No Second Thoughts (Seven Devils MC Book 2) (9 page)

Still not connecting to her old feelings, she could sense new ones in their place. He was such a handsome, forthright guy. Hot too--there was something about a guy on a motorcycle. Why was he alone anyway? Perhaps he was not. There seemed to be affection between the host and him.

Maybe he wasn't alone. Maybe she didn't lose it when she hit her head, but when she first laid eyes on him appearing out of nowhere on the hanging-by-a-thread bridge when she stupidly decided to make that shortcut. She lost all objectivity when she met him. On the spot forfeited her validity with the very dangerous, brutal Norte Mexicali. They paid her a lot of money to kill Jason Fowler. But she saw him and felt his body near hers, and, from that second, was chasing the promise chemistry like theirs brought.

“Everything seems to be okay here,” he said.  “Are you sore?”

“Not really,” Blanche replied, filled with a general regret. She was most definitely beginning to feel what she had felt before.

“Gretchen has food for us. I am going to eat and then go to bed. I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow.”

“What’s happening tomorrow?” she asked.

“I’m leaving. Don’t worry. You’re safe here. Some of the other guys will be here by the time I leave,” he answered in his pleasant but neutral tone.

“Leaving for where?” she asked, trickling with panic. She didn’t want him to go just as she was getting to be her old self.

He regarded her sternly, “You’re safe Blanche. That’s all that should concern you. Come,” he stood and helped her up even though she really didn’t need it. “Let’s eat. You should do what you can to help with the clean up.  You have been really sedentary for the past few weeks. You need to start moving around. And plus,” he began, but hesitated.

“What?” she asked.

“Well, I think it’s time you started giving back a little.”

Blanche sounded him, “I have to ask you something,” she said.

“What?” he replied.

“All that back at the hospital, where you were like ‘you don’t like me anymore?’ Was that all crap or did you mean it?”

“It was a question,” Jason glared.

“It didn’t mean anything then,” Blanche felt her lower lip start to quiver.

He hovered over her, crowding her. This time she soaked up the feel of his body. “What did you want it to mean, Miss Herrera?”

“Honestly? That you care,” she folded her arms around herself.

“Well, at the time I said it, it meant I cared. I loved you. I am in love with you still, but I am working real hard to fix that. Because in the process of keeping you safe, I heard things I really didn’t want to hear you say...namely bargaining with that really bad excuse for a doctor about which of my friends you should kill to prove your loyalty.”

“I’ve been through a lot –” she began.

“I get that. But that seems to be the song you sing for everything. I liked it for a while, but then it got really old,” he answered.

“My head –” she replied.

“Does it bother you?” he asked.

“Not half as much as my heart does,” she said. “I want all of this behind us. Please.”

“For once we agree. My generous friend has made us dinner. I don’t care what you’ve been through; please do your best to be gracious.” He waved his hand, “After you.”

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

During dinner, Blanche felt like odd man out. Jason sat across from her, adjacent to Gretchen.  She was so jumbled emotionally. Her sadness over what their current status was was like an avalanche and it was hard to contain herself. Staring down at her food, a beautiful dinner of whole green beans, wild rice, and prawns, the last thing she had was an appetite.

But she didn’t want to rock the boat. In her head, she told herself if she just went along to get along, he would set aside his anger towards her. She almost laughed at that thought, because he was angry that he had heard her talk about picking up her old trade.

Blanche was jealous of Gretchen. Blanche was pretty secure in her own looks. She had a smoking hot body, though she was a bit out of shape from all the rest she had been getting; he was right about that. That just meant she was perfect, not absolute perfection. She had a usual routine of kickboxing, weights, and yoga and she hadn’t gotten to it in a while. And Blanche had a sweet girlish face: big dark eyes with thick, feathery lashes. She had nothing to complain about, but Gretchen looked like the All-American cheerleader. She had the perfect simple hair that didn’t need work. She had the perfect yoga body; Blanche could spot them. She probably never had to watch her weight. She kept her house just so. Cooked. And Jason adored her. Yes; Blanche was jealous.

It was super hard to eat and super hard to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with Gretchen as they washed dishes. She had a dishwasher, but she didn’t believe in using it. To top it all off, Blanche had to withstand Gretchen trying to make small talk with her.

“So, how long have you known Jason?” she asked Blanche.

Blanche wanted to say, “You know very well how long I’ve known him; he filled you in.” But what she said was, “I think I’ve lost track. A little while now.”

“How do you like Gold Creek?” she asked.

Blanche could hardly stand the questions, but she remained polite. “I like it fine. It’s a nice place. It would have been nice to settle there.”

“Oh?” Gretchen asked.  “You’re not settling there?”

That was more than Blanche could bear. She slammed the silverware into the sink water. “What do you want me to say? Am I after him? For the record, I am in love with him! But he doesn’t like me. He likes you. So no I am not staying in Gold Creek and I will be out of your hair forever just as soon as he says I can go.” It was Blanche’s intention to make a grand, dramatic exit, but as she spun on her heel, she stopped dead in her track. There lazing against the wall was Jason, eavesdropping, casual as he pleased. Blanche nearly choked. “Is that what you did in the hospital?”

He didn’t rise to her bait. “Blanche, let’s take a walk.” Blanche didn’t even go to argue with him.  She was embarrassed and upset as it was. “Sis, we’ll be back in a few. Don’t go falling in love with anyone while I am gone,” he teased.

Blanche couldn’t look at him.  She got it. She had been jealous of Gretchen and Gretchen was his sister. She was practically marching in the direction she assumed he would walk. “Hey,” he said.  “Not so fast.” His tone was lighter, but still ambiguous. Blanche wanted him to love her. Night was beginning to fall and mountain elevation made for chilly temperature. Blanche needed a hoodie. Jason caught up with her. “We need to come to an understanding. We are going to be hanging out with each other for a little while longer, if things keep going the way they are going.”

“I thought you were leaving in the morning,” she said, sulking.

“I am, but I will see you again. I have things I need to take care of. And I am not going to have sex with you anymore.”

Blanche stopped. “Yes you are! I am not myself. I know I say that all the time but damn, we are in a weird situation. You have a town full of millionaires, because you are sitting on gold. How can that be normal? You guys are all wanted by a greedy drug cartel. Come on.”

“A greedy drug cartel that pays you very well, I might add,” he said.

“I didn’t take the last draw. I’ve been living on bare bones,” she answered.

Jason scanned her body. “That’s a major commodity, if you ask me,” he answered flirtatiously.

“See? You can’t go saying things like that right after saying you aren’t going to fuck me,” she whined.

“Well, I am sorry. I am not,” he arched a brow.

“You are, too,” she insisted and she reached up and kissed him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, stood on her toes and kissed him. 

And he didn’t resist. At least not at first. He responded with a fierce hunger. It was as though the contact flipped a switch in him and he was now ravenous, trying to devour her. Standing perfectly still, they swayed in the dance of passion in the falling night, reminded of how they were together. They were completely electrified by their own chemistry. 

His moans filled her ears. He had missed her as much as she had missed him. Blanche’s hands swum around the huge expanse of his back. He felt like a Greek sculpture arching and bowing towards her to have just one more taste. Their tongues were furiously playing, straining and twirling to make as much contact – to touch as much as possible. But when she boldly dipped and reached between his legs, he backed up. He broke the kiss. He stopped it all cold.

“What?” she searched.  “Why?”

“You know why,” he answered.

“But we belong together,” she pleaded. “I need you to fuck me.”

“We are sick together. This,” he pointed to both of them. “I thought this was passion. I thought this was love, but I realize now that it is pure craziness.”

“It’s crazy. Love is crazy,” she argued. “Come on. Who have you ever felt this with anyone before?”

His face was somber. “Yeah, until you get another bump on the head?  Jesus, talk about your true colors.”

“I was injured. I didn’t ask to pass out on the street and I didn’t ask for just about the coldest blooded woman to be there when I did.  For Christ’s sakes, Jason. Whether he is a monster or not, he still is a doctor and he explained to me some of the reasons why I went so bonkers over hitting my head. And besides, he said there is no telling what happens with head injuries. He told me about this one time when a patient –”

“Stop,” Jason ordered. “Just stop. This is not like a cartoon where the character hits her head and forgets who she is and then hits her head again to remember. We don’t work.”

“I have to prove myself. That’s all there is to it.”

It was dark now and there were no streetlights in the mountains. Save for a few spotlights in Gretchen’s actual yard, outside was black as pitch.

Blanche was emotional and exhausted and overwhelmed, but she was going to find a way to prove herself to this man, once and for all, so they could get to normal and live happily ever after. But he would have none of it. “Knock it off and come back here. In the house with you. Off to bed. No more drama. Save your strength.”

“You don’t understand,” she rasped. 

And in a rare moment, he let his emotion get the better of him. “I do understand,” his voice was strained. “I do.  Right now, above all else, we have to stop this nonsense and keep a clear head.  We have people wanting to murder us. Me, because I am rich and you, because you are nothing but pure trouble.”

That hurt her to the core. If Blanche heard that once, she heard that a thousand times. Her aunt who tossed her out on the street said things like that to her and worse. “Please take that back. I can’t live knowing you think I am so awful.”

That moved him. “Blanche. Baby. I don’t think you’re awful. I think you need a spanking once in a while. We have to take a break. I can’t fuck you right now.”

“But you will again. I know you will. Right?” she craned her neck and brushed his lips with hers.

“God help me, yes. I probably will,” he said and succumbed. They stood for minutes, making out in the light of a moon that rose up over the trees and lit their way home.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

It was no small gift from the universe that Blanche was able to sleep soundly through the night despite her bed being so empty.  When she and Gretchen stirred, Jason was gone, but coffee was brewing. Gretchen was moved by Blanche’s moping.

“If you didn’t have a bump on your head, I would douse your coffee with some Kentucky bourbon. You poor thing.” She rubbed Blanche’s shoulders. She whispered in her ear, “If it makes you feel any better, my brother had the same look on his face when he told me about you.  Let all this horrible mess pass and see what comes your way.”

Blanche felt just a little ashamed for being jealous of this woman on any level. She was a truly kind person and beautiful woman. Gretchen encouraged her to put on a pair of her hiking boots and to take a real walk with her. She promised they would stop when she got tired. Gretchen had a surprise that she thought Blanche would enjoy. Blanche fantasized that it was Jason waiting for her somewhere, but only for a second.

Blanche agreed, but said only on the condition that Gretchen let them tote a gun. She explained by telling her the
How the Bear Ate the Groceries
story. Gretchen said if it made Blanche feel better and only because she was pretty sure as an assassin for a drug cartel, she knew how to shoot.

“Okay, that was funny,” Blanche said, “but let’s not make jokes about it. I am not that person any more. I promise.”

“I think we all are that person just a little bit. But know that I believe you,” she handed her a 44.

Now Blanche laughed, “You can’t tell me Jason wasn’t used to women being a little feisty.”

“I live up in the mountains pretty much by myself,” said Gretchen. “I live by a shoot first, ask questions later policy. So you carry the weapon and I carry the radiophone. There. I think we are set for our serene walk in the woods.” 

The women laughed. It was nice to be with someone without so much wreckage. They hadn’t taken but a few steps away from the front door when they were confronted.