No Boundaries (9 page)

Andi’s eyes flashed up to meet Gwen’s, her face turning red. “A date?”

“Yeah, you know, dinner, an evening out, time to get to know you better. A date.”

“We’ve already been through this.” Andi’s tone was gentle, her eyes soft. “I’m not going to go out with you, Gwen.”

Gwen’s insecurity was like a fist around her heart, making it difficult for her to breathe, but she’d heard the faint hesitation—was it regret?—in Andi’s voice, and she wanted to believe Andi wanted to say yes. “Are you seeing anyone?”

Andi bit her lip and looked away.

“I’ll take that as a no. Come on, Andi. Say yes.”

“No, I’m not seeing anyone and I’m not
interested
in seeing anyone,” Andi said flatly.

Gwen didn’t waver. “I know I haven’t been imagining things, Andi. I know there’s something between us, and I know you feel it too. I thought we could just see where this goes. I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t committed to seeing where this could take us.”

Andi sighed. “You’re right. I think you’re very nice and I like you, but I’m just not into dating right now. I told you my life is complicated. I can’t afford to become involved.”

“What are you so afraid of?” The question wasn’t spoken as a challenge. Gwen was simply trying to understand. Something was hurting Andi, and Gwen wanted to make the pain stop. And this would have to be her last attempt—Gwen knew there was a fine line between caring and, well, stalking. And she cared too much about herself to continue to pursue someone who didn’t want her.

“Gwen, please don’t make this more difficult than it already is. I can’t give you what you want. I just can’t do this.”

Gwen heard sincerity in Andi’s voice and saw pain cloud her gaze. She wasn’t going to get the answers she was looking for, but at least Andi wasn’t shutting down this time.

“Okay. If you don’t want it to be a date, we can keep it as friends but I still want to spend time with you. It was so nice having dinner with you the other night—I hoped we could do that again. Besides, I wouldn’t feel right if I didn’t do something to repay you for putting together those plans for me. Please? If you don’t let me, I’ll never be able to ask you for a favor again, and we
are
neighbors.” Gwen flashed what she hoped was a charming—and nondesperate—grin to punctuate her plea.

Andi studied her and seemed to contemplate the idea. “When is the play?”

“Not until next month, but I thought the tickets would give me a reason to come talk to you.” Gwen laughed. “I guess I’m striking out big-time today.”

“Okay. You’re right, there’s no reason we can’t be friends. I’m sorry I’ve been so rude lately, I’m just a very private person and I’m not used to meeting anyone who…” Andi stopped abruptly.

“Anyone who…what?”

Andi shook her head. “Never mind.”

Gwen could tell this was the most she was going to get for the moment. “You don’t have to explain. Friends it is.” Gwen extended her hand in a playful gesture.

“Friends it is.” Andi took her hand and they shook on the deal. But at Gwen’s touch she felt her knees grow weak, and her body tingled at the slight connection between them. This wasn’t going to be easy. She might be able to convince her mind that she and Gwen were only friends, but her body had other ideas.

“Listen,” Andi said, no longer having the strength to keep pushing Gwen away. If they were going to be friends, she had to act like one. “Since we’re going to be friends, I was wondering if you’d like someone to show you around, you know, check out the local trails and the lake and stuff like that.”

“That would be great. With all the work I have been putting into the house and trying to gear up to start my new job, I admit I’ve been a bit out of the loop.”

Andi cocked her head to the side curiously. “What is it you do exactly?” Andi felt more relaxed when she stopped fighting with herself, and now she didn’t want Gwen to leave.

“I’ll be focused on some research involving the emerald ash borer.”

“The emerald what?”

“Sorry. It is a nasty insect that’s been introduced to this country from Asia. It’s destroying the ash trees. We’re trying to learn more about how we can control the pest and will be tracking what areas it’s moving into. I spend most of my time buried in data. So far the emerald has been found in a few counties near here but hasn’t shown up here yet.”

“I see,” Andi said, genuinely worried about the trees. “Sounds serious.”

“It is.”

Andi was intrigued. She had no idea there were things out there killing her beloved trees. She was alarmed by the memory of the devastation the area had suffered from the pine beetle a few years earlier.

“Sorry if that was a mood killer,” Gwen said, cutting off Andi’s melancholy train of thought, “but what did you have in mind when you asked about my lack of local exploration?”

“I do a little kayaking on the lake and the Clinch River, and I thought you might like to go out on the water with me.” Andi suddenly felt silly. She couldn’t believe she was actually asking Gwen out, sort of, and right after turning her down flat. But they had agreed to be friends, hadn’t they?

Gwen took a moment before answering. The awkward silence and Gwen’s appraising look made Andi nervous, and she shifted her gaze.

“I’d love to go out on the water with you. It would be nice to have someone show me around.”

Andi smiled. “How do you feel about this weekend? I thought we could go out Sunday morning and then head back to my house and fire up the grill.” Excitement surged through her as if every nerve ending was at attention. It felt good.

“That would be great. You tell me when.”

They settled the details as Andi playfully teased Zeek.

Zeek suddenly stiffened, her giant head swinging around as the sound of two dogs barking outside caught her attention. She bellowed an answering bark, pulling at her lead and almost toppling Gwen over.

Andi brushed her hands through her hair and sighed. “Guess that’s it for me today.”

“Don’t take it personally. I think she has attention deficit disorder.”

“Maybe.” Andi chuckled. “I think she’s sweet.”

Gwen grinned. “What are you doing for dinner tonight?”

“Nothing really. I just planned to heat up some soup or something and do a little baking for the shop.”

“Well, I’ve been dying to get out of the house. Some local guys told me of a place to have dinner and play some pool. Would you like to go?” Gwen knew she was taking a risk, but Andi’s guard was down and she wanted to take advantage of the moment. She tried to hide her nervousness by tugging Zeek’s leash and messing with her collar.

Andi stiffened.

Gwen recognized the reaction and knew she’d overstepped, knew Andi was about to pull away. She had to do something to diffuse the tension. “Of course, if you know something about this place that I don’t, we could go somewhere else. You can choose.”

Gwen thought she could see every muscle in Andi’s body relax just as abruptly as she’d tensed.

“Okay, I’ll go. But you have to promise not to laugh. I don’t normally play pool.”

Gwen laughed. “Deal.” Maybe Andi was finally letting her in. “You sure about this?”

“I’m sure. It’ll be fun.”

Andi smiled, and it warmed Gwen to her core.

Nick’s Place wasn’t crowded. This was Andi’s first visit, although she’d heard of the local favorite, and she felt some relief as she took in the almost empty parking lot. It was only six o’clock, but perhaps she wouldn’t have to deal with a crowd after all. She noticed Gwen watching her as they walked to the door and she tried to hide her trepidation. She hadn’t been out anywhere with another woman in years. And she didn’t like public places. Despite her unease, she wanted to be there. She couldn’t hide forever. And most of all, she wanted to be with Gwen.

“Ready?” Gwen asked as she reached for the door.

Andi nodded. She felt Gwen’s hand brush lightly against her back as she followed her inside. The touch was comforting, almost possessive, and Andi realized she liked it. She had never felt so attuned to another woman before, and she wanted to feel more of Gwen’s touch. Gwen was attentive and sweet and, despite being overly assertive at times, compassionate. Andi had seen the glimmer of concern in her eyes and how easily she could be hurt despite her attempts to appear in control and charming. The more she learned about Gwen, the more captivating she became.

Andi looked around, taking in her surroundings. The room was bathed in the glow of dim light emanating from hanging lights positioned just above the pool tables that lined the main floor area as they entered the bar. The felt on the pool tables was red, not the usual green Andi was used to. The place was more like a restaurant than a bar, and Andi relaxed a little.

A young blond woman who looked to be in her early twenties came to the table they had chosen at the end of the room closest to the last pool table.

“Hey. What can I get you to drink?”

They each ordered a light beer and watched the young woman bounce around to the bar to get their drinks. Andi glanced around the room nervously.

“Would you like to tell me what’s bothering you?” Gwen asked placing a hand on Andi’s wrist.

Andi jumped at the touch. She was wound so tight she could snap. As much as she wanted to have a good time with Gwen, she was exposed and reflexively defensive in the unfamiliar surroundings. She hated that Gwen was feeling that. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, you don’t seem very comfortable. You don’t seem to like it here.”

“I’m sorry. It isn’t that. I’m not used to going out.”

“You mean with a woman?”

“No. Well, yes. What I mean is that I don’t usually go out at all. I guess I’m a little out of practice.” The admission made her feel lacking, and she wondered what Gwen would think when she found out just how restricted her life really was.

“You mean you just spend all your time in Norris?”

“Pretty much,” Andi answered sheepishly. She knew the reasons for her solitude were valid, but the idea of explaining herself now made her feel like a coward. She knew she was allowing fear to stifle her life, and being with Gwen made her realize what she had been missing.

“Why?”

“I have my work. Everything I need is close by. I guess there isn’t much need for me to go anywhere else. It’s hard to explain.”

“That’s okay. I have the time. Try me.”

Andi saw the sincerity in Gwen’s eyes and thought for a moment that she could drown in the twin pools of blue. But this was not a topic she wanted to explore, not now. Right now all she wanted was to enjoy the woman she was with and have a good time. How did she explain something so terrible it belonged in a horror film? How did she tell Gwen that she could never have a normal life? “No. I really don’t want to get into it tonight.”

Gwen studied the pleading look in Andi’s eyes, longing to reach across the table and brush her fingers across the soft skin of her cheek. Watching the passage of emotions play across Andi’s face as she spoke had gotten to Gwen, and she found herself leaning in, wanting to be closer to Andi, wanting to touch her. Right now she wanted to soothe the lost and vulnerable look she saw in Andi’s eyes.

“Okay then, let’s try to relax and enjoy the special occasion. I guess I should feel honored you came out with me. Maybe you just needed the right friend to come along and shake up your routine a little. You know, since this isn’t a date and all.”

Andi smiled faintly.

Gwen decided to lighten the mood. “Let’s play pool.” She got up and fished quarters from her pocket.

Three games later, the competition was rising. Andi’d had a rough start but quickly began to show some skill. Gwen watched as Andi leaned into her shot, her focus steady as she scoped out the path of the ball. She moved behind Andi, appreciating the view. Andi’s long legs looked good in jeans and boots. For the next shot, Andi moved around the table, and Gwen noticed the way her shirt parted when she leaned over the table, revealing her tantalizing cleavage and the line of soft lace that caressed her breasts.

Gwen kept imagining her lips pressed against the supple flesh. She bit her tongue when she realized she had unconsciously licked her lips. She looked up to find Andi watching her. Gwen smirked, raising her eyebrows, confidently acknowledging what she had been thinking. They might have agreed to be friends, but that didn’t mean she could just turn off her attraction to Andi. There was no harm in looking.

Andi looked away, walked back to the table, and retrieved her beer.

Gwen continued to circle the table, checking out the options for her next shot. She knew Andi was watching her. A few shots later she strolled up to Andi who sat on her stool, waiting for her turn. Gwen allowed her hand to brush ever so gently against Andi’s thigh as she handed her the pool cue. She was enjoying Andi’s new playfulness. Every brush of Andi’s hand, every teasing smile, every unguarded glance gave Gwen a rush of pleasure building into the steady thrum of desire. She wanted to play her fingers through Andi’s hair where the subtle curls graced the edge of her face. She wanted to kiss the tender flesh below her ear and smell the tantalizing fragrance that was uniquely Andi. Andi was close enough to touch, and Gwen found herself leaning forward until her lips were only inches away. She could feel the heat of Andi’s breath, and Andi’s eyes grew dark and stormy.

“You win. I scratched on the eight ball. I guess I lost my concentration there at the end. If you want to play again, it’s your break.” Gwen tried to sound nonchalant, but inside her heart was racing.

Andi reached for the pool cue and Gwen made sure their fingers brushed. When she caught Andi’s gaze, saw a glint of attraction flicker across Andi’s face, and Andi didn’t look away, Gwen had to take the chance. She let her hand slide down the pool stick and placed her palm lightly on Andi’s knee.

Andi drew in a sharp breath, surprised by her own response to Gwen’s touch. She was sure she had caught Gwen looking at her breasts earlier, and Gwen hadn’t even flinched when she knew she was caught. Andi found the confidence dangerously attractive and wasn’t able to even feign irritation. She liked knowing Gwen was looking at her. Her face warmed as physical need began to resonate through her with each pulse of her heart. She wanted to believe she could just be friends with Gwen, but obviously being in the same room with her was enough to send her hormones into overdrive.

Gwen smiled, making Andi’s pulse jolt to a pounding rhythm that she didn’t even experience when running. When Gwen handed her the pool cue, and their fingers brushed, Andi thought she had been shocked, the sensation was so electric. Now she could feel Gwen’s fingers tighten on her knee with just enough pressure to send a jolt straight to her groin.

“What are you doing?” Andi asked, trying to sound unaffected.

Gwen’s smile only broadened. “Just being friendly.”

“Ha!” Andi scoffed. “I don’t know about where you come from, but the friends I know don’t touch like that.”

“Hmm. Okay, you got me there. But was it so bad?”

Andi took a deep breath, the muscles in her stomach tightened, and her heart pulsed a rhythm against her skin. “No. It wasn’t bad,” she admitted. Honestly, the touch had seemed so natural she had felt it all the way to her core. In that instant the past, all her fear, the people around them, all receded. Gwen was her only focus.

“Hello, ladies,” a rough, deep male voice rumbled from behind Andi. Her whole body tensed as she whipped around to confront the source.

He was a large man, tall and broad shouldered. His head and face were clean-shaven except for a bush of hair growing in a point from his chin, too wild to be a goatee. He wore faded jeans and a black T-shirt with heavy motorcycle boots. His eyes were the cold gray of steel.

Panic rose in Andi’s chest like a vise, threatening to squeeze the life from her body. Suddenly she couldn’t force air into her lungs and she felt all the blood drain from her face. The room was closing in on her.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I just wanted to see if you wanted to play my partner and me in a friendly game of pool.”

At that, a second man appeared. His hand snaked possessively around the big man’s waist and rubbed his stomach.

“Hey, girls,” he said playfully, his voice softer and higher in pitch than the first man’s.

Gwen stepped closer to Andi, putting herself between Andi and the men.

“Hey, fellas. You go ahead, I think we’re sitting this one out, but we’d love to watch you play.”

“Oh, girl, I don’t think that is anything a lady should watch,” the smaller man said with a playful harmonic laugh. “And don’t mind Bear,” he said as he pinched his partner’s nipple through his shirt. “He’s harmless. I’m David and this is Mark. Most people call me Boo, and Mark is Bear.”

“Pleasure to meet you,” Gwen said as she shook both men’s hands.

Andi felt Gwen’s hand press against her hip where Gwen had planted it the moment the tension had whipped through her like a shot.

“I’m Gwen and this is Andi.”

“Hmm,” David said as he stepped back, running his eyes up and down both women. “You’re cute.” He grinned mischievously and bounced over to the pool table where he slapped Mark on the ass.

Gwen moved Andi back onto her stool and stood in front of her so her hips pressed against Andi’s thighs. She placed her palm against Andi’s face.

“Andi?” Gwen asked softly, lifting Andi’s face to look at her. Andi’s eyes shifted, still unfocused. She felt Gwen’s fingers brush across her cheek and gently cup her face.

“Andi, are you all right?”

Andi blinked, confused about what was happening.

“Andi?”

Andi licked her lips and tried to back away, but she was already pressed against the corner. “Sorry. I’m okay. I was just a little startled. I’m fine now.”

Andi moved her head to pull away from Gwen’s hands. Gwen’s fingers brushed lightly across her skin leaving trails of heat that lingered long after the contact was lost. She looked around the room, expecting to see anger, contempt, resentment, and hatred on the faces of the men around her. She felt confused as she watched the big man run his hand along the other’s backside. The scene was a stark contrast to what she had expected. She furrowed her brow, confused.

“They’re gay?” she asked, astounded, looking back at Gwen for confirmation.

Gwen stood close, watching her, her hand holding possessively to Andi’s hip. Andi knew Gwen had seen her fear.

Gwen nodded.

Andi tried to smile. She was embarrassed that Gwen had seen her weakness. She moved her hand to cover Gwen’s. Despite her self-consciousness, she was comforted by Gwen’s gentleness and her unhesitant protectiveness.

“I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry. How about telling me what happened just then. I get it that you don’t like to talk about personal stuff, but I want you to feel safe with me.”

Andi pressed her hand lightly against Gwen’s, allowing her fingers to curl around and take Gwen’s hand in her own, pulling it away from her body, not wanting to lose complete contact. Gwen did make her feel safe and she needed to explain. “I was hurt once, a long time ago. I almost died. It still bothers me sometimes. It’s hard for me to trust people because of what happened to me.” She squeezed Gwen’s hand. “But I do feel safe with you, Gwen.” Andi smiled uncomfortably. “See, I told you my life was complicated.” She knew she had given Gwen the CliffsNotes version of her past, and she hoped Gwen would accept that as enough for now.

“Thank you for telling me.” Gwen smiled and squeezed Andi’s hand back. “This feels nice.”

Andi’s face warmed, but she didn’t move her hand away. She kept her eyes locked on Gwen’s, mesmerized by the intensity of her gaze as she watched her pupils dilate until there was only the faintest ring of blue. She felt the heat rise into her cheeks and knew she was blushing. God, what was she doing? She pulled her hand away, reaching for her drink. She needed to put some distance between them.

Gwen took a step back and pulled her stool closer to Andi. “Do you feel like staying for a while, or do you want to go?”

Thoughts swirled around in Andi’s mind, making her dizzy. If she stayed, she had to face her fear and engage in social contact with the two men. If she chose to leave, she would be alone with Gwen, and she would most likely want to know more about what had happened in her past. Not only that, she would have to face her ever-growing need to be closer to Gwen. There was no denying the sexual energy between them. Andi wasn’t sure she was ready to face any of these things.

“It’s still early. I’m okay staying a while longer if you want.”

Gwen smiled mischievously. “You wouldn’t be afraid of going home with me, now would you?”

Andi returned the smile. “Maybe a little,” she stated shyly, dropping her gaze.

Gwen leaned in to Andi until her lips were almost touching Andi’s ear. “You never have to be afraid of me, Andi. Nothing will ever happen between us that you don’t want.”