No Turning Back (Full Circle) (25 page)

We continue our walk, and I go up to my room alone.  The remainder of this week is going to be a blur because the exhibition meet is coming up.  I know it doesn’t count because it’s not official, but for me it’s my first time competing since I walked out on one of my biggest loves, swimming.

Me: You still coming Saturday?

Cash: Yes

Me: Yay! U going 2 go 2 Hank’s w us?

Cash:  as long as I can stay with u

Me: Of course!

Cash: Talked to Dustin today

And with that text, I decide to call Cash.

“Hey Char-coal.  I should have called you, but I wanted to get all the details first.”

“Alright, I’m listening.”

“Dustin said he thinks that it has to be either Mark or Maddox.  They both knew each other before going to Southern.  Plus the fact that Mark’s family has a house close to our hometown makes him a little higher on the suspect list.  Nothing concrete though.”

“Okay, how would they know Dylan though?  I mean it’s not like he went to school here.  Heck, I didn’t know I was going to school here until last minute.”

“Charley, I don’t know, but one thing I keep thinking about is recruitment.  Didn’t he visit schools?  Maybe they met that way?  Let’s just keep working on it.  How’d the project go?”

“Awesomesauce!  Well, except for me having a million butterflies, but the movie was a hit.  I’d hate to go after us.  Oh, and I don’t think you have to worry about Joe.  He used the word
friend
in his speech in class.  You don’t think he’s gay do you?”

“I seriously doubt that he’s gay. The fact that he has called you friend makes me happy just so you know, but it’s okay to be friends.  Maybe that’s why he’s there.  If it was more than friends, things could get cloudy.  He wouldn’t be able to look out for you.”

“That’s true, but why give up all his free time to protect me?  I mean most guys our age are on the prowl for a piece of fresh meat.  I guess Joe’s not like that.  I guess I better get off here.  I gotta get to practice.  Love you.”

“Love you, too.  I’ll see you Saturday.”

I hang up with Cash, grab my bag and go to practice.  The remainder of the week is routine. Wake up, practice, class, practice, go to bed.  By Friday afternoon, I’m getting antsy.  My parents, Tessa, Cash, and Joe will all be here tomorrow to see my debut at Southern.  I can’t help but feel ecstatic. 

Friday after supper in the café, we decide to have a girls’ night in since we have curfew and have to be well-rested for tomorrow.  Georgia, Tori, Anna, Caroline, Hayden, Sarah, and I all pile into my room to watch a chick flick and eat popcorn.  At 11:55, everyone goes back to their room to make curfew.  I wonder what would happen if we were still in my room. I doubt she’d care.  As I’m thinking those exact thoughts, Emily and Mallorie, our team captains, knock on my door.

“Hey, y’all!  I’m here.”

Mallorie looks at Emily before pushing on the door.  What is she doing?  “You alone, Charley?  We know that Joe stays with you.”

“He’s not here.  Actually, I haven’t seen him since this morning even though that’s none of your business.”

“Just remember he can’t be in here after we leave.  Got it?”  I shake my head yes and close the door.  I mean really… I can follow the rules. 

I text Joe not to come by and go to bed.  I toss and turn for over an hour.  All I can think about is getting in that water tomorrow and kicking some ass.  I have missed this sport, but if I’m truthful with myself, I know that this is a milestone for me.  I am going to actually start to put Dylan behind me. 

I wake up early Saturday morning.  We don’t have to be at the pool until ten, but it’s eight thirty and I’m wide awake.  I throw on a pair of yoga pants, t-shirt, and flip flops and make my way to the café. As I walk down the stoop, I’m completely taken off guard when Joe is walking from the café with his arm around some girl.  I mean I know we aren’t together, but it stings just a little bit.  He sees me and drops his arm fast as lightening.  Obviously, he hadn’t planned on seeing me this early and my conversation with Cash is confirmed. He’s not gay.  Makes me wonder how many other girls he has been putting moves on?  Oh well, I shake it off and walk with my head held high. 

“Hey, Squirrel!  You’re up early.”

“Yeah, couldn’t sleep.  Guess I’m just anxious about today’s meet.”

“I bet so.  Word around campus is that you girls are going to open a can of whoop ass on them.  And I can’t wait to watch!”

“I sure hope so.  My parents, Tessa and Cash are coming.  I think Cash is even going to Hank’s tonight.  You want to go with us in the Love Machine?”

“You know I might as well.  Who knows that ride might help me pick up a chick or two.  Well, I’m going to head to my room.  I need to call my grandma.  Something’s not right at home.  When I talked to her yesterday, I could just tell. “

“Joe, let me know if I can help you.  I’ll see ya at eleven.” 

“Oh and Squirrel, good luck!”

“I don’t need luck, Jackalope Joe, ‘cause I swim like a fish!”  I continue to walk to the café and eat a waffle, fruit, and Diet Coke for breakfast before making my way back to Kluft.  Georgia, Caroline, Tori and Anna are all awake by the time I get back, but they skip breakfast.  I go to my room to get ready to head to the pool when I hear Tori in the hallway.  She is singing at the top of her lungs.  I swear that girl doesn’t give two shits what people think about her.  I walk into the hallway and see Georgia doubled over laughing. 

Tori stops and looks at me, “What?! I mean I’m just getting pumped for the meet today.  Hey you got a permanent marker in your room?”

“Yeah, but I already have one in my bag.”  I smirk.  It is a well-known fact that as swimmers we have suits, caps, and goggles, but no way to identify us. That is unless we write our name down our leg and pick our own number.

“See I knew I like you!  Let’s roll out girls.  I’m ready to swim some laps and take some names!”

Georgia and I look at each other, shake our heads, and smile.  Just gotta love her ‘cause I sure would hate to have her on my bad side. 

We get to the locker room and dress out.  I take the Sharpie from my bag and look at Tori.  She knows what I’m thinking. 

“Alright y’all, I’m not captain, but we gotta make marks. Anybody else wanna join in?”  Tori grabs the pen and walks over to Georgia.

“Georgia, what you want on yours?”  She shrugs her shoulders.  “What about
Shorty
?”  We shake our heads no.  That’s not original enough.  “What about Shorty-Do-Whop?”  I say.  “You know Georgia loves some rap music and is short.”  I look at the girls and they agree.  Tori writes
Shorty-Do-Whop
on the side of Georgia’s right leg and the number
ten
above it.

“Charley, your turn.  What is it that Joe calls you?”

“Squirrel.”

“Squirrel it is!  Now what number?”

“Easy, Double Zero.”

I take the pen from Tori and proceed to mark her with the word
Loco
and the number
four twenty
.   Tori is crazy without drugs, but that is her… making people think.

We make our way out the locker room doors into the pool area.  Monroe and Central have arrived and are warming up.  The stands are starting to fill.  I wonder when Mom, Dad, Tessa, and Cash will get here.  I push the thought aside and focus on me, myself and the pool.  As we stretch, the stands continue to fill. 
Where the heck is my family?
  As I begin to roll my shoulders backwards to loosen up, I see Mom, Dad, Tessa, Cash, and ohmygosh there is Piper!
Yay!
  I throw my hand up to wave before sliding on my goggles and jumping in to warm up.  The water is calling my name, in fact, I feel like I’ve never left.  This and the farm are my home.

Coach blows her whistle and we huddle up. You can see that she is excited, nervous, hell, maybe both.  She gives us a pep talk, tells us to kick some ass and take some names.  We do our team cheer, and it’s time for the first event.  Georgia is up.  It’s the 200 meter breaststroke.   With there being an exhibition meet, there aren’t as many events, but the hype is still there.  We have seats along the edge of the exterior wall that is a complete window.  The start gun sounds, and Georgia is in the water.  For her to be so freakin’ short that girl can move.  Tori and I jump from our seats and move to the bottom of her lane.  We hover over the end of the lane as Georgia reaches with the tips of her fingers before turning to head back down the lane. 

“Goooooooooooooo GA!” We yell.  “Push hard! Let’s go!”

Georgia is neck and neck with the girl from Monroe.  We follow her down the length of the pool and once she hits the flags, she gets an extra burst of energy and pushes to beat the girl from Monroe by a fingertip.

“That a way, Shorty-do-whop!”  Tori yells.

We chant our team cheer, and the events roll by.  I start to have a little nervous energy as the 200 meter backstroke approaches.  I know I have this, but I just can’t help it.  It’s like waiting on a new album to be released by Luke Bryan.  The anticipation is killer.  With two events before mine, I start to loosen up and walk toward the starting blocks.  I look up at my family and friends.  My mom is totally decked out in Southern apparel; Dad in his Carthartts and Drake Waterfowl t-shirt.  Tessa and Piper look like they just stepped out of Forever 21, and Cash looks like he’s ready for a night out. Jeans, button up, and boots. Completely yummy.  I look up and throw my head back. Tessa, Piper, and Cash all do the same.  Joe is sitting with the lacrosse guys and looks confused by the body language going on between the four of us.  He just doesn’t understand this goes way back.  I look at Joe and notion to my leg. He glances and smiles.

It’s time to rock ‘n roll. I adjust my cap, put my goggles in place, and shake my arms back and forth while I jump up and down to loosen up.  The official calls for my event, and I stand beside the start block. “Event 200 meter backstroke, swimmers enter the water feet first.”  I take a deep breath before jumping in and grabbing the bars on the start block and placing my feet on the wall.  I take another deep breath, and it’s time.  The official preps for the race, “Swimmers take your mark, set,” and the gun fires.  I explode off the wall and streamline past the flags and continue before taking the first stroke.  The water is cool, and I know it’s time to pace myself.  I can see the flags in my peripheral vision, I start to count. One, two, three, four, turn on five and flip turn and push off the wall with all my might.  I repeat this process for two more laps, and then on the final lap, I turn up the heat and try to push past my previous times in practice.  I see the flags and hear the stands and team cheering as I touch the wall.  I glance to the board and see the time. Oh. My. Gawsh. Best time ever!  And this is just an exhibition meet!

I get out of the pool and remove my goggles and cap. Then I am greeted by my teammates.  We huddle and do our team cheer again.  I glance to the stands and see my parents hollering at me, Piper and Tessa proceed to do the cabbage patch.
Like really
, we did that in middle school. Cash is standing there with his hands on his hips sporting a crooked little grin trying not to laugh at Tessa and Piper.  He gives me a high five in the air, and I return the process.  That’s our thing.  The lacrosse guys and Joe have come up with their own cheer for our team.  “Who loves the girls of Southern?  Lax Boys do!”  Tori, Georgia, Sarah, and I all laugh.  We cheer on our teammates until it’s time for relays.  I’ve been waiting for this event since like forever!  The official calls 4 X 200 meter Individual Medley Relay.  I look at Tori, Georgia, and Brittany.  “Let’s do the damn thing y’all!”  We have created our own warm up moves for everyone to know who we are.  Brittany takes the iPod and plugs it into the speaker. Miley Cyrus’ “We Can’t Stop” blares through.  We all walk in a line with an arm on the person in front of us as we step and roll to the sides and make our way to our lane.  The Lax boys go crazy.  We give them a hard time most days, but boy do we love to have fun with them at Hank’s.  Needless to say, they are in for it tonight. Minus me ‘cause I’m with Cash tonight.  We laugh, bump hips and take places.  Brittany turns down the music as the official gives her the evil eye then begins, “4 X 200 meter Individual Medley Relay, Backstrokes enter the water feet first.”  I adjust my cap and goggles and jump in.  There is no nervous energy this time. Instead, I’m elated to be in this event and kick some ass.  I grab the starting block, place my feet on the wall, take a deep breath, and wait for the official.  “Swimmers, take your mark, set…” I pull myself up into position, and the guns sounds.