His only friends are his guards. He needs a woman's words.'

'He might listen to you,' said Agrippina, although she held little faith.

'Is this about the prayers?' asked Drusus, his mind leaving the lure of Sosia's
stola
.

'Of course it is,' said Antonia. 'The priests made an unforgivable error – unforgivable.' She turned to Livilla. 'Don't you have anything to say about it?'

Livilla looked up at her mother. 'It was all very unfortunate,' she replied. Then she returned to sucking the flesh from a chicken wing.

'But all they asked for was my wellbeing,' said Drusus, 'and Nero's, too. I'm pleased to know they care.'

Antonia was incredulous. 'They asked for it
before
they asked for the Emperor's wellbeing, Drusus. That's the sort of protocol breach that upsets your grandfather greatly.'

His two youngest sisters wisely ceased their giggles and an uncomfortable pause returned. Drusus caught Nilla's eye and saw how intently she followed what was being discussed. He understood now what the problem was. 'But he would never think that the mistake was mine, would he? Or Nero's?'

'What he thinks is unfathomable,' said Agrippina, sipping her wine. In truth she was just as upset by what had occurred as Antonia was, but she was refusing to show it.

'He's had all the priests questioned by Sejanus,' said Sosia. 'All except Nero, obviously.'

Livilla's eyes flicked up from her chicken bone before she threw it to the floor. She held her fingers out for another and, as I was the slave nearest to hand, I offered the serving tray to her. She took a fresh wing from me as if I didn't exist.

'What did the priests tell him?' asked Antonia.

'That it was all an accident, an oversight,' said Silius from his couch. He was a large man, unattractive in his dining
tunica
, and his dignity was always diminished whenever he wore anything other than his toga. Resuming her seat next to him, Sosia placed her hand upon his. 'But still it's put Tiberius into one of his fogs,' said Silius.

Drusus vaguely wished his older brother were there, so that he could share the burden of this unpleasantness. But Nero had taken to avoiding evening meals with his family.

I took a small jug of
liguamen
from one of the other serving slaves and dribbled the pungent fish sauce over Little Boots's food, using the opportunity to catch his eye. He had been silent throughout the entire meal, which was nothing new, but he had been steadily avoiding me since the incident with Lygdus at the baths. I presumed he was still guilt-ridden, and not for the first time I attempted to mend things between us. But the look he gave me as I poured the sauce was chilling. This caught Antonia's attention.

'At least Little Boots was spared this unpleasant incident,' she said. Her favouritism for her youngest grandson was never far from the surface, and Little Boots always knew how to exploit it.

'They spared me their prayers, Grandmother, but they didn't spare me an insult,' he piped up.

'Little Boots – what a thing to say!' Agrippina admonished him.

'Why did my welfare count for nothing with the priests, then? And Nero and Drusus's welfare counted for everything?'

Drusus groaned at his brother's predictable sulking. 'Because you still piss the cot?' he suggested.

Little Boots threw a finger bowl at him.

'Ow!'

Agrippina was suddenly on her feet and Little Boots shrieked as he found his earlobe pinched between her sharp fingernails. 'Mother – let go!'

She looked to me. 'Iphicles, will you conduct Little Boots into the atrium and instruct him on how to conduct himself at the evening meal?'

The two youngest girls shrieked with mirth again but ceased when Agrippina turned her glare upon them.

I bowed. 'Yes,
domina
.'

Agrippina released her youngest son and Little Boots shot off from his place on his grandmother's couch and ran from the room. 'He may be twelve, but he is not too old for the rod,' Agrippina said to me.

I bowed again, deeper this time, and followed the boy. I found him in the atrium with a murderous look to his face. 'Are you really so idiotic,
domine
?' I reproached him.

He was enraged by my choice of words and went to strike me.

'Stop it,' I said. 'Just stop it.' I grabbed his wrists so that he couldn't lay a blow on me, but he was surprisingly strong for his age and we grappled a moment longer before he gave in. I released him again. 'There.'

'The priests insulted me,' he pouted.

'Who cares if they did?'

'
You
should care!'

'I'm thrilled they ignored you, and do you know why? To be ignored is to be safe from Sejanus – and from Tiberius, too. Look at the trouble Nero and Drusus have gained for themselves. To be overlooked is to see our destiny come to pass.'

He looked at me levelly. '
Our
destiny? Are you the second king too?'

As ever with him, I knew when to upbraid and when to assuage. 'Of course not, Caesar,' I said, knowing that he would love me calling him that. 'My role is only to serve.' I gave my deepest bow, knowing also how well he enjoyed physical displays of devotion. But when I righted myself, I saw that his expression was unchanged.

'I'm surprised you notice me at all.'

'
Domine
?' I said.

'You have no time for me at all nowadays.'

'I labour tirelessly for you.'

'I wonder.'

'
Domine
, please, stop all this and come back to the dining room.'

'You say you work tirelessly for me, Iphicles, but how do I know? You tell me nothing of what you actually do.'

I hissed into his ear, mortified that someone might overhear him. 'If you knew, you would be endangered by it. To keep you ignorant is to keep you safe.'

'You promised me that I'd be helping.'

'You are helping,' I claimed.

The murderous look returned to his face. 'Don't treat me like a child, Iphicles, or you'll regret it.'

I took an involuntary step back from him and he instantly liked the effect his words had on me. At least he was smiling now, so I tried again, phrasing with extreme care. 'When the next plan is in place,
domine
, I will tell you all about it and then you can participate in it with me.'

'With you and fat Lygdus?'

'Your jealousy is so insulting –' I began.

He kicked me viciously in the shin. 'So I'm jealous of a fat eunuch slave? Jealous of a turd without any balls? You insult
me
, Iphicles – you offend me like the filthy slave you really are. And you haven't got any balls either, have you?'

'Little Boots!'

We span around. The entire family had entered the atrium. Sosia and Silius were about to go home. A fierce, loaded look passed between Little Boots and me before he responded sullenly to his mother. 'What?'

A violent pounding on the front door of Agrippina's house shocked us all from the exchange.

'
Open in the name of the Emperor!
'

Agrippina and Antonia blanched. Had the accident with the priests' prayers led to Drusus being marked for arrest?

'Not my son . . .' Agrippina murmured.

'This is madness – I'll talk to them,' Antonia said quickly.

Agrippina rushed to Drusus and clutched him to her. He gave a terrified whimper as he realised what was happening. 'Am I being arrested?'

The pounding came again. 'Open up – this is Tribune Naevius Sutorius Macro of the Praetorian Guard!'

'No!' Agrippina cried out.

I alone saw the little thrill that took Livilla's face.

Drusus burst into sobs. 'I did nothing! It was all the stupid priests!'

'Courage, boy,' said Silius, wrapping his street cloak tightly across his dining
tunica
. 'All is not lost. There are means to appeal.'

'They'll kill me first!'

A crash came from the door as the guards started battering it with a wooden ram. The household's slaves began to shriek from everywhere in the house.

'Stop it! Control yourselves!' Agrippina shouted at them.

Antonia gathered herself to her full dignity and strode as far as the
salve
mosaic that marked the spot on the floor between the atrium and the entrance hall. Her voice carried like an arctic wind in her rage. 'This will now cease!'

The slaves stopped their cry and the guards stopped their battering.

'You will leave this house!' Antonia commanded the men on the other side of the door.

There was a brief silence, during which Sosia moved towards Agrippina, taking her hands to comfort her. Drusus tried to choke back his sobs. We could hear the low voices of the guards conferring outside.

I saw Antonia's strength falter slightly. She was as terrified as any of us but she fought hardest to cover it. She was a model to Rome, after all. 'I am Antonia of the Julii,' she called out again after a moment, 'and you will tell my brother-in-law the Emperor that his family loves and honours him. If he has been fed falsehoods regarding treason, then we will refute those falsehoods with dignity – and not with arresting guards. We will see him face to face in the comfort of his
tablinum
, as befits his family.'

'Thank you,' Agrippina whispered to her mother-in-law.

Antonia looked over her shoulder and gave Agrippina a small nod of reassurance to her. 'They will not dare do this,' she whispered.