Now Until Forever (23 page)
Authors: Karen White-Owens
“I know.”
“Don't do this to us again,” Keir demanded.
“Dad, do you love Ryan?”
Adam's question caught Keir with his mouth open. The last thing he expected to hear from his son was a question about Ryan.
“What's that got to do with anything?” Keir asked.
“Well, do you?” Adam's eyes compelled his father to answer.
At once it felt as if their roles had been reversed. Keir was the child, and Adam, the adult. Through the years, Keir always told his children the truth, and today wouldn't be any different. “Yes, I do.”
“She loves you, too, Dad. Did you know that?”
Those words swelled in Keir's heart. Keir wanted nothing more than to go to Ryan and demand she end this self-imposed exile and come back to him. But the reality of the situation was love wasn't enough.
Adam approached his father and placed a hand on his shoulder. “If you love each other, why can't you be together?”
“It's more complicated than that, son.”
“How? Tell me.”
Keir tiptoed through this situation. “It's not just about Ryan and me. She's concerned for you and Emily.”
“You always told me that anything important in your life was worth fighting for. Don't you want to fight for Ryan, Dad? Isn't she important enough?”
“Adamâ”
“Ryan's great! She loves you and us. If you love her back, you should fight for her.”
Keir ran a tired hand over his face. Lord, so much truth all at once was making his head hurt.
The boy continued to hammer at his father. “Dad, we miss her. Things feel as bad as they did when you left home. Please don't let things go the same way. Emily and me want to go to Ryan's house and do things with her like we used to. You know, like go to the park, the zoo, and dinner.”
His son had a major point. Wasn't Ryan worth fighting for? Like a person emerging from the depths of a drug-induced sleep, Keir cleared his head, and he realized his son was correct. Why had he rolled over and played dead for the past few weeks? Ryan was truly worth any effort, and it was time for him to fight and win her back.
He patted his son on the shoulder. “Thanks, son.”
With a puzzled expression on his face, Adam mumbled, “Huh?”
“Thanks for waking me up, making me see the light.”
Keir missed Ryan and the time they spent together. The nights they enjoyed together, holding each other and just talking. Evenings dining out, followed by hours of making love.
Laughing, Keir hugged his son. “You're right. Ryan is worth fighting for.”
Adam drew one hand into a fist, jerked it down, and yelped, “Yes!”
“Adam, don't get your hopes up,” Keir cautioned. “I can't guarantee anything.”
“You're going to try? Right, Dad?”
“Absolutely.” He placed an arm around his son's shoulder. “Come on. Let's get you home to your mother.”
“Okay.” Adam grabbed his book bag and trailed after his father.
Keir stopped in the doorway. He shut and locked his door after Adam. The pair started down the hall to the front of the building. “You're in trouble with your mother. You know that, don't you? That is not a good thing.”
Head bowed, Adam nodded. “Sorry.”
Keir steered his son through the studio maze. At the exit, he turned to Adam. “When we get you home, you better do some Oscar-worthy apologizing to her, or you will probably be grounded until you're fifty.”
“Can you help me out, Dad?”
Pursing his lips, Keir shook his head. “Sorry, Charlie. Not this time. You made this bed. Now you have to sleep in it.”
Sorrowfully, Adam sighed.
When they reached the Jaguar, Keir watched Adam climb into the car and buckle his seat belt. Chuckling softly, Keir shook his head and thought,
My twelve-year-old son has more sense than I do.
My twelve-year-old son has more sense than I do.
Chapter 33
With a heavy heart, Ryan slowly returned to her office. Even though she and Keir had only been together for a few moments, seeing him had stirred all her emotions into a fiery ball of frustration and pain.
Ryan halted outside her office, praying her pigheaded boss was on the set and not in the little cubbyhole they shared. Pacing back and forth, Ryan grimaced, fighting the cramps created by the stress of this situation. Seeing no point in delaying, she turned the knob, opened the door, and stepped inside.
Good! An empty office.
With a sigh of relief, Ryan hurried across the floor to her desk and sank into the chair. She swiveled toward the window, finger combing the hair at her nape.
Lord, she couldn't keep this up. All of this drama had her on edge, affected her sleep, and hindered her ability to eat. Adam's visit to the studio had sent Ryan into a tizzy. Since the night she left Keir's house, she'd cut off all contact with the man and his children, hoping this would make separation easier. Unfortunately, Adam's insights into her relationship with his father had been right on target. But, Ryan refused to relent. Above all else, Adam and Emily's happiness remained paramount. Her own well-being came in a poor second.
With the scent of Elizabeth Arden's Red Door perfume, Glo burst into the office. Arms loaded with scripts and sketch pads, she stopped and looked around the small space before heading to her desk. The mass of paper slipped from her arms and landed on her desk, sliding across the surface. “Where's your company?” Glo asked.
Surprised, Ryan stared at Glo. How did she know about the child? “You saw Adam?”
Glo shook her head. “No. My hand was on the doorknob when I heard his voice. I kept going so you two would have a bit of privacy.”
Not sure how to respond to this act of kindness, Ryan mumbled, “Oh. Thank you.”
Glo sank into her chair and began to clear her desk. She gathered the scripts and sketch pads, stacking them into neat piles. Next came the loose pencils and pens. Glo bunched them together and dropped them into the middle desk drawer. “So tell me. When did you split with Keir?”
Ryan's eyes grew large, and her cheeks burned scarlet. Her feelings were too raw to discuss, so she needed a topic change. Besides, why would she talk with Glo? The woman had made it clear how much she loathed their pairing.
Stalling, Ryan ran her tongue across her dry lips before deciding to ask a question of her own. “How do you know about that?”
The older woman scoffed, leaning forward in her chair like she was talking with an old buddy. “Please. It's all over the studio.”
Great!
Her coworkers were spreading rumors about her and Keir. Ryan turned toward Glo. “I hate this kind of gossip. It was one of the reasons I didn't want to get involved with Keir.”
Her coworkers were spreading rumors about her and Keir. Ryan turned toward Glo. “I hate this kind of gossip. It was one of the reasons I didn't want to get involved with Keir.”
“That's something you need to get over,” Glo advised, tucking her feet under her body.
“What?”
“Honey, people are going to gossip whether you like it or not. It's human nature to be curious. And let's be honest. Keir is too interesting a topic to ignore. The gossipmongers want all the gory details when the story involves someone big at the studio.”
“I've never wanted my private life to be on display.” Shrugging, Glo said matter-of-factly, “Get over it. It was. It is.”
Ryan moaned sorrowfully.
“Oh, come on. It's not going to change how you do business. Ryan, you've always worried about your reputation and how being linked with Keir would affect your career. It never mattered. You already have a spotless reputation. Everyone knows you get the job done. Your skills speak for themselves. So stop moaning and pissing over what other people think. They don't pay any bills in your house. It really doesn't matter.”
Doubtful, Ryan replied, “I guess you're right. Everyone already knows that Keir and I split up.”
Glo remained quiet for a moment. “Emily and Adam got to you that much?”
Confused, Ryan stared at her boss. “What? How do you know that? Did Keir tell you that?”
“Well, there's no point in me lying. I heard you talking to Adam.”
Embarrassed, Ryan swiveled the chair away from Glo and faced the wall. Generally, people who eavesdropped pretended they didn't know the details of the conversation they overheard. Peeved, Ryan glared at Glo, saying, “Who told you about us?”
“Nobody. I listened at the door.” Without a speck of remorse, Glo added, “What happened?”
Ryan waved away the question and said, “Nothing.” For a beat she sat silently, and then she said, “Something.” She wondered what was inciting her to confess all of this to Glo, a woman who had treated her cruelly. Maybe she needed to tell someone, and Glo was in the right place at the right time. Whatever the reason, Ryan started to talk. “There was a big upset at a baseball game, and Adam got into trouble. I found out later that it was over something the other kids said about me. Adam and Emily are great kids. I don't want to see them caught in the middle of a lot of adult crap.”
“What about Keir?”
“What about him?”
“Oh, come on, Ryan. He's done everything within his power to make you happy. I can't believe he'd let you walk away that easily.”
An overwhelming sense of sadness and loss washed over Ryan. She wanted to cry her heart out for all that she'd never have again. But she refused to shed a tear in front of her boss.
Ryan loved Keir so much. This was the second time she'd lost someone she truly loved. It didn't get any easier. Actually, she felt as if she'd left her heart at Keir's house.
God!
She rolled her eyes. That line sounded like dialogue from a soap opera.
God!
She rolled her eyes. That line sounded like dialogue from a soap opera.
“Your concern for Keir's children is commendable,” said Glo. She stood and approached Ryan's desk, perching on the edge.
“I'm not doing this for brownie points.” Ryan's voice trembled. “This is damn hard.”
Glo ran her manicured fingers through her hair, fluffing the blond locks. “I'm sure it is.”
An uneasy silence followed. Wallowing in her own misery, Ryan ignored the older woman.
“Honestly, I'm seeing you in a different way,” Glo stated.
“How so?” Ryan inquired. Maybe focusing on something besides her own problems would make her feel better.
“Over the last couple of months, I've accused you of a lot of things. For lack of a better term, I thought you were a gold digger. Within months of getting this job, you started dating the head of the studio. In my gut, I believed you were using Keir to further your career. And then Keir began to make changes on the set to accommodate you. That burned my ass.” Glo hissed between clenched teeth.
Yeah, Ryan remembered all of that and more. Plus, how difficult it had been to work with Glo.
“But that was only one of my issues,” Glo admitted softly. “Your presence threatened me. You did excellent work, and people liked you. I got really worried about my position.”
Shaking her head, Ryan said, spacing the words evenly, “I don't want your job. I like what I do. It's satisfies my creative nature, and I can leave the rest of the studio crap to you.”
“Thanks. I think.” Glo's hand dropped to her side. Her tongue ran across her red painted lips. “I'm beginning to believe I might have misjudged you.”
Ryan snorted. “What brought you to that decision?”
“Your eyes are full of pain. And nobody in this business puts anyone ahead of their own needs.”
Embarrassed, Ryan turned away. She didn't want Glo's sympathy. What happened between her and Keir was their business, and she could handle the fallout.
“You love Keir. Don't you?” asked Glo.
Instead of a question, Glo had stated a fact. The lightbulb had finally switched on.
“Yes.”
“I would suggest you take a minute and think long and hard about your decision to split with him.”
“I can't let his kids take the hits for what we've done. Adam was protecting me. He shouldn't be doing that. Emily and Adam deserve to be happy, to have a safe and comfortable childhood. Every child deserves that.”
“You're right. They do.”
“They've already been through enough. Their parents are divorced, and now they're shuttled from house to house. I won't add more problems to their young lives.”
“What about you?” Glo's voice had an infinitely compassionate tone.
Frowning, Ryan answered, “I don't understand.”
“You've suffered, too. Your husband died in a tragic and totally unnecessary accident.” Glo stood, with her hands on her hips. “What do you deserve? Haven't you earned a shot at happiness?”
“I can't put myself before Keir's children. That wouldn't be right.”
“Where did you get that idea?”
“My mother. And she backed up those words with action.”
Glo folded her arms across her chest. “Maybe your mother did. But, this is your life. You don't have any kids.”
“Keir does.”
“You don't have to sacrifice your life. I assume your mother was talking about your family.”
“Of course,” Ryan responded cautiously, uncertain where Glo was headed with this train of thought.
“You don't owe Keir's children anything.”
“Yes, I do.”
“I don't believe that. Think back. Did your mother save your family or every child in the neighborhood?”
“My family.”
“Exactly. Here's my take on the situation. In theory, your mother's right. Children should always come first. But, we're talking about your future with a man you love. I don't think your mother would have approved of the way you've handle this thing with Keir. Above all else, I'm sure she wanted you to be happy.” Stopping in front of the younger woman, Glo continued, “Here's the big question. What do you really want, Ryan?”
“Keir,” Ryan said confidently.
“Then go for it.”
“How can I? I don't want to hurt anyone.”
“What you're doing now is hurting everyone. You, Keir, and his kids. It's time to put an end to it.”
Shaking her head, Ryan admitted, “I don't know.”
“Well, I do,” Glo stated. “Have you considered how being with Keir enhances the kids' and your lives? All of your experiences with your mother are things you can pass on to Adam and Emily. Leaving them is not the only way you can make them happy. Matter of fact, Adam sounded pretty upset.”
Ryan studied her boss, dissecting her comments. Glo was making sense.
“Keir has always been one of my favorite people to work for,” Glo continued. “And because I've been with him so long, I worry about him. Even though he's this tough businessman, he's a good guy at heart.” Glo moved around the small space, pacing their cubbyhole. “I felt as if you were coming between us. I also suspected, eventually you'd hurt him.”
“I just wanted to do my job. Meeting Keir was not on my agenda. But I did. And I'm glad I did. Keir refused to let me ignore him.”
“I can see that now,” Glo admitted.
Ryan studied the older woman, with sadness in her heart. “It's done now. Let it go.”
“No. I don't think I will. I need to say this. Because I care so much for Keir, I was very protective of him. The breakup of his marriage devastated him. He'd been through so much. I didn't want to see him hurt a second time. After that one chick lost her mind, I felt compelled to protect him from predators. You were new here, and Keir tried to hide the gleam of admiration in his eyes but failed miserably. I can see that he loves you. What are you going to do about it?”
“I'm going to figure out a way to get him back.”
“Now you're talking.” Glo gave Ryan's shoulder a quick pat of approval.
Other books
Breathe Again by Chetty, Kamy
Song of Princes (Homeric Chronicles #1) by Janell Rhiannon
Other People by Martin Amis
The Specter by Saul, Jonas
Blaze's Second Chance (The Sinclair Men) by Crescent, Sam
Attack of the Ninja Kittens! by Michael Broad
A Mile in My Flip-Flops by Melody Carlson
Escape from the Past by Oppenlander, Annette
Rock with You (Risking It All) by Rachel Lacey
About My Sisters by Debra Ginsberg
