He glanced at the clock on the dashboard and realized that they’d been at the hospital for nearly four hours and it was past lunchtime. “I have about three more hours before I have to be at work for tonight’s shift. Would you like to grab something to eat somewhere?”
A slow, sexy smile curved her lips. “I can eat anytime.” Her voice dropped to a husky note, and she leaned across the console and nuzzled his neck. “I’d rather spend the time alone with you, at your place.”
Noah wasn’t about to turn down such a provocative invitation. He couldn’t drive home fast enough, and every excruciating mile of the way Jessica continued to seduce him with her hand stroking his thigh, her fingers grazing along the solid bulge in his pants, and her breathing hot and heavy in his ear.
By the time they arrived at his place, he was beyond aroused. Once he had her inside the house, they pulled eagerly at each other’s clothes, leaving a trail of haphazardly tossed garments all the way to his bedroom. Light laughter mingled with sultry groans as their mouths and hands touched and teased, and as soon as they were completely naked she pushed him back onto the bed and climbed on top of him, taking control.
Straddling his hips, she grasped his erection in her hand and guided it between her legs. She slid the sensitive head through her wet folds so he could feel how turned on she was before slowly, leisurely, taking every hard inch of him deep inside her body. When he was in her to the hilt, her lashes fell half-mast and a moan of utter bliss escaped her parted lips as she savored the sensation of fullness.
Splaying her hands on his stomach, she started to move, circling her hips as she slid up and down his shaft. The position afforded him the luxury of watching her and touching her…everywhere. He took her full, firm breasts in his palms and plucked at her nipples, rolling them between his fingers, lightly pinching them until they were rock hard. He skimmed his hands down her slim torso, tracing the curve of her waist with his fingers, caressing her belly, then slid his thumbs into the soft, wet flesh at the apex of her thighs.
She stared down at him, her face flushed and her eyes dark with desire as she rode him hard while he stroked her intimately, escalating her pleasure. She took him without inhibition, holding nothing back. Not her need for him and not the strong, powerful emotions he saw reflected in her gaze.
“Come for me, sweetheart,” he urged, his voice low and deep, his own body tightening and drawing closer to release with every slick slide of her sex against his. “Come for me, Jessie.”
He increased the pressure and friction of his thumbs on her clit, increased the timing of his deep, upward thrusts, and felt her start to unravel and let go. Her head fell back, and her wild spiral curls spilled over her shoulders like a cloud of silk, making her look like a stunning goddess. The hot core of her gripped him tight, then pulsed around his cock as she gave herself over to an unbridled climax.
“Noah…,” she said on a long drawn-out moan.
His name on her lips as she came was the sweetest thing he’d ever heard and sent him over the edge right along with her. Grasping her hips in his hands, he held her in place and drove into her one last time, high and hard, and growled deep in his throat as his own release ripped through him.
She collapsed on top of him in a boneless heap, soft and warm and sated. Welcoming her slight weight, he wrapped his arm around her and held her close, feeling the wild beat of her heart against his chest and the gradual slowing of her breath along his neck.
The moment was sublime, absolutely perfect, and he didn’t want to let her go.
After a while, she moved off of him and stretched like a lazy, content cat. He rolled to his side and grinned down at her, enjoying the flush of satisfaction on her skin and her lack of modesty with him.
When she was done, she blinked up at him and caught him watching her. “What are you smiling about?”
Unable to help himself, he skimmed a finger over one of her nipples, which immediately puckered at his touch. “I’m just thinking about what a lucky guy I am to get to sleep with
the
Jessica Morgan.” He waggled his brows at her.
She laughed, the husky sound soft and intimate between them. “Yeah, well, don’t let it go to your head, mister.”
He’d been teasing her, and he suddenly grew serious, because he wanted her to know that what she did for a living made no difference to him. “The thing is, you’re not
the
Jessica Morgan to me. You’re still just Jessie, the girl I met in high school. That won’t ever change.”
“I don’t ever want it to.” Her eyes shone with an unmistakable honesty. “It’s hard to know who your real friends are in this business, and you’re one of the few that knew me before I became this international pop star.”
He didn’t miss her reference to them being
friends
and decided to pick his battles carefully. “But there’s a lot I don’t know about you
now.
” He knew he was traveling into dangerous territory,
the past,
but it had to be done.
Deliberately, he traced the thin white line of a five-inch scar where it marred her otherwise-perfect skin across the top of her pubic bone, and felt her stiffen in response. He’d seen the mark before, but there had never been a good time to ask about it…until now.
“Like this scar right here. That’s new to me,” he said gently as he stared down at her, thrown off by the rise of panic he saw in her eyes. But it wasn’t enough to dissuade him. “What happened, Jessie?”
“It’s nothing.” Visibly upset, she pushed his hand away and rushed off the bed.
Judging by her reaction, the reasons behind the scar were anything but insignificant. Calmly he said, “If it’s nothing, then tell me what happened.”
When she realized that her clothes were scattered somewhere in the other room, she went straight for his dresser and rummaged through his drawers until she found one of his gray T-shirts. She pulled it over her head, and once she had all her curves covered up she turned to face him again, her chin lifted defiantly. “Don’t you need to get ready for work?”
Clearly, she wanted to avoid the discussion. He didn’t. “Not for another hour,” he said, and slid from the bed.
Warily, she watched as he crossed the room, her entire demeanor now guarded. “How about lunch, then? Are you hungry?”
“I can eat anytime,” he said, using the same words she had just a while ago.
Besides, since he knew they were on the precipice of something huge, something that would possibly explain her past behavior, the last thing on his mind was food. And if there was any chance of them having a real, lasting relationship, he wanted everything out in the open so they could deal with it and move forward.
Finding a pair of cotton sweatpants, he pulled them on and faced her again, prepared to pursue this issue until he got the answers he needed. “This is more important, Jessie.”
“It’s really none of your business.”
“Yeah, well, I’m making it my business,” he said with just as much determination.
Arms crossed over her chest, she glared at him. For a moment he fully expected her to storm out of the bedroom in her refusal to talk, but instead a combination of resolve and purpose flashed in her gaze.
“You’re right,” she stated, her tone still tinged with anger. “This
is
important.”
Despite their being only feet apart physically, emotionally Noah felt as though a mile separated them. Something in her eyes went cold, and even before she spoke his gut tightened with a sense of unease.
“The scar is from an ectopic pregnancy,” she said, her tone flat and perfunctory, as if she were discussing something as mundane as the weather. “The fetus ruptured the fallopian tube, and I had an emergency hysterectomy to remove my left ovary and uterus, and that’s what left a scar.”
The only word his mind latched onto was
pregnancy.
She’d been
pregnant.
His mind reeled at the revelation, even as his heart squeezed at the loss she’d suffered.
“When?” he asked, already tormenting himself with thoughts of Jessica being with another man, getting
pregnant
by another man. But he’d started this conversation, and he knew he wouldn’t be satisfied until he had all the excruciating details. “When did this happen?”
She swallowed hard. “A few months after you left for college,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.
The timeline hit him like a freight train, knocking the breath from his lungs. “Jesus, Jessie.” Still stunned by her confession, he scrubbed a hand along his jaw, trying to process everything. “Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant? I should have been there for you, especially if there were problems!”
She closed her eyes, and when she opened them again the depths brimmed with such pain and regret. “Because it wasn’t your baby.”
Another blow, but this time it destroyed him on a personal level. He stared at her, his mind warring between disbelief and outrage as he battled the sense of betrayal crushing his chest. “You slept with someone else right after I left for college?” His voice sounded like he’d swallowed crushed gravel.
Tears filled her eyes, and she pressed trembling fingers to her lips.
“Dammit, Jessica, answer me!” he demanded furiously. “I deserve to know the truth.
All
of it.”
Turning pale, Jessica backed up until her legs hit the bed, and she sat down on the mattress. Unable to meet his gaze, she blinked, and tears rolled down her cheeks. “I…I was raped.”
Her voice was so soft and low, Noah thought he’d misheard her. But there was no mistaking the pain etching her features or the agony that radiated off her.
“My mother’s much younger boyfriend at the time, Boyd, was the one who assaulted me,” she continued without any more prompting from Noah, though she still wouldn’t look at him. “I’d been laying out by the pool that day, and afterward, when I came walking through the house to head up to my bedroom, he was in the living room just sitting on the couch. My mother wasn’t home, but she’d given Boyd a key, and he started coming on to me. The things he said to me were so crude…” Her voice trailed off, and she visibly shuddered.
Noah swore beneath his breath. He could only imagine how difficult it was for her to relive that terrifying day, and he attempted to stop her. “Jessie, you don’t have to finish.”
“Yes, I do.” Now that her secret was out, she seemingly wanted to purge herself of the terrifying incident. “When he cornered me and started getting physically aggressive, I fought as hard as I could to get away from him, but he was much bigger and stronger than me, and it was so easy for him to pin me down on the couch and tear my bathing suit off.”
She didn’t give him the details of what happened next, but Noah’s own mind easily filled in the blanks. He clenched his hands into fists at his sides, feeling so damn helpless hearing all this years after the fact.
She swiped away the moisture on her face and drew a deep breath. “Just as he was done, my mother walked in, saw me half-naked on the couch and Boyd pulling his pants back on, and freaked out. Boyd told her that I’d instigated the whole thing and came on to
him,
and, of course, my mother believed him. After calling me some horrible names and blaming me for everything wrong in her life, she slapped me hard, then kicked me out of the house.” Absently Jessica pressed her palm to her cheek, as if remembering the sting of her mother’s hand.
Noah always knew that Jessica’s mother was pure evil and that the two had never had a loving mother–daughter relationship, but it was unfathomable to him that any parent would treat a child so viciously. He sat down next to Jessica on the bed and took her hand in his to offer his silent support.
Finally, she looked at him. Her eyes were dry but puffy, and she looked so young and vulnerable, just as she’d undoubtedly been that day. “At the time, the only place I could think of to go to was Zoe’s in Los Angeles, and that’s where I went. I was so devastated by what had happened, and a part of me wondered if maybe I
had
done something to provoke him. Emotionally, I withdrew from everything and everyone. The guilt and shame were overwhelming, and I just couldn’t bring myself to tell you that another man…that I was raped.”
Noah wasn’t a psychologist, but it made sense to him that she’d suffered from some kind of post-traumatic stress disorder after the assault, which would account for her embarrassment, emotional retreat, and inability to reach out to him.
“I didn’t even know I was pregnant until the night I started hemorrhaging and had these sharp, excruciating pains in my belly.” She paused for a moment, her free hand traveling to her stomach. “Zoe rushed me to the hospital, where I was diagnosed with an ectopic pregnancy. By the time the doctors got me into surgery, the fetus had already ruptured the fallopian tube, damaging my uterus and leaving the surgeon with no option than to give me an emergency hysterectomy. I can never have children.”
“God, Jessie. I’m so sorry.” Paltry words for everything she’d lost. The ache in Noah’s chest expanded, a part of him grieving for what
they’d
lost as a couple, all their hopes and dreams for an idyllic future stolen from them both in a cruel twist of fate. No wonder she never wanted him to know.
She stood up, disconnecting their clasped hands as she stepped away, clearly putting distance between them—emotionally and physically. “So, now you know everything, and it’s about time for you to go to work.”
Heading off to the nightclub for the evening was the last thing Noah wanted to do right now, because he instinctively knew that once he took Jessica home and gave her time alone he was going to lose her for good. He could already feel her pushing him away, evading him, and her reaction frustrated the hell out of him.
Moving to his feet, he slowly crossed to where she stood and gently tucked an errant curl behind her ear. “What happened in the past, as horrible as it was, wasn’t your fault, Jessie. And it certainly doesn’t mean the end of us now.”