Nolan's Evolution (37 page)

Raina felt tears well up. “With all I am,” she whispered.

“I hope you can forgive me.”

Elenora laughed mockingly. “Oh this should be interesting.”

Nolan turned toward the woman with a terrifying growl.

Elenora held up her hands. “For once I did nothing wrong! This is all on you, gorgeous! I will be surprised as well if she forgives you after this!”

Nolan trembled with rage and fear.

Raina shook her head, not understanding. “I’ve told you, there’s nothing you could do to change my love, Nolan….nothing!”

He turned back to her, and the anguish in his face was enough to make her fall to her knees. “Raina…I…” His eyes closed, and his words faltered.

“Don’t! I love you,” she whispered. She gripped the back of his neck and drew him down so she could kiss him. She sighed when his lips responded to hers, and some of his tension melted.

“Tell me,” she murmured against his mouth.

“Yes, tell her, Nolan,” Elenora sighed. “Tell her how you lied.”

His breathing accelerated and he gathered Raina to his chest, covering her ears.

“I’ve been waiting for this for a long time,” Elenora snickered.

“GET OUT!” His shout reverberated through the room.

Elenora blanched, and took a step back, intimidated by the burst of anger. She pouted, crossed her arms, and stomped from the room.

Raina felt the atmosphere around her was charged with anxiety. She stared up into the silvers. “I’m freaking out here, Nolan,” she whimpered.

He shook his head. “Raina you cannot freak out on me. Please promise me, you’ll just hear me out.” His eyes carefully gaged her reaction to his words.

Raina shook her head. “Freak out about what?”

Nolan swallowed. “There is one thing I never told you. I…I was hoping I’d never have to tell you, but it looks like that is unavoidable.”

Blue eyes looked up at him warily. “What haven’t you told me? And how could I freak out? You telling me you are immortal should have freaked me out. I am quite beyond that now. Don’t treat me like a fragile little thing…I can handle whatever it is.”

He frowned. “This is even beyond my immortality announcement Raina. Trust me.”

Her eyes widened now because she did trust him. “Nolan?” She stepped closer, letting his arm slip further around her.

“He’s here,” he murmured.

“Who is here?”

Nolan again closed his eyes. “Can you recall the events around David’s death?”

Raina blinked. “What?”

Nolan growled. “Think, Raina! What do you remember of the events?”

She trembled at the tension in his arms “Very little of them,” she admitted. “I….I was a little lost. Bradley and Emily helped plan the ceremony. David insisted on cremation, to make it simple. We didn’t have to worry about the burial, a casket, just spreading his ashes at sea…also his request. The rest is just a blur.”

Nolan drew in a breath. “I suppose that was best. No one would ever suspect.”

Raina frowned up at him. “I’d lost husband…what are you talking about suspect? Suspect what?”

He squeezed her waist gently. “God it happened so perfectly.”

“You’re speaking gibberish,” she sighed. She looked up into his face and wondered if Nolan was losing it. He certainly looked it.

“It was all a distraction.” His voice held pain.

“What was a distraction?”

He clipped her chin with his knuckle, so she meet his gaze full on. “David had hoped you’d be distracted…and not know.”

“Know what?” Raina whispered softly now.

Nolan sucked in a breath, and he fought against the panic rising in him. “That he never died.”

Raina’s gasp was sharp, and unbelieving. She shoved roughly away from Nolan. Her heart was failing her. It was finally going to happen. She was about to have a heart attack and die right here. "No," she said firmly. She held up her hand as Nolan moved toward her. "No! No no no no no." She shook her head. "You are not telling me this. This is not happening."

Nolan reached for her again. He was in agony himself.

Raina slapped that is hands. "I can't… I can't… I can't breathe!" She turned to the door and rush through it.

She didn't give Elenora a passing glance. She didn't want to see the gloating or the triumph in the dark eyes. She stumbled her way to the front door and then out onto the steps. She collapsed on them. Every muscle in her body was shaking with shock.

Nolan was right behind her and he didn't touch her as he sat down on the stair. His eyes were dark with sorrow. "I'm so so sorry." His voice was soft and grieved.

Raina placed her head between her knees and attempted to draw air into her lungs. She gasped in breaths.

“I should have told you long ago that he….”

“What the Hell are you talking about?” she sobbed. “I watched him passing. I saw him slipping from me, Nolan! Why would you say this? David is dead!”

Nolan looked hurt at her disbelief. He grabbed her up again. He ignored the tensing of her muscles, and her attempt to pull from him.  “Listen to me,” he whispered. The silvers darkened. “Why would I make up a story? What would this benefit me?”

Raina felt panicked, and the shock was seeping into her entire system. She felt her hands trembling where they were crushed between his chest and hers. “You said it was too late, you couldn’t heal him! You said Joseph didn’t change him…that David decided to pass. I…I don’t know what you are saying!” Her cheeks flushed, and tears filled her eyes. “What are you saying, Nolan?”

He shook his head sadly and lifted his shoulders. “I lied,” he whispered. “About that, I lied. I had to. You couldn’t know.”

She scowled. “I couldn’t know?” she said between gritted teeth. “What, like I know about you and Thanatos? Like I know about Michael Joseph, Jonathan, Richard, Arabella, Elenora? I couldn’t know my own husband is immortal?”

Nolan drew in a sharp breath.

She couldn’t help the feeling of rage that welled up in her. “My husband was alive and well, and you let me believe all this time he was gone? You made me fall in love with you? You made me forsake my own husband?”

“Made you?” Nolan’s voice was raw with pain.

Raina bit her lip.

“I made you do nothing,” he whispered.

She closed her eyes. “I didn’t mean it like that…I just meant…all this time I’ve been married…I’ve had a husband…”

Nolan shook her gently. “Raina, he ceased being your husband when he released you to me and he asked me to take you. He refused to return to you!”

Raina blinked at the hurtful words...

Nolan wiped the tears from her cheeks. He felt wetness on his own cheeks. “God, I can’t lose you, Raina. Please believe me!”

He had refused to return to her? She was too busy with her feelings of Nolan’s betrayal, she hadn’t entertained the question of why David never told her himself. She leaned against the stair, pushing against his chest so that he released her. “He…isn’t my husband?”

Nolan shook his head slowly. He fought to keep his torture at bay.

“How?” Her voice held little life.

He swallowed hard. “We have a choice when given the gift of immortality. We continue on with our old life until we no longer can, or we cut all ties. David…before his changer, request all ties severed from his past.”

Raina bit back her tears. “But he loved me, Nolan….why would he?” She trembled all over.

“Baby, I don’t know,” he murmured. “I find it unbelievable that anyone having belonged to you could let you go.” His heart was breaking and on his sleeve.

“Who else knew?”

Nolan grimaced.

“Thanatos? But he didn’t even know you were protecting me!” Her blue eyes held anguish.

“He witnessed David’s choice. He did not witness the request David made to me. A request I gladly said yes to. I couldn’t have stayed away from you if I had tried.” He went to reach for her again, but hesitated. “Aelan, please forgive me. I never meant to hurt you. I just couldn’t…”

Her heart softened seeing his torture. This had not been his fault. This had been thrust on him.

Nolan saw the fight leaving her and he moved to her. She went willingly into his arms… gentle arms. He breathed out a breath of relief, as she melted into him. His lips brushed a kiss against her hair.

“Nolan, Oh God Nolan. How can this be happening?”

He kissed her hair again. “Joseph told you how Richard changed when he became immortal? Before that he was a decent man, had a wife, children…a life. The same happened with David. There is no rhyme or reason. My only thought is that sometimes the heart of a man is not what he shows to others. There are hidden things.”

She shook her head, burying her face into his shirt, and wetting it with her tears. She felt her shock waning, and her need for Nolan growing. All of that rage evaporated. “What happened? Tell me from the moment I thought he was dead.”

Nolan sighed. “After you left the room, sure that he had breathed his last, I summoned Joseph. He…gifted David, and we snuck him out. Jonathan had written up the papers, so that I could handle David’s “cremation” and present the funeral home with his remains.”

“You? David said he’d hired someone to handle it all…it was you?”

Nolan nodded.

“How have you hidden this?”

Nolan nuzzled her hair. “Out of necessity, Aelan, please, listen to the rest of the story.”

He waited, until he felt her relax against him, ready to hear more. “We took him to Josephs for a few days. He wanted to prepare how he would reveal himself to you.” The strong arms flexed around her. “He meet Richard on one of his rare visits. David was sucked in, and Richard had already filtered thoughts into his head. It was eerie the change that came over him. Suddenly nothing was more important to David, then being with, and learning from Richard.”

Raina looked up at him with surprise. “With Richard?”

Nolan swept her hair from her face. “He requested Joseph bestow him to Richard.”

Raina wondered when her heart would resume to a normal cadence. It was one shock after the other. “Be…bestowed?”

“Joseph wanted to refuse, but David was ademenant that this is what he wanted. He begged Joseph, and after words of warning…he finally did as David wished.” He rubbed her back soothingly. “David insisted that you shouldn’t know. He had Jonathan draft a contract that said the secret would remain just that…a secret. No ties.”

“You are telling me now. Doesn’t that go against the contract?”

He shook his head. “I refused to sign. I didn’t want to be involved in something like that. I simply gave my word that I would not.”

“And your word is gold,” she murmured. A spark of respect rose in her tone.

“It’s worthless now to you, isn’t it? After this lie?”

She trembled, but shook her head. “It was the protector in you…you were doing your job.”

“And after I wasn’t your protector?”

She shrugged. “You were acting as a man in love.”

He squeezed her. “I do love you.”

She pulled in a shaky breath. “That is what David said.”

He growled deep in his chest.

“Why did you keep this from me, Nolan?” Her voice was dead….flat now.

“I didn’t want to taint the memory you had of him, Raina. It would have killed you in your already depressed state.”  He rubbed her spine gently.

“I’m…I’m…I don’t know what I am,” she sighed.

“Mine,” he whispered possessively.

“One man’s junk is another man’s treasure,” her voice cracked.

“Aelan,” he sighed, burying his face against her hair. “You have never been anyone’s junk. David is an idiot. But you are my treasure.” He pressed a kiss to her hair.

“What’s to say you won’t decide there is something better out there for you? Like he did?”

He gently guided her face up. “I’ve tasted of treasures…I’ve lived on both sides of it sweetheart, and I would still choose you over every bit of it.”

She smiled at the tender look in his face. “Yeah?”

His mouth tipped up in a handsome grin. “Yeah.” He brushed her hair behind her shoulder and pressed a kiss to her lips, soft and tender, but it still left fire trails in both their veins. He drew in an unsteady breath, and twined his fingers with hers.

“We have to face them,” he sighed, pressing his forehead to hers. “I wouldn’t be surprised if they know we are here already. Though, they’ve been pretty absorbed in conversation.” He stopped to listen.

“Crazy immortal hearing,” she teased softly. She drew in a breath and squeezed his fingers. “Thank you for telling me this, Nolan…even if it was forced on you. I know how much it cost you!” She stood up and pulled at his hand so that he rose above her as he stood.

Nolan grinned. He wanted to draw her up into his arms and carry her away from this place. The steady eyes that watched him, kept him from doing so. “You are so strong,” he whispered. “God you’re magnificent!”

Raina blushed. “I’m not strong Nolan. I am determined though. I told you nothing could change how I feel for you. Nothing will.” She reached out and grasped a handful of his shirt. She smiled up at him.