No Child of Mine (12 page)

Even more thrilled than she’d expected to be, Alex decided not to remind Gabby that her old room was stuffed full of their parents’ belongings, since it might change her mind about staying. She’d just make sure it was all safely stored out of sight by the time Saturday came round. In fact, feeling so uplifted by the prospect of entertaining her sister and aunt, she decided to make a start right away.

She didn’t bother opening any boxes or bags as she began moving them out, there was no point when she already knew what they contained. She simply transported as much as she could into drawers and cupboards in her old room, and pushed the heavy suitcases under the bed. She felt glad now that she hadn’t torn down Gabby’s old posters of Take That and the Backstreet Boys, or thrown out any of the concert memorabilia that she had once prized so highly. Gabby might enjoy going through some of it again, if she had time, a little meander down memory lane that would make her laugh and possibly even share with Alex some of the secrets she’d had back then. At the time, being the younger sister, and a bit of a nightmare, she’d been strictly banned from Gabby’s room, and told absolutely nothing at all. Had Gabby but known it Alex used to sneak in anyway when Gabby was out, not because she was interested in all her stupid stuff, as she’d called it back then, but simply because it wasn’t allowed. Anyway, it wasn’t as if Gabby could have secrets that were ever going to top her own, because Gabby hadn’t found out she was adopted, had she? Or that her real father was a psychopathic maniac who’d wiped out most of his family and was
still on the loose
. Or (though this had come later) that her real mother had survived and hadn’t bothered to come and find her.

‘Hey, what are you doing?’ Jason said, arriving at the top of the stairs to find her trying to force the wardrobe doors closed in her old room.

‘Hiding my parents’ stuff,’ she explained. ‘Gabby’s probably coming to stay on Saturday night. Isn’t that great?’

‘Yeah, I guess so,’ he replied, lending a shoulder. Once the doors were shut and firmly locked, he turned to take
her hands in his. ‘How much of all that did you hear, earlier?’ he asked, his eyes showing his concern.

She shrugged as she tried to make light of it. ‘Enough to be able to tell Gabby that you’re not coming on Sunday.’

Nodding, as though having expected as much, he said, ‘I’m sorry, but I guess with all things considered, it’s probably for the best.’

Unable to disagree, she slipped her arms round his neck and kissed him on the mouth. ‘I could always take Heidi and Tom,’ she suggested, ‘if you wanted to stay here and have some quality time with Tiffany.’

He gave it some thought, but in the end sighed and shook his head. ‘It’s a lovely offer, but I don’t think they’d go without her, and even if they did she’d manage to kick up somehow. No, it’s best if we leave it this time.’

Secretly relieved, she kissed him again and felt the pleasure of being at home, just the two of them at last, with the little of what remained of the evening all to themselves. ‘So what will you do with them while I’m gone?’ she asked.

Turning to gaze across at the darkened window, he said, ‘I haven’t taken them to my parents’ for a while, so I guess we’ll go there. We might even stay over. She’ll like that.’

Surprised, Alex said, ‘Don’t they have school the next morning?’

‘Yes, but they can always take their stuff with them. Let’s see what Gina says.’ As he drew her closer and pressed his mouth back to hers she gave herself completely to the moment, determined not to let Tiffany’s imagined smirk of satisfaction have more than a fleeting appearance. Not only had the girl managed to come between her father and Alex for the day on Sunday, it was looking as though she’d be able to pull it off for the whole night too.

Two up to you, Gina, she was thinking as she followed Jason back out to the landing. Except he was here, with her, most of the time, she reminded herself as she tightened her hand on his, and instead of feeling angry with Tiffany, she should remember that the child was the victim of a broken home. It naturally made her difficult, confused, unable to focus on anything but herself, much the same as
many of the children in Alex’s caseload. And yet Tiffany wasn’t the same, because she had more love than many of Alex’s troubled children could ever dream of, and a decent home in a pleasant and safe part of town with a large extended family who’d always be there for her if anything were ever to go wrong.

She had no idea how lucky she was, but children who were properly loved and cared for never did. And why should they? It would be wrong for them to be afraid and worried about anything more than the minor issues that came up in their worlds. Yet at the same time, how could Alex not feel more concern for the tender little souls who were out there suffering even now and who, God help them, had no one to turn to, or to save them, apart from a system that in some cases was tragically too late?

Ottilie was sobbing so hard she could barely catch her breath. She was sitting on the floor behind her bed, clinging to Boots, shuddering and gasping, desperate and afraid. A horrible thing had happened to her; she was bruised and bleeding, she didn’t know what to do.

Erica was cracking apart inside and aching with loathing. Voices were echoing all the way through her, resonating across the years, wrapping themselves around her like choking hands.
You shouldn’t have been born. I should never have had you. I SHOULD NEVER HAVE HAD YOU, YOU FILTHY LITTLE BITCH
.

Last night, or was it earlier, Erica had climbed up the walls, across the ceiling and back down to the floor. Round and round, up and down, she’d been unable to stop. Waves had come crashing in from the sea, sweeping her away on a terrible tide. She’d tried to hold on, but there was nothing to hold on to. She’d screamed and screamed as Brian shook and punched her, except it wasn’t Brian, it was her stepfather, trying to kill her. His fists were like rocks smashing into her. She was naked and wet, drowning, drowning, gasping for air. He roared at her, over and over, grabbed her hair and forced her to look at him.

She’d passed out with her body convulsing to the tune
of her heart, but she’d woken up, safe in her room, where her stepfather never came.

Suddenly she was back in Ottilie’s room. Something had pushed her forward, a force inside that didn’t belong to her, and now she was grabbing Ottilie and shaking her. ‘That’s enough,’ she shouted. ‘That’s enough, do you hear me?
Stop crying
.’

Ottilie’s head went down as she buried her face in Boots. Her tiny frame continued to jerk with the sobs she was trying desperately to hold in.

‘What are you doing?’ Brian demanded.

Erica rounded on him. ‘Get away,’ she hissed. ‘Don’t you dare come near us.’

‘You’re terrifying her,’ he shouted.

For an instant Erica appeared astonished, then her head went back as she laughed.

He grabbed her hand, but she snatched it away. ‘I’m terrifying her,’ she cried, her eyes glittering wildly. ‘
I’m
terrifying her.’

‘Look at her,’ he challenged.

Ottilie was cowering even further behind the bed, her hands covering her head, blood trickling down one leg.

‘I didn’t do that to her,’ Erica snarled. ‘
You
did that to her, you fucking pervert ...’ The punch to her jaw silenced her.

‘Get a grip on yourself,’ he growled.

Erica laughed again, loudly and shrilly.

Shoving her on to the landing, he dragged her to her own room and pushed her inside. ‘Just remember,’ he said, his face an inch from hers, ‘if it weren’t for Ottilie you’d be in prison now, so stay out of my business. Do you hear me? Keep taking your drugs, do as you’re told and
stay out of my business
.’

Going back to Ottilie’s room he scooped her into his arms and held her close. Her limbs trembled against him, sending tremors to every part of him. ‘Ssh, ssh,’ he soothed, stroking her hair. ‘Everything’s going to be all right. There’s nothing to be afraid of.’

Ottilie continued to shake and shudder.

‘I showed you on the computer how the other girls do it,’ he said kindly, ‘and they didn’t make a fuss, did they?’

Ottilie kept her face averted as more tears streamed down her cheeks.

‘I expect it hurt them the first time too, but you saw how much they like it now. You’re going to like it too, my angel, I promise you. And it makes Daddy happy. You do want to make me happy, don’t you?’

Ottilie couldn’t answer. She didn’t understand.

‘There’s a good girl,’ he murmured. ‘Now we’ll go and put you in the bath shall we, get you nice and clean, and then you can come and sleep in my bed tonight. That’ll be nice, won’t it? You can bring Boots too, if you like, because I don’t expect he’ll want to be left on his own, will he?’

Chapter Five

ALEX WINCED AT
the noise that assailed her as she pushed through the swing doors into the office. Everyone was talking at once, and apart from those tied up on phones, it didn’t take long to work out that the others were all jabbering about the same thing. A rumour had reached their shores that Dean Valley Council was planning to merge the Kesterly hubs, thereby creating one supercentre for the area’s social services, to be based in the southern district – and up to
twenty
jobs would go.

Hearing the news Alex felt a judder of nerves go through her. Though the new location would be good for her, in that it was closer to home, it wasn’t going to mean very much if she ended up as one of the twenty. God, what a horrible thought. She loved her job, in many ways she
was
her job, so it would be like a character amputation if it were taken away. She couldn’t imagine doing anything else, and certainly didn’t want to; even less did she want to abandon any of her kids. It was unthinkable, simply undoable, especially when some of them had already been abandoned once, even several times, in their tragic little lives. Then there was the question of how she’d earn a living if she was forced to go. Social work was all she was qualified for, so she’d have to seek a place with another council, somewhere else in the country. But what about Jason? He wouldn’t want to leave his kids, or his clients, and no way could she go without him.

Typical, Alex, get yourself all wound up about something you don’t even know is true
.

‘There’s a union meeting the Saturday after next,’ someone shouted from the back of the room. ‘We’ll have to go.’

Dumping her bag on her desk, Alex was about to ask where the meeting was when the doors to the office banged open and an incandescent woman with wild red hair and even wilder eyes began ranting at Tamsin Green.

‘If you think you can do so much fucking better,’ she raged, shoving two grubby boys forward, ‘then be my guest. Here they are. I’m sick to fucking death of you lot coming round my house, criticising everything I do, sticking your fucking noses in where they’re not wanted, and I’m sick of these little bastards too.’

Clearly enjoying the moment, the boys began pulling faces and making gestures to say she was off her head.

Tamsin was rushing towards them, trying to calm the woman down and ushering her into a meeting room, while grabbing the boys too, and ignoring the V signs they were making behind their mother’s back.

‘Nothing like a soothing ease into the day,’ someone quipped, making everyone laugh.

Finding she was still worked up about the possible loss of her job, Alex quickly reminded herself again that absolutely nothing had been confirmed yet, and anyway, even if it was true, she might not be amongst those chosen to go, so best to come down from the ceiling. She was good at what she did, was dedicated, and hardly anyone ever complained about her – apart from Wendy, who complained about everyone. No, she would be fine, she felt sure of it, especially when there were some in this hub who were known by everyone to be in the wrong job – which reminded her she was supposed to be covering for Ben today. What a joy!

Picking up her bag she carried it over to his desk and dumped it down again. Whatever new cases came in during this spell on duty, she’d already made up her mind that they could
not
be added to her caseload. She just didn’t have the time to take on any more, so they’d have to go to someone else. Though she knew she’d stand more chance of offloading if Tommy was around, she was fully prepared to fight Wendy if she had to, in fact she might just enjoy it. On the other hand, if redundancies were in the offing, there was every chance Wendy would be involved in
deciding who had to go, so it might be a good idea to try the impossible and stay on the right side of her.

Did Wendy actually have a right side?

After settling herself between the two other duty workers, Carmel and Janet, she was about to fire up the computer in front of her when the phone started to ring. Somehow, mysteriously, the other two managed to disappear, leaving her to deal with whatever fresh problem was waiting to cough itself down the line and into her world.

‘Hello, children’s services,’ she sighed into the phone. She hadn’t even had a coffee yet, so one of the absconders had better bring her one or this would be the last call she was taking.

There was a moment’s silence, giving her hope that it might be a telemarketer with a stammer who she could simply hang up on, but then a woman’s gravelly voice came down the line. ‘I’m trying to find out if anyone’s been to check on the little girl on North Hill yet. I rang before, and I spoke to the police yesterday. They said they were going to pass it on to you.’

Immediately feeling guilty for having forgotten all about Neil Osmond’s call last evening, Alex said, ‘Can you tell me who you are, please?’

‘It don’t matter who I am. I just wants you to make sure someone’s going to check on that kiddie, because I’m telling you, something’s not right in that house, and if the kind of thing that’s going on there is what I think it is, then it’s up to you lot to get her out of there.’

Digging into her bag for a pen (wasn’t it just like Ben to go off leaving his desk locked?) Alex said, ‘Can you tell me what you think is going on?’