No Place for Magic (18 page)

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Authors: E. D. Baker

BOOK: No Place for Magic
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"This worse than first prince," said Grunella.

"First prince may be dragon, too," Fatlippia said. "Maybe whole family is."

Grunella shuddered. "I not want dragon husband. Cannot tell what to do."

"Then why marry human?" said Fatlippia. When she sighed, she actually sounded sad. "Maybe marriage not for us. Being spinster not so bad. Still have one another."

The last sound I heard as the troll queen stomped from the Great Hall was the mournful wailing of the other three heads.

Sixteen

I
f the troll queen hadn't been so awful, I might have felt sorry enough for her to help her find someone else, but she was mean and nasty, and I wouldn't want to inflict her on anyone I knew, unless . . . The most wonderful idea popped into my head, and the more I thought about it, the more I liked it. The queen wanted a prince for a husband, and I knew the perfect man for her. He would be just what she wanted, and she would be just what he deserved.

The troll queen was about to try bashing down the door with her clubs when I found her. Rather than have another door to fix, I asked Haywood to remove his spell. Everyone else stayed behind while I followed the troll queen outside.

"What you want?" she snapped at me as her trolls assembled behind her. I was still a dragon, so they were careful to keep their distance.

I made myself comfortable on the paving stones and wrapped my tail around me. "Just because you can't marry Eadric or Bradston doesn't mean that you can't marry anyone," I said. "I happen to know an available prince who would be just right for you. You've already met him. It's that young man, Jorge, who came to see you through a magic mirror. Do you think he would do?"

Grunella's eyes lit up while Ingabinga and Tizzy began talking at once. "He do fine!" said Tizzy. "How we find him?" asked Ingabinga. "We not know where he live."

"But I do," I replied.

"I not sure this idea good," said Fatlippia.

Tizzy stuck out her lower lip. "It not fair. We always do what Fatlippia want."

Grunella nodded. "We going even if Fatlippia not like!"

Fatlippia seemed surprised by their vehemence. "If that what three heads really want. . . ," she said.

The other heads cheered. Following their lead, the troll army shouted and stomped their feet even though they had no idea what was going on. When the ruckus died down, Fatlippia turned to me and said, "Where you say prince live?"

"I'll tell you, but first I want the other ball like the one I broke," I said.

"I not tell. . .," began Fatlippia, but I wasn't looking at her. Tizzy's eyes had darted to the commanding troll standing in front of the troll queen. He shoved one of his hands behind his back, but not before I saw the reflection of something shiny.

"Let me see that," I said, uncurling my tail and getting to my feet. When the troll looked like he was about to turn and bolt, I stretched my neck and grabbed him by his leather tunic, then shook him until he dropped the ball. The troll queen dove for it, but I was there first, stepping on it with a loud
crack!

"Look for the prince in East Aridia," I said, using my claws to scrape the shattered ball into a pile. "Go over the mountains and cross the River Sludge. His castie is in the city of Raveen."

Fatlippia scowled at me, but it was Grunella who said, "We go now. It time troll queen have husband!"

I remained a dragon until the last of the trolls had crossed the drawbridge and were well on their way to East Aridia. Repairs to the castle had already begun when Eadric found me in the courtyard, a human once again. Hand in hand, we retreated to the sheltered base of an undamaged tower to steal a few moments alone.

"When was the last time I told you that I love you?" I asked after I'd kissed him quite thoroughly.

"At least a few hours ago. I must warn you that my parents can't wait to thank you for getting rid of the trolls, but I'm going to keep you to myself a while longer."

"That sounds good to me," I said, leaning into another kiss.

"You know," Eadric said eventually. "I think my father likes you. He can't stop saying nice things about 'that wonderful Emma.'"

"And what about your mother?"

"I think she's getting tired of Bradston and his tricks. I actually heard her say, 'I've had just about enough of you, young man.'"

"Is that so?" I said. "Tell me, when is your mother's birthday?"

"In a few months. Why?"

"Because if she can manage to be nice to us from now until then, I just might have the perfect gift for her. What do you think she'd say if I ended the spell and gave her some time to herself?"

"I'd say that she'd be mad if she found out that you cast it in the first place."

"And if I told her that if she wasn't nice, I'd do it all over again?"

"Then I think you'd have the nicest mother-in-law in the world."

"Mmm," I murmured as he kissed me again. "That would be perfect. I already have the very best husband in the world."

"And you, my love, are the most unpredictable wife!"

The tinkle of wind chimes announcing the return of our fairy guests made us both look up. Our chance to be alone was going to be shorter than either of us had hoped.

I sighed and brushed an errant dragon scale from Eadric's tunic. "Someday when we have lots of time, remind me to tell you what you mean to me."

Eadric tilted my head back so he could gaze into my eyes. "I can tell you what you mean to me with just one word."

"Let me guess," I said, smiling up at him. "Maybe I make you happy because you no longer have to enter kissing contests to find the best kisser? Do I bring excitement into your life because I can whisk you away to exotic lands on my magic carpet? Or do you find me delightful because I can conjure food whenever you're hungry?"

"No, that's n o t . . . Wait, what was that last one?"

I laughed and shook my head. "Never mind. So tell me in one word, what
do
I mean to you?"

"That's easy," said Eadric. "Everything!"

E. D. BAKER

made her international debut with
The Frog Princess,
which was a Book Sense Children's Pick and has been optioned for an animated movie. Since then she has written four other books in the series:
Dragon's Breath, Once Upon a Curse, No Place for Magic,
and
The Salamander Spell.
A mother of three and grandmother of one, Ms. Baker has had many interesting jobs—teacher, parrot caretaker, member of the Red Cross Disaster Team—but her true love is writing. She lives in Maryland, where she provides a home for three horses, two dogs, three cats, and three goats named Malcolm, Seth, and Ruben.

www.edbakerbooks.com

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